"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

**Hernando** · 11-13-12 13:17

As many of you know from my previous postings my ex-SB of 1+ years lived 2 hours away and we each drove 1 hour to meet in the middle. I felt very secure with this arrangement because of the safety factor. You never know who you will meet in the oddest places but distance is a good thing. The down side is the hotel rental. I always hated giving the $1000s of sugar for the room. There were multiple decades difference in our ages and most people did not stare, but one homely 50 yr old wife did a 180 in Starbucks and started slugging her husband in the arm. It was hysterical. I did a little bend me down kiss just to give her something to tut tut about. Poor husband was probably wondering how he can get in on the program.

I now have a lovely new SB and so far everything is going well. The only worrisome part is that she is local and we go to out of the way but local places to eat and drink. Even though I am separated I still have to be discrete. So I worry about discovery. I need to find some places that are a little out of town so that I can relax a little more. I never have any concerns about people disapproving of my GF, s age. Too bad for them. The ladies feel threatened and the guys are envious.

**Member #7201** · 11-13-12 08:39

Originally Posted by John G Smith [View Original Post]

Interesting conversation.

I'm in my 30s and I can still pass for late 20s on a good day, so it doesn't look too out of place when I'm in public with a young 20 something SB.

However, since I'm married I do have to be careful about being out in public with a young women too close to home. You guys heard me complaining a month or so ago about wanting a SB in my local area. But now I appreciate having a SB that's over a hour away in a city I have no ties to. It means I can take her out without having to stress about being spotted by someone I know.

Hell I know a guy that's a little over 50 and he takes his 19 and 20 yr old SB's shopping and out to eat. He doesn't worry what other people are thinking because they can easily pass as his daughters, niece, or even GRANDDAUGHTERS! But he does prefer to go out of town where nobody will recognize him.

**John G Smith** · 11-13-12 08:31

It's been awhile since I've posted an update on my own SB activities. I've been heavily involved with my 6/6 SB (yeah I upgraded her). She managed to be a keeper. We've met several times and keep in almost daily contact. She's hot, has a great personality, and very sexual. I decided that I'm pretty much going to devote 80-90% of my sugar resources toward her. I definitely could see the possibility of getting e-involved with her at some point but I'm still just enjoying things now. She's also bi, so although she hasn't brought it up, I'm sure there's a possibility of some additional fun down the line. I'm looking forward to seeing this last a while. She's not only great in bed, but we have excellent conversations on long car rides and such. So it's easy to be around her.

Even though I've been mostly focused on my 6/6 SB, I still had some outstanding business to take care of. I had a local "hookup" SB who was still on my payroll. We would basically meet late at night for car dates once a week. However the past month, she kept calling me to setup late-night meets, but she kept falling asleep at the last minute. My work days are already long, so after 3 consecutive failed / delayed meets because she fell asleep, I finally told her the next time I see her I wouldn't be giving her an allowance as penalty for wasting my time too many times. I told her she would just have to meet me once "on the house" and then things would go back to normal if she could not fall asleep anymore. But she balked at this, so I gave her her walking papers. She was a 19 year-old I had been seeing since the summer, but it was time to end it. I was only seeing her out of obligation mostly lately. She had zero passion in our romps. She's at school and lives at home, but in a couple of years if things don't go well for her, I could easily see her on BP. She already has the mechanical mindset needed.

So I'm down to one SB and I think that's how want it to be for now. I don't have any active accounts on any sugar daddy sites either. Let's see how long this lasts.

**John G Smith** · 11-13-12 07:59

Interesting conversation.

I'm in my 30s and I can still pass for late 20s on a good day, so it doesn't look too out of place when I'm in public with a young 20 something SB.

However, since I'm married I do have to be careful about being out in public with a young women too close to home. You guys heard me complaining a month or so ago about wanting a SB in my local area. But now I appreciate having a SB that's over a hour away in a city I have no ties to. It means I can take her out without having to stress about being spotted by someone I know.

