Massage Parlor Reports

[Anon2854]

Anyone have info on Asian Massage Therapy in Farmington on Grand River? I was ready to TOFTT but just found out they take credit cards. Thoughts?

[Anon2854]

Good sign: 90 year old rickety wood structure with hand painted plywood sign that says " Massage Here".

Honestly, having no sign at all is a good sign too. These places aren't exactly winning chamber of commerce awards.

[MichiganGuy30]

Have an appointment for Saturday morning but interestingly she said she is in Redford Township. On her Wix account it shows she is in Southfield. I hope it is the same person. I am confirming with her Saturday at 8 am and she will send the address then.

Anyone been to her Redford Township place? Is it safe?

It's not a bad neighborhood at all. Not sure I would want to hang out there at night, (anything within a 30 mile radius of Detroit is not my kinda place anyway) but no issues during the day, I was just there today. Hehe.

[SzGino]

Have an appointment for Saturday morning but interestingly she said she is in Redford Township. On her Wix account it shows she is in Southfield. I hope it is the same person. I am confirming with her Saturday at 8 am and she will send the address then.

Anyone been to her Redford Township place? Is it safe?

[ED Pills]

Also, probably worth mentioning, in addition to reading reviews on monger sites, here are some things I do to assess a place:

Red flags for a straight up massage place:

- Website with custom domain and design that looks like it cost money.

- Pics that show a clean place and decor.

- Any indication they take credit cards.

- Any reference to a name of an owner.

- A list of various services offered with a range of prices. Like "pedicure $30, hot stone $80, facial peel $50" etc etc. Ideally you want to see no price listed at all or 2 prices: 1 hr, 1 hhr.

- links to social profiles and social profiles that look "current" and "normal". Preferably no social at all.

- check reviews on google. A lot of places you want will have not have many reviews at all. Many will have poor reviews. If you see 50,5 star rating, mostly women, reviews, it's not the place for you. If you see a 2. 5 star rating with all of the women complaining about rude staff, overpriced and disgusting place. You might be on the right track.

- any kind of groupon deals.

- promoting couples massages


Good signs:

- atrocious english on website.

- when answering the phone you can barely understand them and they don't even say hi, just mumble some shit like you called them at home and they just woke up.

- horrendous website with random domain like happymassage.geocities.whatever. Terrible english on the website. Stock images of random asian women. Any reference to "new management" (they ALL say there's new management).

- you know how they always have shelving with towels, lotion etc? If you see a pic with a pillow on the shelf and preferably as much of the following as possible: lotion and oil, kleenex, paper towel. That's a good thing.

These aren't all laws of nature but in my experience, these tend to hold true much of the time. Curious what others might add to this or disagree with.

Good sign: 90 year old rickety wood structure with hand painted plywood sign that says " Massage Here".

[Vajuxo]

Along the lines of how to tell whether a parlor is strictly legit or at least offers a friendly handshake, there are those providers that run the 'notorious ads", BBBJ, 69 etc.

My favorite "service" on the notorious ads is, "Drain you balls", LOL.

[SamPerkins420]

Great list, love it! I certainly look for similar things. New Girls language of course the most obvious. Low # of Google reviews is usually a good sign, esp if any are from males and mention keywords like happy or relaxing.

I also like going onto Google Maps street view and looking at the place. Covered windows = good sign. Windows you can see through, and things like massage, nail or hair chairs = not what we're looking for.

I also do the same browsing escorts as far back as the Craigslist days. Easiest one there is looking for pics in cheap hotel rooms.

Also, probably worth mentioning, in addition to reading reviews on monger sites, here are some things I do to assess a place:

Red flags for a straight up massage place:

- Website with custom domain and design that looks like it cost money.

- Pics that show a clean place and decor.

- Any indication they take credit cards.

- Any reference to a name of an owner.

- A list of various services offered with a range of prices. Like "pedicure $30, hot stone $80, facial peel $50" etc etc. Ideally you want to see no price listed at all or 2 prices: 1 hr, 1 hhr.

- links to social profiles and social profiles that look "current" and "normal". Preferably no social at all..

[Eaton Beaver]

Don't forget "New Girls". They always advertise new girls for as long as I can remember. As far back as the ads in the sports section of the local rag. Even with the same old sea hags on staff.

[Anon2854]

Ha, Tantra is owned by Aveda Corporation. I'll let you do the math.

Also, probably worth mentioning, in addition to reading reviews on monger sites, here are some things I do to assess a place:

Red flags for a straight up massage place:

- Website with custom domain and design that looks like it cost money.

- Pics that show a clean place and decor.

- Any indication they take credit cards.

- Any reference to a name of an owner.

- A list of various services offered with a range of prices. Like "pedicure $30, hot stone $80, facial peel $50" etc etc. Ideally you want to see no price listed at all or 2 prices: 1 hr, 1 hhr.

- links to social profiles and social profiles that look "current" and "normal". Preferably no social at all.

- check reviews on google. A lot of places you want will have not have many reviews at all. Many will have poor reviews. If you see 50,5 star rating, mostly women, reviews, it's not the place for you. If you see a 2. 5 star rating with all of the women complaining about rude staff, overpriced and disgusting place. You might be on the right track.

- any kind of groupon deals.

- promoting couples massages


Good signs:

- atrocious english on website.

- when answering the phone you can barely understand them and they don't even say hi, just mumble some shit like you called them at home and they just woke up.

- horrendous website with random domain like happymassage.geocities.whatever. Terrible english on the website. Stock images of random asian women. Any reference to "new management" (they ALL say there's new management).

- you know how they always have shelving with towels, lotion etc? If you see a pic with a pillow on the shelf and preferably as much of the following as possible: lotion and oil, kleenex, paper towel. That's a good thing.

These aren't all laws of nature but in my experience, these tend to hold true much of the time. Curious what others might add to this or disagree with.

[Anon2854]

Long time lurker, first time poster. Anyone have any intel on tantra spa in Ferndale and if they offer any extras?

Ha, Tantra is owned by Aveda Corporation. I'll let you do the math.

[Wally2822]

Thanks to all for the Carla reviews. Will avoid.

Toothiest and most painful BJ I ever received. Avoid and spend your $ elsewhere.

[SamSmith4568]

Anyone have any info on her? I messaged her on IG and said she is in a private home in Detroit. Want to find out a little more before I schedule.

https://instagram.com/dominique_mariee_

[BAezzy411]

Long time lurker, first time poster. Anyone have any intel on tantra spa in Ferndale and if they offer any extras?

[Anon2854]

Check your msgs Amotes. Good hunting.

Ha, same here to Amotes. Sounds like he'll have plenty to read in his msgs.

[Fasted2010]

I travel to Southfield few time a month and looking for a good AMP. TIA! I'm from the Chicago area so if I can provide any recommendations this way, let me know.

Check your msgs Amotes. Good hunting.