Massage Parlor Reports

[FullyMooned]

Who gives the best deep tissue massage in town? How about a massage with lots of stretching? Prefer with benefits but will take without if the provider is amazing.

[Member #6328]

Thinking about driving to the city for a Latina, but I live pretty far and don't want to waste my time. Any recommendations or stories?

[EyeEatAss]

I'm one of the assholes who tell the younger, better looking providers to increase their rates. Why? Simple. They can't, and shouldn't work for peanuts. To put it bluntly, 90-95% of mongers are fat, old, ugly, and overly hairy. This is based on guys I've seen throughout the years. About half of what I hear through the walls, sounds like 4th grade inbreds. What I read here, and on other sites, is so many guys simply can't afford this hobby. If you were a provider, why would you charge so little to deal with this? I wouldn't. Many of you will be offended, but in my experience, people only get offended when they hear the truth.

Long story short: I wound up dating an AMP I met outside of her "office". Most of the guys were dumpy looking according to her. She rarely FS'd them unless the price was right! I'm going to assume that most of your adversaries fit that mold! She pretty much jacked them off and occasionally blew them covered with the occasional SS on her chest. She's in her late twenties with a face that matches her bangin' body. She did have "some" decent looking dudes but, they all donated her haughty price! Your analogy is pretty much spot on!

[Jinurso]

Also, you're not an asshole. You just grossly overestimate your level of influence. There's not a vagina in this city that doesn't know its worth.

Bingo. After he gives her this speech, she nods and says "you're right! Thank you so much. From now on I'm going to charge (you and only you) twice as much!

Meanwhile the rest of us go on paying exactly what we've always been.

[SpaGuy21]

I'm one of the assholes who tell the younger, better looking providers to increase their rates. Why? Simple. They can't, and shouldn't work for peanuts. To put it bluntly, 90-95% of mongers are fat, old, ugly, and overly hairy. This is based on guys I've seen throughout the years. About half of what I hear through the walls, sounds like 4th grade inbreds. What I read here, and on other sites, is so many guys simply can't afford this hobby. If you were a provider, why would you charge so little to deal with this? I wouldn't. Many of you will be offended, but in my experience, people only get offended when they hear the truth.

Being older, mature I get offered lots of outside time where no payment is expected nor asked for.

Based on the fact you've "seen guys" over the years, you assume 90-95% of mongers are fat, old, ugly and overly hairy? Sounds like you need to up your dating game, but this isn't the forum for that and I certainly can't help you there. Listening in through the walls at spas of other mongers being serviced? Kinky, but again, not the correct forum. Being older and mature you get offered lot's of outside time at no charge? One of your descriptions for what you imply to be a negative for a young MT is an old monger, I'm confused.

Your last couple posts seem like trolling or possibly even some form of retribution against this forum. But your profile is new and only has a handful of posts, curious!? Unless, of course, you recently changed profiles after having "the forum" turn on you? Kind of like what happened to the guy posting porn pics in the non-pro section which he claimed to be of himself. Unless of course. Wait a second?!

[HappyGardener]

I am looking for a provider that's fit, like in very good shape, gives a good deep tissue mAssage and a L1. Is that too much to ask?

Yes it is.

[Biliator]

A high quality restaurant knows to charge more than a low quality restaurant. Pizza Hut will always be cheaper than Vito and Nicks. A great looking provider tries to maximize revenue via more customers at lower rates, but working too hard. Thus, adding $20-50, is logical. Most mongers aren't going to walk out over a few bucks. If they do, it means they don't understand economics. Also, as much as I like helping you guys out with good intel, I'm in this hobby to help myself to a great time. Being older, mature I get offered lots of outside time where no payment is expected nor asked for.

Seeing a provider outside the spa. Golly, wish I'd thought of that.

[GeneralObvious]

I don't understand why Mr Help Myself is on here. Why even be on this forum. And your analogies are ridiculous. Maybe move on to another forum if your not contributing anything except insults. Who's Man's is this LOL. Someone come get him. Everyone else have a great day.

You need to read the whole statement, and respond to it. All you did was cherry pick one phrase. Happy to help anyone who asks, but bring something to the table.

