Massage Parlor Reports

[Confucius]

Is a paid membership worth it?

I was also a member for a year.

If you like fake reviews. Not all, and comedians in training who hijack your threads and impose their useless will on you and what you say, then this is the place for you.

Guys from all over the country have access to anything you say and some of them try to be humorous but are really not funny at all.

Their personalities are birth control.

I would never join that place again.

[GunnerMagnum]

Absolutely not. To many clowns on there who do fake reviews. The funniest one I saw was someone went to Geneva spa and clearly stated the only parking was on the street. Anyone whose been knows the parking lot is huge. He got called out on it. The forums are even more ridiculous as they are not moderated.

Is a paid membership worth it?

[Toe Knee]

Not in my opinion.

A few years ago I was a paying member there and after visiting several reviewed establishments I found that some of the reviews were just not true. I have always found better and more reliable information here at USASG.

AJ.

Exactly. Once I discovered USASG I pretty much canceled my membership.

[Avg Joe]

Is a paid membership worth it?

Not in my opinion.

A few years ago I was a paying member there and after visiting several reviewed establishments I found that some of the reviews were just not true. I have always found better and more reliable information here at USASG.

AJ.

[Casper27]

Is a paid membership worth it?

[Wenger]

Sylvio said it best years ago! When getting ready to visit a spa, treat it as if you're going on an actual date. Stinky unclean guys are a turn off for most ladies! If you hope to go for gold, you have to be prepared. Don't stink and don't be a jerk. It's always worked well for me!

And if it's not an option to go before work, make sure to take the shower option first. And if it's a standup shower, ask them to help. Always works out best for me and sets the tone in a positive light.

-w.

[Magooski]

The lady at a place I was going for a while always mentioned that she appreciated how clean I was. She told me if a guy smells she gets a hot towel and cleans him up and does not mention why.

Sylvio said it best years ago! When getting ready to visit a spa, treat it as if you're going on an actual date. Stinky unclean guys are a turn off for most ladies! If you hope to go for gold, you have to be prepared. Don't stink and don't be a jerk. It's always worked well for me!

[Frogger7777]

Hey guys. Can anyone recommend a younger masseuse who works out of her house in or near the northwest suburbs? I've gone to Silvia. Love the setup, and she's nice enough, but she's older than I prefer (I'm in my mid-30's). Would prefer a provider near my own age. PM if you want to keep on the down low.

[GunnerMagnum]

The lady at a place I was going for a while always mentioned that she appreciated how clean I was. She told me if a guy smells she gets a hot towel and cleans him up and does not mention why.

Hell, I make sure I've shaved, put on cologne and make sure I'm fresh as possible. If I've sweat between leaving the house and the massage, I'll either get the table shower upfront or ask to use the shower first.

[Paleface]

Hell, I make sure I've shaved, put on cologne and make sure I'm fresh as possible. If I've sweat between leaving the house and the massage, I'll either get the table shower upfront or ask to use the shower first.

I like these remarks. I would throw in some breath mints. Do your laundry. That t-shirt you've been sleeping in for week might smell okay to you, but it's not so pleasant to anyone downwind of you. Don't forget the shampoo. Your shoes stink, even if you don't know it. Forget about your socks.

We really need to be respectful of these girls. No need to state the many reasons why.

[LoveDDs]

I've been trying for 3 days to reach the Sunny's List Asian ladies and no answer. I know they've been around a long time because there are hundreds of reviews on TER for them, but right now I can not get them on the phone. Anyone have any idea what the deal is?

[MrSmartyPants]

I don't know a legit MT, but your pricing doesn't look right.

90 minutes $79.95 $10.00 too low.

60 minutes $49.95 $10.00 too low.

30 minutes $29.95 30 minutes shouldn't be offered. Legit needs some time. All 30 minutes will do is get you off at a discount.

The $0. 95 pricing might fool 'them at the discount stores, but people looking for a legit massage know they are NOT going to get $0. 05 in change.

Yes, (for your area anyway) you're a bit on the low side. I get most of my massages in Wisconsin (Milwaukee / Racine / Kenosha) where the rates are significantly lower than IL, especially if you know where to look. (My favorite legit place is $44/ hr, $60/90, and $74/2 hours, and most of girls are excellent, but it's almost an hour drive.) But I assume rent and taxes are way higher in IL so I don't know how feasible it is staying a little below the others.

On the other hand your slightly lower door pricing DOES get some of us in the door who might not make the drive to BG otherwise.

Wish I knew HOW my Milwaukee place keeps finding really good MT's. One of my favorites there (a young one with a too-boyish haircut) came from Las Vegas, because she WANTED to see snow. She's fantastic and mixes in a bunch of Thai moves as well.

Also agree that most tip better when door fee is lower. (& when they know the MT is Bob's girlfriend and don't want to look like a cheap schmuck.).

Oh. Yes. Drop the. 95 thing and just make it even dollars. Just because I say so, and it's a OCD oriented pet peeve of mine, LOL.

[Bob521]

That's very sound advice. I will follow it. We do have a part time American woman who is very capable. An American man, also part time, who is also good (for women) and we will meet somebody new on Saturday.

I also meant to follow up on something Lurker said: Eating my own seed corn. Perhaps Mei is eating the corn since she won't take time off. But I'm not eating. I gave her the store and do various accounting, legal, marketing and handyman tasks. I take no share of any profits. It was never about money for me. I just want her to have a good life. Bob.

I don't have solution for you Bob since you already know that the solution is to get more capable LMTs. Just a couple of comments.

1) I would not price discriminate between people who make appt vs walk ins. Once people know that, no one is going to do walk in. While it might help with appt scheduling, it does not solve your underlying issue of Mei getting burned out.

2) Maybe stop advertising for a couple of weeks as it sounds like you have enough business for now anyway.

3) Add a referral program. For each new client a guy sends, he gets $10 off on his next visit. Each quarter, the guy who sends the most people wins a prize. My dentist does this and it's very effective.

[BonerLander]

Had a lovely deep tissue Massage on the north side by a hard working MT who worked up a sweat by the end. While working on my back she paused, took a cleansing breath, and told me that I smell wonderfully. (I showered the night before and use deodorant appropriately.) she made a disgusted sound and told me of her other client. On my way out I saw a monger in the foyer hunched over in his parka. It was 30' outside and sunny. He looked like a homeless Jerry Garcia.

As mentioned by others it doesn't take much for us to be presentable. Clean, Polite, pay. We expect much. We should be deserving.

End of rant.

Hell, I make sure I've shaved, put on cologne and make sure I'm fresh as possible. If I've sweat between leaving the house and the massage, I'll either get the table shower upfront or ask to use the shower first.

[GunnerMagnum]

Good advice!

I don't have solution for you Bob since you already know that the solution is to get more capable LMTs. Just a couple of comments.

1) I would not price discriminate between people who make appt vs walk ins. Once people know that, no one is going to do walk in. While it might help with appt scheduling, it does not solve your underlying issue of Mei getting burned out.

2) Maybe stop advertising for a couple of weeks as it sounds like you have enough business for now anyway.

3) Add a referral program. For each new client a guy sends, he gets $10 off on his next visit. Each quarter, the guy who sends the most people wins a prize. My dentist does this and it's very effective.