"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[Rouleur]

What percentage do you guys civi date vs sugar date. For me its 100% sugar. I mean really, at 60 where am I going to hook-up with any kinky 18 to 22 year olds (or any age for that matter). And yes I have read some very interesting approaches to doing that. But they don't work for a old school desk jockey, new school internet geek like me.

Maybe my perspective will change in time but, as a Man just months out of a 24 year marriage, I don't see ever going to civi dating. I'm 56 and in decent shape. I am truly amazed how old women my age range look! I've never been someone who could fck a personality. I need old fashioned physical attraction and I'm not seeing that in my decade. By the way my Ex is 40 so I was a bit spoiled in some ways these last 24 years.

Despite my rough start, I am sure that the SD / SB life is the one for me.

[FotoGuy1970]

What percentage do you guys civi date vs sugar date. For me its 100% sugar. I mean really, at 60 where am I going to hook-up with any kinky 18 to 22 year olds (or any age for that matter). And yes I have read some very interesting approaches to doing that. But they don't work for a old school desk jockey, new school internet geek like me.

100% sugar dating for me. I have zero interest in traditional long-term relationships.

[JZLizard]

I guess what I meant was. What percentage outside the SO relationship if you have one. So in your case I guess 100% of the time.

Oh. In that case, yes when straying from the SO relationship I would be 100% SD. Although I did sign up for a couple of civy sites this past season, but I made clear in my profile that I was looking for an SB, and that does not attract much action on civy sites. The one exception might be POF, which makes it easier than most civy sites to hit up the disproportionately young POTS. I did not bang anyone I met on POF but to be honest that was mostly because in only one month out of the year, all the girls "look new", and just keeping up with the ones on the SB sites are a chore, so no time or energy left for POF. I have met some good younger, free fuck buddies on POF in the past that were looking to date but probably would have been open to SD / SB under the right conditions. Just a matter of casting a wide net -- as they say like sex itself, the more you put in the more you get out. Invest time in POF and you'll get some good stuff but it may take more emails.

The basic issue with civy sites is that they are designed to produce matches, so unless the girl specifies she has an open upper age range (and some of them do, its just that they seem rare compared to on the SB sites), you'll find the pickings slim. This of course becomes increasingly disadvantageous as you get older, assuming you enter your real age. I usually try to shave a few years off my age in my profile and I explain it to them later. I will probably shave more years off as I get older as long as I can physically get away with it.

[HollywoodGuy]

I'm not 32 anymore but I can tell you that hooking up with 18-22 year olds in the civy world is tough even at that age, because you're competing with every horny prick that's between 18 and 40 for the same piece of ass even if you are in your early 30's!. And, in the civy world they are looking at the dude with the same scrutiny we would be looking at a long-term partner, the only difference in the male vs. Female perspective being that if we see them as having no future potential, we ask ourselves "well are they at least fuckable?" while in the civy world, if you have no future potential to them, you're excluded as early as possible.

I can never remember a time in civy dating where I didn't have to be constantly on the hunt. SD'ing is different because once there is money on the table, there's always some young thing that needs to pay the bills, or is a closet pro, or whatever.

In civy dating you don't try for young hotties once you're over a certain age. You do find them sometimes if you're in good shape and attractive for your age, but you are thankful when you find something good that's in the 10-15 year younger range. You can detect them on the civy sites by their desired specified age range, but for the most part they are few and far between. Sometimes you encounter a real treat that makes all the hunting and legwork worthwhile. Honestly once they get over 30 anything is possible because their clock is ticking loud to them at that point, so if you find a good 30-35 year old sometimes you get your nuts rocked in ways these SBs cannot compare to. Yet, if you date them it won't last much longer, especially if you're like me and you have no intention of having kids so the load is going either in their mouth, on their tits, in their hair or if things get really bad onto your keyboard. Some of the best pussy you get in the 28-35 range is from single moms who want a baby daddy and to me that sounds a lot like sugar daddy but with emotional obligations as well as financial.

What you're really looking for in civy dating is (ideally) a satisfying long term partner, but knowing how elusive that is, you're looking to get the best possible free sex (well, it always costs doesn't it? Dinner, etc).

In my case I like having someone to spend time with each evening that doesn't drive me crazy, so if I were single right now I would be looking for a partner first, sexual satisfaction second. It would be great to find an ideal companion to spend time with just hanging out, watching TV or movies, dining, etc that also rocks my world sexually and leaves me uninterested in outside encounters, but I find that unrealistic in my case. I just crave variety so it doesn't seem possible. In the big scheme of things I actually feel somewhat proud of the fact that I only become an SD when my GF travels overseas to visit with her family. I'm faithful the rest of the time and probably wouldn't misbehave if she didn't leave me alone. My mind works in creative ways when I'm alone.

