Massage Parlor Reports

**Datsurman** · 09-25-20 11:58

Imagine you're having cereal for breakfast. Your dog climbs up onto the table, squares up, takes a huge dump directly into your cereal bowl, then looks back at your to see if you're going to do something about it. You shrug, pat her head, "such a good girl. Yes. You are! And toss her a doggy treat. When you tip an erotic MT that doesn't give you an HE, that's what is happening. No HE, no tip. Period.

Originally Posted by AngelBravo [View Original Post]

I visited her today, as other mentions totally legit. 25 year old Latina. About 5,1 not thin but normal body however she does have some huge breasts. Solid D's and a nice but. Cute face. Only issue is you spend most of your time looking down into the massage table so that's pretty pointless. There is also no extras whatsoever. Totally professional. She knows people see her because she's cute and hot and offers a decent massage. I won't be repeating though, too much cock tease and the massage was. 8 with tip around 1. So. Not worth it for just a massage. At those prices I rather go to a legit massage. I was hoping there be atleast teasing or fuck even self service but nope. Nada.

**Jadedone** · 09-25-20 08:54

Originally Posted by Datsurman [View Original Post]

Almost all women fake their orgasms. They watch one porno in HS and their dumb asses are like "okay, that's what I'm supposed to do".

Yep. That's why I laugh when I read posts here about guys giving providers multiple orgasms.

Yeah, right buddy. LOL.

**Jamz12** · 09-25-20 08:31

Originally Posted by VikingFan13 [View Original Post]

Even in Covid times. https://patch.com/illinois/joliet/pr...-road-business.

This line made me chuckle:

Wang "knowingly performed an act of touching or fondling the sex organs of one person by another person, for anything of value, to wit.

**HanginBalls** · 09-25-20 02:05

Originally Posted by OnlyDreams [View Original Post]

You are wasting your time here, you should be writing scripts for porn movies since you have a lot of imagination buddy!!

Imagination is the mother of orgasm!!

**Yeezuss** · 09-25-20 01:56

Anyone ever had a bad screening that didn't go right for CLM but was able to try to book again later on? When they asked for name I gave them the name I go by not the name on my I'd and when I sent them my I'd they said why am I sending them a fake one and said they can't verify me And that they can't help me. It was literally my first time ever trying to book with them so I didn't know it was that strict. I was just trying to find a FS Latina parlor.

**OnlyDreams** · 09-25-20 00:22

Originally Posted by HanginBalls [View Original Post]

You're basically spot on! On the flip she (d) raped me! Was curious what was underneath the towel as I pitched a tent that nearly put a hole through the ceiling!! Whisked the towel and freaked!! Threw the towel away and said," Fuck it" Jerked me off till I shot one to the wall!! Grant tip and watched her wipe down the wall as I walked out!!

You are wasting your time here, you should be writing scripts for porn movies since you have a lot of imagination buddy!!

**Jay117** · 09-24-20 16:37

Originally Posted by Jay117 [View Original Post]

Any current report on Mercy (N Michigan)? Forum search gave mixed results in whether it's just legit, and they have legit-sounding yelp reviews, yet they advertise like an AMP. Thanks.

Okay, I TOFTT. This is the office at 180 and Michigan. It actually said "Jin Massage Spa" on the listing in the building, but it shows up as part of the Mercy block by its phone number. Office is in a very discreet location. Anyway. Saw Yaya, who's the Dolly Parton of AMP girls. Apparently the "soft" keyword isn't a thing in Chicago, because she did about 10-15 minutes on my arms and neck, but eventually it got more interesting. Ended up paying 45/80 for Russian, but otherwise was an L1 experience. A little jack-hammery, but fine.

And then she had 2 orgasms.

**VikingFan13** · 09-24-20 14:38

Even in Covid times. https://patch.com/illinois/joliet/pr...-road-business.

**ApplePiePussy** · 09-24-20 14:25

Originally Posted by Jayp80 [View Original Post]

The next thing you'll tell me is the 21 hot chick working at Hooters who gets hit on 100 times a day isn't interested in me. This is what I expect the life of a female sex worker is like. Completely detached and desensitized.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QFbI5BO5es

Look, some girls are new and some girls just make a connection with certain guys. They are not robots and many are not detached and desensitized yet. Some girls do this for a few months and bail. That's not enough time to get desensitized.

That said, the monger community has a problem with reviews. Instead of telling the truth so that others may benefit, even if it was a bad time, they enhance the experience in an attempt to impress strangers on the internet who, 9 times out of 10, know they are full of shit. Sorry that I'm a little reluctant to believe that the Penguin gave Catwoman several orgasms in a row.

You know how the saying goes. The biggest liars in the world are the Chinese. Following closely behind them is our beloved community.

**Datsurman** · 09-24-20 13:53

Almost all women fake their orgasms. They watch one porno in HS and their dumb asses are like "okay, that's what I'm supposed to do". It annoys the fck out of me. I was screwing a chick last week who was acting like she was trying to win an Oscar, I finally had to slap her a couple times and tell her to shut up.

Originally Posted by ApplePiePussy [View Original Post]

It's really impressive how these escorts who fuck 20 times in a day are able to orgasm 3 times per client. That's 60 orgasms a day.

**HanginBalls** · 09-24-20 12:27

Originally Posted by Jayp80 [View Original Post]

The next thing you'll tell me is the 21 hot chick working at Hooters who gets hit on 100 times a day isn't interested in me. This is what I expect the life of a female sex worker is like. Completely detached and desensitized.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QFbI5BO5es

Hooters girls have feelings / needs too!

**Jayp80** · 09-24-20 12:10

Originally Posted by ApplePiePussy [View Original Post]

It's really impressive how these escorts who fuck 20 times in a day are able to orgasm 3 times per client. That's 60 orgasms a day.

The next thing you'll tell me is the 21 hot chick working at Hooters who gets hit on 100 times a day isn't interested in me. This is what I expect the life of a female sex worker is like. Completely detached and desensitized.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_QFbI5BO5es

**Starks** · 09-24-20 06:50

Originally Posted by StanCopier [View Original Post]

Have an appt at an AMP tomorrow and will report.

But for now, are there any MP's w / extras going on in Oak Park? Used to see Cici on North Ave. Until that ended. Anything reliable going on?

Thanks!

You can try thanks. Nothing to write home about, but it'll get the job done. Kind of like Dominoes Pizza at 11 p when you are drunk and hungry.

**ADAvet101** · 09-23-20 11:03

Finally got the chance to see Allison. Picks on the site are pretty accurate. She has a bit of baby damage now, but not very much. The rest of her is spot on. She's a bit on the shorter side, but definitely curvy rather than petite. Her tits are a perfect natural 10, best I've seen since my days in Germany over a decade ago. She also gave a better than average massage as well. I had opted for the jacuzzi session and after some break the ice chit-chat she got behind me for an actual back and neck massage that actually worked out a kink or two. Once we got to the bed she gave a great happy ending. I had reported before that she offered FS, sadly that is no longer the case. She is in a relationship and apparently the BF knows she works there and what she does and she no longer goes beyond topless L1. Still, with what she does offer she was the most attractive and attentive girl I've seen personally at CLM. Now have to hope she breaks up with that guy and goes back to the full menu.

**Jay117** · 09-23-20 07:29

Any current report on Mercy (N Michigan)? Forum search gave mixed results in whether it's just legit, and they have legit-sounding yelp reviews, yet they advertise like an AMP. Thanks.