Massage Parlor Reports

[YellowJacket]

Take a break for a week and see if that helps. I give that advice for free.

Call your urologist, and yes every male of poking age should have one. Tell him the pills don't work. You want to try alprostadil, calverject or sometimes it's called trimix. A tiny needle injects meds in the lower shaft of your penis. In 10 minutes you are harder, and fuller than you have ever been. May add 1/4 in length you are so hard. It lasts about two hours. If you have the strength and stamina you can cum as many times as you are able and still remain hard. I have been using this med for about 10 years. Will never use pills again. Look it up. You never have to worry about losing your hardness, you are at attention for as long as you want to be during the deed. Don't let erection last more than 4 hours, they also sell the deflate med if you need it. It costs about $125 bucks shipped to your door. A bottle lasts me about 3 months and that's using 3-4 times a week. This is strong stuff, you will never ever go back to the pills.

[BorntoDive]

Midnight, what are you doing man? This site is about pussy, ****, coochie, cookie, funky-stuff, etc.

I believe this comment was somewhat facetious. But it does bring up an interesting question. What is the purpose of the forum.

Some might take the Joe Friday approach. Just the facts. Where did you go? Who did you see? What did she look like? What did you do? And my favorite how much?

I have always been more philosophical. We all share a common hobby and we approach it from different histories and perspective. Some of the older guys may have similar problems (the dreaded ED). The married guys may face similar obstacles (how do I sneak off for a couple of hours). And as Rub's post acknowledges we are all going to die. In my case I face all three challenges. So I view the forum as a place to share our common humanity and personal perversions. And if some posts veer off from the Joe Friday approach, then ignore and read on. The next post may give you just the juicy facts.

[Rub101]

BorntoDive brought up the subject of how long he has left; I responded accordingly.

I thought I was the long-winded one. I was the one snickering for a little bit, LOL.

[Midnightpass]

Midnight, what are you doing man? This site is about pussy, ****, coochie, cookie, funky-stuff, etc.

BorntoDive brought up the subject of how long he has left; I responded accordingly.

[Rub101]

Dear Mr. Grim Reaper:

Unlike most of the communications you receive, this one isn't a complaint, but a compliment. Anyone repeatedly collecting 4-year-old cancer victims for coffins isn't going to win any popularity contests among the living, but the inevitability of your arrival is oddly comforting. The old clich that you can't avoid death and taxes isn't true. You can avoid taxes if you pay the right people enough money. You, sir, are unavoidable.

Your inevitability helped make my decision to finally tap into my Individual Retirement Account, at age 70, much easier. I needed the help. It's been a one-way street for the last 55 years or so; taking money out is counterintuitive, but after one does the math, it makes more sense. I must make an educated guess as to when you'll arrive and spend accordingly. I did the same thing when I decided to take my Social Security benefits at 68 instead of waiting for the higher benefits had I delayed and taken them now.

Far be it from me to tell a body collector how to do his job, but were I you, I'd look for some lower hanging fruit than me. I'm doing nearly everything I can to make your job as difficult as possible. I've never smoked, and have seriously cut back on drinking alcohol, smoke about 3 joints a year, run / walk the beach nearly every day with warm-up pushups and sit-ups before and more afterward. I've got regular appointments with my dentist, sleep doctor, urologist, dermatologist, and general practitioner all doing their best to keep me here as long as they can. I've dropped 20 pounds since I started the ZepBound weight loss drug.

I can hear you snickering. Sure, you can conspire with Satan to have a drunk driver T-bone the driver's side door of my minivan right after I finish typing this and am on my way to my writers' group. Maybe the air bags don't go off that time. Other than paying a bit more attention and taking care of myself, there's not a lot I can do to stop you two. I'm good with that. It's been a great life and I'm ready for check-out anytime you are.

My grandmother was the single biggest female influence in my life. I remember being about 12 years old when it hit me that it was almost a certainty that you would take her before me. At that moment, I decided to mentally prepare. It worked really well. About 40 years later, as she lay unconscious, you took her about a week after the hospice people stopped feeding her; they said starvation was painless and I chose to believe them. I'm doing the same mentally for myself now as it was so comforting then. You're like an old friend that I've known for a very long time but have never met.

I'm betting you're not happy the way you're portrayed what with that dark baggy robe, the hood covering your face, and the cliched scythe in your hand. What the hell is that for, please? The killin's been done before your arrival. You're more like the UPS man picking up a package for delivery. Maybe we'll get you a crisp brown uniform, a nice cap, put a smile on your face and a twinkle in your eye in your new incantation.

