Massage Parlor Reports

[Gopher88]

I actually need a legit, good massage during the workday downtown, but wouldn't mind extras. I don't recall ever seeing anything mentioned in the loop on these boards. Any recos? Much appreciated!

But would 500 n. Michigan are 8 s. Michigan help you? Lulu great massage at 8 s. 12th Floor.

[Mod Shag]

I actually need a legit, good massage during the workday downtown, but wouldn't mind extras. I don't recall ever seeing anything mentioned in the loop on these boards. Any recos? Much appreciated!

[Gopher88]

Five answers we have been waiting for! Hope this is ok? Let me Know?

Q: WHAT ARE THE SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES FOR?

A: It's Braille for 'suck here. '

Q: WHAT IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS?

A: It's the same as a French kiss, but 'downunder. '

Q: WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS?

A: Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN?

A: Because when they come, they're wild and wet, and when they go, they take your house and car with them.

Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING?

A: Because they don't have any balls to scratch.

BONUS QUESTIONS & ANSWERS.

Q: What is a man's Ultimate Embarrassment?

A: Running into a wall with an erection and breaking his nose.

(Nominated as the world's best short joke.)

A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. 'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains? '

'Not yet, ' she replied.

[Member #5481]

I would have guessed Good To Go.

[CottonPanty]

GTG = get together

No what I meant was "Good to go". In other words, the girls there are ready to play and the place is "good to go". No questions about whether they are legit or not.

And by the way fellas, that list is not in any particular order. The #1 AMP listed is not my favorite by any means. I just typed them as they came to mind.

[Member202]

You made a top ten list a wile back What does GTG mean?

GTG = get together

[Toosweet1975]

So I saw this post and at the top of his list 3953, which is actually 3951 Beijing massage shop caught my eye. Last two visits a long time ago was not productive but maybe she change her game again? PM him and he seem to know what he is talking about. In fact he gave me some ideals like standing in the mirror as she takes care of you. Cool! So instead of my normal routine I thought I try again and see what happens.

Drop by on my lunch. She greeted and was busy but let me wait in the room. Did the hour with table shower. Boys got uncover and she went to work. Got to the room and she did an excellent job of finishing me off. She offer more but I pass. Pros, she seem to be ready to play and more then willing and did not negotiated so cost of extras was whatever I left for a tip. Plenty of roaming and love the wet snatch. Cons, did not like how thin she was. Sort of Granma with the skin hanging on the skeleton and look more like she is in her 60s. And if you like the BS talked of your special bla bla bla then she is for you. Also did not like the politician sign in the window. I real don't want what the low life scum sucking politician had. He probably gets his free so she can get a free pass for her shop.

Summary. Your visit may vary. Hell, minds vary with same place, and girl but different out come. She is good for nice BS and HJ, HE and roaming and more depending on how she feels, I guess. But will pass because of looks and lack of consistence. Either you get some or you don't. So unless my hand is in a cast, I think I will pass. PM if you ran into the same thing at this shop.

One day she is full of energy. Another visit, she is a robot, LOL. I stopped going there months ago. Great post by the way.

[Humpfree]

Screw all that. What I now do when visiting a new place is go right for it at the start. Either grab a little butt on the way in to the room or I lay on my back and when they walk in for the first time I ask them to get right to it. If they refuse, usually a minute or so of negotiating is all it takes. I'm polite during all of this mind you, but if they continue to refuse, I ask for my money back and simply leave. I mean I AM there for a nice massage but we all know why I'm really there. I'm not about to lay there for an hour getting all fired up just to find at then end that they are legit or don't want to play. Talk about blue balls!

You made a top ten list a wile back What does GTG mean?

[Lurker01]

That might actually be easier than you think! Girls LOVE stealing each others clients because they basically all hate each other. What a hen house a MP can be!

The girls don't take MANY days off, but they do take some. Use that in your favor. Just make sure they know there is plenty of PussyPoker to go around. Make sure to wave and say Hi to all the girls during your walk of shame. They will recognize you as being a returning customer.

Last time I did this, I saw the new girl, then the fav the next day. Keep switching off and they won't get too slack until someone wins out as the current ATF

[Cpl Flirt]

So I saw this post and at the top of his list 3953, which is actually 3951 Beijing massage shop caught my eye. Last two visits a long time ago was not productive but maybe she change her game again? PM him and he seem to know what he is talking about. In fact he gave me some ideals like standing in the mirror as she takes care of you. Cool! So instead of my normal routine I thought I try again and see what happens.

Drop by on my lunch. She greeted and was busy but let me wait in the room. Did the hour with table shower. Boys got uncover and she went to work. Got to the room and she did an excellent job of finishing me off. She offer more but I pass. Pros, she seem to be ready to play and more then willing and did not negotiated so cost of extras was whatever I left for a tip. Plenty of roaming and love the wet snatch. Cons, did not like how thin she was. Sort of Granma with the skin hanging on the skeleton and look more like she is in her 60s. And if you like the BS talked of your special bla bla bla then she is for you. Also did not like the politician sign in the window. I real don't want what the low life scum sucking politician had. He probably gets his free so she can get a free pass for her shop.

