"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[Rrguy]

Gentlemen.

I have been following this forum religiously and practicing the lessons in Knoxville, Tennessee. I have even posted some of my results here previously. Recently I have had a real WTF moment. Some of this Scott knows, as I sought his advice; the real WTF is new, however.

My most recent SB candidate has been a 21-year old college student. Bright, but seemingly a reserved personality. Wanted to take it slow, so I did. Suddenly got bored cause I was going slow, and hit me with negotiations. Her "best deal for both of us" boiled down to $500 / month allowance, sliding scale for FC visits: $100 for above the waist, $300 for oral, $500 for intercourse;"obviously" the lesser steps are included oh the higher, and I understand the full Monty to be pretty much whatever I want, multiple hours / pops. Needless to say, I was stunned. The economy isn't great, and this is Knoxville, for God's sake, not NYC or LA! I was horrified, shocked. And, admittedly, a little crushed as I had already put in time, money and effort with nothing to to show at that point.

Anyway, I tried it once last weekend instead of running like hell. I know, fool and his money, right? So I'm in for 1/2 of the monthly plus a full visit. It was "meh", so I wrote her, told her so, said we needed to talk, figure out if we were going to continue, cause the whole youth-texting, lack of conversation, uninterested attitude wasn't worth it to me.

So she emails me back last night, and I said WTF. She says if I really wanted unlimited time with her, everything, no pay as you go, she would expect. Are you ready?. $5000 / month! I've never seen any that gold-plated!

Here's another one that really pisses me off. She said some guy, and I assume he's either in Knoxville or close, offered her $1500 for the first visit, drinks and lots of sex, $1200 per visit after that, at least twice a week!

It's one thing to have and use money. Its another to totally ruin the economic scale for everyone else in the area! If I had money to burn I would use it. I use what I have, but this is ridiculous!

Any suggests how to get the word out to whomever is fucking things up in Knoxville? I'm posting something similar to this in the final board, but I don't have any idea if this guy will see it.

[Golfcart]

I want to caution all of you who need to protect your anonymity that Google reverse image search is a frighteningly powerful tool. All you need to do is drag and drop an image into the search bar, and it will find it, if it exists anywhere else on the web, in under ten seconds.

The search that Google performs is not a search of the internet at that moment. Google "crawls" the internet and builds an inventory of text and images. It is this inventory that Google is searching at that moment.

The rate items are added to the internet is what it is and the rate Google crawls is less. Google is good but it is behind. So I am told.

As has been discussed in the past, pipl dot com is useful for finding other instances of an email address use. I can't remember if it works with phone numbers or not.

For phone numbers try Caller ID Lookup, http://www.cidlookup.com. It is pretty good.

[ChiGuy606]

I've been quiet lately due to my vacation and travels, but am back in town now and had an overwhelming urge to try out something new.

I've been working on a particular candidate for quite a while off and on. She had a rather. Graphic. Description of what she was into and looking for. Of course this meant she would typically be flooded with messages from guys, the vast majority of which were crude and 'descriptive' but not articulate.

I decided to differentiate myself by being extremely respectful (hey, I'm always respectful) yet suave in my writings to her. Finally it worked, and we started corresponding a few times a day via email. She sent me pictures of a gorgeous blonde hair, blue eyed beauty with an AMAZING chest. Honestly like Christina Hendricks size. 38DDD. Every photo she sent me (all clothed) had this overriding 'feature' of her that you just could not keep your eyes away from. So going into this week, I took a page from Mr Scott's book and tried to move the communication to SMS. That really sped up the process. Here is how fast things went after we started texting:

July 4- We started texting later in the evening & got very flirty. Soon after we agreed to meet for only a quick drink after work (she works very close to my office) on the 5th. About an hour of texting later, the potential drink evolved into (at her suggestion) that maybe I should have a room ready to go as well.

