NoVA SugarBabies

[Dimples572]

Nice chick, seemed cool and I'm pretty sure she's real. Sent me a pic with my name on it (could've been fake, who knows) but was adamant about sending half up front. Wouldn't budge and neither would I so we ended at a stalemate.

https://members.seeking.com/member/e...f-4ed752af8f85

[JackRyan1]

That is spot on accurate. That's how I operated also.

Warning. Don't cross the emotional boundary, especially if married. It's a deep dark hole.

Welcome to the Sugar Bowl. It is phenomenal. This is what has worked for me over the past 8 years. Others likely have different advice based on what worked for them. Full disclosure, 55, married, great shape, 5'8", balding, impeccable dresser, extrovert, smart and have "Game".

-Make contact on Seeking and get them off that platform and to text. You can say things on text that will get you banned on Seeking.

-Never send money in advance to any SB that you are not in an arrangement with. Never.

-Never pay for a M&G (meet and greet). If they insist for money to meet, politely decline and move on.

-Meet in public and set up the expectation for arrangement dates=sex=payment. Occasionally the first M&G will become the first BCD's meeting, so always be prepared, but don't expect or push for it.

-You have the $$, therefore negotiate from a position of strength. This is my formula and if the SB doesn't fit, the next one will. I do PPM $400-500. I only play in Arlington / Tysons (occasionally Alexandria) and have had SB's drive to me from MoCo, PG, Lorton, Manassas, and Ashburn. My sweet spot is late afternoon and weekends. Connected with a beautiful young Columbian with a banging body, but she worked 9-5 pm and spent weekends with her family. Didn't work for me.

-No matter how hot the SB is, You will be happiest sticking to a formula that works for you.

Good Luck.

[Rudy Wellz]

New to this. Signed up to SA. Just wondering if you guys just plain ask if intimacy is included in the PPM or if you sorta just bring it up during the actual meeting. I assume these women are in this site knowing the drill, but some profiles and some of your reports are throwing me off.

Welcome to the Sugar Bowl. It is phenomenal. This is what has worked for me over the past 8 years. Others likely have different advice based on what worked for them. Full disclosure, 55, married, great shape, 5'8", balding, impeccable dresser, extrovert, smart and have "Game".

-Make contact on Seeking and get them off that platform and to text. You can say things on text that will get you banned on Seeking.

-Never send money in advance to any SB that you are not in an arrangement with. Never.

-Never pay for a M&G (meet and greet). If they insist for money to meet, politely decline and move on.

-Meet in public and set up the expectation for arrangement dates=sex=payment. Occasionally the first M&G will become the first BCD's meeting, so always be prepared, but don't expect or push for it.

-You have the $$, therefore negotiate from a position of strength. This is my formula and if the SB doesn't fit, the next one will. I do PPM $400-500. I only play in Arlington / Tysons (occasionally Alexandria) and have had SB's drive to me from MoCo, PG, Lorton, Manassas, and Ashburn. My sweet spot is late afternoon and weekends. Connected with a beautiful young Columbian with a banging body, but she worked 9-5 pm and spent weekends with her family. Didn't work for me.

-No matter how hot the SB is, You will be happiest sticking to a formula that works for you.

Good Luck.

[Tyrex2]

So I'm just guessing this might be a violation of TOS on seeking. But may also explain why some of this shit lately seems a bit odd in the chats. Apparently somebody is trying to monetize a SD screening service.

[Rudy Wellz]

LOL no. Just one or the other. I try to stay away from the ones seeking an allowance, at least initially upfront I try to sell them on a ppm arrangement and then if things are going well for a month or two we can discuss an allowance.

Allowances create expectations. SD: I'm paying you $X, so I want to see you why times, especially next weekend. SB: SD is paying me $X, I don't feel like seeing him this week, but he's requesting and I don't want to upset him. Whereas PPM means I want to see you and you want to see me, so let's do it. I get the SB's that want an allowance. I would too. PPM are more transactional and some SB's equate that with sex work.

I will not entertain any conversations of an allowance. PPM or next!

[Rudy Wellz]

I've had a handful of experiences where real feelings developed. It can go poorly unless you have a solid head on your shoulders and communicate effectively.

First experience. Relatively early on in my sugaring days, met someone, we connected instantly, and she agreed we would not really have the sugar part. The lack of boundaries scared me a little and I was definitely more into her than I should have been. She moved away so it resolved itself. (Fun fact, her profile pic for a while was her holding a Plan B I bought her. Looking back, we should have had sugar from the get-go and had I been more in touch with my non-monogamous side I probably could have navigated that, because neither of us intended to be exclusive.

Second experience. About a year later, had an incredible ongoing arrangement with a lovely young woman. Sexual chemistry firing on all cylinders plus logistical convenience that led to regular meetings as much as 2-3 times a week. We genuinely connected on multiple levels and I found myself falling for her a bit. It seemed like she was doing the same. She moved in with her folks and that brought it to an end. Looking back, I think had I been able to communicate more directly and effectively, I could have resolved my concerns and kept the dynamic where it belonged. (Fun fact, she is back out on her own again and I still see her from time to time. It's fun but the magic of the original visits is gone.).

