"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[Cephlapod Love]

I just tested this viewing a profile of a non premium account and having that account view my premium membership.

The non-premium account does not get any notification of any views by a premium member with Privacy enabled.

The premium account does get a notification of any views- with full disclosure if the viewer is a non-premium or premium without security enabled. And just industry / location info if the viewer is premium with security enabled.

Given the monthly cost of a premium membership, it is unlikely a 20 something SB is a premium member.

Well if it works for you and fits you risk profile then great! It crosses lines I do not wish to cross between my hobby life and real life and is outside of personal risk parameters. To each his own.

[JustLonely]

Adding to the good advice from CL below about a newbie's first M&G, here's my take on having been in the bowl now for three years. I like to get a potential SB straight to the M&G as soon as possible. Sometimes the same day I contact her if I am lucky. She is getting a lot of messages especially if she is new on the site and she will only have the time to meet but so many guys unless you are dealing with an escort or UTR. So the sooner you meet her the better your odds.

I always take a potential SB to a place I have dined at before. I usually know where the quieter tables are located and ask the hostess to seat us there. I already know what I am going to order so I won't be trying to decide what I want while she maybe chatting away. After the initial pleasantries of meeting, I offer my suggestions from the menu. Gives you both the time the get a conversation started and a chance for the initial butterflies to settle down. I am usually thinking of how good she looks in person and casually noting to myself how she is dressed and if she has makeup on or not while she is looking over the menu. A big plus if she has chosen a top or dress that shows a lot of cleavage. Tells me that she has dressed to impress and knows that the "game" is on. I will compliment her if she is wearing a necklace as so few young women these days bother with that accessory. Otherwise, I leave off complimenting her on her looks on a first meeting.

Since you asked about specifics during the m&g here's my next move. After we have ordered the meal I ask a question about something I saw on her profile like dancing, hiking or whatever. She will get comfortable really quick as she talks about a favorite subject of hers. Hopefully I can share my experiences with whatever she is talking about. If not I move onto to telling her about something I like to do that may be appeal to her as well. From there it's just like a regular date. Seeing what her personality is like and she seeing yours. I never bring up SA or my past SBs unless she does it first. If she is not a newbie to this, she most likely will ask about it. Probably ask how come your last arrangement ended or what type of arrangement did you have before or how do you do an arrangement. Since you are new, you can just be honest and say its new to me and you are looking for something that is mutually benefiting. Her response will determine the direction the conversation takes from there. Usually by now its getting close to the end of meal and you both pretty much know if you want to see each other again.

Some general points: Women that look away a lot while talking are generally harder to get to the FC. If you two have maintained good eye contact and shared some good laughs over dinner, you might even have a shot to continue your date in private that night. Otherwise I don't press that issue and I usually get a text from her before I get home saying how much she liked her evening and looking forward to seeing me again. Overall, women that hug me upon greeting and leaving almost always end up in the FC on the next or third date.

As mentioned in the earlier post, be confident and keep the conversation going. Don't get too personal but show her you care about her as a person even though you may be thinking about that cleavage just out of reach across the table!

[Ernest Ll]

I just tested this viewing a profile of a non premium account and having that account view my premium membership.

The non-premium account does not get any notification of any views by a premium member with Privacy enabled.

The premium account does get a notification of any views- with full disclosure if the viewer is a non-premium or premium without security enabled. And just industry / location info if the viewer is premium with security enabled.

Given the monthly cost of a premium membership, it is unlikely a 20 something SB is a premium member.

[Cephlapod Love]

I don't post often, and have not dipped my foot in the bowl. Not sure I even want to, but somehow love living vicariously here. Guessing I'm not alone in that regard.

Anyway, I've read a LOT of postings on this board that briefly refer to or describe a meet & greet, but never in any significant detail. I'd love to learn how you all approach these.

Obviously you meet at an agreed-upon public place, but once you recognize one another, this is where I get curious:

- Is it ever immediately awkward when you see her, she sees you, and your age difference is so stark that you feel guilty for even being there? (I know this sounds judgmental, it isn't intended that way. I think one thing holding me back is fear of how to behave in these types of situations / combinations that I have absolutely no experience with).