July 5- Lots (and lots) of flirtations texts during the day, but by the afternoon, she started to tell me she was getting nervous. She wanted me to assure her that she wasn't going to be paid to have sex with me, even though it was assumed that if I did give her an agreed to amount of sugar, panties would certainly be on the floor. My simple reply of "I am not going to pay you to have sex with me" was enough to calm her fears and get her relaxed enough to meet me, the logic of that exchange still escapes me, but I've never claimed to be able to understand what goes in inside the head of a woman. She then texted back to tell me that we probably shouldn't even meet at the resturaunt, and instead I should get some bottles of vodka and tonic, and she'll just meet me right in the room after 5:00 (the hotel was literally about 2 blocks away from where both of us work). I let her know that that seems like a spectacular idea!

It's now 3:00pm and she started telling me that she is once again nervous and I am now starting to worry that this is going to turn out to be a bust. I was able to diffuse the situation by (honestly) just letting her know that I had absolutely no expectations of her at all, and that I would only have fun myself if she were 100% comfortable. I told her that if I do not make her comfortable, she can leave at any time and I would not be upset. I told her that the only thing I really was expecting going into the day would be to meet for a quick drink in a public place, we can forget about sugar & hotel rooms, etc & just have a simple and innocent M&G. That really was the truth, I had no expectations of getting laid when the day started, and as long as I got a chance to meet her and let her know I was not a weirdo, I'd be happy.

Well that apparently worked fabulously because she immediately calmed down and the next 2 hours were nothing but texts of what she'd like to do to me, what she'd like done to her, and what I'd like done to myself by her (?).

I left the office early to get the room arranged, sent her the room number at 4:45 and there was a knock on the door at 5:10.

In walks this tall stately blonde with beautiful blue eyes and those enormous features of hers. She works in a law firm, and was dressed pretty sexy for where she works, a black short dress with plunging neckline to show off the goods. Granted, it is about 130F today in the city, and most women are walking around wearing a lot less than normal. She was a little bigger than I expected. Not fat big, but just large everything, in a good way. It's a bit hard to explain, but her body really does match her 38DDD's. She rigorously works out 2 hours a day and she is very toned. Nice shapely ass, flat stomach, great legs, really not an ounce of fat anywhere but where it counts.

She was texting on her phone to her cousin when she walked into the room. Apparently her cousin is also involved on the SA site, and she was keeping in close contact with her and coaching her on what to do initially. It was sort of odd, and I'm sure she was just letting her know she was safe, etc. Literally within about 30 seconds she lost all her apprehension with me, and then even let me see what she was writing. Basically "He's very cute" and "Not creepy" and "I'm fine don't' worry". I made her a drink and we talked for about 10 minutes. We are both from the same general area and share a lot of the same background. All nervousness and apprehension washed away and things just naturally flowed into the action when she unzipped my pants and started an extraordinary JB. We had multiple opportunities to enjoy each other and she was incredibly accommodating to me. Open to pretty much anything, and she is very much focused on her breasts (as am I!). Biting her nipples during the main event (she begged for it) seems to be a sure-fire way to get her to cum, and she loves LOTS of breast play. Considering the fact that I couldn't keep my eyes, mouth or hands off of them for practically the whole evening, we made quite a team!

Overall very good times, and on the way out she turns around and tells me that she thinks we're going to be best friends.

Anyone else have any fireworks this week?

[ChiGuy606]

Another concern about your photos you should have is to not put a very descriptive picture of yourself on the SA site directly. I always put an obscure photo on there and then send more descriptive ones via email. The reason being these sites get hacked all the time. Believe me, I deal with this for a living. Most of the time they are compromised very quietly, and then the perpetrators (usually E. European criminal organizations) will blackmail the owners of the site that if they pay a relatively small amount ($10K is pretty typical) , then they will not do anything bad with the data. Unfortunately 8 or 9 times out of 10 the companies will usually pay these guys off, so they continue to do it and make a decent living off of their work.

In the case of SA, doing something bad with the data could mean publicly posting photos of married men looking for extra action.

Also regarding SA's finances.

I believe only the guys are the ones who have to pay, so their revenue is actually more like

(1. 5mil *.10) * 50 / month.

