"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

**TomDickNHarry** · 03-12-19 11:22

Originally Posted by DrSummer [View Original Post]

You veterans, any suggestions what my next move should be? Am I going too fast or slow?

Stay safe guys, and I will update.

Dr. S.

Pulling for you. Fwiw, I think you're handling it about the right pace. I especially like the way you didn't get her cash for only dinner, it sets the right expectation in her mind. I think whether or not she moves to oral will give you a pretty good indication about the ultimate destination. If she does that, I think you have a good chance, but if she won't go past HJ's in the next date or two, actual FC is never going to happen, barring some change in her situation, I. E. Desperation, etc.

But if you can get her to the BJ, while it's another big step to go all the way I like your chances b / c she's progressing and BJ is a lot closer to a full FC than using a hand. Now, if she does it, I'd definitely give more sugar and set that expectation further in her mind, the more she does and more she makes you happy, the better she does. So she sees the upside in things progressing, beyond just keeping you around. Not sure your normal amount, I'm finding 250 the going rate these days personally so if she does the BJ I'd maybe take her to 150. Do the oral a couple of times then start pushing for more again.

If she balks at the oral, you could try to mention upfront that you "can be a bit more generous" instead of just dropping the bonus on her, and see if that helps get her over the line. I hate talking specific price with these types but that will get the message across. If even that doesn't work to even get to oral, then you're basically stuck with 100 HJ's and have to decide if you want to keep seeing her, which I'm guessing is no. In that case I'd make sure to tell her nicely that it's not worth it to you and as much as you like her you're going to focus your energy on a traditional arrangement, you can still be friends and she should let you know if anything changes. That's your hail mary, perhaps the threat of not seeing a guy she is comfortable and safe with and has been helping out moves her. And also if she ever gets desperate, you want to be the first call.

I've converted 4 platonic only's on there. One after a couple of M&Gs turned out to have no issue going to the FC, just wanted to "weed out the creeps" with the profile. Another thought that platonic only grew on trees but once that notion was disabused by a few she met, had little issue with it. She was more focused on the ends of making money as a sugar baby and so only took the effort of explaining reality to her (reinforced by another couple guys) and we were off to the races.

The other 2 took serious work, probably 5 M&Gs before I even got more than a hug. I even broke one of my cardinal rules with them in that I provided some sugar w / o anything happening, small amounts to one each date, only after our little lunches and coffee dates didn't come with a gift card a couple of times she started talking about moving forward. The other one on like the 4th meet she was good to go and we set a tentative expectation to FC a couple of days later, and I actually gave her the FC amount knowing that she had a big expense due. She cancelled the FC and went quiet for a bit before agreeing to grab drinks one day, at which there was nothing provided by me. Next week I get a text "Want to come over for dinner tomorrow? " And it was on. So in these harder to crack ones, I found the sugar had a lot to do with enticing them.

Now the one commonality in all these girls was that they were either sexually adventurous and / or experienced, their inexperience was just doing it in this way and with an older guy etc. In fact a couple of them were kinky and bi. Could be reading it wrong but your girl sounds a little less adventurous (don't want to get it on my hand). But you got her to do something which is not a minor step, so since you clearly like the chase as I do, keep at it and let us know how it goes.

**DogBert77** · 03-10-19 23:18

Originally Posted by DoggieFan [View Original Post]

To make things even scarier he showed her a gun he carries. He's convicted of at least beating his ex wife several times. He told her he's not supposed to carry which makes me think he's a felon.

She was thinking about a restraining order but is in a fix because she has a very public job & can't afford to fuck up her rep.

My main worry isn't that he'd out her, which would suck, but that he's infatuated enough to actually hurt her or worse.

I'm sure the police would be interested in a felon carrying a pistol and staulking her, although she would be outed I'm sure.

DISCLAIMER: THE BELOW IS NOT LEGAL ADVICE, AND I AM NOT A LAWYER.

I think she can go to the police without outing herself very much. She can just report him. In giving the details of how she bumped into him, she doesn't have to give her whole life story. Something like this: "Was hard up financially, went on SA looking for a wealthy boyfriend. Met Mr. Felon from site, realized she knew him, wasn't interested in pursuing a relationship. Now Mr. Felon is stalking her and threatening her and displaying a weapon which he told her he was not allowed to carry. " Period, full stop, end of story. She doesn't have to say she is fucking guys for cash. If they ask questions, she doesn't have to answer them. They aren't going to know what she is doing this unless she tells them. They haul Mr. Felon in, he doesn't KNOW she is fucking guys for money, all he knows is he wanted to fuck her for money and she refused. She just needs to recount the relevant parts of the story, and shut her mouth. SA is officially a "dating site," and if other users use it to arrange meets for prostitution, that's not her fault.

**FarFarAway** · 03-10-19 14:57

Originally Posted by DoggieFan [View Original Post]

My SB in another city in North Carolina has a major problem.

She was thinking about a restraining order but is in a fix because she has a very public job & can't afford to fuck up her rep.