All the other advice given by the members here is sound. But don't worry, I made some similar mistakes with my first SB. I also gave my real identity to my first SB. I got lucky that she was a girl who was from a rich family and she just wanted to be pampered and go shopping since her parents reduced her allowance. She had no interest in blackmailing me since it was a good chance her parents made more than me. LOL.

But yes, clothing shopping can be a bit awkward at times. Especially if the store is cramped and there's no place to sit. Then you're just following her around as a moving clothing rack. It's always a lot more fun when you can pick out the outfits for her, but most girls will still want to buy a couple of outfits that match their own taste.

BTW, has anyone ever got it on in a dressing room? I saw some porn with some couples getting it on in a dressing room (mostly Europeans) and I was wondering if any members here have attempted it with their SB in a department store? I wonder if that fantasy is feasible or if I should just let it die.

**Zomby** · 11-12-12 20:01

Originally Posted by BigTigger [View Original Post]

It it obvious she cannot handle the realities of the situation. I understand your sense of honesty, but in this case, you don't gain anything by being honest. There isn't a reason to bring these items up. Enjoy the moment and enjoy the time with her. It's important that she believe the dream and is able to fully get herself into the fantasy that comes with this type of relationship. So either avoid talking about certain topics or lie about them.

Well, I can certain sympathize with not raising the subject, I'm not convinced actively lying about something like that is going to be productive. I personally have a preference for as much honesty as possible. I'll withhold information and proclaim "none of your business", but I don't see any reason to lie to her.

As for an expiration date, I might not have been as blunt as the OP on the subject, but neither would I have made any secret of it, especially if it was important to me, which I can't honestly say it would be. My experience has no doubt left me biased, but I'd want to maintain a worthwhile relationship for as long as possible, and not place any bounds on it. As I've told my SB on multiple occasions, one or the other of us will know when it's over, so don't be afraid to address it when it happens.

Again, I've had a total of one sugar baby in my entire life, and it's lasted longer than many others' here apparently have, so mine might not be the most strategically correct opinion on this subject.

Originally Posted by BigTigger [View Original Post]

On the first part, why the hell do you care what other people think? Dude get over it.

As a married man, I think I can probably answer that one. I don't want to be noticed, and to be frank, she doesn't really want to be seen with me in public, either. One of the reasons neither of us complains about the long drive we have to meet is because it's less likely that we'll meet someone who knows us. Not impossible, but less likely.

/z

**CantWinLosin** · 11-12-12 19:39

Originally Posted by HollywoodGuy [View Original Post]

Dude I am 58 and date on average 22 year olds. You think I give a shit about people staring.

I can certainly respect the guys who feel this way and live where they can carry it off. But this ain't Hollywood; many of us live in small-town-bible-belt style America and have public lives. I'm noticing that it's becoming pretty rare that I go anywhere around here without running into someone I have social / civic connections to. Doing that with a girl half my age (that isn't one of my daughters) could be a real problem for me, and I'm not married. The married brothers here have even less freedom in that way than I do.

A lot of these younger babies simply don't grasp that. The media has pushed this titillating image of sugar relationships being all about a rich guy showering some sexy young girl with gifts and taking her to expensive places and fancy events on his arm, and more and more of this latest generation of younger SBs have swallowed that myth hook, line and sinker. When you explain to them how this really works, they get offended, not only because they don't want to feel like a hooker but because they feel lied to, either by you or by Dr. Phil.

I've pretty much given up on anything younger than 30. They may not always have that tight young body, but they know how the world actually turns and are far more realistic. They also tend to be less demanding financially, and they appreciate it more.

**BigTigger** · 11-12-12 19:04

I'm not sure if it came out the right way. I meant to say "Ditto what Hollywood said!"

Originally Posted by HollywoodGuy [View Original Post]

I am obviously so girl addicted I couldn't lie if I wanted to. LOL.