Still a very respectable income!

[F Scott]

Gentlemen,

As stated below, I am currently stretching out the old muscles in an attempt to land a sweet baby or two, and things are going along fairly well. Nothing in the creel yet, but lots of action.

I want to caution all of you who need to protect your anonymity that Google reverse image search is a frighteningly powerful tool. All you need to do is drag and drop an image into the search bar, and it will find it, if it exists anywhere else on the web, in under ten seconds.

The URL is images dot google dot com, simple as that. The only photos I use are ones taken specifically for my Sugar activities, but this is not always the case for these little babies, and it can be a useful way of ferreting out the masquerading pros, or determining that who you are communicating with is in fact a real baby.

As has been discussed in the past, pipl dot com is useful for finding other instances of an email address use. I can't remember if it works with phone numbers or not.

Just some observations to the married brothers out there to be careful. If possible, create a self-referencing loop of Sugar profile, Sugar email, and, as I have done, Sugar facebook page. That way, if they pipl you, all they get is what you want them to get.

Keep safe, and don't forget to write.

Scott

PS - on the SA site there is a video clip of a Nightline piece on the Sugar Bowl which features SA, and there is an astonishing statistic that is presented: of the 1.5 million members of SA, 90% are guys. So that means, if my math is correct, that for any baby, there are at potentially hundreds of guys contacting her. A little depressing, but makes me think that waiting a week or so and sending a follow up might help a fella stand out. The other equation to run is $50, average monthly membership cost, x 1.5 million! Anybody want to start a competing site with me?

[F Scott]

Gentlemen,

I'm certain none of you was holding your breath to find out what has been happening with Scottie and me, but I feel compelled to share nonetheless. In a word, not much. As much as I try to jump into the deep end of the pool, I keep bouncing off the surface!

After my wonderful back-seat Oral Festival with Goth Baby, many of you know I got the news we all dread from my ATF, which really sent me into a tailspin, I have to be honest. Be careful out there, my friends - an old heart apparently breaks into many more shards than a young one. But enough of that.

I have been actively casting to fish in my home pool, initially as therapy rather than any really-committed pursuit, and have managed to set up a few m&gs, not all of which have gone according to plan. My first one was with an adorable neuroscience major, I kid you not. I am unaccountably drawn to nerdy, science-oriented babies, as well as the artistic, creative types, both of which reflect aspects of my own personality and interests. It turns out that this particular baby was originally interested in being an art history major, which was what I pursued, so she was my ideal! We met for lunch and had a fantastic time, spending almost three hours laughing, talking, touching lightly, and basically flirting like mad.

As I was driving back to work, we texted like 'tweeners, and I thought it would be the work of but a moment to get her panties on the floor the next time we met. My brothers, I have been at this a while, and have netted quite a few babies, so my instincts are rarely wrong, except in this case. In the intervening week, she has remained stubbornly uncooperative, resisting all attempts to ink in a date for our next playtime. WTF, one has to wonder. I continue to cast in her direction, however, and receive intermittent assurances that she has not lost interest, is as into me as I am her, but so far Air Scottie has not been cleared for landing. Fuck, fuck and double fuck!

In the interim, I have communicated on SA with a totally, totally hot MILF who has admitted that she is between a rock and a hard place, (do we have an acronym for Hot Single Mom? I believe we do: HSM) , and would love some relief. "I'm your man," I tell her with assurance, and so hopefully we will get together next week when my SO is out of town. We are still in the flirting stage, and before my experience with Dr. Baby, above, I would have put my panty-removal odds at 3 to 1 in my favor, but now I'm just not sure anymore.

Lastly, I had an m&g set up this morning with another baby, a theater major and struggling (I hope) actress who loves to cook. Again, just my type. And it was a total no-show. And this despite the fact that we texted all day Friday as I was driving out of town, and all day yesterday as I was coming back. Lots of "LOL" and "OMG" and "hahaha" and smiley faces and winky faces and so forth. In days gone by, right now I would be relating to you all how enjoyable it was to have spent the afternoon fucking her, but instead I slouched back to work and opened mail, by myself! I am hoping that nothing awful has happened to her, but also kind of secretly hoping for at least apendicitis at 3 am. I don't want to give up on what I am certain would be an enjoyable relationship, but a man has his pride, does he not?