Third experience. Last year, hit it off with someone who was definitely falling for me. She wasn't consistently obsessive, and there was a d / s component to the dynamic so it was somewhat wrapped up in that, but it was clear she was over a line I did not want her to cross over. In her defense, the time together was pretty electric, but I most definitely did not not feel the same way. I cut it off, which was drama laden but that helped convince me it was for the best.

Fourth experience. Around the same time, also hit it off with another SB. She's very much my speed on multiple levels, and our chemistry is electric. She was somewhat experienced in poly life and also incredibly clear and communicative. Through our conversations and time together I broke through my own barriers on monogamy and got comfortable with the fact that a part of me really cared for her, and that she cared for me, and that did not undermine or take away from my feelings in my primary relationship. Again, communication has been essential in all of this. We've been together for over a year and it is by far the best arrangement I've had. One of the best relationships I've had. It is healthy and positive and supportive in all ways.

Moral of this story is that you absolutely can enjoy a mature and healthy relationship within a sugar context, but it takes time, chemistry, logistics, and communication.

Great post. Congratulations on Fourth experience and your great sugar relationship.

I have 2 experiences.

Young, smart and sexy SB but not much you can do with an anthropology degree. Trying to find herself and we connected and had a 2 year arrangement. She offered me essentially unlimited access in exchange for paying her half of the rent. The math absolutely worked in my favor. Unfortunately, with increased frequency, the chemistry decreased and the novelty wore off. As a married man, didn't need any additional relationship expectations or obligations. Ended the relationship and she moved out of the country.

Fast forward to my Covid SB. When everything was shut down we spent an incredible amount of time together. She had her own place, gave me a key and we really grew close. She was my #1 SB, but she wanted me to become her boyfriend'ish. After about 18 months, she suggested that we stop the PPM and that I just help her out occasionally with funds. That lasted about 2 months. Then the expectations for my time increased. When I couldn't make a dinner with her best friend from out of town, she absolutely lost it. Then cried when we met to talk about it. That was the last time that I saw her. Had to cut it off.

[GAGuy2020]

Little further south but a few SBs tried to do what I call "dating". This ain't dating if you get payments but can give her the illusion if it make her feel like she's not an escort.

My buddy's top girl started to catch feelings and wanted to not charge, exchange full names, and go out. Had passion with her but never left the hotel. Had to decline because real dating is too much upkeep and had to keep the expectation what that was is physical only with passion of lovers.

Not here to hand out free meals or pay while making sure she is satisfied but willing to paint date or girlfriend illusion for feelings. She's paid to make the man's needs first, not paid for her to acknowledge you or make you jump through dating or waiting hoops.

Money and gifts off the table and we can date as equals but most want the money to flow and have multiple daddies they don't want to give up. Hooked on easy money but girl not charging and just going to SB site to find a good guy are dangerous/broken. Pay, play house, next.

The problem is girls minds are not designed for physical long term long term and some fools are actually using the site to exclusive date or find husbands. They want more and can risk getting upset if they don't get it. Had to cut it off before risk but was fun and hot! Just gotta be gentle to show them this ain't tender if paid.

If you are single go for it but you can't save a 304. Enjoy them, connect, treat them right, but don't fall in love long term. Too many risks and a good quality wife ain't a 2nd hand SB/escort. No hate and be nice, my buddy even had stronger bonds with SBs than girls actually dated but they are still arrangements not relationships. There is a reason these amazing girls are single or aren't already made wives.

[Dimples572]

This one is expecting a ppm of 2 k. A ppm, not an allowance. LOL.

https://members.seeking.com/member/e...5-da9b7c0adf2c

[Member #6951]

That said, have any of you guys ever done the unthinkable? When you get the kind of arrangement where you are texting a few times a week and go out for dinner and drinks and not just F in the FC, slowly develop a friendship or connection, what do you do if you start to catch feelings? Or if you think they are catching feelings for you?

It's really the worst case scenario unless you can manipulate it to your advantage without letting anyone get hurt or have it affect your real life.

I've had a handful of experiences where real feelings developed. It can go poorly unless you have a solid head on your shoulders and communicate effectively.

First experience. Relatively early on in my sugaring days, met someone, we connected instantly, and she agreed we would not really have the sugar part. The lack of boundaries scared me a little and I was definitely more into her than I should have been. She moved away so it resolved itself. (Fun fact, her profile pic for a while was her holding a Plan B I bought her. Looking back, we should have had sugar from the get-go and had I been more in touch with my non-monogamous side I probably could have navigated that, because neither of us intended to be exclusive.

Second experience. About a year later, had an incredible ongoing arrangement with a lovely young woman. Sexual chemistry firing on all cylinders plus logistical convenience that led to regular meetings as much as 2-3 times a week. We genuinely connected on multiple levels and I found myself falling for her a bit. It seemed like she was doing the same. She moved in with her folks and that brought it to an end. Looking back, I think had I been able to communicate more directly and effectively, I could have resolved my concerns and kept the dynamic where it belonged. (Fun fact, she is back out on her own again and I still see her from time to time. It's fun but the magic of the original visits is gone.).