It's possible you have minions who make your job more efficient and bearable for those of us going along for our final ride. Thirty-two years ago, when I was 38, my 48-year-old brother died of a brain tumor. Several months later, I had one of those vivid Technicolor dreams where he pulled up next to me in a white convertible Buick that I knew he'd totaled years earlier. "Larry? I exclaimed. He looked great. All his black hair was back; the steroids and chemo took it all before he died. "Get in" he said. He looked at my perplexed face and explained that I had just been in a fatal car accident. As soon as my ass hit his car seat, I woke up.

Again Grim (May I call you by your first name, or am I being too familiar? I'm not trying to tell you how to do the job you've been doing for eons, however, asking a close relative to make a pick-up for a name on your list seems to be not only efficient, but kind and welcoming. Even those of us prepared may be a tad apprehensive about this one-way trip.

My parent's deaths aren't going to be a good indicator of mine as my dad was a heavy smoker all his life. Widowmaker in the bathtub at 72 isn't a bad way to go. My mom never smoked, but apparently false teeth contribute to throat cancer which took her at 82 or so. My teeth are fine, and I pay to keep them that way. I picture you tapping your foot impatiently as the useless radiation treatments keep the meter running in your death cab. Expensive and not just monetarily. An inability to eat and speak seems an awfully high price for another couple months of misery. My stepdad insisted she fight you, but I forgive him for it. You are undefeated in all of time. Why is this so hard to comprehend?

I doubt you take requests judging by how unfairly, quickly, and arbitrarily you collect some while leaving others to suffer that should have gone immediately. I'm hoping for a 5 or 10 second window where I know it's over. Like missing a curve on a road with a cliff and no guardrail at full speed, Thelma and Louise style. Pinned in a burning car? Not so much. See what you can do, please. Thanks, and see you soon. Relatively speaking, of course.

Midnight, what are you doing man? This site is about pussy, ****, coochie, cookie, funky-stuff, etc.

[Rub101]

I'm early 70's and a frequent Thailand traveler. As recently as several months ago I was doing almost daily sessions. But suddenly, I struggle to finish sessions every second day, even with a full dose of ED meds while inside a hottie. To make matters worse, I need DFK, BBBJ starter, and I can only finish with BBFSCIP, which is available from about half the Thailand providers. Cannot even get started if she isn't attractive to me. If she is loose down under, I cannot finish. Not sure how much longer it will be worth making the horrible flights to Thailand.

Meanwhile, I have a friend in his middle 80's who still uses condom without ED meds. He can barely walk, but he can have sex weekly, finances permitting.

Take a break for a week and see if that helps. I give that advice for free.

[AmazingRoot56]

You know how perfect the AI porn girls are? Like too perfect? Well that's the problem you're going to have when Kimmie, 24, is riding you cowgirl. It's almost like you go into denial, except your dick is telling you it's really happening.

The table shower couldn't have been much better; TUMA included. She enjoyed some DATY back in the room and even let me play with that cute little Chinese butthole. She wouldn't take an extra $50.00 for Greek, but maybe a hundred would have done it. Finished in her mouth. Nice GFE, plenty of kissing, and not rushed. She'll only be there another couple weeks.

$260.00 total and a great value. I'll repeat.

How was she built? Big booty? Double D? I'm in Orlando & would appreciate the info.

[BorntoDive]

Menopause must just totally wreck the hormones of most women. Mine also TOTALLY lost interest sometime after menopause. She even said outright that she just has no sexual desire AT ALL any longer! OMG!

In my particular case, I've noticed my desire, stamina, and sheer ability diminishing greatly over the last couple of years. Even the ED meds I have available (all 3 of the major products) don't seem to help the way they used to, so I'm not sure how much "better" they're getting ... at least not for me!

Total shutdown sucks. My Mrs. Is not that bad. But it is just not like the good old days when she had intense orgasms through oral. When she would moan and scream and the body shake it was such a turn on. It was like rocket fuel to the boner. She still enjoys herself when in the mood. But she is not in the mood very often. And if I have to beg or nag it is just not fun. The working girl experience is different but at least it is there when I want it.

As far as the meds go I have used both Viagra and Cialis for close to 30 years. They have definitely been less effective in the last five. Supposedly Viagra has a new formula that is supposed to be stronger but I have not tried it. About three years ago I switched to alprostadil. It is most commonly available as Trimix but my urologist prescribed Quadmix. Just different formulas. You have to inject into penis with small insulin needle. That freaks out a lot of guys. But honestly you don't feel a thing. So for most guys you will get a raging hardon in minutes. Most serious side effect is a boner that won't quit for four hours or so. That can be painful and dangerous and requires an ER visit. But I never had any problems. For me erection is 60-90 minutes. There is quite a bit of info on internet about this product if you were interested. But I would recommend if the pills stopped working.