**HollywoodGuy** · 11-12-12 18:20

Originally Posted by BigTigger [View Original Post]

My Advice.

It it obvious she cannot handle the realities of the situation. I understand your sense of honesty, but in this case, you don't gain anything by being honest. There isn't a reason to bring these items up. Enjoy the moment and enjoy the time with her. It's important that she believe the dream and is able to fully get herself into the fantasy that comes with this type of relationship. So either avoid talking about certain topics or lie about them.

You are not trying to marry her and who wants to know the exact end date of relationship. Even if you know, you will have much more fun the happier she is and the more blissfully ignorant you keep her. I'd rather have months or years of great awesome sex with a young hottie and just deal with the fall-out of a sudden break-up. If you are smart, it doesn't even have to be sudden, once she graduates, she may drop you. But always consider the words and the positives and negatives that come with them. In this case a happy blissfully ignorant SB will keep you happier longer.

On the first part, why the hell do you care what other people think? Dude get over it. Especially since the age difference is so small. I'd rather people that don't know me think I'm up to something as opposed to the negatives that come with giving a SB my credit card. I'm guessing that also means you are not using a pseudo either. So, now she has your information, credit card info, real name, etc. You are no longer in a position of control and that's not a good place to be with certain SBs. My money and my private life are much more important to me than what some people I don't know think about me. And even if they were right, that's cool too!

Ditto HollyWood!

BigTigg. Out!

I am obviously so girl addicted I couldn't lie if I wanted to. LOL.

**Spitfire** · 11-12-12 15:24

Originally Posted by AllSeasonLv [View Original Post]

I tried to get into my SA mail this weekend and discovered my subscription had lapsed. This morning in my email, there were at least ten or twelve winks, messages, etc. Waiting for me. None were anywhere near central VA. Most were from the Philippines, Eastern Europe, South and Central America! So I'll take your advice and hold off re-uping and wait for the free month offer. Good advice.

Allseasonlvr

Sd4me will offer the free month. SA will not.

**AllSeasonLv** · 11-12-12 13:19

Originally Posted by HollywoodGuy [View Original Post]

This is a common ploy at all dating sites. The moment your membership expires lo and behold the hotties come calling. Don't be fooled. Wait a little longer and they might offer you a free month. At sd4me this is standard operating procedure

I tried to get into my SA mail this weekend and discovered my subscription had lapsed. This morning in my email, there were at least ten or twelve winks, messages, etc. Waiting for me. None were anywhere near central VA. Most were from the Philippines, Eastern Europe, South and Central America! So I'll take your advice and hold off re-uping and wait for the free month offer. Good advice.

Allseasonlvr

**BigTigger** · 11-12-12 12:56

My Advice.

It it obvious she cannot handle the realities of the situation. I understand your sense of honesty, but in this case, you don't gain anything by being honest. There isn't a reason to bring these items up. Enjoy the moment and enjoy the time with her. It's important that she believe the dream and is able to fully get herself into the fantasy that comes with this type of relationship. So either avoid talking about certain topics or lie about them.

You are not trying to marry her and who wants to know the exact end date of relationship. Even if you know, you will have much more fun the happier she is and the more blissfully ignorant you keep her. I'd rather have months or years of great awesome sex with a young hottie and just deal with the fall-out of a sudden break-up. If you are smart, it doesn't even have to be sudden, once she graduates, she may drop you. But always consider the words and the positives and negatives that come with them. In this case a happy blissfully ignorant SB will keep you happier longer.

On the first part, why the hell do you care what other people think? Dude get over it. Especially since the age difference is so small. I'd rather people that don't know me think I'm up to something as opposed to the negatives that come with giving a SB my credit card. I'm guessing that also means you are not using a pseudo either. So, now she has your information, credit card info, real name, etc. You are no longer in a position of control and that's not a good place to be with certain SBs. My money and my private life are much more important to me than what some people I don't know think about me. And even if they were right, that's cool too!

Ditto HollyWood!

BigTigg...out!