In any event, as stated I will be unsupervised for most of next week, and have lined up playdates with Goth Baby and Brit, so I have that to look forward to, but I still have two open days to fill. Polo, I'm afraid, has lost interest in me, or it could in truth be that her kids are now out of school and she doesn't have the flexibility in her schedule she once had, which is what she tells me. In that case, I can look forward to a resumption of my riding lessons come Fall. Giddyup!

I'm happy to see so many brothers weighing in; please keep at it. I may (God willing) have something interesting to add in the next few days; at least there will be Goth Baby and her enourmous rack. I have spent many a pleasureable minute texting to her just what Scottie and I will do to her when next we meet, and I believe she is eager to have me make good. At least I think so; you never know.

Keep up the good work out there, my brothers, and don't forget to write.

Scott

[Magic Rat]

Well I just had a new for me experience re: a meet and greet. The SB required an allowance just to meet. Repeat "required." I passed and told her it sounded to much like an escort situation. Should it really be that difficult to get a woman who has already decided to be compensated for sexual favors to take our $$$? Color me confused.

[JoesParty]

I'm from the West coast but I was reading this forum since I'm into the SD / SB scene and we don't have a proper Sugarbabies forum over there.

Welcome to the forum, John. If you haven't already discovered it by reading here, most of us aren't from Richmond. I'm not sure just how many are, but we all come here for the excellent dialogue.

You seem to have jump-started the dormant discussion with your M&G question. I don't have much to add to the already excellent discussion. I would love to skip the M&G altogether and proceed immediately to the FC, but I find that I am more comfortable meeting at least for drinks first. To each his own, I guess. As for how to handle getting noticed in public, I, too, fall back on the "intern" and "old friend" excuses. Lucky for me, I live in a large metropolitan area, so it's only happened once. That said, I try to avoid fishing in waters too immediately close to home. I focus my activity in areas of town that I know my family and friends do not frequent.

[Member #5055]

Funny this topic should come up just as I did one yesterday. I normally manage to vet potential SBs well before meeting them, so FC is almost immediate.

However, every now and again you get a cute young chick who really is not into just jumping into bed, but who you know may well be SO worth cultivating.

Now they may get a little expensive to cultivate, but often they are not after $$$ up front, and they want to feel a chemistry with anybody they fuck!

Yesterday's was a 21 year old spinner. Had a great hour chatting with her about life and stuff. Gave her. 6 fun money as she was going away with friends for a few days. Next meeting will be dinner and drinks. I will also push for a FC afterwards, making it clear that serious $$ will not be forthcoming unless we have FC chemistry. So at some time before I have spent too much $ I will get to bed her.

If she is as good as I think she is.then she could cost me a bit until I decide to let her go!

As far as a meeting, public place. Yes. I do like the idea of a clipboard.

GW.

So I'd love to hear advice from other married SD / Mongers here who work from home while also trying to balance the SD / SB lifestyle. I definitely would appreciate any tips on creating more "free time" that doesn't raise suspicions from the Warden. Right now, my gym time is the only window I have during the week.

[TravelinSD]