So, how as far as % time spent civy, I think it depends on how much you prefer a partner / companion compared to just sex. The variety is addictive, but of course the difference is that if you get sick tomorrow your partner will at least shed a tear and drive you to surgery, whereas the SBs won't have anything to do with you once they know the ATM machine is out of order. It just comes down to individual priorities. I'd love to have more months out of the year to do the SB thing but no matter how much we have there's never enough, so I try to appreciate what I have now and not get greedy.

I guess what I meant was. What percentage outside the SO relationship if you have one. So in your case I guess 100% of the time.

[JZLizard]

What percentage do you guys civi date vs sugar date. For me its 100% sugar. I mean really, at 60 where am I going to hook-up with any kinky 18 to 22 year olds (or any age for that matter). And yes I have read some very interesting approaches to doing that. But they don't work for a old school desk jockey, new school internet geek like me.

I'm not 32 anymore but I can tell you that hooking up with 18-22 year olds in the civy world is tough even at that age, because you're competing with every horny prick that's between 18 and 40 for the same piece of ass even if you are in your early 30's!. And, in the civy world they are looking at the dude with the same scrutiny we would be looking at a long-term partner, the only difference in the male vs. Female perspective being that if we see them as having no future potential, we ask ourselves "well are they at least fuckable?" while in the civy world, if you have no future potential to them, you're excluded as early as possible.

I can never remember a time in civy dating where I didn't have to be constantly on the hunt. SD'ing is different because once there is money on the table, there's always some young thing that needs to pay the bills, or is a closet pro, or whatever. SD'ing is easier and more satisfying short-term. Civy dating is needed only if I don't have someone, and would like to not live the rest of life (outside the bed) alone and/or hopefully have someone around when I'm 90.

In civy dating you don't try for young hotties once you're over a certain age. You do find them sometimes if you're in good shape and attractive for your age, but you are thankful when you find something good that's in the 10-15 year younger range. You can detect them on the civy sites by their desired specified age range, but for the most part they are few and far between. Sometimes you encounter a real treat that makes all the hunting and legwork worthwhile. Honestly once they get over 30 anything is possible because their clock is ticking loud to them at that point, so if you find a good 30-35 year old sometimes you get your nuts rocked in ways these SBs cannot compare to. Yet, if you date them it won't last much longer, especially if you're like me and you have no intention of having kids so the load is going either in their mouth, on their tits, in their hair or if things get really bad onto your keyboard. Some of the best pussy you get in the 28-35 range is from single moms who want a baby daddy and to me that sounds a lot like sugar daddy but with emotional obligations as well as financial.

What you're really looking for in civy dating is (ideally) a satisfying long term partner, but knowing how elusive that is, you're looking to get the best possible free sex (well, it always costs doesn't it? Dinner, etc).

In my case I like having someone to spend time with each evening that doesn't drive me crazy, so if I were single right now I would be looking for a partner first, sexual satisfaction second. It would be great to find an ideal companion to spend time with just hanging out, watching TV or movies, dining, etc that also rocks my world sexually and leaves me uninterested in outside encounters, but I find that unrealistic in my case. I just crave variety so it doesn't seem possible. In the big scheme of things I actually feel somewhat proud of the fact that I only become an SD when my GF travels overseas to visit with her family. I'm faithful the rest of the time and probably wouldn't misbehave if she didn't leave me alone. My mind works in creative ways when I'm alone. The formula that seems to be working for me is a largely satisfying, "meaningful" relationship 11 months out of the year and then 1 month out of the year where I travel everywhere within a 6 hour radius fucking everything I can

So, how as far as % time spent civy, I think it depends on how much you prefer a partner / companion compared to just sex. The variety is addictive, but of course the difference is that if you get sick tomorrow your partner will at least shed a tear and drive you to surgery, whereas the SBs won't have anything to do with you once they know the ATM machine is out of order. It just comes down to individual priorities. I'd love to have more months out of the year to do the SB thing but no matter how much we have there's never enough, so I try to appreciate what I have now and not get greedy.

[HollywoodGuy]

Maybe I am doing something very wrong, but I do not need excel to keep it organized. I am a relative newbe too. I have found if you don't meet within a week of first contact you are toast? After first meet if no FC within a week forget about it. Should I save "could if beens" for future contact? I looking for quality, not quantity- does that change the approach?

