Massage Parlor Reports

[JamesBlond007]

I had occasion to crack a nut, and was watching all the chatter about Zina go by, so I thought I'd see if I could get an appt. I texted her early for a later viewing, and she responded about 10 minutes later, and we're on. Zina could be put under the escort section. The 1st half is a "massage" ending with a hot towel, but you end up on a bed, so if it walks like a duck? Just a thought.

Anyway, she's based in McLean, but kind of in the pretty much still Tysons area. Nice looking apt complex. I text her when arrive, and she leads me up to her place, where the door is cracked open. I pop in and give her a hug as she closes the door behind. Now, if you see her ad, she's not whatever Kpop model's picture she used. Think Missi Pyle, only with dark features. But she's a spinner, for sure, in a black silky tube-top dress. She asks for the donation, 220 says I? 240. Oh. Well, lucky for me, I usually bring an extra 20, they must be getting wise to me. Her room is a massage table and a bed, all in red lighting.

She leads me to a shower, which is a little screwed up, doesn't really turn off. While showing me in, a benji falls from her bra. Now, I know that we're in a business realtionship here, but at least give me the fantasy illusion that I'm your only customer today. Strike 1. Out of the shower, she gives a so-so AMP tier "massage", which is more sensual oil rubbing with no real teasing. Whatever, its not why I came here. It goes on for almost exactly 30 min. She queefs a few times. We laugh it off, but strike 2. Trying really hard not to imagine the previous guy's dick space getting pushed out. She hot towels me, and she motions for the bed. OK, so things are about to get fun. She starts unpeeling the dress from the top, some nice cees, and pulls the panties down (dress stays on).

I'm not sure if I'm what you'd call a "connoisseur" of the craft here, but I've noticed at times when patronizing the local war effort that there are times when, despite appearances, they're really kind of phoning it in. For example, there's a style of blowjobbery that consists of a lot of noise, and lots of head movement, some sucking but it's like watching one of those girls who thinks whipping her hair around while she dances is going to do something magical to attract a mate in the wild. The best BJ I've ever had was very matter of fact and business-like in execution, and this was just ok, for a BBBJ. Odd part is when I pulled out of her mouth, I felt a tingle like she had been sucking on a mint before I went in. Ladies, don't do that please. I went down on her, but she didn't know enough to tilt her hips up so I won't dislocate my jaw trying to get to the goods. Mercifully, it didn't last all that long.

We make our way onto the bed, and cover me Porkins, I'm going in. Working at a chub factor of about 80%, it's almost work. She's putting on a decent show, but it looks like it's a little work for her too, even with my best moves. Maybe its a chemistry thing. Eventually we both get tired of it and I finish in her mouth. She offers another shower, but goes first, so I get to sit there in a half-wet towel waiting my turn. I shower as best I can, but I swear I still smell like her when I leave. I get dressed, get a bottle of water, and she has some weird Buddhist chant music going on in her kitchen, like she's cleansing the evil from the air or something. Peace out.

Other guys seem to have had more success, but for me it was just "meh". Depends on what you like. Want to whet your wick in Tysons? Massage and FS, there are plenty of better options at that price point, IMHO.

[TropicanGeorge]

Lately I've been seeing ads for Reston W, which I thought had been closed. Has anyone made a trip out here to see if the reopening is legit / any good?

[Anonymous Too]

Pine Tree (located between the renowned home of Linda, and the less exciting Garden).

Yes, I figured out the location. Thanks.

I hadn't seen too many additional reviews on this spot and was hoping to trigger that. There seem to be a bunch on the Rmaps, but behind the pay wall.

[Mr Underhill]

Trying to learn the ropes and research this option. All other reviews of "Pine" mostly refer to spots in Herndon or Woodbridge. Would anyone have some insight on this one in Fairfax? Thank you kindly.

Pine Tree (located between the renowned home of Linda, and the less exciting Garden).

[Cbsbb]

Made my 3rd trip to Massage Oasis in Gainesville. Sadly it seems either you can get a great massage or great everything else but not both. They are legit, and I made the mistake second time asking for HE to which I got a stern "this is a professional establishment" from the super cute girl who massaged me with another lady. (The four hands had me right and ready).

I just wanted to report if you ever just need a real good legit massage 6 for an HR is a great deal and since nothing else going on they are fine with a 2 tip.

I'm a Fredericksburg monger but lurk here sometimes for ideas whenever I am further North.

Stay safe out there.

[Anonymous Too]

Working from home since COVID I haven't been out to the Fairfax cluster that often, but I had the chance the other day, others were booked so I took a flutter on Pine Tree, where I haven't been since tiny Susan was there.

