"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[TravelinSD]

I seem to be hitting up the wrong 19 y / o girls. The last two wanted me to take them to a water park and Dave & Busters game place. I'm over 55 and way out of place hanging with them there. The ones that want to go FC are straight UTR escorts so far. Guess I'm going to stick with a mid 30's that likes have adult fun although I long for a young petite spinner who is not a pro.

If you want to play with the 18-19 yo, you have to be young at heart or at least act that way. Isn't that part of the fun. Reliving your youth through the eyes of maturity?

Good hunting!

Travelin.

[HollywoodGuy]

I seem to be hitting up the wrong 19 y / o girls. The last two wanted me to take them to a water park and Dave & Busters game place. I'm over 55 and way out of place hanging with them there. The ones that want to go FC are straight UTR escorts so far. Guess I'm going to stick with a mid 30's that likes have adult fun although I long for a young petite spinner who is not a pro.

You have to put in the work.

[ToeLover57]

I seem to be hitting up the wrong 19 y / o girls. The last two wanted me to take them to a water park and Dave & Busters game place. I'm over 55 and way out of place hanging with them there. The ones that want to go FC are straight UTR escorts so far. Guess I'm going to stick with a mid 30's that likes have adult fun although I long for a young petite spinner who is not a pro.

[JZLizard]

Does going to the police necessarily have to involve the spouse? Can I not file a complaint without being asked about things not pertinent to the complaint?

I'm not sure about this much. In theory it shouldn't but it seems like you have a risk of a deputy showing up at your doorstep or calling you at inopportune times.

In general, the law enforcement community does not take kindly to complaints from a non-innocent victim about a slightly more guilty one. So, if you do call the cops for anything MAKE SURE she does not have texts of you offering her money for sex. There have been cases about this before posted in other forums on USASG and they typically will charge both parties with whatever they can, including soliciting or whatever.

In other words if have followed my rule about never offering money up front and gifting after the fact only, you can be free and clear of all of this and it will be treated as a BF / GF domestic issue. Be very careful about any history of e-mails or texts she may have.

[JZLizard]

Or does it vary from state to state? This is one thing I have no protection against. I do not travel for work so I have to play in the home town. Oh well!

Playing in the hometown is dangerous for a number of reasons, IMO. The ability to lookup online plates using public record websites varies from state to state I'm sure, but if she can come up with fifty to a hundred bucks to pay a detective, she can find out anything about you from it.

My "three rules" are meant to go together as a package, meaning if you must bypass one of the rules (and play in your hometown) you might need to bypass another rule and just go for UTR escort girls who are pay by the hour agreed on up front. This is because they are less likely to be dependent on you solely for support than the type of arrangement a true SB would be looking for.

I don't have direct experience with that but do you see what's just happened there? Foregoing one rule requires you forego a second rule in order to mitigate risk, in effect borrowing from Peter at twice the interest rate in order to pay what you promised Paul.

In that case it's better to just do the BP thing. At least at that point you are dealing with escorts who do not care to think about your financial position. With SBs you are saying "Hey Babe! I'm loaded and probably married, an excellent blackmail target if you're interested".

[Telcova]

Looking for recommendations in Woodbrigde and Manassas. I'm lining up a couple POTS and want to get my ducks in a row.

PM prefered.

Thanks.

[PghGuy2005]

...
3. Retain your anonymity as much as possible, even avoiding letting them see your license plate.

Lots of folks will disagree, and in truth I doubt many operate by those rules -- but without them, for married guys at least it's not a question of if it will come crashing down, it is a question of when.

Or does it vary from state to state? This is one thing I have no protection against. I do not travel for work so I have to play in the home town. Oh well!

[PghGuy2005]

...Also be sure to regularly delete your fb search history. Failing to do so will lead your SO to ask why you are stalking 19 year old on fb. Unless your a college professor or mentor, you may find it hard to explain your fb search history.

Lastly, do not tie your hotel room purchases to your gmail account. Some hotel reservation sites. E. g. hotels.com, will auto update your gmail calendar with the dates of your stay. If your SO has access to your private calendar, it may be difficult to explain why you're staying at a Hotel in the city you live, during the weekend you're out of town.

Just my two cents.

DO NOT use phone / email known to SO for any hobby related task. Same with FB do not use an account known to SO and others for hobbying create a separate account.

Mentally assume a different identity while hobbying and it will be easier.

[PghGuy2005]

I think the best browser to use for privacy is Firefox. I use it for my extracurricular activities. Its privacy settings are the best, and you can ask it to forget any website. Once it forgets, it forgets. It won't autofill in the name of any naughty website for you.

With the other browsers, you WILL forget to go private or incognito, and type in a naughty website in the browser bar. When you do that, you will have no other choice but to delete the browser from your hard drivev and reinstall it.

