"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[F Scott]

I just wonder what legal recourse she has to demand a paternity test + financial support after the bills start coming in and she realizes she will need a few hundred thousand to get the kid to age 18.

Lizard,

I'm not entirely sure she knows exactly who I am, but she may. I know there are private detectives out there who can find just about anyone, so I'm under no delusion that I can remain hidden if she really wanted to contact me.

At this exact point, I'm not sure that I wouldn't be willing to help her out if it turns out that her baby is ours. From all I think I know about her, she is not vindictive, and probably really did just want a baby.

[JZLizard]

I'm just having a little trouble making all this lie down comfortably in my head and stop making a rukus.

For all my countless unprotected romps, it is actually incredible to me to realize that I've only had one pregnancy scare in my lifetime, and yes it is a mind-fuck I will never forget (and that's coming from someone who isn't mind-fucked easily). I never want to go through it again.

I hope your theory is correct regarding her motives. There are women out there who will pay good money for sperm when they want a kid, so if the worst of her crimes was getting paid to get spermed, then you probably came out ahead (pun untentional). I just wonder what legal recourse she has to demand a paternity test + financial support after the bills start coming in and she realizes she will need a few hundred thousand to get the kid to age 18. I sincerely hope you escape that part.

[F Scott]

Gentlemen,

I recognize that I promised a recap of my exploits, or lack thereof, some time ago, and I'm glad to see no one was holding his breath LOL! I've finally got some time to catch you all up on a particularly interesting development, I believe, in my career in the Bowl. I know there will be advice, criticism and assorted words of wisdom, but no haters is all I ask.

As many of you remember, I reconnected with my ATF about a year ago, after she left me a year before that for someone else her own age who had suddenly "become significant. " While I was truly devastated, I know these things have a lifespan, and I attempted to move on, semi-successfully.

This was the Monday after Father's Day, 2012, not that I'm keeping a diary or anything. Flash forward almost exactly a year, and out of the blue I get a text from her, saying how much she misses me, how she thinks about me constantly, and how much she wants to get back together! I believe I posted about this when it happened. Of course I was overjoyed, and came running back like a shot, despite the advice of many of you to play it cool and keep a little distance this time. No luck there. It turns out that the "friend" she left me for was not a guy, as I surmised, but another girl, and now she was in a committed lesbian relationship but had been telling the gf about me when the gf suggested that she get back in touch, and had no problem with us resuming a physical relationship!

I was stunned, of course, but not one to look a gift pussy in the ... whatever ... so I readily agreed to a resumption of festivities. It took me a little time to arrange for some unsupervised playtime, but we finally secured a night out, went to dinner, and when I drove her home she pulled me into the back seat, tore open her pantyhose and jumped on little Scottie with vigor, bareback! I know, I know, I have always been the one preaching safety first, but we had had some wine, it was late, we were there, Scottie was in control etc.

She assured me she was on bc, and had been having sex exclusively with her gf, so I thought I was ok. We met a couple of more times, and each time circumstances contrived to get me inside her unsuited, so to speak. By the fourth time, I just assumed everything was ok, and was totally digging it.

A funny thing happened next, which some of you might already be seeing on the horizon, but I sure didn't. She stopped calling, texting or responding to my texts, and when she did, it was always some vague and lame excuse. I began to assume that, as my hero F Scott Fitzgerald wrote, "you can never repeat the past," and reluctantly moved on. I then had a little bit of a medical scare which necessitated me to sell my business and focus on treatment for six months or so, at the end of which my SO and I decided to sell the Big House in the burbs and look for an apartment in the city. I admit I was harboring fantasies of getting back in touch with my ATF once we were installed in our new digs, and on a weekend about two months ago we were walking around the neighborhood where my ATF lives, scouting possible apartments to look at, when who should I see walking towards us but ATF and her gf, and ATF is noticeably pregnant!

Yike, yikes and double yikes! As we four pass each other, and I try very hard to remain on my feet and keep from wetting myself, ATF smiles this sly smile and walks past. When my hearing and vision return in a minute or two, I begin to achieve clarity on the entire situation, which I would like to pose to the assembled brethren for comment. But remember no haters.