My main worry isn't that he'd out her, which would suck, but that he's infatuated enough to actually hurt her or worse.

I'm sure the police would be interested in a felon carrying a pistol and staulking her, although she would be outed I'm sure.

Anyone have any experience with this happening to their SB, escort or even just someone you know? The fact she has a few regulars as an escort & me as a SD makes it sticky to go to Uncle LEO!

Feel free to PM me. Anything you share will be kept strictly confidential.

What he's doing to her is more like a sex crime, on the internet, most states (IDK about that jurisdiction) have laws against it, and victims of sex crimes are entitled to anonymity. Of course, if the LE decides to go after him on other charges, that's a separate matter, she wouldn't necessarily have to be involved.

**DoggieFan** · 03-10-19 12:24

My SB in another city in North Carolina has a major problem.

I was lucky to find her literally minutes after she posted her first STG ad a couple of months ago. I think I was the first or second guy she saw. Basically a civilian that lost her job and totaled her car the same week, missed her insurance payment. A friend that escorts took pics and set up her ad.

I explained to her I had an awesome SB for two & a half years that ended last July. I explained how it had worked and she really thought that fit her situation better than a straight escort / hobbiest scenario. We have seen each other about eight times now, including four overnights.

She since has gotten another job & taken her ad down. She still sees me and two or three guys I helped her screen, sees them doing hourly visits.

The problem is she had got a text from a guy that she didn't realize knew her, as well as her friends & even her Dad.

When she pulled up to the hotel, he knocked on her window & it was awkward to say the least. He sat in her car (actually her friends she had borrowed) & agreed to keep each other's secret. He offered to help her financially, no strings attached (ya right), she refused.

So the next week she gets a text from a "different" guy and she insists on a pic before meeting. No problem, perfect stranger. She gets to the room & it's him again, used a fake pic! She goes in, he tells her he wants sex, she gets pissed & leaves.

Well now he's trying to blackmail her into fucking him. Says if she doesn't he'll out her, even to her Dad! What a POS.

To make things even scarier he showed her a gun he carries. He's convicted of at least beating his ex wife several times. He told her he's not supposed to carry which makes me think he's a felon.

She was thinking about a restraining order but is in a fix because she has a very public job & can't afford to fuck up her rep.

My main worry isn't that he'd out her, which would suck, but that he's infatuated enough to actually hurt her or worse.

I'm sure the police would be interested in a felon carrying a pistol and staulking her, although she would be outed I'm sure.

Anyone have any experience with this happening to their SB, escort or even just someone you know? The fact she has a few regulars as an escort & me as a SD makes it sticky to go to Uncle LEO!

Feel free to PM me. Anything you share will be kept strictly confidential.

**BuffBill75** · 03-10-19 09:31

Originally Posted by DrSummer [View Original Post]

We all know that (at least the members here), and has been discussed here numerous times. The chances of success for girls looking for on-line, or "platonic" are slim and either they drop out of the scene or learn how to spread their legs little bit more to stay in business. I have about a year of experience with SA, and met at least 50 potential SB's in person. For the first time, I met a girl two days ago who confessed to that fact. She is a 20 year old college junior (exchange student). We got comfortable with each other very quickly. She told me she tried "online" first with no success at all. Then changed her profile to 'platonic', still very little interested parties. Only when she offered "intimacy", there were serious interest from SDs.

Fast forward, this girl is model quality (at least 9. 5 out of 10 in my scale), slim girl with curves at the right places, cute face and flawless body. Spent 2 hours at FC yesterday, the best erotic experience in my life. Not just the sex, the whole experience was far beyond what I expected. There are few gems out there if you are patient enough to find them.

Stay Safe.

Dr. S.

Damage for that experience?

**FarFarAway** · 03-09-19 11:41

I go long periods w / o a paid membership on SA, but have still been lucky in connecting w / some POTs in the following way. I have both public and private photos that present well but aren't me, though close. I can not only favorite a girls' profile, but give her the private pic, which puts a message in her in box. Sometimes there is no response, sometimes there is a simple "Hi", but I have often gotten their #. That doesn't necessarily mean they are UTRs. I read the message using the trick that has been taught in this thread fairly recently.

**Nps787** · 03-09-19 10:08

Thanks for the tips.

1. Did not know about the international site.

2. I am on SA and already have made few online friends.

Happy seeking.

**FarFarAway** · 03-08-19 18:04

Originally Posted by Spiderrva [View Original Post]

I've uncovered a huge scam. If a girl "favorites" you without viewing you, it's probably a new scam from the UK. Sometimes when they're hiding their information, they make a mistake and their recent login location pops up as the UK. 50% of them have a telephone number in their profile. A lot of them say Native American under ethnicity, even when it's a young hot blonde from Nebraska. 80% of them are listed under a double City or double State. (Ex Nevada, Nevada or Ohio, Ohio) Broken English of course. The trick is to try to get them to talk on the phone. They will only text. I turned them In and reported them to the site, but it only got ME kicked off.