- Once you get over any initial awkward feelings, do you approach the conversation from a "tell me about yourself" standpoint?

- Is it more "what do we both want out of this / what got you to want to do this?" kind of discussion?

- Do you approach it as more of a first date or more of an interview? I realize there are problems with the analogy because a first date is often a vetting process, even if we don't call it that.).

Examples of M&G that have gone really poorly and really well?

Inching closer.

Cab.

Welcome! Nice to see someone new actually thinking things through before jumping in. As testimonies here indicate there are pit falls out there, so it makes sense to ask and learn.

Hey, if you haven't seen it before, a few lines down from this thread on the main Richmond index page is a thread with the above title. Kind gents like Zcochran00 and JZLizard set up the thread, poured over THOUSANDS of posts and created this virtual "How To" reference. There is actually a section there: Meet & Greets (post #4).

http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/sh...366&viewfull=1#post2480366.

NOTE: while the links work & take you to the post, the numbers are off a bit. For example, the hotlink took me to Varooms post, but it showed #222, not the listed #226. Probably some site maintenace issue that knocked the numbers off?

Not to stifle any discussion here as there are a wide range of opinions and approached to the bowl. Perhaps one has game / luck and the M&G is a formality prior to a visit to the FC? Otherwise it is just like any other relationship or first date. She is feeling you out as to safety, attraction, seriousness, etc. As a SD you want to do similar things- measure your attraction, her stability get a feel for her willingness.

What was initially written has me scratching my head, and perhaps that is on me for reading too much into this. But the M&G should not be too terribly socially awkward. 1) One could do a M&G only after one knows a bit about the girl such that it is just the meeting of old friends. 2) If one shows up and is nervous, unsure or hesitant it is possible that will show through to the girl and things will go badly. (remember- SBs often like confident successful men) 3) Hopefully one isn't chasing just any skirt because she is young, so part of the M&G is the little head pounding away at you to close the deal with such an attractive girl! But if one looks desperate or too eager to hit the FC, that can be a turn off too.

So it is a fine dance, seeped in psychology, gamesmanship and chemistry. Many approaches, many styles. Not one right for every situation.

Good Luck!

[JZLizard]

LIke everything, it comes at a price -- for both parties. I see who searches me, but if they -- like I do -- have a premium membership and enable their privacy settings, all it will show me is "Someone in the Finance Industry in Chicago" viewed your profile. If you live in a big enough city, she won't have a clue its you.

But unless they are very active linkedin users, they probably don't check their profile much until its job hunting time, and by them you would have banged them senseless.

It's been a while since I used linkedin at all, but the last time I did, I believe it sent me an email notification when someone viewed my profile letting me know who. They may have changed how it works since then.

Aside from that, however, around that time I swore off linkedin altogether, because I found the real drawback was simply the fact that a girl would get informed that I viewed her. The account was under a fake name, so it wasn't revealing my identity, but I think just the simple fact that I was researching them by their real name freaked them out, because I lost a couple of girls (they went unresponsive for no reason, which is rare with girls I've already got an established dialog with) right after I clicked on their linkedin profile.

In other words I don't think linkedin is worth the risks, personally. I abandoned my bogus account years ago.

[FarFarAway]

IS it possible to search on LinkedIn or look at profiles anonymously? If I am looking around there for dates or a baby I sure am not interested in letting a SB know my real name, work location, etc, just in case she goes wacko on me. So is there a way to do that and keep the lives separate?

I agree that Google Images doesn't always come up with matches. Bur is there some other way to search a particular image on FB? Or is there an Instagram image search tool? Always interested in alternative or new methods.

CL. I don't believe that Google is able to access photos on FB, so that is why there is a failure of image search to find those. I caution everyone about using SM sites to search for girls based on their email or phone #s. This is typically available to you only if you are a member. Be sure to use a profile that is not you personally. On FB, I have a 'commercial' profile I could use. It is no longer possible to establish a fake FB, they will ask for address info, etc. , and if you don't provide it the page is killed. It happened to me. IDK about LinkedIn, I don't know if you can set up something that's fake. It would be fine if you did. However, I don't trust them at all. When I had my real profile on LinkedIn, it was always suggesting contacts to me, based on some other application. Email or whatever. I did not trust it, so got off the site.