Hey, thought I'd throw my 2cents in on public M&Gs. I personally like them. I've never even attempted to try and make an arrangement to meet alone. I'm somewhat surprised that you can even convince a non-pro to do that. Then again, I am looking for a social / emotional connection in addition to the sex part. I do think that hour or so of conversation makes for a better, more relaxed sexual experience. I'm running about 25/75 on my initial M&G leading to sex on the first date, that's sex 25% of the time. Sometimes it's been mentioned and details worked out ahead of time and sometimes I've just gone with the flow and it's happened. Just recently I had a text exchange with a PotSB asking her to dinner. Her response was "Just dinner?". Due to schedule conflicts on both our parts we haven't met yet, but have worked out all the details already and just need to find a time. That is kind of exciting. As far as wasting the sugar on a bad experience, I always leave the sex and sugar as an option if things go well at dinner or lunch. I'll say something like "if things go well and we have chemistry, perhaps we can go back to my place (or room) for a night cap after dinner." That way the most I'm out is the dinner or lunch costs. I would be much more upset if I laid out the sugar amount and then found out the physical chemistry wasn't there. As far as public M&G, I agree with what most folks have already said. I too am at least 30 years older than the PotSBs I'm going out with. If seen and questioned I'd just say it's a friend or business associate. That's my take.

Happy Hunting!

Drummer.

I feel like I caused the topic to go to a grinding halt, haha. So I thought I'd pose a question and ask for a bit of advice.

Over the last several days I've been reading back through this topic (almost about 60% through it so far) and I noticed that even the experienced SDs in this topic almost always have a Meet & Greet with a potential SB before going to a hotel. Is this by choice or necessity?

[Magic Rat]

I've almost always done the meet and greet with a Pot SB. Up until the last few, most of the time the M&G ended up immediately in the FC, or not at all. Either the SBs are changing or I have totally lost my game as I've just dipped a toe back in the SB pool recently. Seems like all the pots are asking what kind of arrangement I want up front, where I would rather discuss that during the M&G. A few times recently when I have told them that, I get no response. I'm beginning to wonder if it's just me or the shallow pool I have to cast my bait. Recently, even if the M&G seems to go well, inevitably the next email is how much are you thinking? Early in my tenure here, we had several posts about slipping the sugar into a pocket at the end, which always seemed to work for me. These days it seems to be different.

As for the M&Gs in a public place, I haven't had much of an issue there, and I live in a small town in the South. I usually take a file with me so the pot SB can be a client is my cover. So far so good.

I think the reason the board has been quiet is just what you said. With summertime here, many more activities consume our time, especially with the holiday week upon us.

Saying that, Nando and Scott have been quiet lately. Hope all is well with them.

[Graham111]

I am impressed that you can vet enough to avoid meet and greet. Perhaps I am not patient enough but I always meet and greet. Keep it light and short. 1 hour. And provide a Starbucks gift certificate as I leave. You quickly find out if the pics are accurate and attitude matches expectations. But I am in an away town where no one would recognize me. Avoids most problems. Last week met a pot SB who's pics were 5 years and 20 pounds ago. A few drinks and the starbucks certificate. No thanks. Texted me when do we get together. I declined respectfully and got a blast that "You owe me, read the web site". On and on and on. Cannot imagine what that would have been like in the FC!

[AliasSM]

John, Looks like its just you and I that are posting on this board these days. Highly unusual to see the board go dormant for so long so I can only speculate that the hot and family-busy summer months have taken their toll on all of the SD activity. I know it's harder for me to get free time out of the house when there are lawns to mow, vacations to plan, and family coming to town to entertain. It's also a busy time at work for me so my free time suffers.

I'm not an expert on the M&G topic, but I do consider it a necessary evil in the true world of SD / SB relations. In my experience, it's hard to convince the true non-pro to go straight to the fucking chamber on the first date without a chance to personally see each other and kick the tires so to speak. I'd love to skip the ritual myself, but don't see that happening, at least in my neck of the woods. It seems ingrained in the SB culture here (in the conservative South) , and thats not likely to change anytime soon. That being said, I think you can reduce your risks considerably if you use your (big) head and take some precautions. I'm married also, but don't have the work-from-home restrictions that you do. I can usually get away for longer lunch periods at my work at least once or twice a week without causing any suspicions. So I almost always suggest a quick lunch to the interested SB. If you pick a spot away from work and normal family hangouts (and away from popular spots like the shopping mall) you reduce the risk of seeing family, friends, and co-workers. Since I am usually at least 30 years older than my SBs, I always try to have some excuse just in case of the random encounter with an acquaintance. It's not like they are catching you in bed with someone. It's only a lunch meeting! So if I meet family or non-work friends, my lunch date would be a new intern at the office that I have been assigned to train for the day. If I meet a work-related person, she is an out-of-town niece or friend of my daughter that I am taking to lunch while she's in town. I've never had to use one of these lines so far, but I always have one handy just in case.