Here's what I think happened: ATF gave in to her lesbian nature, which was always somewhat there I have to admit, and dumped yours truly for this new GF. After a year of bliss, she decides that the only thing that would make them happier is a baby, and I don't mean an SB. In vitro being expensive, she thinks around about who she could lure into donating the necessary gametes, and rightly enough hits on me, a guy who was always caring, loving, and who she once did love back, I'm convinced. Getting me to fuck her bareback was child's play, but once the seed was planted, she had no more need for dicks, so it was back to Lesbian Bliss and wait for the blessed event. Needless to say, I have not heard from her since the day I spotted her, and don't believe I ever will.

I know this is all circumstantial conjecture on my part, but it all adds up and makes some kind of sense. I don't know how to feel about it, frankly. On the one hand I'm hurt and pissed, on the other I'm secretly happy that she and I will always have a bond, on the third hand unless she allows it at some point, I will probably never see this child, on the fourth hand maybe I should be happy about that, on the fifth hand I think I might like to, since while in the depths of my obsession with her I did fantasize about ruining my life and running away with her, on the sixth hand I don't know for certain it's mine. I'm just having a little trouble making all this lie down comfortably in my head and stop making a rukus.

In the meantime, things are starting to normalize on the Homefront, so I am back in the Bowl and having a blast. I'll save those details for another post, but suffice it to say I'm glad to have reactivated my membership in the Clubhouse, and look forward to your comments and posts in the future.

BTW. For those of you who remember, nothing ultimately came of Hot Yoga Babe, though we did make out in her car after class one evening. I think she couldn't handle the thought of a married guy, or maybe I just didn't impress her with my kissing ability. Nah!

Peace to you all, my brothers, and do no harm!

Scott.

[Beachesnole02]

So, I have been wasting away, my favorite, the translator has left the country and won't be back for another month, when out of the blue I get an email from one I wrote off earlier this year. Said she was ready, so we are supposed to meet and complete today. Judging by the pics she sent, she looks ready (kept the nude for myself.).

[HollywoodGuy]

Due to the graphic nature of these pics, I put them in the "Sugar Daddy Sites" thread.

These pics are rated TV-MA and contain the following sub-rating, S for mature audiences only.

Likes baby girl role play. Total damage, the cost of the room.

http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/sh...07885&posted=1#post2207885.

[HollywoodGuy]

Date # 2 with my current SD4M UTR went well. It started out with her asking for $$$$ LOL. I told her I wasn't sure where she got that from as I had only given her $ for the first date. So I told her, here's your $ and if you want to throw me out now, No Problem. That didn't happen. So we spent the next hour playing and talking before she had to go to work. I dropped her off and then went home.

She is one of the now, many many girls playing the UTR game by only posting on the SD sites like they are semi innocent college students. Which she is (a student that is). We talked about a lot of things, and like many girls in her situation she doesn't really have anyone to hang out with in between work, school, and working the SD sites. I told her I would be happy to pick her up from school or see her on her day off, and go invisible when the big spenders show up.

I also told her, you've got to have some fun on this job, (and being a working UTR is a job). So it might as well be me. She agreed that $$ was the standard for someone with her looks but agreed to keep taking the $ for now. She does have two guys paying like 4 to 5 bills a visit (that she met on the SD site), but admitted they aren't regular enough to help her get where she is trying to go. And definitely don't have enough game to be considered a fun date.

I realize this is an SB thread but UTR's are now fully one third of all the good looking girls on SD4M in my area. Obviously there are advantages and disadvantages to dating a UTR. The main advantage is the quality of the sex. I have dated enough SB's to know that the quality can vary widely in the bedroom. You are trading a bit of that sometimes for the exclusivity of the arrangement. A true SB is a serial monogamist. So the safety factor as far as STD's is pretty high. With a UTR you may have a girl dating as many as 5 guys regularly, not counting random dates.

But most UTR girls are at least an 8 in the skills dept. And many are 9's and 10's. If you are a high volume dater like me it's not that easy to have enough true SB's (for a $ a visit) with awesome skills, that are in rotation and be able to fill out the whole week. Especially when they are limited to about one visit per week. Also an SB with 9+ looks who knows she is a 9+ in the bedroom is usually going to want more than a $ a visit. So there just arent enough of them to fill out my schedule. I like variety, so this is a good alternate solution for me while I look for the NP first timers.

