"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[Dolato]

I'm ecstatic because I got this relationship exactly where I want it and we're clicking very well.

Congrats on getting the sugar aspect all set up. Seems like work to work in the gifts, but kudos for getting it to work.

I wanted to ask, do you keep track of how much you're spending on cash and gifts and try to keep it to a certain amount?

[John G Smith]

Well I'm feeling on cloud 9 right now.

A couple of days ago, my CL Teacher SB and I were figuring out our schedules and what days to meet. She said she had Wednesday and Thursday free. I told her I had Wednesday completely free, but her gift that I got her wouldn't arrive until Thursday, which I had a tight schedule that day. So she suggested we meet both days! So the first day we relaxed and had a great sex romp, and I didn't pay a single penny and she was completely fine with it since she knew she was getting something the next day. The second day we metup briefly and I give her the gifts which she absolutely loved, then we proceeded to have another great sex romp. It was great having her offer to have sex without anything tied to it and then more sex after she got the gift the next day.

I'm ecstatic because I got this relationship exactly where I want it and we're clicking very well. She never asks me for money, but she's very appreciative when I do give her money and gifts. The money / gifts don't even have to be tied to specific visits. We can have sex without a money / gift exchange on a given night. But in return I sometimes send her money without direct sex involved. She has a boyfriend, so I don't have to worry about things getting too intense emotionally. At least for now, things are in great balance. She can be a little flaky sometimes, but she has gotten much better with communicating with me on schedule changes. And the few times she does flake, it helps my budget a bit. So we're in a good spot right now and it's pretty much the near perfect SB relationship I'm looking for.

My little blonde Personal Assistant is on vacation so it was great timing to have sex back-to-back with my CL Teacher SB.

[John G Smith]

Everyone here has been spot on with their advice.

Unless you've reached the escape velocity where your relationship has become capable of being more than a typical SD / SB arrangement, then she will most certainly feel devalued or disrespected with lowering the allowance. Every time I've lowered the allowance noticeably, usually things ended shortly after or the sexual performance degraded significantly. In fact, that's how I usually end things by having her "break-up" with me by lowering the allowance or claim financial troubles.

As already been pointed out, if you're trying to keep a SB, you're better off just reducing the frequency instead of lowering the allowance. You can either do it silently by having a "schedule conflict" when you normally meet. Or you can do it directly and tell her you're having a little bit of a financial bump in the road. Sometimes she may offer to see you for less allowance, but you should let her bring it up, not you.

One thing that hasn't been discussed yet, if you can, try to avoid set allowance amounts in the first place. If it's not set in stone that you give her $200 every visit, then it's easier to give differing amounts (within reason) without her feeling something is wrong. What I do is try to have a mix of cash and gifts. With my CL Teacher SB I gave her a GreenDot card, so I can randomly send her money. Sometimes out of the blue I'll just send her $50 for dinner or whatever. I also get her gifts that look valuable but I got good deals on. All of this muddles the exact allowance I give her and everything isn't tied to $ per visit. It's more organic, where I do nice things for her and she does nice things for me over the course of the month. Obviously it takes the right kind of girl, but this can work with Long-Term SBs and you can quietly make budget adjustments without her even feeling it.

[Dandy Don]

[deleted by admin]
editor's note: this report was edited to remove references to **** persons.

i am aware that the vast majority of references to **** girls are legitimate attempts to warn other fellow members about how easy it is to accidentally pickup an **** girls, the potential dangers of being caught with **** girls, etc. however, past discussions in the forum has repeatedly demonstrated that the subject simply cannot be discussed intelligently, in any form or for any reason, without being misinterpreted, and without starting flame wars.

please do not post references to **** persons in the forum. thanks!

[FotoGuy1970]

Had a second overnight date with my SDT SB last night. She definitely put more effort into the areas that I had expressed disappointment with in our first date. At this point, she is my only SB and she said that she's not seeing any other guys, but sometimes it's hard to tell with these girls, no matter how genuine they seem. She's a very sweet girl, almost shy, and very easy to talk to. She definitely has "girl next door" written all over her. Not sure if this is a regular thing or what. I'm still looking around on SA until my membership lapses once again at the end of the month.

[BamBam]

You guys have come up with the same analysis as I have. Any cut is going to be viewed as demeaning and disrespectful. I am going to follow the suggestions in the following way: 1) Cut the high-priced SB's back to once a month. 2) Explain that I am stretched thin by a child starting college in the Fall, some overdue repairs at home and some bad investments. (I am retired and they know I am relying on investment income versus a job.) Over time, I will stretch out the gap between meetings. If they call asking me to see them, I will explain I only have the lower amount available and didn't want to insult them by asking for a discount. (Some of them call or text me frequently asking when we can meet.) They can then either agree to the lower amount or they can cut *me* loose. This gives me the option of going back to them and offering the original amount if my circumstances change. I feel comfortable with this approach. I know I am lucky to have this kind of problem and expect the world will turn someday.