The door was opened by a petite (5'0" max) lady with a short bobbed do, in a little black number, short skirt, bare shoulders and (from my vantage point) acceptable assets peeking out of the top. Name sounded like Kani.

Table shower was promising. Back to room, usual break as she preps the shower room for the next client.

From the start of the massage, this is quite special. Kani moves to my head, steps in close so she is pressing against the top of my head, and leans forward to work my back, her whole body resting against me. My satisfied grunts prompt her to go to the next stage and reach farther down, and to do this she hops up to the table, knees either side of my face, and what I by now suspect is an unclothed kitty pressing rhythmically and intentionally on my head.

This takes us, more quickly than usual, to what do I want extra.

So now Kani has her topped pulled down and her skirt up and the assets are revealed as firm natural-feeling Bs caressing my ass and my back, interspersed with light butt-kisses and hand-play from the rearmost point to Underhill the Younger, while I roll slightly to give her access and reach Kani's erogenous regions (clean and smooth with a little black tuft). Now I flip and the dress comes off completely and her thighs open to admit my hand, squeezing and probing. And in moments Kani seems to be getting into the spirit of the thing, judging by the wetness issuing from one orifice and the top-C Queen Of The Night squeals from another, as she pumps enthusiastically.

Kani cums. If it's fake it's Oscar-quality. She's almost limp as I ease her on to the table, we embrace and I kiss her body, and she wraps her thighs around my leg and squeezes, still stroking me, until the time has come. She lights down to the floor and focuses full manual and oral attention on the Younger, bringing me quickly to a state of grace.

As I leave, the other lady on duty sticks her head out to say hi (maybe curious as to the reasons for the sounds emanating from room 3) and she isn't bad-looking either. But I think my next appointment will be dedicated to re-enacting Song of Solomon 7:2 with this little treasure.

(Hour fee + .9 for those counting.).

Meow!

Trying to learn the ropes and research this option. All other reviews of "Pine" mostly refer to spots in Herndon or Woodbridge. Would anyone have some insight on this one in Fairfax? Thank you kindly.

[TheDrowned]

Tired of the AMPs, I tried contacting and setting appointment with this provider. She was admit about gift card for payment and said she could see me right away. As I got into my car I wanted to voice verify before driving to fairfax. She wouldn't pick up both times I called. I had just texted her, so I know her phone was working and near to her because she replies. Saw that as a red flag and aborted mission. See if she follows through with you. Would love a non-Asian massage and tug provider.

She's about as attractive as a bowl of corn flakes. Admittedly, white chicks aren't my fancy, but not accepting cash and only wanting a gift card and payment up front is scamming 101 but if you're going to scam why not have a stronger lure? This one's a head scratcher.

[LowKey12]

She's not exactly the usual fare used by uncle to lure in unwary hobbyists.

I do agree that her plain looks could be used to trick people into sending payment to a scammer, though.

Google the first pic. It has been used in other ads outside of DC. Gift cards are 100% scam. Stop falling for this. Are people that desperate?

[Mr Underhill]

Working from home since COVID I haven't been out to the Fairfax cluster that often, but I had the chance the other day, others were booked so I took a flutter on Pine Tree, where I haven't been since tiny Susan was there.

The door was opened by a petite (5'0" max) lady with a short bobbed do, in a little black number, short skirt, bare shoulders and (from my vantage point) acceptable assets peeking out of the top. Name sounded like Kani.

Table shower was promising. Back to room, usual break as she preps the shower room for the next client.

From the start of the massage, this is quite special. Kani moves to my head, steps in close so she is pressing against the top of my head, and leans forward to work my back, her whole body resting against me. My satisfied grunts prompt her to go to the next stage and reach farther down, and to do this she hops up to the table, knees either side of my face, and what I by now suspect is an unclothed kitty pressing rhythmically and intentionally on my head.

This takes us, more quickly than usual, to what do I want extra.

So now Kani has her topped pulled down and her skirt up and the assets are revealed as firm natural-feeling Bs caressing my ass and my back, interspersed with light butt-kisses and hand-play from the rearmost point to Underhill the Younger, while I roll slightly to give her access and reach Kani's erogenous regions (clean and smooth with a little black tuft). Now I flip and the dress comes off completely and her thighs open to admit my hand, squeezing and probing. And in moments Kani seems to be getting into the spirit of the thing, judging by the wetness issuing from one orifice and the top-C Queen Of The Night squeals from another, as she pumps enthusiastically.

