"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

**Golfcart** · 01-10-13 03:58

Operator error here.

**Golfcart** · 01-10-13 03:53

Originally Posted by F Scott [View Original Post]

*** The whole thing has made me think back on the many, and creative, excuses I have gotten from babies for missing their appointments. ***

Scott, she know she can because she did. The fat and ugly ones don't play games.

**Max899** · 01-10-13 02:35

From the Las Vegas non-pro thread.

Originally Posted by Max899 [View Original Post]

I had another wonderful time with my UTR girl. She came over Saturday about 5pm. She let me take her to dinner afterward. She wanted Pizza and I was thinking the same thing. Total damage including pizza was 2.90. However 2.5 hours was given including dinner. She is amazingly sweet and nice, I can't get enough of her. I asked her what her thoughts were about a sugar daddy / sugar baby relationship were. She was non-committal. I suppose I should have expected that. What is the general thinking on converting a hot 21 yr old from a CG to a SB?

I have been reading your thread quite a bit and decided to ask the same question here. Can you take an amazing CG that you connect with well and bring her into a SB role? I would love to hear your thoughts on this, or if you have tried and what the results were.

Thanks!

Max

**Hernando** · 01-09-13 12:23

" The sugar world has been a way for me to be content in my current marriage situation." John G Smith.

This my friends, is the common thread in this world. I have counseled extensively trying to find the magic answer for my discontent, and no one has it. The bottom line is to suck it up and try to make the most of a less than perfect situation or change it up. Divorce is so radical but perhaps the best long term solution because one can be free to pursue happiness openly instead of on the down low. But. , and there are lots of buts. Money, children, society, job are all impacted, but the impact is greater still if you are caught in flagrente dilicto (sic?) There is a great deal of energy spent planning a tryst. 1st finding a POT, meeting and wooing her, setting up the FC, arranging the $$$ under the radar, hitting the right blend of communication and interaction between NSA vs emotional attachment. Whew! It's exhausting! If we all spend as much time and energy on our legit endeavors we would be happily married kings of industry.

Soooo, to play or not to play, that is the question. And since you are reading this you have chosen to play. I must say, I really like the energy of the Sugar Bowl. It is exciting and fun as hell. Maybe the danger adds that extra zing to life. And nothing is better than popping a HCB SB (or whatever your choice of treat is ). I have happily settled down with one SB so do not have the stories to tell like you entertaining Lotharios, but I enjoy hearing them immensely. I am pursuing emotional attachment instead of multifucking at the moment My SB is very reliable, always considerate, and a pleasure to be around. I love 20 somethings!

**AliasSM** · 01-09-13 06:27

Good information to share and timing is good as usual. Just got stood up today in fact. SB was one of my backups and we have met several times in the FC. She is always fun but not as passionate as my ATF. She is heading out of town soon for good and wanted to meet a few more times before she left. Texted me several times over the last week trying to schedule something and I finally agreed to yesterday. She was good with it the night before, confirmed all was still good arounf noon the day of the meeting, then tells me at 3:45 that she can't make the 4:30 meeting. Luckily I hadn't yet booked the room. I didn't ask for the excuse because they are almost always lame and I suspect that she overbooked because she wanted to score one final sugar payoff for sure before leaving town.

The most common reason I get from a SB is that she has her monthly visitor. Hard to argue that one. I like DATY way too much to play when the visitor is in town, so I appreciate the honesty when that happens.

We all know this isn't a perfect hobby. The noshows are just another price we pay to play.

Alias

**John G Smith** · 01-08-13 16:36

Interesting topics. What I like about this forum is that we're able to have a bit of self-awareness about ourselves.

The topic is timely for me because I might be back out in the market again for a new SB (s). I don't know yet.

My Escort Baby is in the wind. I haven't heard from her since before Christmas. She hasn't posted any new ads either to my knowledge. But I'm not too surprised by this and never really had much expectations for her.

I met up with the Asian College baby right before Christmas and we actually had a great M&G. We got along very well and she kept saying how surprised she that it was going so well. However at the very end of the date, she said she couldn't go through with an "arrangement". She wanted to tell me earlier supposedly but I was already in traffic on the way. But I think the real reason is, she didn't need the money anymore. A day before our meetup, her family invited her back to Korea to stay for a month during her school break. So even though we got along, she didn't need the money bad enough anymore to sleep with an older guy she just met. That said, since we did get along so well, I have a feeling she may be open again toward an arrangement a few months from now when she has money problems again.