Summary. Your visit may vary. Hell, minds vary with same place, and girl but different out come. She is good for nice BS and HJ, HE and roaming and more depending on how she feels, I guess. But will pass because of looks and lack of consistence. Either you get some or you don't. So unless my hand is in a cast, I think I will pass. PM if you ran into the same thing at this shop.

Hi everyone,

Long-time lurker on this site and I've gotten some good tips here so I felt like I should finally sign up and give you guys some tips of my own. The following is a list of AMP's around town that I know well, frequent regularly and are good places to go to. I don't go for FS or even BJ's, just a nice massage w / HE. So I can't comment on those points but I can assure you that these places are good to go. Many of you may already know some of these places but maybe you'll find a new place here. My am I posting up all of my places? Well I'm leaving out a couple of my faves but the pickings around town are slim (nothing like CA used to be when I lived there) and I hope that some of you in return will PM me with some other places that are new and different. I'm especially looking for a MP with nice Latina ladies. I used to go to Tropical Spa and I'm pissed that they were shut down.

Here's my list in no particular order. I'm not going to rate them as everyone has a different opinion about what is good or not.

1. 3953 Irving Park Road. Near Irving and Pulaski. One one girl works here. Nice girl, very thin and nice bod but face isn't so great. Cons are you have to park on Irving and it's a busy street with a lot of people around.

2. 4176 N. Pulaski. Acupuncture and Nutrition Center. Just around the corner from the first place. 3-4 girls here. Mostly pretty. They get pretty of liberal here with what they will do. Another busy street but you can leave out the back.

3. 3127 W. Devon. Devon Spa. Decent place, liberal ladies, a bit older, in mid 40's. Kind of pushy and can be a bit bitchy when you ask for things but they always come through.

4. 6336 N. Lincoln. B. D. Spa. Also a good place. Women are attractive, good massages and they're down. Not much dividing each room from one another so you can hear a bit of what's going on in other rooms. Otherwise a good place.

5. 3334 W. Peterson. I found this place on this board and it's a good one. A couple of tiny cuties. Place is cool but they won't go any further than HE. Parking in back and fairly discreet entrance.

6. 1919 W. Diversey. Harvest Spa. Another good place and they get liberal. Again, a lot of traffic passing by so it's not very discreet. A man will always be up front at the desk and he has a German Shepard. Otherwise it's a fairly normal place and it's GTG.

7. 2559 W. Division. K&M Spa. One of my favorites. 2 girls only work here. Both are very sweet and beautiful. They will stay fully dressed and don't do any more than what I like to do but the experiencing is quite good. And parking is nice and easy in the back with a back entrance.

SUBURBS.

8. 4833 Dempster, Skokie. June Spa. I guess a lot of you guys know this one. For those that don't. It's OK and I go occasionally but the women there are older and the experience is bland. But it breaks up the monotony!

9. 3690 Dempster st, Skokie. Lifetime Spa. Another oldie but goodie. Always fun and fairly discreet to get into. Women are fairly pretty and down for fun.

10. 1222 N. Roselle, Schaumburg. Hard to find at first, it's in the basement of a small doctors' office building. Only been there a couple of times and it's not that great. Women have been old and uninspiring but they're down.

11. 1750 W. Algonquin, Mount Prospect. Exercise Spa. A little bit of a dump but girls are fairly pretty and down to have fun.

Well that's it. Happy hobbying and please don't forget to share.

[Nighthawk55]

You speak of the truth. The only problem is I have been seeing the same girl at a parlor for about a year now. We have sushi and other food together at times. Now I was there the other day and seen a new girl that got my little pee pee harder that ever before. Now I need to find a way to try the new girl.

That might actually be easier than you think! Girls LOVE stealing each others clients because they basically all hate each other. What a hen house a MP can be!

The girls don't take MANY days off, but they do take some. Use that in your favor. Just make sure they know there is plenty of PussyPoker to go around. Make sure to wave and say Hi to all the girls during your walk of shame. They will recognize you as being a returning customer.

[PussyPoker]

I had a recent conversation with a provider at a MP. She told me she won't even SEE a client she does not recognize. She won't even bring them in the door.

So, your best bet for continued service is to establish an ongoing deal. Seeing the same person over and over is the best way to get excellent service. Now more than ever.

You speak of the truth. The only problem is I have been seeing the same girl at a parlor for about a year now. We have sushi and other food together at times. Now I was there the other day and seen a new girl that got my little pee pee harder that ever before. Now I need to find a way to try the new girl

[Truthfu11]

Check the Waukegan board.

Just moved here from Indianapolis. I need something in the Gurnee or 10 mile radius. I'm a senior member pm with some inf please. I like the AMP scene better than anything else.

Thanks,

Norske 1

[Nighthawk55]

Just moved here from Indianapolis. I need something in the Gurnee or 10 mile radius. I'm a senior member pm with some inf please. I like the AMP scene better than anything else.

Thanks,

Norske 1

Wrong section.

[Norske 1]

Just moved here from Indianapolis. I need something in the Gurnee or 10 mile radius. I'm a senior member pm with some inf please. I like the AMP scene better than anything else.

Thanks,

Norske 1