IDK why more people don't do what I do. Hide my profile from search. There are no disadvantages. The only girls who can see it are those whose profiles I have visited. This cuts out all of the scam contacts, based most likely on your income statements. This works for me also b / c I have a SO and I want to keep a low profile.

**FarFarAway** · 03-08-19 13:50

This is on every profile, and I wonder if any of you have pre-conceptions about the type of SB you get from that. I am specifically interested in a POT who says Middle Eastern. Some of those cultures (e. G. Saudi) very much place women on a lower plane, perhaps if that is manifest in a SB, she would want a dominant man. I once had a Syrian-American GF (IRL), in the Carolinas 20+ years ago. She didn't seem too submissive, but heck, maybe I didn't know what to do for her interests. We didn't stay together. Any other correlations? It also strikes me that correlations might be unique to local populations of POTs. So if you have ideas, could you identify your geography?

BTW, I recently learned that ABG stands for Asian Babygirl, a tip-off to a submissive one.

**DogBert77** · 03-08-19 12:58

Originally Posted by Nps787 [View Original Post]

Long time lurker, first repoet.

Have had success locally and while expensive hobby, I find it's worth it.

I am travelling to Europe soon. Spain and trying to find some company there.

I would appreciate any tips from this group.

Will report back my experience when I get back.

No recent experience in Spain, but two tips:

1. Do you know about the international version of this site, Internationalsexguide.info ? It has steered me right in lots of places on my travels.

2. Just check out SA and dive in. I just did a search for 18-23's within 50 miles of Barcelona with medium tight filters and popped up 1323 lovelies including this one: https://www.seeking.com/member/6d37b...a-5310c267f8e0.

Got to be something you can hit out of that group! Bueno suerte!

**Spiderrva** · 03-08-19 09:51

I've uncovered a huge scam. If a girl "favorites" you without viewing you, it's probably a new scam from the UK. Sometimes when they're hiding their information, they make a mistake and their recent login location pops up as the UK. 50% of them have a telephone number in their profile. A lot of them say Native American under ethnicity, even when it's a young hot blonde from Nebraska. 80% of them are listed under a double City or double State. (Ex Nevada, Nevada or Ohio, Ohio) Broken English of course. The trick is to try to get them to talk on the phone. They will only text. I turned them In and reported them to the site, but it only got ME kicked off.

**Nps787** · 03-08-19 08:50

Long time lurker, first repoet.

Have had success locally and while expensive hobby, I find it's worth it.

I am travelling to Europe soon. Spain and trying to find some company there.

I would appreciate any tips from this group.

Will report back my experience when I get back.

**DogBert77** · 03-07-19 13:01

Originally Posted by ErnestLl [View Original Post]

Once upon a time, SA would distinguish between someone not being active and someone blockign you. Wish they would go back to that so we don't waste our valuable stalking time.

I think they still do. In my messages, There are two categories of people I can't see anymore. On all of them the picture is gone and if I click on icon I get the generic page that says "user may have blocked you, deactivated" etc. But in my inbox, some of them still have the SB's user name displayed and some have substituted the generic "Sugar Baby. " I have been assuming the ones with the user name still showing have blocked me, and the ones showing "Sugar Baby" are gone from the site.

I'm not sure which category is which because I can't remember the login from my phantom account and I haven't gotten around to creating a new on yet! Where I live, there are so many new girls hitting the site all the time that I don't have time to obsess over whether they blocked me or are off the site. I just move on.

**Ernest Ll** · 03-07-19 09:43

Originally Posted by YeongIl [View Original Post]

https://www.seeking.com/member/88659...e-429fd0a4d191

Caution: while she says that she's DTF, she also said that she's a HS senior and that she turned 18 yesterday. But she joined the site in February. I would avoid!

I would avoid because she seems to think DTF is Down to Feed.

**Ernest Ll** · 03-07-19 09:42

Originally Posted by FarFarAway [View Original Post]

I have a past SB I haven't seen in a couple of years, so I don't have contact info. I do have all her identity IRL, but I think I'd flip her out if I contacted her that way. I saw her show up on SA recently, I am fairly sure. She has very discreet pix. Anyway, she is smart, absolutely stunning, very hot, and great in the sack. I'd love to hook up w. Her again. I don't have a current SA membership, but I have some private pics on the site (not me either, like my public photo, but close). I gave her access to the pics, she read my profile, and replied briefly. I don't think she recognized it as me. I finally get off the dine and get a prepaid card to get my membership so I can contact her. And now I can't find her on the site. I have two unpaid profiles, from which I viewed and favorited her profile, and now I can't see either of them. The message from giving her access to my photos I also can't see. Sadly, I cannot recall the profile name she used, so I can't ask one of you brothers to check if she just blocked me. Any solutions envisioned? Is this the way the site is supposed to work? FFA.

Location age range and other demo info, and anything you remember about her pics or profile.

One of us can do a search, see if anything comes up so you will know if she deactivated you or figured it was you and blocked you.

Once upon a time, SA would distinguish between someone not being active and someone blockign you. Wish they would go back to that so we don't waste our valuable stalking time.