For example: I was heading to ATL today from TN. Planed SB has been flaking lately. Sent out some requests on WYP. Had a response and planned a dinner meet and greet. 21 first day on WYP really excited about the SD thing. No FC but nice make out session by her car. FC scheduled for Thursday. If no Thursday I move on. If no Thursday, should contact info be saved? When would you make contact again?

A lot of these girls will hit you up a week, a month even a year later. I save every girls info I have had physical contact with. Thats a lot of girls. Also have at least 10 POTS at any given moment and maybe 7 different ones I hook up with a month. So it helps. And I dont like them all in my contacts on my phone. Too many horror stories of lost or damaged phones.

[Dolato]

Maybe I am doing something very wrong, but I do not need excel to keep it organized. I am a relative newbe too. I have found if you don't meet within a week of first contact you are toast? After first meet if no FC within a week forget about it. Should I save "could if beens" for future contact? I looking for quality, not quantity- does that change the approach?

For example: I was heading to ATL today from TN. Planed SB has been flaking lately. Sent out some requests on WYP. Had a response and planned a dinner meet and greet. 21 first day on WYP really excited about the SD thing. No FC but nice make out session by her car. FC scheduled for Thursday. If no Thursday I move on. If no Thursday, should contact info be saved? When would you make contact again?

I'm sure it's different for everyone. I follow Hollywood's suggestion to play the numbers game. I send out alot of messages and keep track of the ones that respond back. I keep the details for the sake of prioritizing and convenience. If they fall through I move them over to another tab and just keep the active ones on the main tab.

I may send out a text / email to some that didn't FC if I think there's a possibility after they've dealt with some idiots / jerks. I had one that I was able to take to the FC by following up, so that keeps me thinking it can happen again.

[CaneBay]

Maybe I am doing something very wrong, but I do not need excel to keep it organized. I am a relative newbe too. I have found if you don't meet within a week of first contact you are toast? After first meet if no FC within a week forget about it. Should I save "could if beens" for future contact? I looking for quality, not quantity- does that change the approach?

For example: I was heading to ATL today from TN. Planed SB has been flaking lately. Sent out some requests on WYP. Had a response and planned a dinner meet and greet. 21 first day on WYP really excited about the SD thing. No FC but nice make out session by her car. FC scheduled for Thursday. If no Thursday I move on. If no Thursday, should contact info be saved? When would you make contact again?

[HollywoodGuy]

What percentage do you guys civi date vs sugar date. For me its 100% sugar. I mean really, at 60 where am I going to hook-up with any kinky 18 to 22 year olds (or any age for that matter). And yes I have read some very interesting approaches to doing that. But they don't work for a old school desk jockey, new school internet geek like me.

[JZLizard]

My approach to organizing them is mostly e-mail based until they become someone I will likely meet (or that I'm really interested in meeting if I'm in their city), then I basically "open a file on them" for lack of better term, where they have their own folder within a hierarchy that contains everything I have on them.

For example, in my e-mail client I have topmost folders with the four digit year number, then under each year, the name of each city, but usually the city represents some general 50-100 mile radius (I.e. I would not have Alexandria VA and Bethesda MD each with their separate folders, but rather just a folder called DC Area). I can usually stop at that level of detail for email, simply dragging any mails from the girl into the appropriate folder (it's easy enough to group all the ones from a single person together if I'm looking for all mails from a particular girl). I do that only with incoming mail (no need for sent mail).

However once they become a true POT (I'm planning to meet them) I start saving everything I have on them to a folder on my hard disk that is also organized by year / city but also has a folder for her particular name. I take screenshots of her profile so I can see how she represented herself at the time I met her (I.e. If she says she's slim bodied and later changes it to average or a few lbs or something after the fact, I'm going to know, and yes I do verify any changes to their profile before I meet them to compare). I save all pictures, both anything she put on the site as well as anything she might have emailed me. Any special notes on her go in there too like a link to her facebook or whatever.

That's about as far as I have to take it, because I usually don't end up with more than 20 real POTS requiring detail in any given city for a given year since my season is only one month. If I ever become a year round SD my whole methodology would change, because I would be focusing on girls that are geographically closer by (so organization by city would not be as helpful). Then again, if I weren't already in a committed relationship I would probably be doing about 70% civy dating and 30% sugar daddying, so not sure how the methodology would evolve.