[Midnightpass]

You know how perfect the AI porn girls are? Like too perfect? Well that's the problem you're going to have when Kimmie, 24, is riding you cowgirl. It's almost like you go into denial, except your dick is telling you it's really happening.

The table shower couldn't have been much better; TUMA included. She enjoyed some DATY back in the room and even let me play with that cute little Chinese butthole. She wouldn't take an extra $50.00 for Greek, but maybe a hundred would have done it. Finished in her mouth. Nice GFE, plenty of kissing, and not rushed. She'll only be there another couple weeks.

$260.00 total and a great value. I'll repeat.

[Horsetrader]

From my discussions with others, each of us varies greatly from one guy to another. I know one guy that's about 7-8 years younger than me that is hitting AMP's, or even rubbing one out, at a frequency that I couldn't possibly have maintained at that age. Then I know OF another that's still going to AMPs at least once a month at the age of 87, or so, although his experiences reportedly don't always culminate in a glorious "finish". Meanwhile another acquaintance is about 73 and really struggles in any session... which are only occurring 4 or 5 times a year at this point. In my particular case, I've noticed my desire, stamina, and sheer ability diminishing greatly over the last couple of years. Even the ED meds I have available (all 3 of the major products) don't seem to help the way they used to, so I'm not sure how much "better" they're getting ... at least not for me!

I'm early 70's and a frequent Thailand traveler. As recently as several months ago I was doing almost daily sessions. But suddenly, I struggle to finish sessions every second day, even with a full dose of ED meds while inside a hottie. To make matters worse, I need DFK, BBBJ starter, and I can only finish with BBFSCIP, which is available from about half the Thailand providers. Cannot even get started if she isn't attractive to me. If she is loose down under, I cannot finish. Not sure how much longer it will be worth making the horrible flights to Thailand.

Meanwhile, I have a friend in his middle 80's who still uses condom without ED meds. He can barely walk, but he can have sex weekly, finances permitting.

[Dr Willy]

(...) when the Mrs went through menopause she just seemed to lose interest. That probably pushed me back into the field.

I hate when that happens! Menopause must just totally wreck the hormones of most women. Mine also TOTALLY lost interest sometime after menopause. She even said outright that she just has no sexual desire AT ALL any longer! OMG! I'm standing there with my dick in my hand (metaphorically) and was just dumbfounded that she could say that to me and NOT expect me to "look elsewhere." In my case, that wasn't any sort of tipping point, as I've been practicing in this hobby pretty steadily for over 45 years ... in spite of being married for most of that time. But still! ... I just remain flabbergasted that a women's sex-drive apparently has such a dramatic OFF-Switch like that.

But the other thing that continues to play on my mind as I turned 70 is how many years do I really have left. So when another poster volunteers he is still at it at 77 I am delighted to read. I still got a future! (...) I plan to keep trucking for many years to come. You should too. And the damn ED meds keep getting better.

From my discussions with others, each of us varies greatly from one guy to another. I know one guy that's about 7-8 years younger than me that is hitting AMP's, or even rubbing one out, at a frequency that I couldn't possibly have maintained at that age. Then I know OF another that's still going to AMPs at least once a month at the age of 87, or so, although his experiences reportedly don't always culminate in a glorious "finish". Meanwhile another acquaintance is about 73 and really struggles in any session... which are only occurring 4 or 5 times a year at this point. In my particular case, I've noticed my desire, stamina, and sheer ability diminishing greatly over the last couple of years. Even the ED meds I have available (all 3 of the major products) don't seem to help the way they used to, so I'm not sure how much "better" they're getting ... at least not for me!

As they say, getting old sucks, but the alternative is always worse!

[BorntoDive]

I can hear you snickering. Sure, you can conspire with Satan to have a drunk driver T-bone the driver's side door of my minivan right after I finish typing this and am on my way to my writers' group.

The writers group must be paying off. Very entertaining. I hope GR leaves you alone for many years to come.

[Stash4488]

Saw Judy today, she said she was leaving tomorrow 11/20 to go back home.

Lucy and Amy are now at Stone.

[Midnightpass]

But the other thing that continues to play on my mind as I turned 70 is how many years do I really have left. So when another poster volunteers he is still at it at 77 I am delighted to read. I still got a future!

But I am actually in pretty decent shape and most people cannot believe my age when I tell them. On the other hand if you pulled up to the local AMP in one of those vans that chauffeur around those too old to drive and shuffled into the parlor with your walker and oxygen tank well then maybe the mamasan might suggest you go elsewhere. They probably don't need any fatalities. If I ever get that bad, I told my kids to put me out of my misery.