Not so with Firefox.

Ctrl+Shift+Delete brings up the clear history dialog on FireFox, Chrome and IE. On FF and Chrome you can choose to clear only for the past hour, today etc but with IE everything is wiped out so it may look suspicious if IE has no history!

Make it a habit to switch to private / incognito browsing on phone / computer / tablet before playing.

[Rouleur]

Does going to the police necessarily have to involve the spouse? Can I not file a complaint without being asked about things not pertinent to the complaint?

A good question and I don't know the answer. My way of thinking in this particular circumstance was, since the spouse apparently now knows about the SD / SB arrangement, there was no reason not to involve the police if needed. Again I like your question because it would be great to be preemptive in shutting down the SB's threats before too much damage is done. I hope anyone that knows the answer will chime in.

[PghGuy2005]

... After you "fessed up" , if the SB piece of shit still harasses you in any way, I'd go to the Police and get a restraining order tagged to her ass ...

Does going to the police necessarily have to involve the spouse? Can I not file a complaint without being asked about things not pertinent to the complaint?

[JZLizard]

Maybe more married guys are like me? I value the relationship with my wife on all levels except sexually. I'm boring, it's forced, it's almost scheduled on the calendar. Kind of predictable. For me the SD thing is like an exciting hobby. Some guys play golf. I bang young chicks. Could it blow up in my face? I suppose. I get the general feeling my wife knows I'm having things taken care of in some way but pretends not to know. Life is pretty good for her and our kids are still pretty young so family disruption is avoided. That said I'm still very cautious and work hard to be stealth.

On one hand, I'd say that's double the risk for the same reward -- getting caught would then mean both financial and emotional devastation, losing someone that you want in your life (perhaps even having your kids hate you for screwing up their family). It's a great deal to lose all just for an exciting hobby. On the other hand, I believe that it can be done in moderation, perhaps even on an ongoing basis, with enough caution (particularly the three rules I posted).

My "need" for the exciting hobby is similar to yours. There is nothing interesting about sex with my girlfriend -- I can't even say it's something I particularly look forward to, it's just something I do in order to satisfy a need, sort of like eating when you're hungry. We don't always get the gourmet meal full of variety by the globally recognized chef of the year for every dinner meal, but as long as we put ourselves in an adult state of mind and realize that life does not entitle us to that, then we are happy to eat whatever we normally eat. Happiness and / or contentment truly comes from within -- we decide if we are happy with what we have or whether we always need more.

I've learned that I can't have everything I want in life, and that is the nature of the human mind to demand more than what we have, regardless of what we do have. And, that the key to true happiness is learning to counter-balance that regretful side of human nature by learning to appreciate what we have instead of always wanting something else.

Thinking like that has taken me a long time and lot of hard-earned lessons. But I'm damn glad I learned to do it.

I still like strange pussy as much as the next guy. But I'll be damned if I'm going to fuck up and lose the important things in life over it.

[FTP1999]

Too bad SA doesn't have like a one-day membership.

This POT I'm dying to hear from messaged me on SA even though she has my text and email. She is probably telling me to fuck off (nicely) but the fact that she may be opening a door is there as a possibility. Kills me that I can't read the message. I am not going to get a one-month membership just for that.

[FTP1999]

STOP< THIEF -- friend reports that.

https://www.seekingarrangement.com/m...ecently-active - LynnB93 robbed him on 3rd meeting.

"a girl I met twice in private before ran on me, taking all my cash ($600). She played well- said she just had her wisdom teeth removed and very painful. Asked me to go to the front desk to get Advil. I followed her instructions and she just left with my wallet! Luckily, she did not steal anything else like my laptop (could have been a disaster if she had done that). But gosh I was trusting her too much and got fooled by her. We had two physical meetings before! ".

[HoyaSvnFgr]

So the JL situation is: values relationship and doesn't want to lose it, but has no risk of losing money.

Whereas it seems the common married SD situation is: does not value relationship, but has huge risk of financial loss by getting caught.

Maybe more married guys are like me? I value the relationship with my wife on all levels except sexually. I'm boring, it's forced, it's almost scheduled on the calendar. Kind of predictable. For me the SD thing is like an exciting hobby. Some guys play golf. I bang young chicks. Could it blow up in my face? I suppose. I get the general feeling my wife knows I'm having things taken care of in some way but pretends not to know. Life is pretty good for her and our kids are still pretty young so family disruption is avoided. That said I'm still very cautious and work hard to be stealth.

I started in The Bowl when my marriage was near ending. I entered The Bowl full on and felt no need to be stealth. I was private in my interactions, but not OCD about it. The financial implications of my divorce was already a reality for me. The Bowl was sort of my break away from everything. It's funny because when I started SB dating my marriage started improving. I was more pleasant and in a better mood all the time.