Thread: EMP (European Massage Parlor) Reports
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Yesterday 21:31 #3743Senior Member

Posts: 201Maria in Schaumburg
Tried this booker recently at a Schaumburg area apartment: https://chicago.bedpage.com/Escorts/.../13283775.html.
Had a very overpriced but pleasant experience with Maria. She's Ukrainian, I'd say maybe 30 years old. Hard to tell. Nice fit body. Small natural tits. A few minutes of back massage then flip and immediately started stroking me off. Not a lot of teasing or buildup with her technique, but I did appreciate that she took direction well and allowed me to fuck her tits, which a lot of these girls will not allow. The base fee for 30 minutes was two Benjamins then the little head took over and I paid for a $150 upsell to suck and fuck her tits.
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03-11-26 20:15 #3742Senior Member

Posts: 256I can't stand the jackhammer technique. And I've been to some places where even if you ask them to slow down, they either don't listen / ignore you or they slow down for a second and then right back to jackhammer. Sorry had to vent after seeing your post LOL.
Originally Posted by MattNagy
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03-11-26 00:04 #3741Regular Member

Posts: 10Olympia (noble square girls)
Saw Olympia with the old noble square agency last week when CLM fell through. Pictures were vague but directionally accurate, late 20's early 30's dirty blonde / brunette Russian model type. Skinny with wide hips and big D cub naturals.
She asked for $200 for level 1 with underwear on then wanted $100 upcharge for mutual touch (LOL) - I was just ready to get a nut off so I paid up for basic L1. The massage on the back was. Fine, she had some training but not very enthusiastic (which is a theme). On the flip, she definitely knew what she was doing with a more erotic, frenulum plus boys working type massage. Being a degenerate I actually prefer a build to a jackhammering vs. Teasing erotic but if that's more your speed maybe its worth the trouble (if you can negotiate better than me).
They're still located near Damen / Milwaukee / north, despite all the shortcomings its hard to beat the convenience. Booker is responsive and got her ready within about 90 minutes of outreach.
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02-04-26 21:22 #3740Senior Member

Posts: 201Leena Ukrainian
Tried this one recently and got "Leena". Nice thin cute Ukrainian, probably 20-something. I suspect her tits are fake but they're a nice sight either way. Two Benjamins for a 30 minute session with her just wearing a thong. Touching was another Bennie upsell. I declined and just enjoyed the view. Her technique was kind of too cute for me, too sensual as odd as that may sound. I want to get jacked off, I don't want my dick treated like a pottery sculpting project. Eventually I just took over to blow the load because the way she was working me wasn't really getting me to the top of the mountain. YMMV.
Really doubt I will repeat anytime soon just because of the price. But I can't really complain about the experience itself, after all it's a beautiful woman playing with your Willy.
https://chicago.bedpage.com/Bodyrubs.../13307902.html
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01-08-26 22:41 #3739Senior Member

Posts: 541Donna / Irene's
If I recall Donna did agree to a tug but she wasn't particular good looking and the tug was nothing special. Nina was the hottest and Olga was attractive as well (but bitchy) and I never got anything from either of them despite 3-4 visits each to build trust and rapport. Kudos to those who did get some action. I have had a euro who took a solid year of regular visits before she got comfortable providing just L1 but I never had that kind of patience at Irene's.
Originally Posted by ChgoGuySouth
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As I posted before my last visit was a borderline criminal rip-off so I swore I would never go back.
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01-07-26 15:44 #3738Senior Member

Posts: 237Irene's
To be honest, yeah I've hit paydirt here and I've gotten all of them waaaay out of their comfort zones including B (miss her). I wish some have done more.
Originally Posted by Chiguyxxx
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In all circumstances where I really, really struck gold here, it look me at least 10 months of bi weekly or once a month appointments.
In those cases I was fantastically surprised. But my point in my original post was how bad this place is now. She hasn't hired any new blood in forever.
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12-26-25 20:01 #3737Senior Member