RB.

P.S. CVG is the airport designation for the Cincinnati / Northern Kentucky airport. It derives from the nearest city which is Covington, KY.

[DirtyDeeds38]

I'm not sure what the exact playing field is like in Cincinnati, but if POTs are saying yes to $, then why not let your current roster know that due to some financial issues with your work / business, you can now only offer them $ rather than $$. Start with the SB you'd be least regretful about losing and worst case she leaves you can work to replace her with a $ SB. Then do the same with the next SB until you're at $ with all the SBs that you're seeing. There may be drama, and some or even all may leave when the sugar is cut in half. Just keep in mind this is a hobby for your enjoyment and 2 x the sessions is definitely more enjoyable.

I used to travel to this area on business weekly up until about five months ago. Cincinnati, Cleveland, Flint, MI. Detroit all up in through Ohio and Michigan were hit hardest by the recession. We are talking 20-30% unemployment throughout this region with no end in sight. My point? There is a plethora of young desperate women all through this region unlike anywhere else in the US, I believe. Problem is when I was traveling these areas I was oblivious to this whole sugar bowl thing. I was going with pros and they were EVERYWHERE, Semi-pros, young women needing food, rent paid, utilities, etc. So when I discovered the sugar bowl, first place I looked was up through that area of the country and on the sites there is a huge overflow of young single mothers, and true SB's willing to meet for a low premium. Only problem is, I'm not traveling that way anytime soon. Sure wish I was!

[FeelGoodMd]

I was contacted by a POT on SA who lives in St. Louis, saying she liked my profile and is "very submissive. " 24 yo, 5'2", above average looks, but no stunner (and not a spinner). I am no where near MO, and want local girls (she's not my type, anyhow), but I offered to pass along her contact info if anyone "in the community" was interested. She took me up on the offer, so if anyone wants her info (all I have is her SA profile number, but I'm sure she'd give me more if I asked), PM me.

[JZLizard]

First, what is CVG?

Abbreviation for Cincinatti / North KY area.

[FredMoore]

I am a first-time poster here. I am about halfway through the thread of old posts. I have been working the SD / SB websites in Cincinnati for about 3-4 months. I have a good profile and opening message. I am also having a fairly surprising degree of success (for a married, 60 yo, overweight guy.) In part, my success may be due in part to being overly generous in the beginning. I have been offering $$ per session and typically have sessions lasting 2 hours. After getting friendly in the FC with three different SB's I decided I could sympathetically turn away new offers by lowering my allowance to $. That hasn't worked as some hot-looking and appealing SB's are saying Yes. My problem now is that I really like the SB's I am seeing but my budget is going to limit me to 5-7 sessions per month. If I cut the cost per session in half, I can have twice as many sessions.

I have wrestled with this and I don't see a practical path to reducing my existing SB's allowances without creating some serious drama. Has anybody else found a way to do this? Next, if I do find myself having to cut off some SB's, who are wonderful in every way but price, how do I do it without being a complete asshole? I know I am talking bird-in-the-hand versus bird-in-the-Bush scenario but I've been to the FC with two of the new SB's who are effectively booty calls now but could easily be standards for me.

I also recognize there are several CVG SD's on this thread. I would appreciate their perspectives especially.

RB.

Hey Red, Welcome to the Sugar Blog. First, what is CVG?

Here is my technique for downsizing that worked with one so far. I was paying full offer for several months until I hit a hard stretch. Money was tight yet I wanted to keep seeing her. So I told her that I could not see her any more because of finances, but that I would miss her, etc, blah, blah. After a few weeks of no communication I contacted her and said that I missed her too much and would love to be able to see her if she would consider a lower reimbursement and could only pay $100 / session. She didn't miss a beat and accepted that readily. She isn't the most reliable and I'm sure she is seeing others (and was anyway), but she continues to provide FS when I need it.

The bottom line is money. If you don't bruise their ego and allow them to maintain their self image then they will take your money. She pops over for a 15 min Wham Bam and scores probably $400/ hour in time value, but that is the way she always was anyway. She is a booty call.

[HollywoodGuy]

This pot is supposed to spend the day tomorrow. 19, 5"7' - home for the summer HCB.

Did the m & g. Cost me 4 dollars. She definitely was thicker than her pic. She didn't seem too interested even though she laughed at all my jokes and drove an hour to see me ( I drove 10 minutes). Spent like 30 minutes drinking tea and left. I told her I thought she was hot and she was a classy NP. Guess my romancing skills are a bit off.