[Member #5055]

If any of the local guys have any reasonable petite lady anywhere near Lake An*na? Up there quite a bit and it is a desert!

PM me.

Regards.

GW.

P.S. or Oran*ge - or Lou*isa or Spotsy*lvania !!

[Nerd29]

I have advanced a little money a few times in the past and only got burned once. Fortunately it was only $100. But, what I have learned from doing that is if you do it once, they will always have an emergency and need you to advance them. I no longer do that and discuss this at the M&G if it looks like we will proceed to the FC. It never ends with those type of girls.

I should have stuck to my own rule of not providing without receiving. I thought this might have been that little push needed to cross the barrier. Oh well, sometimes a calculated risk pays off and other times, not so much.

[FyrGuy33]

I had been texting and emailing a POT for about a month as she was pretty nervous about meeting and seemed to be in and out of a bad relationship. I get a text with the standard "I really hate to ask you this but. " Well she needed a little bit of money and asked if I could help her out. I weighed the pros and cons and decided to meet her that afternoon and give her $. 6 as a down payment. She seemed super happy and we talked about meeting the next day. So fast forward a day and I send her a text letting her know I was in my way to our planned meeting spot. She texts back about 30 minutes later asking if I was there and she was trying to get another $. 4 from her uncle. Another 30 minutes go by and she sends another text saying she could not make it because she did not want to get pulled over for not having current insurance on her car. I tell her no worries and go silent. 2 days later she sends a text asking where I have been and why I have not talked to her. I send a simple response saying I was disappointed in her backing out of our meet and it gives me serious doubt I can trust her to keep her word especially since I already helped her out some with money. Never heard back. Oh well. I really did want to go FC with this one as I had a lot of time invested and she was super cute.

I will be visiting Manhattan for 11 days for work and if anyone has any leads in that area pm me with any information you are willing to provide.

Thanks! And happy hunting!

I have advanced a little money a few times in the past and only got burned once. Fortunately it was only $100. But, what I have learned from doing that is if you do it once, they will always have an emergency and need you to advance them. I no longer do that and discuss this at the M&G if it looks like we will proceed to the FC. It never ends with those type of girls.

[FyrGuy33]

Not sure of the Nando number -- but I would run from this one -- reeks of a woman wanting to get her hooks into you. Keep your personal info VERY secret. This type do not take rejection well!

I agree, RUN. One thing you need to understand is that we are in the SD / SB relationship because we do not want to settle for less. I am like you with the smoking thing. I never would have gotten past a couple of cocktails because of that. You need to cut her loose before you get too involved. While you did well value wise, if she is not meeting all of your expectations, just say "NEXT". There are far too many others in the sugar bowl. Since you have just started with this, I would suggest you spend the time enjoying every M&G you can. Remember, you are interviewing them, not the other way around. I personally make it a policy to not go to the FC on the first date. This gives me the opportunity to let the big head make the decision. Also, there is no reason to wine and dine them. Spend a pile of cash on the M&G and they get in their head you are an ATM. Good luck with your hunting, and be safe.

[HollywoodGuy]

Hollywood, I ask because I had one SB for about a month and realized we weren't a good fit afterall. When I told her that we were done She became sort of hostile and made noises like she was totally invested in the relationship and that I couldn't just walk away. The money I spent was too small to take care of all her bills so who knows what was going on.

So your relationship, despite her low expenses, makes me curious how an arrangement that long goes over with the SB.

Thank you as always for your time and wisdom.

We had many conversations over the months about picking it up in the bedroom, all to no avail. There were many magic moments but not enough to sustain the relationship. For me every time has to be an over the top experience or why am I there? She knew the handwriting was on the wall and I bonus-ed her at the end so she would have nothing to complain about. She said she was totally devoted to me during our time together, and that was true.

I knew from the beginning I was going to have to try to push her limits. I did try but failed. I was very clear that the break up was over sex. And most are either over sex or money. I always paid the agreed upon amount no matter how often we hooked up. It started out at 8 times a month and ended up at 4 times a month. Way over my budget. So there really was no mystery and I gave her every chance to get up to speed. She can easily find someone to pay more and she knows it. She is also debt free and fully employed, so there is really no need for any drama. And there isn't any.

