Massage Parlor Reports

**CobraCrew** · 03-08-14 12:25

Originally Posted by BottleRocket12 [View Original Post]

Asking somebody to pay 40 dollars for self service is like asking the Day Laborers at Home Depot to pay you to watch you paint your own house.

This makes me curious as to what you guys drop for self-service.

I usually do $20.

**Ron M** · 03-07-14 23:34

Originally Posted by Jadedone [View Original Post]

Of course I did. First, she was kind of a *****. And second, she was about a 5 in the looks department. And the brief history we had up to that point was her haggling for more tips every time I saw her.

I thought you didn't like AMP's anyway?

Edit: I guess I should clarify. If she had a better personality and looked somewhat better I might have went for it. There are some providers I've had that I'd definitely take out.
And I should have stated earlier that it was an AMP.

I was just Curious why you turned her down.

**Jadedone** · 03-07-14 21:52

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

And you said No? Seriously?

Of course I did. First, she was kind of a *****. And second, she was about a 5 in the looks department. And the brief history we had up to that point was her haggling for more tips every time I saw her.

I thought you didn't like AMP's anyway?

Edit: I guess I should clarify. If she had a better personality and looked somewhat better I might have went for it. There are some providers I've had that I'd definitely take out.
And I should have stated earlier that it was an AMP.

**DMichaels69** · 03-07-14 20:14

I was at a Chinese place MP and she said I could do it myself. I laughed and said I don't do self serve then she laughed.

Originally Posted by Humpfree [View Original Post]

I don't even go to a self serve car wash. She must realy think she's something.

**Raoul Duke** · 03-07-14 18:59

Originally Posted by Humpfree [View Original Post]

Good to see you back. It has quit a wile, How you Been? Getting warm soon I hope.

Doing well, thanks. Hope the same for you. I'm with you on the weather, hopefully sooner than later. It's been a long winter and a bit of a dry spell when it comes to finding any hot, young spinners. Here's to better days.

**Humpfree** · 03-07-14 17:45

Originally Posted by RaoulDuke [View Original Post]

50 wouldn't buy you FS at the dive bars in Cicero in the mid 1980's. Hell, it wouldn't even buy a HE at the joints in Belevedere back in 1989. I do recall $20 bjs being available by SWs along Sheridan back around 1981, that's about it. That said, I find it hard to believe that a Chicago brothel would operate at those prices during the dates that you indicated. Moreover, where's the logic in paying more to see someone on the outside? Ron, you're an enigma.

Good to see you back. It has quit a wile, How you Been? Getting warm soon I hope.

**Humpfree** · 03-07-14 17:40

Originally Posted by HawkerHunter7 [View Original Post]

Again lame massage with this Italian girl. She puts a bikini and that's it she didn't finish the hour massage when flipped she said do it yourself but pay me 40 dollars I said no thank you it's a jack shack so avoid please her face is worst than in the picture it's full of acne like really gross.

http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...th-me/19041420

I don't even go to a self serve car wash. She must realy think she's something.

**Humpfree** · 03-07-14 17:36

Originally Posted by Tripps [View Original Post]

Great stuff. I'm almost never down that way but your story makes me want to go out of my way. It's been many years since I've seen what I'd consider "smoking" hot in a parlour. Appreciate the report!

I would bet LE is too. Happy hunting.

**Ron M** · 03-07-14 13:50

Originally Posted by FngrBngr [View Original Post]

One recently asked if I'd like to go to the movies. It was great and free. If any of you have noticed many of these girls actually live at the mp. It must suck.

FB.

That's Awesome for you. I can't go to any AMPs. I'm not into the Asian Girl thing.

**FngrBngr** · 03-07-14 13:45

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

And you said No? Seriously?

One recently asked if I'd like to go to the movies. It was great and free. If any of you have noticed many of these girls actually live at the mp. It must suck.

FB.

**Ron M** · 03-07-14 13:32

Originally Posted by Jadedone [View Original Post]

This happened to me as well. As it turns out the MP wanted to go an a real date. Eventually she asked, "When are you going to ask me out?

Ha ha. No.

And you said No? Seriously?

**Tripps** · 03-07-14 07:12

Originally Posted by Dwd1982 [View Original Post]

You're absolutely right. So I went there for a four hand. Had Ana and some other chick. It was ok but a bit underwhelming. Ana had. Amazing tits though!