But these girls want something they see as stable, thats probably not the impression I always give, although I told her nothing about my real life.

[HollywoodGuy]

It seems to me that most of the hot MILFS want way more than the young girls do. A lot of people will say start with a MILF because they are easier to bed, I don't see it. Their needs are much bigger, at least out here.

[JZLizard]

I agree with Dolato in theory, but in practice I expect it will be difficult. Ever take a cut or lose a benefit at work? Human nature is we are resentful when something is taken away (whether it was above the "market rate" to begin with or not). I expect that is your existing SB's are in a situation where they need to keep the revenue flowing, they might say yes, but you may see a downturn in performance and they will be looking for the next train.

All that being said, unless one of them is a unicorn, I would move forward with replacing them with lower cost per meet babies that you will like just as much.

This is staggeringly close to what I was going to say. The few times I've witnessed a situation involving pay or benefit cuts, it resulted in a demotivating factor that reduced performance of the employee by a far greater percentage than the actual pay reduction percent. In other words reduce someone's pay by 5% and you can expect them to work about 80% hard as they did before the pay cut, and what's more when the market turns around you can expect they will leave the company for another at the first possible chance they get, because the feeling of betrayal won't fade even if pay is restored.

To put that in a more relevant context, my belief is that even if they did accept the you'll just get lousy sex going forward. I'd say keep paying them what you are, but cut back on frequency of visits to save money for the next crop of POTS. With the additional free time you have, use it to scout new POTS, and this time make the half-price offer to the new girls that you really always wanted to offer he existing ones. Your acceptance rate will drop somewhat, but you've still got your current SBs to fill the need until you've got a full staff of discount babies.

If for some reason you're less satisfied with the discount babies and / or are missing your former "premium" babies, it would be better to just keep paying them what you have been rather than to ask them to convert from premium to discount baby. Then maybe you can have the best of both worlds, more frequent sessions with the discount SBs and an occasional date with the more expensive ones.

[Dsprdo]

I'm not sure what the exact playing field is like in Cincinnati, but if POTs are saying yes to $, then why not let your current roster know that due to some financial issues with your work / business, you can now only offer them $ rather than $$. Start with the SB you'd be least regretful about losing and worst case she leaves you can work to replace her with a $ SB. Then do the same with the next SB until you're at $ with all the SBs that you're seeing. There may be drama, and some or even all may leave when the sugar is cut in half. Just keep in mind this is a hobby for your enjoyment and 2 x the sessions is definitely more enjoyable.

I agree with Dolato in theory, but in practice I expect it will be difficult. Ever take a cut or lose a benefit at work? Human nature is we are resentful when something is taken away (whether it was above the "market rate" to begin with or not). I expect that is your existing SB's are in a situation where they need to keep the revenue flowing, they might say yes, but you may see a downturn in performance and they will be looking for the next train.

All that being said, unless one of them is a unicorn, I would move forward with replacing them with lower cost per meet babies that you will like just as much.

[Dolato]

I am a first-time poster here. I am about halfway through the thread of old posts. I have been working the SD / SB websites in Cincinnati for about 3-4 months. I have a good profile and opening message. I am also having a fairly surprising degree of success (for a married, 60 yo, overweight guy.) In part, my success may be due in part to being overly generous in the beginning. I have been offering $$ per session and typically have sessions lasting 2 hours. After getting friendly in the FC with three different SB's I decided I could sympathetically turn away new offers by lowering my allowance to $. That hasn't worked as some hot-looking and appealing SB's are saying Yes. My problem now is that I really like the SB's I am seeing but my budget is going to limit me to 5-7 sessions per month. If I cut the cost per session in half, I can have twice as many sessions.

I have wrestled with this and I don't see a practical path to reducing my existing SB's allowances without creating some serious drama. Has anybody else found a way to do this? Next, if I do find myself having to cut off some SB's, who are wonderful in every way but price, how do I do it without being a complete asshole? I know I am talking bird-in-the-hand versus bird-in-the-Bush scenario but I've been to the FC with two of the new SB's who are effectively booty calls now but could easily be standards for me.

I also recognize there are several CVG SD's on this thread. I would appreciate their perspectives especially.

RB.

I'm not sure what the exact playing field is like in Cincinnati, but if POTs are saying yes to $, then why not let your current roster know that due to some financial issues with your work / business, you can now only offer them $ rather than $$. Start with the SB you'd be least regretful about losing and worst case she leaves you can work to replace her with a $ SB. Then do the same with the next SB until you're at $ with all the SBs that you're seeing. There may be drama, and some or even all may leave when the sugar is cut in half. Just keep in mind this is a hobby for your enjoyment and 2 x the sessions is definitely more enjoyable.