Posts: 87Olga
Olga went independant for awhile, she is the queen of tease! IF she really likes you, you'll be happy. Otherwise, its self service and she likes to watch. Heard she was back at Irenes a couple years ago.
Originally Posted by ChgoGuySouth
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12-26-25 19:42 #3736Senior Member

Posts: 360Dinna
Haven't been to Irenes in years but I bet Donna is still there.
Originally Posted by JesusCollins
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12-23-25 18:12 #3735Senior Member

Posts: 541Irene's
No, I initially went to see Nina on the advice of an other monfer and despite a couple of excellent massages I never got HE (all I need). This was after Nina left / retired an I figured why not see what's what. Owner is a big tall heavy lady isn't shoe? This was one of her staff. Average size and looks. Nothing memorable like Nina's wonderful figure. I can't remember the name for sure but I think it was Marta. Unprofessional, arrived late, shorted time and in the end she was a thief. Owner offered to refund the stolen $50 but it left such a bad taste in my mouth it's not about the money. I'd gladly pay more for a quality experience. Just don't want to risk another bad experience there.
Originally Posted by JesusCollins
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12-23-25 09:07 #3734Senior Member

Posts: 237Irene
Oh yeah, I think that may have been the owner.
Originally Posted by ZzTopSterZz
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12-22-25 12:54 #3733Senior Member

Posts: 151Irenes
I haven't been in ages. It was a decent massage when I went but no extras despite a little bit of semi-teasing. It was always kinda amusing how she would leave IMMEDIATELY as she said she was finished with the massage. Like by the time the last word was out of her mouth, the door was closing behind her. If I just want a decent vanilla massage might was well go to Heavenly Massage.
Originally Posted by JesusCollins
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12-20-25 15:46 #3732Senior Member

Posts: 541Maria's
And while talking about the old days, anyone been to Maria's in the past year?
Originally Posted by ZzTopSterZz
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12-20-25 11:42 #3731Senior Member

Posts: 541Irene's
My last experience there was awful. You couldn’t pay me to go back. I posted about it. Dm me if you want more.
Originally Posted by JesusCollins
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12-16-25 10:30 #3730Senior Member

Posts: 237Irene's
Does anyone even still go to this place? Irene used to text me every so often and that's even stopped.
Curious.
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12-15-25 14:59 #3729Senior Member

Posts: 215Mila / Alice with Noble Square booker
Booker sent me fake pictures that they used a couple of years ago, but they told me Mila was new, so I took a chance. I was surprised to see Alice open the door. She's 5'4", dirty blonde now, tattoos, and a nose ring. She's put on a tiny bit of weight, but her body is still 10/10. Less super tight teenager and more slightly curvy girl next door, but her tits are still incredible. B-cup, large puffy nipples, and improbably perky.
Alice / Mila hasn't improved her massage technique since I saw her last year, so I got the same sit-on-my-legs-while-rubbing-her-hands-on-my-back thing. The body slide is still incredible, though. On the flip, I feasted on her incredible tits, fondled her juicy ass, and rubbed her pussy as she stroked me. She then straddled me in the 69 position and let me touch her pussy while she stroked me. When I told her I was close, she sat up simulated rcg while she finished me.
The Good: Alice / Mila is very pretty. Face is 8/10, and body is still 10/10. Her finish was better this time, and I'll never get tired of feasting on those amazing tits.
The Bad: Still overpriced, even for an incredibly beautiful girl like Alice / Mila. I opted for the full hour + fully nude + mutual touch for 370, and it's honestly ridiculous that doesn't include DFK and DATY.
Still, I had a good time, and I'll keep using this service. I guess suckers like me is why they can keep their prices so high. Alice / Mila is here until Thursday (make sure you ask for Mila).
A few ads with the number I've been using to book:
https://chicago.trystpage.com/female...33017614766080
https://harlothub.com/united-states/...158862101.html
https://springfieldil.bedpage.com/Es.../23371071.html








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