Massage Parlor Reports

**MeridianTime** · 12-23-25 16:45

I was at Blue Jade last Tuesday with Yummi. The session was really good until a fire marshal showed up to do an inspection. From the security monitor he looked like a police officer so I quickly got dressed and ready to leave quickly. Thankfully it was just a fire marshal but it did scare me a little bit to be honest. I guess it's the chance we take for the experience. I am addicted to the hobby so I will carry on.

**HifiMan** · 12-22-25 23:38

Originally Posted by D2K7519 [View Original Post]

In one ear and out the other. No money, no honey. Hahaha. I don't believe half the shit these girls tell me as I'm most definitely sure they tell everyone the same thing.

I'm second to that. Or whatever you like to hear and make you feel like a cash king. Remember King of cash don't get real about it hahaha.

**Taycation** · 12-22-25 22:23

[Deleted by Admin]

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**JackOat11** · 12-22-25 21:52

Originally Posted by JackOat11 [View Original Post]

Looks like I might have accidentally broken a rule with a previous post as it didn't get posted. Hoping one of you cool kids can share with me an "open minded" location between woodinville and maple valley tonight. It's my last chance before I head back to the wasteland that is Saint Louis and this is the only 2 hour period I could escape the family. I miss Seattle so much but it has changed. Not a big fan of latex but that's not a dealbreaker either. Feel free to DM me if the board won't appreciate this post. If anyone has to come out to Saint Louis sometime I will gladly connect you to "wonderful days".

Thank you legends in advance.

Damn, nothing? Leaving my friends house in an hour. Could really use a suggestion. I know guys want to keep their regular things somewhat secret but isn't this the whole page about helping the homies out? Just need something not too far off the path from Woodinville to maple valley. Renton would be ideal.

**JackOat11** · 12-22-25 19:13

Originally Posted by KrDoggy [View Original Post]

Blue Jade not far either but I think of it as "Central", along with Renton and JM in Georgetown.

Looks like I might have accidentally broken a rule with a previous post as it didn't get posted. Hoping one of you cool kids can share with me an "open minded" location between woodinville and maple valley tonight. It's my last chance before I head back to the wasteland that is Saint Louis and this is the only 2 hour period I could escape the family. I miss Seattle so much but it has changed. Not a big fan of latex but that's not a dealbreaker either. Feel free to DM me if the board won't appreciate this post. If anyone has to come out to Saint Louis sometime I will gladly connect you to "wonderful days".

Thank you legends in advance.

**JackOat11** · 12-22-25 18:48

Gents,

This is a selfish post but if you ever get to Saint Louis DM me and I can hook you up with our extremely limited options there.

I've got a very limited time schedule away from the family. Will have a about an hour on my "way back " from Woodinville to maple valley. I need to sample a tight spinner Asian since we are lacking in St. Louis. I leave tomorrow. Please help me. Somewhere along that path I would love to find a hottie to give me the Seattle experience. BBFS is preferred but I can live with CFS if I have to as long as she's hot and tight. A reply here would be great or a DM as well. I've got 3 hours to figure it out. Thanks in advance.

**Member #7059** · 12-22-25 17:19

Originally Posted by Mayoigo86 [View Original Post]

Exactly! Shit. No lie man, today I had a girl tell me I was number number number one. Yeah, that's right 3 so it must be true. LOL and even gave me a thumbs up! Now I didn't believe her after the first three number ones, but as soon as she gave me the thumbs up, I knew she was telling me the truth. And she told me I was so strong so I know I have to be the strongest man out there because there's no way she's telling everyone that. Haha.

You are so funny dude! Exactly. Well I think we beat this horse dead. Now go out there and Monger on! I already got my next victim on my crosshairs for tonight. Or tomorrow night. I usually don't do reviews but I'm having fun so far so I might report back. Stay tuned. Hahaha.

**HappyXxx** · 12-22-25 17:15

Originally Posted by KrDoggy [View Original Post]

Just don't let them call you Lao Gong. Then you are a goner. No more massage, expensive gifts expected, sex gets more rote, can't see other women. I have yet to understand the upside.

That's pretty funny, yeah once they call you that which for those of you who don't know what that means (HUSBAND) then it's over from there. But if they call you shenjingbing or Shabi then you have nothing to worry about. Lmao.

**Mayoigo86** · 12-22-25 17:07

Originally Posted by D2K7519 [View Original Post]

In one ear and out the other. No money, no honey. Hahaha. I don't believe half the shit these girls tell me as I'm most definitely sure they tell everyone the same thing.

Exactly! Shit. No lie man, today I had a girl tell me I was number number number one. Yeah, that's right 3 so it must be true. LOL and even gave me a thumbs up! Now I didn't believe her after the first three number ones, but as soon as she gave me the thumbs up, I knew she was telling me the truth. And she told me I was so strong so I know I have to be the strongest man out there because there's no way she's telling everyone that. Haha.