Kani cums. If it's fake it's Oscar-quality. She's almost limp as I ease her on to the table, we embrace and I kiss her body, and she wraps her thighs around my leg and squeezes, still stroking me, until the time has come. She lights down to the floor and focuses full manual and oral attention on the Younger, bringing me quickly to a state of grace.

As I leave, the other lady on duty sticks her head out to say hi (maybe curious as to the reasons for the sounds emanating from room 3) and she isn't bad-looking either. But I think my next appointment will be dedicated to re-enacting Song of Solomon 7:2 with this little treasure.

(Hour fee + .9 for those counting.).

Meow!

[Bunker Buster]

The fact that she won't take cash is a huge red flag for me.

I can't help but wonder whether this is a fake ad or, worse yet, a set-up by our least favorite uncle.

She's not exactly the usual fare used by uncle to lure in unwary hobbyists.

I do agree that her plain looks could be used to trick people into sending payment to a scammer, though.

[Old Chinese Guy]

Came across this ad today, didn't see any reviews.

Anyone have any info on the experience or am I going to have to TOFTT.

https://nova.bedpage.com/Bodyrubs/no.../21049055.html

The fact that she won't take cash is a huge red flag for me.

I can't help but wonder whether this is a fake ad or, worse yet, a set-up by our least favorite uncle.

Have to say that not accepting cash is a little odd but unlikely to be your unfavorite uncle. Ad is clear she's an LMT and gives only professional massage (right in the title). In fact she emphasizes in the ad that she's licensed and certified. The only hint of anything more than a professional massage are words such as 'tantric', 'vibrant sensations' and 'sensual' none of which in the least implies anything sexual. I think she's legit, you will probably get a real massage and if really lucky and you ask, maybe a HE for more money. But I wouldn't expect that. TOFTT and report back.

[Rhinopole]

After seeing several good reviews I visited Queen in Franconia today. I was hoping to see Kim, June, or the other lady who got good reviews. But I drew Penny. There may have been a language problem, but I'm not sure. I told her I'd stay one hour and gave her a Benjamin and she said she give me change. That was all good. Then she asked if I wanted to stay 1/2 hour. I repeated 1 hour but gave her the choice if she only had limited time. She got kind of pissy and I figured the negative vibes that were starting to build weren't worth it and I decided to go elsewhere. So it may turn out that I missed a great session with Penny, but just thought I'd report this to the group. If I go to Queen again, I'll make sure who is available.

Rhino.

[Tom McAn]

Came across this ad today, didn't see any reviews.

Anyone have any info on the experience or am I going to have to TOFTT.

https://nova.bedpage.com/Bodyrubs/no.../21049055.html

The fact that she won't take cash is a huge red flag for me.

I can't help but wonder whether this is a fake ad or, worse yet, a set-up by our least favorite uncle.

[Salkal4201]

Stopped by for a "lovely" time in sterling. First time at this place. Greeted at the door by what she said her name was Jenny. Beautiful lady, I'd say in her early 40's. Large C to a small D up top. To be honest, I was really suprised at how hot she was. I opted of the whole hr for. 8. I shed my eartly belongings and she led me to the TS. By far the best TS I've ever had. She spread the cheeks and got in there for a deep cleaning. Filped and damn near popped when she was washing the front. She was very thorough to say the least. Stood up and she helped me dry off while still being very playful. Then to the massage, asked for medium pressure. Top notch on the massage, she must have a thing for the crack because she massaged there really well without asking. I was just along for the ride. After the massage, before the flip she did some finger tip play on my back. Reached down and grabbed the boys and reached uo under me and grabbed the mainnman and massaged them both at the same time. Again I didn't ask, just along for the ride. On the filp she went right to work. I asked could I touch she said, yes. Asked to see her goods and she pulled out the girls. I grabbed a couple hand fulls and finished. Probably could of negotiated more but I my light switch was already turned on by seeing how hot she was. I tipped $ because everything was a great experience and I had a great time. I got up, she gave me a hug and slapped me on the ass and told me to come back and see her. Which I will.

[Member #6917]

Came across this ad today, didn't see any reviews.

Anyone have any info on the experience or am I going to have to TOFTT.

https://nova.bedpage.com/Bodyrubs/no.../21049055.html

Tired of the AMPs, I tried contacting and setting appointment with this provider. She was admit about gift card for payment and said she could see me right away. As I got into my car I wanted to voice verify before driving to fairfax. She wouldn't pick up both times I called. I had just texted her, so I know her phone was working and near to her because she replies. Saw that as a red flag and aborted mission. See if she follows through with you. Would love a non-Asian massage and tug provider.