Dear Mr. Grim Reaper:

Unlike most of the communications you receive, this one isn't a complaint, but a compliment. Anyone repeatedly collecting 4-year-old cancer victims for coffins isn't going to win any popularity contests among the living, but the inevitability of your arrival is oddly comforting. The old cliché that you can't avoid death and taxes isn't true. You can avoid taxes if you pay the right people enough money. You, sir, are unavoidable.

Your inevitability helped make my decision to finally tap into my Individual Retirement Account, at age 70, much easier. I needed the help. It's been a one-way street for the last 55 years or so; taking money out is counterintuitive, but after one does the math, it makes more sense. I must make an educated guess as to when you'll arrive and spend accordingly. I did the same thing when I decided to take my Social Security benefits at 68 instead of waiting for the higher benefits had I delayed and taken them now.

Far be it from me to tell a body collector how to do his job, but were I you, I'd look for some lower hanging fruit than me. I'm doing nearly everything I can to make your job as difficult as possible. I've never smoked, and have seriously cut back on drinking alcohol, smoke about 3 joints a year, run / walk the beach nearly every day with warm-up pushups and sit-ups before and more afterward. I've got regular appointments with my dentist, sleep doctor, urologist, dermatologist, and general practitioner all doing their best to keep me here as long as they can. I've dropped 20 pounds since I started the ZepBound weight loss drug.

I can hear you snickering. Sure, you can conspire with Satan to have a drunk driver T-bone the driver's side door of my minivan right after I finish typing this and am on my way to my writers' group. Maybe the air bags don't go off that time. Other than paying a bit more attention and taking care of myself, there's not a lot I can do to stop you two. I'm good with that. It's been a great life and I'm ready for check-out anytime you are.

My grandmother was the single biggest female influence in my life. I remember being about 12 years old when it hit me that it was almost a certainty that you would take her before me. At that moment, I decided to mentally prepare. It worked really well. About 40 years later, as she lay unconscious, you took her about a week after the hospice people stopped feeding her; they said starvation was painless and I chose to believe them. I'm doing the same mentally for myself now as it was so comforting then. You're like an old friend that I've known for a very long time but have never met.

I'm betting you're not happy the way you're portrayed what with that dark baggy robe, the hood covering your face, and the cliched scythe in your hand. What the hell is that for, please? The killin's been done before your arrival. You're more like the UPS man picking up a package for delivery. Maybe we'll get you a crisp brown uniform, a nice cap, put a smile on your face and a twinkle in your eye in your new incantation.

It's possible you have minions who make your job more efficient and bearable for those of us going along for our final ride. Thirty-two years ago, when I was 38, my 48-year-old brother died of a brain tumor. Several months later, I had one of those vivid Technicolor dreams where he pulled up next to me in a white convertible Buick that I knew he'd totaled years earlier. "Larry? I exclaimed. He looked great. All his black hair was back; the steroids and chemo took it all before he died. "Get in" he said. He looked at my perplexed face and explained that I had just been in a fatal car accident. As soon as my ass hit his car seat, I woke up.

Again Grim (May I call you by your first name, or am I being too familiar? I'm not trying to tell you how to do the job you've been doing for eons, however, asking a close relative to make a pick-up for a name on your list seems to be not only efficient, but kind and welcoming. Even those of us prepared may be a tad apprehensive about this one-way trip.

My parent's deaths aren't going to be a good indicator of mine as my dad was a heavy smoker all his life. Widowmaker in the bathtub at 72 isn't a bad way to go. My mom never smoked, but apparently false teeth contribute to throat cancer which took her at 82 or so. My teeth are fine, and I pay to keep them that way. I picture you tapping your foot impatiently as the useless radiation treatments keep the meter running in your death cab. Expensive and not just monetarily. An inability to eat and speak seems an awfully high price for another couple months of misery. My stepdad insisted she fight you, but I forgive him for it. You are undefeated in all of time. Why is this so hard to comprehend?

I doubt you take requests judging by how unfairly, quickly, and arbitrarily you collect some while leaving others to suffer that should have gone immediately. I'm hoping for a 5 or 10 second window where I know it's over. Like missing a curve on a road with a cliff and no guardrail at full speed, Thelma and Louise style. Pinned in a burning car? Not so much. See what you can do, please. Thanks, and see you soon. Relatively speaking, of course.

[Bearing100]

I can't figure out what place you and Rub are talking about.

I got BBFS from Kiki at Stone a month or so ago. Unbelievable, but that's a little more risk than I like. $100.00 extra. I had read a review that she was up for it, so "convincing" wasn't a problem.

Kiki would for an upcharge and there used to be a couple at MM that offered it, but has been awhile since have been by there.