Yeah. Of course after this brief discussion I started thinking about Eliza again. Set up an appointment and she was fantastic as usual. She isn't really my type in terms of looks but her level of skill is top notch.

**Tripps** · 03-07-14 07:07

Originally Posted by BigChiGuy44 [View Original Post]

So I was working out in the SW Burbs and decided that on my way home, while taking route 83, I would stop and get some McDonalds. After a few McNuggets I was encouraged by the fact that I was very close to one of the only places I have had success at every time. Truth be told, I had all but given up on the hobby altogether. Monger funds have been low, the level of stress around securing something worth while has been very high which is a bad combination and usually ends up with me being bitter for spending my hard earned $ on junk.

Anyhow, I walk into the joint and mamasan tells me that it will be about 5 minutes before I can get a provider, which was fine considering the popularity of this place. The weird part here is, she asked me to sit down on their big fake leather couch (either bright yellow or orange I think) which I have never done or even been asked to do. Generally, it's come back in 5,10,15 or however many minutes. I had been reading reports that indicate that my ATF may have been changing their tune. I sat there for about 5 minutes looking straight down at my phone while one monger came in and one left. (I didn't make any eye-contact intentionally. Sorry if it was one of you gentlemen).

Mamasan comes out and tells me we are good to go, I ask if I can use the restroom as I usually always do and walk straight back to it as a sign that I have been there before. When I come out of the restroom I am greeted by probably the hottest provider I have ever encountered. (I'm not a newbie, I've been doing this for about 7 years or so now) Anyway, this girl is smoking. Beautiful face, about 5'7 with nice bolt-ons that were probably a the. Generally I don't like tits that big on relatively smaller women, but whoever sculpted these fine things knew what he was doing.

We start off with a table shower, which was phenomenal. While also washing me down, I basically received a HE with the amount of attention she paid to lilchiguy and the boys. Dry off, spend a few minutes in the sauna, and then head back to the room. During the massage, which has always been mediocre at best, she's working hard to try to give me a good massage, which is very subjective anyhow. It then go to the part of the massage where she starts with the "magic fingers" light teasing around with her tips. This is where it got interesting, as sexy as she was, she was god awful at this. While I was still face down she asked me what I wanted, which was probably the funniest thing I have encountered. I didn't reply, and she asked me again "What would you like, baby"... To which I replied "to turnover". After she realized her mistake I turned over and we agree on FS for $.

She excuses her self to go get a wrap, comes back and gives an excellent CBJ in which she actually puts the wrap on in that fashion. She then continues with CBJ for about 5 minutes which was excellent and I actually probably could have finished there but fought it like hell to make it to FS. (The leftover McNuggets in my car made for a good topic to think about to get my mind off of blowing my load). She then hops on aboard the ChiGuy express and rides me for about a minute, then says "ok baby you on top". Generally I would like so more riding, but she was somewhat awkward so I did't mind the ability to take control. I get on top and start getting into her, and man she is really, really tight. I am not a huge guy by any account, and consider myself average but she was laboring to take it all. After taking it to her for about five minutes missionary, I finally release and feel great about it.

My real question is, regardless of the experience, do any other mongers question why we actually do this, after the fact? Compared to prior experiences I feel like I had a great time at $.7 and enjoy the spa setting, as I generally feel safer than with any BP girl. I really couldn't rationalize in my head why I do this, but I know the next time I have the time, the money, and the urge. I'll probably do the exact same thing. Maybe if I didn't have a SO I would try to start some sort of research study on human nature and our seemingly unending quest to bury our cocks in strange boxes.

Oh well, until next time. Stay safe and happy mongering.

-BigChiGuy.

Great stuff. I'm almost never down that way but your story makes me want to go out of my way. It's been many years since I've seen what I'd consider "smoking" hot in a parlour. Appreciate the report!

**Jadedone** · 03-07-14 06:36

This happened to me as well. As it turns out the MP wanted to go an a real date. Eventually she asked, "When are you going to ask me out?

Ha ha. No.

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

They probably want to see you outside of the Massage Parlor so they don't have to split their Money with the Massage Parlor.

**IdiotBoy** · 03-06-14 13:59

Originally Posted by HawkerHunter7 [View Original Post]

Again lame massage with this Italian girl. She puts a bikini and that's it she didn't finish the hour massage when flipped she said do it yourself but pay me 40 dollars I said no thank you it's a jack shack so avoid please her face is worst than in the picture it's full of acne like really gross.

http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...th-me/19041420

You can see the zits in the 2nd pic.