"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[KrustyDawg7]

In my opinion, the great thing about being a SD is the liberation from having to observe Valentine's Day, Birthdays, Christmas, and all the others. I am NOT their "boyfriend". I don't feel obligated to a SB beyond any usual allowance or pay-per-meet arrangement. Same reason that I don't do sleep-overs, at their place, or mine. Otherwise you are getting on the slippery slope to having a committed relationship, and once the girl gets to thinking she's "entitled" to all these extra benefits, then you're screwed. Anyway, a lot of these girls are juggling more than one SD or have a regular boyfriend / spouse that they are cheating on with you. So you need to be the "bad ass" and just ignore all this crap. I haven't had to observe Valentine's Day for 15 years, and I'm still getting plenty of sex. That's my story, though I respect others that may disagree.

What's up brothers? Greetings from Atlanta. Relatively new to the bowl but have had great success so far and enjoying the journey.

Figured I would reach out to the senior forum on all things SD / SB for a little insight. How do you guys handle Valentine's Day? Obviously you can't spend time with your entire harem. And spending any time if you have a SO is unlikely. So what do you do to compensate? If anything? Will your SBs expect anything from your experience. I know Amazon offers egift cards that are sent instantly via text or email (make sure you use a burner amazon account, please). Just wanted to know your tips and tricks for handling this "holiday" . Obviously you could easily be out $$$ if you're too generous to the entire flock. Thoughts?

[DirtyDeeds38]

Dude is IMHO as greedy and he is savvy. I am sure he realizes that BP got hammered by LE and is now cr at p and other sites have followed that lead (pics & numbers only) as to avoid troubles of their own (or maybe they got hammered too? Thus the number of places where one can look up p*ssy for dating has shrunk, so with his "insulated" site, he thinks he can charge more and get away with it. Lots of guys us SA as a one-off hook up site and not for LT arrangements. Only way to stop that is to quit paying en-mass. THAT or he recognizes that it won't be long before LE and AGs go after his business and he needs to get as much money stick piled before his wings get clipped.

There is always SD4 Me. LOL. But the point is perhaps it is time to find and develop other sites rather than Wade's?

In my humble opinion it was a stretch under the constitution and first amendment rights to shut down BP. I did not agree with it and thus far, neither have the courts. That said, if we have LE and AG targeting the sugar baby thing, then we truly no longer live in a free country and live in a country that applies and makes up laws as we go. I don't care that it is distasteful to the bible belt mentality in America, it is an adults free choice to play sexually and to connect with whom they like. If 20-something young women enjoy the company of older men, who's fucking business is it. Yes, prostitution is illegal, but even that is such a grey area of the law, I see no way they can apply it mass coverage by simply shutting down swag dating and websites that cater to it.

I agree that for the average judgmental fuck out there, sugar dating looks hideous. But so does half the other shit we do anymore in this country. We either are free or we are not. They will just shove a couple bad examples in the medias face and then the masses will accept more of their rights being taken. Voices silenced and free will controlled. When in reality, you can use these uncommon and extreme examples with just about anything.

[Ripvan12]

What's up brothers? Greetings from Atlanta. Relatively new to the bowl but have had great success so far and enjoying the journey.

Figured I would reach out to the senior forum on all things SD / SB for a little insight. How do you guys handle Valentine's Day? Obviously you can't spend time with your entire harem. And spending any time if you have a SO is unlikely. So what do you do to compensate? If anything? Will your SBs expect anything from your experience. I know Amazon offers egift cards that are sent instantly via text or email (make sure you use a burner amazon account, please). Just wanted to know your tips and tricks for handling this "holiday" . Obviously you could easily be out $$$ if you're too generous to the entire flock. Thoughts?

[FarFarAway]

I wrote to them and complained about the $90 a month cost, basically they could give a s**t. So I'm walking away. I'm not a cheapskate and have plenty of funds to put into the hobby, but it's the principle of ripping people off. Generally the site is not worth all the trouble you go to in order to meet POTs. Maybe it works for younger guys (30's to 40's) but for older SD's it's slim pickings. Lots of escorts have moved to SA and I don't mess with the under 25 crowd for various reasons. Doesn't leave much. Maybe in Richmond it works better and is worth the money but smaller cities and out in the boonies it's rough.

I can believe that SA might not be worth it away from urban centers. I am in southern California and there is continuous population just about from the border to Santa Barbara. Probably 25 million people. If you limit yourself to 25 YO though, you are going to have trouble. It is faulty to think if you are 60 you can't score w / a low 20's girl, even teens. I have succeeded multiple times w / girls who are 1/3 my age. Just keep in mind that this Richmond thread is the de facto national thread for sugar bowl activities, what people report is about their local experience, and there may be a *lot* of variation out there. If you need to know the best way to find SBs in your area, go to that area's thread.