San Diego is a big area, so you should be able to reduce your risks considerably if you chose places a little off the beaten path and have a fall-back story in case Murphy attacks.

I do agree that in an ideal world we could almost eliminate these risks by going directly to the FC.

I read your recent post about your potential Chastity SB. While I think it's highly doubtful that you will ever penetrate this little religious virgin, what fun you will have trying. Keep us informed on how all of this goes. I had almost given up on the CL approach, but you now have me rethinking that strategy. We fish in much different waters being over 3000 miles apart, so you don't have to worry about competition from me. If you care to share one of your more successful CL posts with me, I'd love to see how it works in the South. PM me with any information you feel comfortable with sharing.

Good to have you on this forum. Stay in touch.

Alias.

So I'd love to hear advice from other married SD / Mongers here who work from home while also trying to balance the SD / SB lifestyle. I definitely would appreciate any tips on creating more "free time" that doesn't raise suspicions from the Warden. Right now, my gym time is the only window I have during the week.

[John G Smith]

Okay, now I really feel like I'm flooding the board, but it's Sunday night and I finally got a little free time to myself, so what else am I going to do? But apologies ahead of time for those I'm annoying with my posts.

Anyway, I wanted to share a little bit of my experience that I've been having with a new SB over the last several weeks. A few weeks ago, she responded to my CL ad and actually asked if she could work as my secretary since I mentioned I was a successful businessman in my ad. I basically said I'd think about it (ha!) and we should start a traditional SD / SB relationship first. But what's the most interesting thing about her is that she's 21 and she's supposedly still a virgin! So that's why I'll call her Chastity SB. I was pretty doubtful at first because you don't see too many attractive 21 year-olds who are still virgins these days. I'd rate her about a 7 in looks, an 8 when she puts effort into it. Nice average / slim body. But when I went to her Facebook page (she directed me toward it) and went through it in depth, I finally figured out why she's still a virgin. She's very religious and still lives at home.

But it's pretty clear, a part of her is ready to break free. So not only did we start txting a quite a bit, but also sexting! She really got turned on by the idea of being my secretary and likes role-playing the naughty secretary. She also calls me Daddy all the time and sends me nice little flirtatious txts at least a couple times a day. This all before I've even given her a single cent! And she initiates a lot of it. I told her I would help pay for her college, but since it's just community college and she just wants to take a few classes, it'll only cost a few hundred yet she was super appreciative. She's still unsure if she's ready to have sex, but she's willing to do other "activities" while we work our way up to it.

I adore her already because it just feels like what a real SD / SB relationship should be. I can feel she has a genuine attraction for me in addition to the promise of money. I like how she flirts with me without me having to outline it in a contract or something. And since she's completely fresh, her needs are pretty modest. The other day she asked if I could buy her a bicycle. So she's not trying to juice thousands per month.

THAT said. Because she's religious, I always dread Sundays. It's been like clockwork the past couple of weeks. Every Sunday, she gets cold feet and says,"it's wrong. I'm not that kind of girl. I'm so sorry, I can't do this" Then I have to do some sweet talk and talk her off the ledge. Last week I got annoyed and saw a backup SB. Happened again tonight where she had another moral freakout, but I think I did a better job this time so hopefully she'll stay uninhibited longer this time, LOL.

We still haven't actually met yet. This is partially why in my previous post I was asking for ways to do a M&G in public but discreetly. I'm pretty sure taking her to a hotel right away will scare her off. I need to romance her a bit more.

I would really love to make Chastity SB my prime SB. But there's just so many variables right now. It's been tough to get her to commit for a date for an exact day or time, so I may never actually see her in person at this rate. She clearly has a sexual side she wants to explore, but she may just want to keep it purely txt-based for now. So arranging the first meet has been and will be a challenge. I'm hoping once I can put some sugar in her hand and touch her untouched sexual buttons, she'll be hooked.

