Massage Parlor Reports

[GoHomeSmiling]

Guys, it was like she was trying to unclog a toilet. The only reason it's still attached is because she used a half pint of oil.

[RickSomething]

The hobby is becoming enjoyable again. It's slow everywhere now. The stimi money is gone, PPP money for your fake import export business has run out, and your boss has popped the bubble on your WFM dream. Suddenly there's no line around the block for rushed services from 5's and 6's. Little by little we are returning to equilibrium. J Powell is crushing hobby inflation with 75 point interest rate hikes.

As a result, I ventured out to Orange Spa where many of you have had an unexpected Adam's apple surprise in recent visits. Personally, I subscribe to the philosophy that there are no chicks with dicks, only men with tits, so I abstained from such adventures. However, after hearing that April was back in town, I decided to check out this recent expansion of the BHC franchise.

I saw April over the summer at BHC and thought that she reminded me of a Chinese Riley Reid. She fucks like one. She definitely has a mouth like one. Her English is really good and the girl likes to talk shit....

...On the way out, another girl chats me up and offers some Chinese candy on the counter which is likely from 1993. I take one to be polite and head back out onto Archer.

Thoroughly enjoyable review! Thanks APP!

[Jinurso]

I'm looking for a parlor out there where there are some lookers at the shop. I'm not looking for a location at an apartment or hotel (fear of getting robbed). I live in the downtown area are there any out there that you can get a lineup like rush hour 2 and decide who you want to go with?

Is that real? I don't think I've ever seen that outside of a movie. In every place I've ever been I've either booked with a girl ahead of time or you get who you get when you come in. But if someone has seen this in real life in Chicago I'd love to know.

And also, have you ever gotten around to actually seeing anybody? Your post history is hilarious. It's always "I want to go / see her, but I'm afraid that I'll be robbed / busted / killed / disappointed".

Just give it a go, dude. Go to one of the reputable agencies, book a girl who has good reviews here, and have some fun. You'll be fine.

[Moss734]

I'm looking for a parlor out there where there are some lookers at the shop. I'm not looking for a location at an apartment or hotel (fear of getting robbed). I live in the downtown area are there any out there that you can get a lineup like rush hour 2 and decide who you want to go with?

I've seen fishbowl like in rush hour 2 when I used to frequent Shanghai and Thailand. Nothing like that here in the states that I have encountered. If somebody has seen please let us know where to go.

[Lukkylou]

But also. Dude. You literally just messaged me a day ago asking about her and then said the price was too much and you weren't going to go. So I doubt you "went in and walked out. " LOL.

I still had a crave and wanted to see for myself. Harmony stocks no 10's homie. Mink at MT was a hot little thing and she was a 7 at most. She was younger, tighter and better looking than this Cash goddess you exaggerated about. Joy at exercise is also a better piece of Korean meat. You want some other hot little Asian dolls? BHC stocks a decent amount of younger Chinese cuties. April, Amber, Kiki are just a few off the top of my head. Yes they do stock some 5's and 6's usually, but they also have some pretty hot ones. Nothing I'd rate over 7. 5. You see, I base my scale on reality and honesty. And actual experience with 8's and 9's. Guys like you do the rest of the board a disservice with these overblown imaginary ratings. There's no way a late 40's to early 50's spa korean girl should be getting a perfect 10 rating. Especially this grandma cash.

[Eddinger]

Agree that cash is not worth the cash. 260 for that? Saw her in person and walked out. ***** is closer to 50 and no where near a 10, more like a 5. Come on fellas, do better.

But also. Dude. You literally just messaged me a day ago asking about her and then said the price was too much and you weren't going to go. So I doubt you "went in and walked out. " LOL.

[Eddinger]

It's so convoluted these days, need to look at the history of the reviewer, especially if it's the only review.

Its true! But I've got a pretty good history. Its ok that others had a different take though! People find diff girls hot. Everyone seems to be messaging me like dopes though. But. You don't need to go see her! I had a good time though and her body is a 10.

[Lukkylou]

Wow, I know different people have different tastes, but this sounds like a description of two entirely different women.

Agree that cash is not worth the cash. 260 for that? Saw her in person and walked out. ***** is closer to 50 and no where near a 10, more like a 5. Come on fellas, do better.

[Jinurso]

There's a woman named Cash (LOL) at harmony in Norridge. Honestly gorgeous. 10/10 and one of the top 10 bodies I've ever fucked in my 25 years. Unreal body. Perfect tits (fake) ass like no one would believe, legs, everything. Just fucking smoking hot. Worth the drive to Norridge. 80+180.

Had a session with "cash". In my opinion she was hyped up. Nice lady, probably around mid 40's. Table shower was OK, massage was lackluster. Looks she is a 7 overall. Face was a 7, body was a 7. 5, definitely no ass. I would not repeat. Location was good. Staff was friendly.

Wow, I know different people have different tastes, but this sounds like a description of two entirely different women.

[Jinurso]

I'm looking for a parlor out there where there are some lookers at the shop. I'm not looking for a location at an apartment or hotel (fear of getting robbed). I live in the downtown area are there any out there that you can get a lineup like rush hour 2 and decide who you want to go with?

Is that real? I don't think I've ever seen that outside of a movie. In every place I've ever been I've either booked with a girl ahead of time or you get who you get when you come in. But if someone has seen this in real life in Chicago I'd love to know.

[Desparado]

Had a session with "cash". In my opinion she was hyped up. Nice lady, probably around mid 40's. Table shower was OK, massage was lackluster. Looks she is a 7 overall. Face was a 7, body was a 7. 5, definitely no ass. I would not repeat. Location was good. Staff was friendly.

It's so convoluted these days, need to look at the history of the reviewer, especially if it's the only review.

[TrickyBic53]

I'm looking for a parlor out there where there are some lookers at the shop. I'm not looking for a location at an apartment or hotel (fear of getting robbed). I live in the downtown area are there any out there that you can get a lineup like rush hour 2 and decide who you want to go with?

[CivicSi213]

Had a session with "cash". In my opinion she was hyped up. Nice lady, probably around mid 40's. Table shower was OK, massage was lackluster. Looks she is a 7 overall. Face was a 7, body was a 7. 5, definitely no ass. I would not repeat. Location was good. Staff was friendly.

[Pupsnu]

Is she the only one there? What's her name?

There's a woman named Cash (LOL) at harmony in Norridge. Honestly gorgeous. 10/10 and one of the top 10 bodies I've ever fucked in my 25 years. Unreal body. Perfect tits (fake) ass like no one would believe, legs, everything. Just fucking smoking hot. Worth the drive to Norridge. 80+180.

[PatientX1]

Hi fellas! Any recommendations other than Pomares in Chicago? TIA.

Check my reports. Rina in Rogers park. Meghan and Alexandra right on the Chicago Lincolnwood border.

All massage and HE, well reviewed and nice ladies. Independents, in apartments, not spas. Hope that helps!