[KrustyDawg7]

I wrote to them and complained about the $90 a month cost, basically they could give a s**t. So I'm walking away. I'm not a cheapskate and have plenty of funds to put into the hobby, but it's the principle of ripping people off. Generally the site is not worth all the trouble you go to in order to meet POTs. Maybe it works for younger guys (30's to 40's) but for older SD's it's slim pickings. Lots of escorts have moved to SA and I don't mess with the under 25 crowd for various reasons. Doesn't leave much. Maybe in Richmond it works better and is worth the money but smaller cities and out in the boonies it's rough.

Dude is IMHO as greedy and he is savvy. I am sure he realizes that BP got hammered by LE and is now cr at p and other sites have followed that lead (pics & numbers only) as to avoid troubles of their own (or maybe they got hammered too? Thus the number of places where one can look up p*ssy for dating has shrunk, so with his "insulated" site, he thinks he can charge more and get away with it. Lots of guys us SA as a one-off hook up site and not for LT arrangements. Only way to stop that is to quit paying en-mass. THAT or he recognizes that it won't be long before LE and AGs go after his business and he needs to get as much money stick piled before his wings get clipped.

There is always SD4 Me. LOL. But the point is perhaps it is time to find and develop other sites rather than Wade's?

[EvilTmp]

So you give up your identity (she will find out sooner than later), with the possibility of having to evict her? And you have an SO with family? You are clearly out of your mind. The potential for complications and her blackmailing you is simply too high.

Take a step back and re-evaluate what you're doing here. And yeah, SA is all platonic and GPS now so deal with it.

Brothers,

I have not been very successful in finding a decent long term SB by offering gifts / allowance so I have been thinking of getting an apartment in my name and offer it to women in exchange for their company / favors with the understanding that she can move out whenever she is no longer interested in continuing the arrangement. Of course asking her to leave may not be so easy which means I have to be sure of getting someone who I can be with long term. Living with her is not an option due to SO and family!

I realize that SA and similar sites will not be the right place to find such women. So where do I look for women searching for a place? CL, Roomster do colleges have their own forums for such postings?

[FarFarAway]

Brothers,

I have not been very successful in finding a decent long term SB by offering gifts / allowance so I have been thinking of getting an apartment in my name and offer it to women in exchange for their company / favors with the understanding that she can move out whenever she is no longer interested in continuing the arrangement. Of course asking her to leave may not be so easy which means I have to be sure of getting someone who I can be with long term. Living with her is not an option due to SO and family!

I realize that SA and similar sites will not be the right place to find such women. So where do I look for women searching for a place? CL, Roomster do colleges have their own forums for such postings?

Hmm, something suggests you haven't thought this through. An important element of bowl arrangements is distance / deniability / anonymity. If she is living in an apartment you rent, there is no way she will not know way too much about you. Do you really want her threatening to call your wife if you try to kick her out, or just do anything else that displeases a woman?

[PghGuy2005]

Brothers,

I have not been very successful in finding a decent long term SB by offering gifts / allowance so I have been thinking of getting an apartment in my name and offer it to women in exchange for their company / favors with the understanding that she can move out whenever she is no longer interested in continuing the arrangement. Of course asking her to leave may not be so easy which means I have to be sure of getting someone who I can be with long term. Living with her is not an option due to SO and family!

I realize that SA and similar sites will not be the right place to find such women. So where do I look for women searching for a place? CL, Roomster do colleges have their own forums for such postings?

[FruitNinja]

Traveling is an example, but the type of travel they would consider spoiling is taking her somewhere she specifically wants to go as opposed to traveling somewhere you were already headed anyway (i.e. special trip for her entertainment).

Other common examples are taking her shopping, suffering through a movie you didn't want to see but she did, taking her on some activity that she's always wanted to do but never had the chance. I rarely actually do anything like this, I'm just saying this is what many of them consider being spoiled. Basically anything that you don't really want to do, and probably 99% of other men don't, but she does. Just think of things a father would do for his daughter on her birthday, anything that fills in the blank there would be an example.

Then there is the method of making them feel special through words and every day actions. This is just a learned skill. It's a fine balancing act that involves never relinquishing your dominance, while making her feel she is extraordinarily special. Just think of how a good father would act with his daughter -- she can't make the rules, and she can't act up without discipline, and he is in charge of everything but she receives his constant adoration. That's what most of the ones I meet are looking for, the strong but adoring dad they never had.

That last paragraph is where my specialty is. I don't take them on expensive trips or to ballgames or concerts or anything like that.

On the money! I look at it like business. Figure out where the hurt is and then be the band-aide. Yesterday, on the second date, I got the young Latina to share her traumas with me. As she started crying I hugged her and consoled her. She just melted. I don't spend huge money on them but I let them know that I am always there for them. The trauma was her dad losing faith in her. She's smart and a hard working student, and her father took away her self esteem in one incident. I will actually help her get over that hurt because I am well versed in human psychology. (Business 101) In the mean time I will also enjoy her beautiful youth. At the end of the day all the SB I've had walked away better and stronger women than when they met me. Most of mine have lasted 2-3 years. When they are strong and can make it on their own it's usually time to cut cords and start hunting again.