But for now, I don't really consider her my prime or backup SB. She's more of my special project. But right now she's not costing me any money and I enjoy txting with her, so I'm willing to be patient. I know some girls would demand a 500-1000 monthly allowance just to do the type of consistent and flirtatious txts she does for free.

I'll keep you guys updated with my progress.

[John G Smith]

I feel like I caused the topic to go to a grinding halt, haha. So I thought I'd pose a question and ask for a bit of advice.

Over the last several days I've been reading back through this topic (almost about 60% through it so far) and I noticed that even the experienced SDs in this topic almost always have a Meet & Greet with a potential SB before going to a hotel. Is this by choice or necessity?

Out here in southern California, it seems much easier to get an SB to have the first meeting at a hotel or private place. Of the last 5 SBs I've met, I met all 5 at a hotel or private place on the very first meeting. Before you ask, yes these were true SBs / non pros. Not UTR or semi-pros. 4 out of the 5 girls, were college girls living at home. The other one was a struggling hair stylist also living at home. I'd say all were about 7-8 in the looks department.

My usual routine is to talk to them initially over email (hopefully getting a Facebook hit in the process). I try to get all the details out of the way before we even meet. So I'll say I'm a generous man, but I need to be discreet. I explain that if we meet in town it will need to be mostly behind closed doors. Most of the girls I correspond with understand what this means. Usually around this time, they ask how much I can help them with. I then give them a per meet offer based on. 1). Do they have a place where we can meet or will I always need to rent a room. 2). How far or close by they live. 3). Do I want her as a backup or primary SB.

Some girls will reject the offer, some girls accept it. If she accepts and I want to start moving things forward, I then give her my GV# and start setting up plans to meet. Since they know I need to be discreet and all the details have already been worked out, the first meet is usually directly at a private place or hotel room. Keep in mind, some of these girls need to be discreet too. They don't want their parents, friends, or boyfriend seeing them at a restaurant / bar with some older guy on a perceived date. Most of the SBs I've talked to, need some discretion as well so as long as you don't give them any "creeper" vibes, they're happy to skip the M&G.

However I agree, there are some advantages to a M&G. You can feel out the girl and see if there is any chemistry before you dole out any large amounts of cash. But at the same time, I think it's also easier for the girl to get cold feet and conversations can get awkward at times, especially when you're talking with someone 10-30 years younger than you. Also more importantly for me, I'm married so it's extremely risky for me to have a dozen M&Gs in public areas in a span of just a couple of months time. I prefer to do my M&G on the hotel table or bed. Talk for a bit to get comfortable and soon as any awkward silence hits, just jump into the action. Then between rounds, have more "M&G" time. This usually gives me a good enough vibe if I want to see her again anyway. If we don't click at all, then it was basically a one-night stand where we both benefited.

Anyway, I do encounter some girls that I don't always want to take the hotel room right away or I need to warm them up a little bit first. Do you guys have any advice for how a married guy can do a public M&G without it being such a huge risk for exposure? I'm in my 30s and can sometimes pass for mid / late 20s, so I usually don't attract too much attention if I'm with someone who at least looks over 21. However even on normal days with my family, we keep randomly bumping into friends, associates, and acquaintances. And those are the ones we saw. I'm sure people have seen me without saying anything. So I really don't want to go to a public place with my SB within a 45-50 mile radius of where I live. I also work from home, so it's very hard just to disappear for several hours. It takes a lot of groundwork for me to get that much free time and I don't want to waste it on a possible fruitless M&G. This is pretty much why I always push just to meet directly in the hotel.

So I'd love to hear advice from other married SD / Mongers here who work from home while also trying to balance the SD / SB lifestyle. I definitely would appreciate any tips on creating more "free time" that doesn't raise suspicions from the Warden. Right now, my gym time is the only window I have during the week.