[BabyBoy2013]

A high quality restaurant knows to charge more than a low quality restaurant. Pizza Hut will always be cheaper than Vito and Nicks. A great looking provider tries to maximize revenue via more customers at lower rates, but working too hard. Thus, adding $20-50, is logical. Most mongers aren't going to walk out over a few bucks. If they do, it means they don't understand economics. Also, as much as I like helping you guys out with good intel, I'm in this hobby to help myself to a great time. Being older, mature I get offered lots of outside time where no payment is expected nor asked for.

I don't understand why Mr Help Myself is on here. Why even be on this forum. And your analogies are ridiculous. Maybe move on to another forum if your not contributing anything except insults. Who's Man's is this LOL. Someone come get him. Everyone else have a great day.

[Rizpat]

I'm one of the assholes who tell the younger, better looking providers to increase their rates. Why? Simple. They can't, and shouldn't work for peanuts. To put it bluntly, 90-95% of mongers are fat, old, ugly, and overly hairy. This is based on guys I've seen throughout the years. About half of what I hear through the walls, sounds like 4th grade inbreds. What I read here, and on other sites, is so many guys simply can't afford this hobby. If you were a provider, why would you charge so little to deal with this? I wouldn't. Many of you will be offended, but in my experience, people only get offended when they hear the truth.

LOL at this boomer who thinks providers actually raise their rates bc he wants to mansplain to them how he knows their value more than they do.

[FullyMooned]

I am looking for a provider that's fit, like in very good shape, gives a good deep tissue mAssage and a L1. Is that too much to ask?

[JWankxxx]

I've gotten some mixed input on CLM. I'm only interested in L1 and wouldn't want to book someone who is expecting more action and the tips to match. I can travel but prefer north suburbs (this week that would include Margo, Olivia, Jessica, Salma, Kathy, Mia) or potentially the Milwaukee / Irving park site. Prefer toned athletic figures and easy going personalities. Thanks, Zz.

Hi, I would suggest Salma or Mia off what you prefer.

[ZzTopSterZz]

I saw Margo recently for a short visit. L1 only. She's very nice as a person but not quite my type in terms of looks. Not as well toned as the pics on the site might lead you to believe. Still very nice but I probably won't repeat.

I've gotten some mixed input on CLM. I'm only interested in L1 and wouldn't want to book someone who is expecting more action and the tips to match. I can travel but prefer north suburbs (this week that would include Margo, Olivia, Jessica, Salma, Kathy, Mia) or potentially the Milwaukee / Irving park site. Prefer toned athletic figures and easy going personalities. Thanks, Zz.

[GeneralObvious]

Dude,

If you really do this, knock it off. You are projecting what you would do if you were a provider. Telling a provider they should up their rates is ridiculous, and it hurts the rest of us. Listen, you can always pay them more when you visit and become their favorite tipper ok? But many of us are not old, fat ugly and smelly. You might think you are doing them a favor, and are a white knight, but you're violating the bro code. Many of us pay and tip well, and when added value is there, sometimes we do pay a little more to extend gratitude. What you're doing is telling the restaurant to up their prices, when what I am suggesting is, if the service is better than expected, tip your waitress a little more.

A high quality restaurant knows to charge more than a low quality restaurant. Pizza Hut will always be cheaper than Vito and Nicks. A great looking provider tries to maximize revenue via more customers at lower rates, but working too hard. Thus, adding $20-50, is logical. Most mongers aren't going to walk out over a few bucks. If they do, it means they don't understand economics. Also, as much as I like helping you guys out with good intel, I'm in this hobby to help myself to a great time. Being older, mature I get offered lots of outside time where no payment is expected nor asked for.

[JWankxxx]

I was excited after reading a positive review of this agency here. Booked to see her and drove to the north burbs. Big surprise when she opened the door. Older lady in her mid 30's, natural D cups and on the heavier side. The pictures on the website are not even close representation of her. Face 5/10. Tits 7/10, big but gravity affected them. Ass 5/10.

I don't know if this was Isabel you saw, she was an older Latina? Valerie is a younger Russian girl who I just saw yesterday, she was very pretty & lots of fun.