[FruitNinja]

I don't even deal with the 35+ crowd of ladies in the bowl. While there are definitely exceptions, I find them to generally be delusional and angry people. They seem to try to counteract the the loss of value and diminished beauty brought by aging by trying to pretend that their age / experience somehow makes them better than their competition.

In terms of sugar dating, 30 is about the cut off date for me but I generally look for 18-25 year olds. Between 25-30 they get very relationship minded and that can lead to a lot of clingy behavior.

18-25 is the sweet spot. I'm seeing a 30 year old and she is amazing in bed. All she want's to do is please me. Problem is, she's always either drinking or smoking pot, and going off on these tangents where all I want to say is shut the fuck up. She owns two businesses and is about the most neurotic person I've ever met. The young ones want to please because of daddy issues but they are still a fresh canvas and very malleable.

[JZLizard]

Tried to message you JR but said you were full.

Yeah, I get so many PMs that I just stopped dealing with them at all. Best to just post comments here.

[IbDaddy]

Traveling is an example, but the type of travel they would consider spoiling is taking her somewhere she specifically wants to go as opposed to traveling somewhere you were already headed anyway (i.e. special trip for her entertainment).

Other common examples are taking her shopping, suffering through a movie you didn't want to see but she did, taking her on some activity that she's always wanted to do but never had the chance. I rarely actually do anything like this, I'm just saying this is what many of them consider being spoiled. Basically anything that you don't really want to do, and probably 99% of other men don't, but she does. Just think of things a father would do for his daughter on her birthday, anything that fills in the blank there would be an example.

Then there is the method of making them feel special through words and every day actions. This is just a learned skill. It's a fine balancing act that involves never relinquishing your dominance, while making her feel she is extraordinarily special. Just think of how a good father would act with his daughter -- she can't make the rules, and she can't act up without discipline, and he is in charge of everything but she receives his constant adoration. That's what most of the ones I meet are looking for, the strong but adoring dad they never had.

That last paragraph is where my specialty is. I don't take them on expensive trips or to ballgames or concerts or anything like that.

Tried to message you JR but said you were full.

[JZLizard]

Would it include travel or being together in public as in normal dating not an option for those of us with SOs! If it is just talking or otherwise being together in semi-private (parks etc.) places then yes we can do that!

Traveling is an example, but the type of travel they would consider spoiling is taking her somewhere she specifically wants to go as opposed to traveling somewhere you were already headed anyway (i.e. special trip for her entertainment).

Other common examples are taking her shopping, suffering through a movie you didn't want to see but she did, taking her on some activity that she's always wanted to do but never had the chance. I rarely actually do anything like this, I'm just saying this is what many of them consider being spoiled. Basically anything that you don't really want to do, and probably 99% of other men don't, but she does. Just think of things a father would do for his daughter on her birthday, anything that fills in the blank there would be an example.

Then there is the method of making them feel special through words and every day actions. This is just a learned skill. It's a fine balancing act that involves never relinquishing your dominance, while making her feel she is extraordinarily special. Just think of how a good father would act with his daughter -- she can't make the rules, and she can't act up without discipline, and he is in charge of everything but she receives his constant adoration. That's what most of the ones I meet are looking for, the strong but adoring dad they never had.

That last paragraph is where my specialty is. I don't take them on expensive trips or to ballgames or concerts or anything like that.

[JZLizard]

What is the typical age range for this type of SBs? I would guess this may not be true for the older ones ( 35-40) as they likely to be in the bowl only for the $.

I don't even deal with the 35+ crowd of ladies in the bowl. While there are definitely exceptions, I find them to generally be delusional and angry people. They seem to try to counteract the the loss of value and diminished beauty brought by aging by trying to pretend that their age / experience somehow makes them better than their competition.

In terms of sugar dating, 30 is about the cut off date for me but I generally look for 18-25 year olds. Between 25-30 they get very relationship minded and that can lead to a lot of clingy behavior.

[FarFarAway]

Last Halloween SA offered 1/3 off are there other occasions when they run specials? Such as this Valentine's day! This guy recently raised his prices by nearly 30%(70 to 90 for monthly) and removed the separate pricing in the mobile app (week for $35) hence the reluctance to pay full price.

The costs of a SA membership will be a fraction of what you spend on real arrangements, especially if you are trying to dodge a SO. In a month on there you can get enough leads to last for quite a while. I don't have a membership now, I am fishing in some other ponds. There are disadvantages, a lot of crap to sift through, but now and then you find a real gem. I still think SA is the best place to get right to what you are looking for, it's just there's a lot of GPS there too.