And then there's my ATF. As mentioned earlier, we had an issue where she didn't give me any honey on our date after I gave her all that sugar. It was pretty much resolved, but then a week or two later I said I wouldn't be giving her "extra" cash and stuff until we got the sex / intimacy back on track. However the ultimatum was poorly timed since apparently she was going through a lot of other stuff too (when are they not?). So she got upset and wanted to end the arrangement. The problem is she actually had some feelings for me, which actually complicated a lot of things. Neither one of us knew exactly where the boundaries of our arrangement and friendship were. And she actually did have some feelings for me because even though our arrangement currently is over, we're still talking / txting everyday. She still wants to be friends and spend time together occasionally, but doesn't want an actual arrangement anymore. It's hard to say where things are going to go from here. Things might just eventually fizzle out or it could morph into a real relationship.

So these recent experiences did prompt me to sit back and think, The last couple of months I've spent a lot of time, energy, and money on sugar babies that is being taken away from the SO. If I was trying to truly fix my marriage, I wouldn't be doing this. I'm not trying to fix my marriage, I'm just trying to make it survivable. Like others have stated, the passion is gone from my marriage. My SO looked great when she was younger, but she was always lazy when it came to exercise. So when the kids came, it took a toll on her body which she never bothered to work on. Also she became a more angrier person over the years, which turned me off to her. But still, we do have a pretty good partnership and great kids, so I need to find a way to make it work for now. The sugar world has been a way for me to be content in my current marriage situation.

That said, another problem lately is that the better the sex has been getting in the sugar world, the frequency of the sex I'm having with the SO has gone down. My SO just lies there, never does oral, and etc. So it's hard to get up the desire for her compared to HYBs who go at it like sex fiends and more open to trying new things. I need to fix this though because this may end up being my undoing. Sex droughts with an SO like this can clue them in that an affair might be going on.

So without a doubt, while the sugar world is helping me survive the marriage, it is damaging my relationship with my SO. But I'm okay with this because my SO stopped trying to fix / improve our relationship long ago. So I've finally given up as well.

As for being stood-up, I've never been stood-up for a M&G. Primarily because I always confirm the morning of and then when I'm literally heading out the door to meet the person. So I've had cancellations, but I've never been stood-up because usually I catch it before hand. I tend to see 19-22 year-olds and girls at that age are notoriously flaky, so I know to always double confirm. Also some girls may just get too nervous, so I like to give them an opt-out before I waste my time driving and waiting.

**CantWinLosin** · 01-08-13 13:47

I think I've been amazingly lucky on this (knocking on wood.) I've only been stood up a couple times, and both times the girl texted me within a few minutes of the appointed time to apologize. One was a car breakdown, the other admitted to falling asleep. Shit happens; I'm not going to hold life's honest accidents against someone, but if I smell the stench of burning BS they won't get another chance.

I've had more that I wish hadn't showed up! . One that demonstrated the power of careful picture cropping (she didn't look large in the pic but when she showed up in was obvious she shopped for clothes in the Camping Equipment section at Dick's.) One that had THE nasal, whiny, fingernails-on-chalkboard voice from hell. And several that the IQ of an old BodArk fencepost.

**F Scott** · 01-08-13 11:25

"And the most interesting sentiment noted from our entries in general is that men are looking for more intimacy than they are getting at home. Contrary to popular opinion about players just wanting to score more sex, we are seeking love and affection, that meaningfulness to our relationships. The girls in the bowl, particularly the under 30 crowd, do not want intimacy. They are seeking excitement, new experiences, money, consumer goods, and are avoiding being tied down. What a reversal is it not?"

Thanks for the efforts here, Nando. I can't say I'm surprised by the results. It's an issue I've been battling with almost my entire time in the club, once I got past the astonishment that I could get a 20 yo into bed with me in the first place!

I am sitting at home with a bit of free time on my hands, unfortunately, since a baby I was going to meet this morning for coffee is apparently standing me up, again! This will be the last time I try and set something up with her, although she is so totally my type that I am crying just a little as I type this, but my new mantra for 2013 is "Onward." I am curious to hear, if I ever do, what her excuse is for not confirming with me this morning. I finally got smart and tell all new POTs that I will not head to our meeting place, in this case 30 mins away, unless I hear from them in the morning that we are still a "go."

The whole thing has made me think back on the many, and creative, excuses I have gotten from babies for missing their appointments. One of the more outlandish ones was "Sorry, but my dad got arrested for something really bad, and I had to go and bail him out"! Needless to say, there was no second meeting. I have also been told "I got into a serious car crash. I'll get in touch when I get out of the hospital." And this from a baby who was at the same moment logged into SA, which I could see since I also was. I guess she was typing using a pencil in her teeth!

So, I put the question to the brotherhood: what are some of the most outlandish, unbelievable excuses you have gotten for missing a rendezvous?

Onward,

Scott

**Hernando** · 01-07-13 17:44

Thanks for all the input guys.

It is interesting how many of us are in the same boat. The take home message for guys who aren't in the Sugar Bowl is.to read this blog before getting tied down, right?