Oh and I should mention, nobody uses my computer but me. I lock it when I'm away from my desk for any length of time. I don't let my GF get into my phone either, but I use Hushed for the SBs and keep it passcode protected. I have a iPhone 5S so it requires my fingerprint to get into the primary phone screen. The Hushed passcode is an extra layer of protection really and to keep the phone calls and text off my main number and onto a disposable number.

[Dolato]

Try using excel.

Something like this. I like to go in order by phone #... Add columns as needed. Pretty basic time saver.

profile.name real.name # age race city email

If you're playing the numbers game, you have to be organized. When you're handling multiple POTs and trying to set up several M&Gs then you it's nice to have a spreadsheet with all the info.

I also include a column for misc personal info such as if they're married or have kids and another column with the link to their profile.

Depending on what email service you use, Outlook and Gmail has a cloud service with spreadsheets that you can save / maintain off your computer. For those that need to be discrete.

[HollywoodGuy]

Seems like most of the girls that have been responding are pros or close to it. Most are immediately sending racy photos or quoting prices.

I was really disappointed when a 4'11" spinner 28 year old finally replied but after a few texts quoted 300 gold fish for a date and she would travel.

Last night a super hot little girl finally replied to my message. Her line was that she needed 1000 up front to meet so she could purchase nice clothes for us to go out.

I've seen the 22 year old massage therapist three times now. She is a freak. I can't determine if she is a full time pro or just on the side.

I've got several that I think are legit sbs texting me. Trying to schedule meets but they are not close.

This sd role is too much work to keep track of.

Skin.

Try using excel.

Something like this. I like to go in order by phone #... Add columns as needed. Pretty basic time saver.

profile.name real.name # age race city email


Profile name 1 barbie 111-111-2222 18 black city email address.

Profile name 2 barbie 111-111-2223 19 latina city email address.

Profile name 3 barbie 111-111-2224 20 asian city email address.

Profile name 4 barbie 111-111-2225 21 white city email address.

Profile name 5 barbie 111-111-2226 22 mixed city email address.

Profile name 6 barbie 111-111-2227 23 white city email address.

[JZLizard]

This sd role is too much work to keep track of.

It can be extremely exhausting to get good results. Thankfully it's a once a year season for me, otherwise not only would I not be able to afford the hotel / dinners and the gifts for the girls, the sheer amount of work it takes to really line up some gems, all the communication and texting would kill me. I'm not in sales, but I imagine folks who work in sales would be accustomed to dealing with x number of opportunities only to see a small percentage of those opportunities pan out, and they are probably better mentally prepared for it all than I am.

However sometimes you end up with a really good one that makes it all worth while.

They all require travel on my part though... I don't SD close to home at all. The one exception being I propositioned a super hot mixed latina / Asian stripper this past season, and spoke to her in depth about being my next SB. She said she doesn't do oral on the first date which was a turn off for me, otherwise it was headed in a direction that would have had me breaking one of my cardinal rules and banging a local regular SB, which would have almost surely come back to haunt me. Probably better that it didn't pan out.

[HollywoodGuy]

Seems like most of the girls that have been responding are pros or close to it. Most are immediately sending racy photos or quoting prices.

I was really disappointed when a 4'11" spinner 28 year old finally replied but after a few texts quoted 300 gold fish for a date and she would travel.

Last night a super hot little girl finally replied to my message. Her line was that she needed 1000 up front to meet so she could purchase nice clothes for us to go out.

I've seen the 22 year old massage therapist three times now. She is a freak. I can't determine if she is a full time pro or just on the side.

I've got several that I think are legit sbs texting me. Trying to schedule meets but they are not close.

This sd role is too much work to keep track of.

Skin.

Try making your offer before they make theirs. Its not fail safe, but does get the conversation going, or stops it dead in its tracks. Either way you are ahead. I don't like mystery. Or endless emails, txt's and messages.

[SkinJr]

Seems like most of the girls that have been responding are pros or close to it. Most are immediately sending racy photos or quoting prices.

I was really disappointed when a 4'11" spinner 28 year old finally replied but after a few texts quoted 300 gold fish for a date and she would travel.

Last night a super hot little girl finally replied to my message. Her line was that she needed 1000 up front to meet so she could purchase nice clothes for us to go out.

I've seen the 22 year old massage therapist three times now. She is a freak. I can't determine if she is a full time pro or just on the side.

I've got several that I think are legit sbs texting me. Trying to schedule meets but they are not close.

This sd role is too much work to keep track of.

Skin.