**Member #7059** · 12-22-25 17:01

Originally Posted by KrDoggy [View Original Post]

Just don't let them call you Lao Gong. Then you are a goner. No more massage, expensive gifts expected, sex gets more rote, can't see other women. I have yet to understand the upside.

The girls who want to be my girlfriend, want me to see just them. No way Jose, I'm not going to just see you while you get slammed by a bunch of dudes. So sorry, homie don't play that. I reject them but they keep asking me to give them the D2 K pounding special. Hahaha. Of course, money talks and BS walks. No money no honey mentality all the way!

**KrDoggy** · 12-22-25 16:44

Just don't let them call you Lao Gong. Then you are a goner. No more massage, expensive gifts expected, sex gets more rote, can't see other women. I have yet to understand the upside.

Originally Posted by D2K7519 [View Original Post]

In one ear and out the other. No money, no honey. Hahaha. I don't believe half the shit these girls tell me as I'm most definitely sure they tell everyone the same thing.

**Member #7059** · 12-22-25 16:25

Originally Posted by Mayoigo86 [View Original Post]

Well, another good review for Kelly and although they can't all be ATF it sounds like she was pretty damn good. I'm still thinking about my last session with that girl! Like you said that body is insane and not a tighter box out there

Oh, I hope this doesn't hurt any feelings, but remember we are all handsome, and we are all Superman and all number one. LOL. Every one of us are! As long as you're pulling that green out of your pocket, you will always remain the best, the most handsome, and number one. Haha.

Try not tipping them good or haggling on the price and see how handsome you are next time you go inlol

In one ear and out the other. No money, no honey. Hahaha. I don't believe half the shit these girls tell me as I'm most definitely sure they tell everyone the same thing.

**Mayoigo86** · 12-22-25 15:30

Originally Posted by D2K7519 [View Original Post]

So, after reading all the great reviews on Kelly, I decided to put her skills and reviews to the test. Angela and Blue were great and are Mega-Superstars. The best of the superstars, I've been mongering for over 30 years, believe me I know what I'm talking about. I can't wait till Angela gets back this month as you all already know. Angela will be back before the end of this month and work all month in January unless all of you don't keep her busy is what she told me. Now Kelly, she did provide good service, but it wasn't great like her reviews claimed at least not in my session.

So, I get there to my appointment and it seems I'm the only soul present late at night. Chloe opened the door, and she was pretty, but I wouldn't call her beautiful. She asks who I'm there to see, and I ask what's her name. As I don't want to get the old switcheroo routine. She tells me her name is Chloe, so I say I'm here for Kelly. She calls for Kelly who is apparently in the girl's lounge relaxing. I ask to use the bathroom as I had a long drive getting to the shop, and as I pass to use the bathroom, I see Kelly in the girls' lounge. Wow, the quick glimpse of Kelly was as described in her reviews. She was beautiful.

So, I come out the bathroom, and Kelly is waiting in the hallway and guides me to the room. Once in the room, I get a better look at her and she is beautiful. Drop dead gorgeous. I'm in love boys. Hahaha. I would say that she almost looks like Sarah, who is supposedly Rachel / Fia's sister. She spoke English very well which I was surprised, and she was also friendly. I give her the donation, and she leaves the room. I get undressed and lay on the table facing up with the pillow underneath my head as usual. I don't play around as I'm ready to take this gorgeous girl to pound town. She returns and her clothes come off, and she has a fit body with a very firm plumpy ass which I did like a lot and kept grabbing. Holy guacamole Batman, I couldn't keep my hands and eyes off her round and firm ass. I mean it wasn't huge, but it was nice and round and firm. I was just mesmerized how fit and firm her whole body was, especially her ass. I get up and start kissing and grabbing her tits which felt natural to me. Not too big but just right. I keep grabbing that plumpy and firm ass of hers, I just couldn't get enough..

Well, another good review for Kelly and although they can't all be ATF it sounds like she was pretty damn good. I'm still thinking about my last session with that girl! Like you said that body is insane and not a tighter box out there

Oh, I hope this doesn't hurt any feelings, but remember we are all handsome, and we are all Superman and all number one. LOL. Every one of us are! As long as you're pulling that green out of your pocket, you will always remain the best, the most handsome, and number one. Haha.

Try not tipping them good or haggling on the price and see how handsome you are next time you go in…lol

**KrDoggy** · 12-22-25 15:20

I obviously tend towards the more boyfriend-like interactions, but I have learned the hard way not to fall for them. You get turned into a puddle of goo in no time.

Originally Posted by Taycation [View Original Post]

Boyfriend: "Hey babe, how was work today?

Her: "Busy, I had to give so many blowjobs!

Boyfriend: ". . . . . (awkward pause). . . . Cool."