Third experience. Last year, hit it off with someone who was definitely falling for me. She wasn't consistently obsessive, and there was a d / s component to the dynamic so it was somewhat wrapped up in that, but it was clear she was over a line I did not want her to cross over. In her defense, the time together was pretty electric, but I most definitely did not not feel the same way. I cut it off, which was drama laden but that helped convince me it was for the best.

Fourth experience. Around the same time, also hit it off with another SB. She's very much my speed on multiple levels, and our chemistry is electric. She was somewhat experienced in poly life and also incredibly clear and communicative. Through our conversations and time together I broke through my own barriers on monogamy and got comfortable with the fact that a part of me really cared for her, and that she cared for me, and that did not undermine or take away from my feelings in my primary relationship. Again, communication has been essential in all of this. We've been together for over a year and it is by far the best arrangement I've had. One of the best relationships I've had. It is healthy and positive and supportive in all ways.

Moral of this story is that you absolutely can enjoy a mature and healthy relationship within a sugar context, but it takes time, chemistry, logistics, and communication.

[BDM1227]

I been seeing one of my SB for over a year. She been hinting about getting into a real relationship. I just keep telling her that if we are in a real relationship she would lose her allowance. That quiet her down a little. I recently got her pregnant, and thank the heavens she took care of that problem. She been clingy, and been pushing for more. She keeps saying that I'm the longest relationship she had. She even ask about me wifeing her up in the future. I just ignore her, and tell her I'm too old for her. She 21 years old and I'm 43 years old.

I'm in my 50's been seeing a 30 something MILF. All nomal boudaries dropped from the moment we met. That she told me last week that our anniversary is coming up, I suppose its a relationsip.

Pros: doesn't matter what I give her as long as I give her something. The sex is absolutely off the charts. Zero limits and insatiable. She's in DC me NY. The geography and us both having lives keeps it from being too frequent and this doesn't bother her. Always BB.

Cons: clingy. Tells me she misses me constantly. How she has not dropped the L word IDK. MILF Bod. Its good, but not a 20 something hard body.

[Tyrex2]

https://members.seeking.com/member/a...2-9051e8177fe9 BBB Again

https://members.seeking.com/member/9...6-5bdd2d3afc60 elizxoxo

https://members.seeking.com/member/1...b-4ee93e5f0196 Dahlia Rose

https://members.seeking.com/member/3...b-a5cbb2758e16 Bbyv

https://members.seeking.com/member/3...5-1865b7d2235a LittleRose

https://members.seeking.com/member/9...6-05184036f473 Lanafitz93

https://members.seeking.com/member/a...d-29ef488c817e FlirtyCutie

https://members.seeking.com/member/c...b-f4a83a1e1ae0 ErikaEnvy

https://members.seeking.com/messages...9-43f72b01580f PersephoneSiren

Appreciate any heads up either via response or PM.

[SuckeredByaSB]

I don't think someone paying a girl $1 K PPM kills the market. It just means that girl is out of reach for some.

Kinda like some people buy $9 digital watches at Walmart, and some spend many (many, many) thousands on a Rolex or Breitling or whatever.

No, that's not the point. I've happily paid $5 k for Omegas and Breitlings. But I'm not paying $1 k for the Casio skank.

The market is the market.

[Dimples572]

Thanks. I didn't know that they monitor those messages. I will be careful.

Do some guys give an allowance and then also PPM? I think that is excessive. I've been reading in this forum that perhaps the dinner, entertainment, hotel, and PPM is enough to get some intimacy during a meeting, so no allowance needed. Or perhaps just an allowance but no PPM, maybe the allowance gets your more meets? Seems like the younger crowd is more open to this than the entitled later 20's or 30's.

LOL no. Just one or the other. I try to stay away from the ones seeking an allowance, at least initially upfront I try to sell them on a ppm arrangement and then if things are going well for a month or two we can discuss an allowance.

[AnonDemon69]

I know of more than one person who got banned from SA because they were a little too direct in their language about exchanging sex for money when messaging on SA. At some point I usually just move the conversation to text or have a platonic meet & greet (usually lunch) and discuss specifics about the ppm subject there.

Thanks. I didn't know that they monitor those messages. I will be careful.

Do some guys give an allowance and then also PPM? I think that is excessive. I've been reading in this forum that perhaps the dinner, entertainment, hotel, and PPM is enough to get some intimacy during a meeting, so no allowance needed. Or perhaps just an allowance but no PPM, maybe the allowance gets your more meets? Seems like the younger crowd is more open to this than the entitled later 20's or 30's.

[LikesGirls]

Jesus, why would you pay that skank $1 k??

Killing me and killing the market.

I don't think someone paying a girl $1 K PPM kills the market. It just means that girl is out of reach for some.

Kinda like some people buy $9 digital watches at Walmart, and some spend many (many, many) thousands on a Rolex or Breitling or whatever.