On FB, after I have searched for a few girls, I will log on and go to the "Edit" function in the search bar. There you will see everyone you have searched for. FB says 'only you have access to this info', but of course *they have access to it. So, I delete all of it, so there are no mishaps where they suggest that page as a friend to the POT, and by looking backwards she can figure out who I am.

On a couple of other SB threads, there is discussion of a *very active* campaign of getting profile pics and numbers from SA, and posting them on a predator site (seeking $ to get the post removed). This can obviously be a HUGE problem for those of us w / SOs. Be careful who you give pic access to. Use GV for your burner.

[Cabsauv1997]

I don't post often, and have not dipped my foot in the bowl. Not sure I even want to, but somehow love living vicariously here. Guessing I'm not alone in that regard.

Anyway, I've read a LOT of postings on this board that briefly refer to or describe a meet & greet, but never in any significant detail. I'd love to learn how you all approach these.

Obviously you meet at an agreed-upon public place, but once you recognize one another, this is where I get curious:

- Is it ever immediately awkward when you see her, she sees you, and your age difference is so stark that you feel guilty for even being there? (I know this sounds judgmental, it isn't intended that way. I think one thing holding me back is fear of how to behave in these types of situations / combinations that I have absolutely no experience with).

- Once you get over any initial awkward feelings, do you approach the conversation from a "tell me about yourself" standpoint?

- Is it more "what do we both want out of this / what got you to want to do this?" kind of discussion?

- Do you approach it as more of a first date or more of an interview? I realize there are problems with the analogy because a first date is often a vetting process, even if we don't call it that.).

Examples of M&G that have gone really poorly and really well?

Inching closer.

Cab.

[Ernest Ll]

IS it possible to search on LinkedIn or look at profiles anonymously? .

LIke everything, it comes at a price -- for both parties. I see who searches me, but if they -- like I do -- have a premium membership and enable their privacy settings, all it will show me is "Someone in the Finance Industry in Chicago" viewed your profile. If you live in a big enough city, she won't have a clue its you.

But unless they are very active linkedin users, they probably don't check their profile much until its job hunting time, and by them you would have banged them senseless.

[Cephlapod Love]

You'd be surprised what you can find on LinkedIn and other business sites when fishing for 20 somethings.

A shocking number of them use a LinkedIn photo in the galleries, or their profile photo for tutoring or dog walking services. But the LinkedIn search function is gold.

Was messaging a grad student in Boston, who later revealed she was in Providence at Brown, but willing to drive. She told me her major and undergrad school. Guess what, there is only one person at Brown for Grad School that went to SDSU for undergrad. I've used alma mater and industry to verify an advertising account exec in Chicago.

Google reverse image search is probably only 50% accurate. I've been surprised how many times I've used it, found nothing, but found them by other means and there is half their profile gallery on facebook or instagram with no matches.

IS it possible to search on LinkedIn or look at profiles anonymously? If I am looking around there for dates or a baby I sure am not interested in letting a SB know my real name, work location, etc, just in case she goes wacko on me. So is there a way to do that and keep the lives separate?

I agree that Google Images doesn't always come up with matches. Bur is there some other way to search a particular image on FB? Or is there an Instagram image search tool? Always interested in alternative or new methods.

[JZLizard]

We talk a lot about daddy issues here in the Richmond thread, I guess this is an extreme case.

https://www.yahoo.com/news/dad-arres...202329079.html

I've heard of guys that don't mind risking it all by playing close to home, but this redefines what close to home means.

[Madaboutmax]

Finally met with an attractive 22 yo girl I had been texting for months. We agreed to meet for dinner with no guarantee of intimacy.

Dinner went well and we made out like teenagers in the parking lot of the restaurant. She agreed to come back to my room. She spent all night and we went 4 enthusiastic rounds. She enjoyed exploring her submissive side. She initially refused my offer to contribute to her college fund, but eventually accepted.

She has since been texting me reliving that night and asking for a repeat without my contributions.

Many younger girls crave attention from an attractive, confident, successful older man that treats them well and knows what he is doing in the bedroom.

Definitely the type of experience I pursue. Good looking woman, freaky all nighter for less than the cost of an escort. It takes some game, patience and investment in time.