The facts of life are twofold :

1) Genetics / hormones work against partnering for life

2) even the most exciting relationship / partner gets stale as the years wear on.

And the most interesting sentiment noted from our entries in general is that men are looking for more intimacy than they are getting at home. Contrary to popular opinion about players just wanting to score more sex, we are seeking love and affection, that meaningfulness to our relationships. The girls in the bowl, particularly the under 30 crowd, do not want intimacy. They are seeking excitement, new experiences, money, consumer goods, and are avoiding being tied down. What a reversal is it not?

**Novaguy2** · 01-07-13 14:08

I have been on SA for a month now and have not had too much success to share or write about. I hope that my luck will change soon. Any other suggestions beside SA in which others have had better success? I also noticed that SA has a SM section. Anyone every try or consider the SM route to supplement the SB stable you have?

**Magic Rat** · 01-07-13 14:05

This is a very timely and interesting topic. Yet another example of why this is the best thread on this site.

I too have a SO that seems to have lost the ability or desire for passion and intimacy. While I've always used the excuse of lack of same for jumping into the bowl, there is a lot of frustration there. I haven't seen my ATF in over two months and only 3-4 times in the last six months, so so much for the intimacy there. I subscribe to the theory that there is a finite amount of the 'Rat to go around so whatever is given to a baby, by definition takes away from the home front. It may be a fucked up theory, but if we really think about it, we are cutting our own throats at home with playing around with the babies. Again, my opinion.

Personally I would prefer the passion and intimacy coming from the SO, but due to whatever reasons, I've pretty much given up on that. Even when things were normal with the ATF, we would get together once or twice a month and that was fine with me. While not eliminating the desire at home, it did relieve the frustration knowing that someone cared about you and wanted to be intimate. I think we all need a little reinforcement at times, especially those of us who are getting a little up in years. As I've said before, I really haven't had much luck with the really young babies. My ATF is only about a decade younger than me, and her sugar requirement ceased a long time ago so I'm probably not the norm here. It definitely made this old guy feel pretty damn good when we did get together as it was only because we enjoyed each others company rather than her needing Christmas money or whatever.

I have been seeing a civie gal lately, mostly for drinks with a couple of visits to the FC. Like most babies I've ever met, there is a lot of baggage that comes with this one as well, which of course enters into the relationship. Between her and the ATF, the 'Rat is pretty much worn out emotionally with the effort involved, so I'm not really interested in adding to the baby total at this point. We've talked a lot on here about effort and reward, and I'm presently not prepared to put in the effort.

As a final note regarding the wiping ass question, I asked my new civie gal if she would change my diapers when I got to that point. Her reply was that was a wife's job, and if we were married she most definitely would. Not exactly sure how to take that, so I'll probably just let that one die a natural death.

**F Scott** · 01-07-13 11:37

Gentlemen,

Like many of us, I assume, I got into The Bowl for a variety of reasons, not the least being that I was not getting something I needed at home, and I am not referring to merely sex. I have been married more than 30 years, and at present have a "working relationship" with my SO, and by that I mean that there is genuine affection and love, but no passion to speak of. As I say to any baby who asks why I am doing this, I reply "I'm not ready to be old just yet."

For me, these relationships offer a chance to be Peter Pan for just a bit longer, and to be with someone who thinks, or pretends to think, I'm fun and interesting, and who wants to fuck me, (or pretends to want to LOL!)

I don't think my adventures have created a different dynamic for me at home, but I do confess to having sporadic panic attacks when I imagine that I have left tracks that my SO could discover. So far, so good, though there have been a few close calls, mostly involving misplacing the batphone, or an imprudent written list of names and appointments on my dresser. Fortunately there are so many other scraps of paper that it was a case of hiding in plain sight, but still. Yikes!

For me, the biggest issue is the amount of effort it sometimes takes to set up an FC visit, especially if it involves a motel. This may be why I have more luck, and more fun, on the road, when the whole room question is taken care of.

As for the emotional component, in thinking back, when I was in the Happy Place with my last ATF, and getting the emotional connection I was missing in real life, I remember that I felt far less deprived at home, since I was getting that need met from my baby. As things stand now, I am more discontent at home than I had been, and I think now this is why I am seeking more than a hook-up out of The Bowl. Simply a spirited fucking does not seem to be hard for me to achieve. It is the "something more" that is the more challenging aspect.

Hope this all makes some sense. I am making arrangements for the coming week, and have Bond Baby, the one with the boyfriend / husband, inked in for the entire afternoon on Wednesday, this time at a hotel! She has requested champagne for a refreshment, and I am excited to see her again. We have unfinished business!

Peace,

Scott

**Zomby** · 01-06-13 12:03