In civi dating you sometimes have to take what you can get, but not in the sugar world.

[SpiceOfLife]

Not sure of the Nando number -- but I would run from this one -- reeks of a woman wanting to get her hooks into you. Keep your personal info VERY secret. This type do not take rejection well!

No, my sugar was $$. But with food / drinks / hotel / wine etc I actually spent close to $500. There are other costs to be factored in and I will have to learn to lessen those other costs. $$ a date I can handle, especially if we're together 5 hours + like we were, but I wanted to impress so I went over and above. My fault on that one, but as I was watching my funds diminish I realized I can't blow money like that on every date. She wasn't asking for more than drinks, and wasn't prepared to go to the FC either but I'm very charming.

SOL.

[Rouleur]

So after 18 months with my 20 year old princess I had to pull the plug. I had her on a 1 k a month allowance and she averaged 2 k a month on her job.

Since she lived at home and paid no rent her progress from having nothing when I met her to having all the basics is now complete.

She was my version of a 10/10 but never achieved the skill level in the FC to keep it going. Its too bad and a little sad, but the time and energy plus the funds just didn't add up anymore.

Since she was my professed GF, I am now officially single again so to speak. And like JL says someone has to be the boss, and I was definitely not in total control anymore so I had to give it up. Sb creep had settled in and my CPO was way off base. Every current girl I am seeing is at a strict $ per date or less (and this includes any all extras like rooms or food, excluding gas). This is going to make a big change in my ability to play and save for the rest of the year.

So yes, I do pay very little in cash but a lot in mentoring, emotional attachment, etc.

Hollywood, I ask because I had one SB for about a month and realized we weren't a good fit afterall. When I told her that we were done She became sort of hostile and made noises like she was totally invested in the relationship and that I couldn't just walk away. The money I spent was too small to take care of all her bills so who knows what was going on.

So your relationship, despite her low expenses, makes me curious how an arrangement that long goes over with the SB.

Thank you as always for your time and wisdom.

[WalkAwayJoe]

I've been looking every where for a sd, but no luck 423XXX327 zero, I can send pictures <3.

[Member #5055]

Not sure of the Nando number -- but I would run from this one -- reeks of a woman wanting to get her hooks into you. Keep your personal info VERY secret. This type do not take rejection well!

So my very first M&G went well IMO. Met my sexy blonde 30 y / o, we had drinks, flirted a lot and then I asked if she wanted to get a room. Neither of us were particularly expecting a trip to the FC but being a good boy scout I was prepared. She hadn't had sex in almost 2 years, was very sensitive and came easily and loudly. So I now have my first SB and we'll see where it goes from here. It's a first time experience for both of us and lots of fun. However, she was adamant about not getting naked until I committed to her as my only SB before the deed, which of course I did. She is my only SB "at this time" but I have another M&G set up for today that I don't expect to go to the FC and I'll make a decision on who I want to be with for now. I don't think she understands that this type of relationship is supposed to be transitional and isn't a long-term commitment. I'm just starting to have fun and I want to see what's out there. Next date I'm going to explain in further detail exactly how this works. I don't want her to feel like I used her and threw her to the side. I like her too much for that. But, there were some red flags last night, and I probably should have avoided the FC on the first date with this one but the call of the FC was too strong.

Red Flags: I only have ever dated non-smokers and picked her profile specifically because she didn't smoke, so imaging my surprise when she showed up with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth. The smell of it actually turns me off so much that I had a hard time keeping an erection, although I did manage 2 pops.

She has expensive tastes in jewelry, purses, etc. But had zero money on her even though she owns a legitimate small business.

She is already making long-term dating plans based on the fact that we did the deed. I came into this SD thing wanting to meet as many women as I could. I'm not looking for monogamy.

My starting budget is probably in the $1 k / month range, but with the date, some sugar, gas, hotel room, wine, etc. I racked up well over $400 which will mean 2-3 dates per month MAX and that doesn't allow for other M&Gs to bolster my future rotation. I still have half a dozen women that I'm interested in looking to meet me. I guess I'll commit to this one somewhat as I learn the ropes, set some rules and see what happens.

SOL.