I definitely will repeat and this is not the type of girl who could be "shared".

In my pursuit of "Amateur" SBs, I've learned a few things I've found to be important.

1) I catch them right after they first join. Like its been said, before they get jaded or chased away by the p4p offers.

2) I have a profile pic and an interesting profile, but not arrogant profile. Show a sense of humor and humility.

3) I compliment them in my first message and demonstrate I read their profile. Many are looking to be treated better then guys their age so I play the part by being a gentleman.

4) I share my success in past long term arrangements. Most newbies want someone who knows what they are doing and can show them the ropes.

5) I express an interest in developing a friendship, but not a serious relationship. They don't want to feel like escorts, but also don't want a boyfriend.

6) I make sure they know I understand the concept of an allowance, but never discuss specifics and that I make it clear i won't try to be the highest bidder. This weeds out the gps girls.

7) I subtly introduce my interest in intimacy, but i don't focus on it. This makes them feel like less of an escort, but also weeds the platonic girls.

8) I move offline quickly. I need to get them before they get jaded and disable their profile.

9) I don't push too hard, because I don't want to appear desperate or spook them away.

10) I schedule a meet and greet quickly. I never provide an allowance for the meet and greet, but also make it clear there are no expectations from them.

11) I always show a sense of humor. This takes the tension out of the discussion ad helps then feel comfortable.

12) I expect this to take a lot of work and I get rejected often, but I enjoy the challenge and the hunt. Persistence has paid off. Finding a straight p4 p deal with an escort doesn't meet my need for the "thrill of the chase".

I've had some great experiences that keep me coming back for more. I've had all night multiple rounds with extremely beautiful and freeky women where we never discussed an allowance (I've just slipped them something on their way out). This type of "relationship" allows many women to explore their freeky side in a comfortable non-judgemental setting.

I'm sure I've missed some other points and would be interested in things others do to pursue the elusive "Amateur" SB.

[S2568]

The latina offered to do me for 350 but I kind did not respond, may be will try again another time.

https://www.seekingarrangement.com/m...c-b481b8c28360

This girl used to be on Backpage like two years ago. Worst tits I've ever seen, but there is something unique about a girl who's 4'8" (her profile says 4'9", but I think that's their lowest choice because I know she told me 4'8") I think she charged $120 or $140 for a half hour. The number I had for her doesn't work anymore, and my SA isn't paid currently, so I'm stuck waiting to see if she accepts my FB friend request for me to have a way to contact her because I'd like to hook up with her again.

https://www.seekingarrangement.com/m...7-4110f5a7f419

I haven't met this one yet, but I offered her $400 to come over and she agreed. High, but that body is killer enough to do it once. She's out of town for school most of the time so I haven't yet been able to line up a weekend where she was here and I was feeling rich enough to do it.

[S2568]

Is she from SA, what is her profile name if you can share, please.

Big pot head. Not that pretty, maybe a 6 but a body and attitude that is a 10. The girl knows how to please a man. Two hours, two shots, and $$. 5. She never skipped a beat when I told her let's go again. The girl definitely has skills. Almost total deep throat. She told me she practices with a dildo. Got to love it.

They are there for the picking but one has to be patient. It's also $ and time intensive.

[S2568]

Unless you have some cash to shell out like half a grand and nothing less. Took her out to lunch and charged me $ for just being in her presence and BTW this was not agreed upon, has some arrest record down south next state!

Any body had experience with ArtAndHappiness to share?

She seems like cool Indian chic. Richmond mongers should have an experience to share. Feel free to PM please.

[Ernest Ll]

You'd be surprised what you can find on LinkedIn and other business sites when fishing for 20 somethings.

A shocking number of them use a LinkedIn photo in the galleries, or their profile photo for tutoring or dog walking services. But the LinkedIn search function is gold.

Was messaging a grad student in Boston, who later revealed she was in Providence at Brown, but willing to drive. She told me her major and undergrad school. Guess what, there is only one person at Brown for Grad School that went to SDSU for undergrad. I've used alma mater and industry to verify an advertising account exec in Chicago.

Google reverse image search is probably only 50% accurate. I've been surprised how many times I've used it, found nothing, but found them by other means and there is half their profile gallery on facebook or instagram with no matches.