Massage Parlor Reports

**ChiGuy606** · 03-02-14 12:29

BigChi from 606 Chi, greetings!

Excellent review my brother. Glad to hear you got your pipes cleaned in such a memorable, stress free way! I hope the nuggets weren't too cold when you returned to your car...

Regarding why we do this. I was discussing this point with some brothers a few months back on a different forum on this board. I learned this from a potential sugar-baby who was a psychology student and knows a thing or to as to how men tick (better than we do I'll assure you).

Her explanation was 'Evolutionary Psychology'. The jist of which is as follows:

Evolutionary psychology.

The theory that most of our core behaviors of today come from what made our early ancestors successful in reproducing. We today are the product of successful 'hookups' 100's of millennia in the past right? The techniques of most successful Cave-Daddies from millennia ago banging the most beautiful Cave-babies have been carried down from the generations for the simple reason of successful Cave-Daddies = genetic transference.

So when a woman is pregnant / has a baby, she is unable to become pregnant with another man for a duration of at least 1 year. She has 9 months of pregnancy & at least a few months afterwards. It really does no good from a genetic transference standpoint for the woman to bang 100's of Cave-Daddies in a year, because she is still only going to get pregnant with one of them. After pregnancy, the most successful reproductive strategy she can take would be to get the Daddy to stick around for the duration & take care of her. That would ensure a healthy birth & rearing, and thus help spread her genes into the next generations.

For the prehistoric Cave-daddy, the most successful strategy for spreading his genes into future generations would have been to nail as many cave-babies as he possibly could, in as little time as possible, and with a slant towards the younger 20 something cave-babies if he has enough cave-game!

So there always has been this monogamy, polygamy conflict between men & women, and it has everything to do with biology. Over time, society evolved to favor the woman's preference of a single partner, because simply successful women's reproduction = a successful species. But it doesn't change the way men deep down have been pre-programmed to behave. On a biological level, it is very difficult for us to live in the monogamous sex-prison, and (most) women cannot fathom why we have such a hard time with it, because they are programmed to build the sex-prison from a biological level.

Regards,

Chi.

Originally Posted by BigChiGuy44 [View Original Post]

My real question is, regardless of the experience, do any other mongers question why we actually do this, after the fact? Compared to prior experiences I feel like I had a great time at $.7 and enjoy the spa setting, as I generally feel safer than with any BP girl. I really couldn't rationalize in my head why I do this, but I know the next time I have the time, the money, and the urge. I'll probably do the exact same thing. Maybe if I didn't have a SO I would try to start some sort of research study on human nature and our seemingly unending quest to bury our cocks in strange boxes.

Oh well, until next time. Stay safe and happy mongering.

-BigChiGuy.

**BigChiGuy44** · 03-02-14 09:17

So I was working out in the SW Burbs and decided that on my way home, while taking route 83, I would stop and get some McDonalds. After a few McNuggets I was encouraged by the fact that I was very close to one of the only places I have had success at every time. Truth be told, I had all but given up on the hobby altogether. Monger funds have been low, the level of stress around securing something worth while has been very high which is a bad combination and usually ends up with me being bitter for spending my hard earned $ on junk.

Anyhow, I walk into the joint and mamasan tells me that it will be about 5 minutes before I can get a provider, which was fine considering the popularity of this place. The weird part here is, she asked me to sit down on their big fake leather couch (either bright yellow or orange I think) which I have never done or even been asked to do. Generally, it's come back in 5,10,15 or however many minutes. I had been reading reports that indicate that my ATF may have been changing their tune. I sat there for about 5 minutes looking straight down at my phone while one monger came in and one left. (I didn't make any eye-contact intentionally. Sorry if it was one of you gentlemen).

Mamasan comes out and tells me we are good to go, I ask if I can use the restroom as I usually always do and walk straight back to it as a sign that I have been there before. When I come out of the restroom I am greeted by probably the hottest provider I have ever encountered. (I'm not a newbie, I've been doing this for about 7 years or so now) Anyway, this girl is smoking. Beautiful face, about 5'7 with nice bolt-ons that were probably a the. Generally I don't like tits that big on relatively smaller women, but whoever sculpted these fine things knew what he was doing.

We start off with a table shower, which was phenomenal. While also washing me down, I basically received a HE with the amount of attention she paid to lilchiguy and the boys. Dry off, spend a few minutes in the sauna, and then head back to the room. During the massage, which has always been mediocre at best, she's working hard to try to give me a good massage, which is very subjective anyhow. It then go to the part of the massage where she starts with the "magic fingers" light teasing around with her tips. This is where it got interesting, as sexy as she was, she was god awful at this. While I was still face down she asked me what I wanted, which was probably the funniest thing I have encountered. I didn't reply, and she asked me again "What would you like, baby"... To which I replied "to turnover". After she realized her mistake I turned over and we agree on FS for $.

She excuses her self to go get a wrap, comes back and gives an excellent CBJ in which she actually puts the wrap on in that fashion. She then continues with CBJ for about 5 minutes which was excellent and I actually probably could have finished there but fought it like hell to make it to FS. (The leftover McNuggets in my car made for a good topic to think about to get my mind off of blowing my load). She then hops on aboard the ChiGuy express and rides me for about a minute, then says "ok baby you on top". Generally I would like so more riding, but she was somewhat awkward so I did't mind the ability to take control. I get on top and start getting into her, and man she is really, really tight. I am not a huge guy by any account, and consider myself average but she was laboring to take it all. After taking it to her for about five minutes missionary, I finally release and feel great about it.

My real question is, regardless of the experience, do any other mongers question why we actually do this, after the fact? Compared to prior experiences I feel like I had a great time at $.7 and enjoy the spa setting, as I generally feel safer than with any BP girl. I really couldn't rationalize in my head why I do this, but I know the next time I have the time, the money, and the urge. I'll probably do the exact same thing. Maybe if I didn't have a SO I would try to start some sort of research study on human nature and our seemingly unending quest to bury our cocks in strange boxes.

Oh well, until next time. Stay safe and happy mongering.

-BigChiGuy.

**Dwd1982** · 03-02-14 08:05

Originally Posted by Tripps [View Original Post]

Eliza is a long time favorite of mine.

I don't recommend four hand, its just not my thing. I like one on one as I feel it builds a better relationship more quickly.

You're absolutely right. So I went there for a four hand. Had Ana and some other chick. It was ok but a bit underwhelming. Ana had. Amazing tits though!

**ChezBone** · 03-02-14 07:42

Was driving on Archer and stopped by Comfort Spa yesterday. Typical asian MP. Would rate their looks as a 4 or 5 but 8 or 9 on attitude. Massage was very good, deep tissue. Finish was CBJ. The whole experience was quite nice, just what I needed after a long week. Going to go back to see if I got lucky or if the second time is better. As always, YMMV.

**HawkerHunter7** · 03-02-14 00:34

Originally Posted by ShyHockeyPlayer [View Original Post]

Enough said.

Should have read it, you are right but again I have a thing for blondes.

**Angai** · 03-01-14 20:16

Originally Posted by Magooski [View Original Post]

I do believe in giving a masseuse a fair tip for a very good massage, typically 20% and a bit more if she makes it more interesting. Then it can also go very low for a Lame massage or bad attitude. Typically a hr tip is 40 and up. FB knows how to share his appreciation. So 90 out the door ain't that bad if the service merits it. Maybe the next visit will be better.

There should really be a standard when it comes to these things. I usually follow the 20% rule myself and I think the 20% is actually a little high and too high for a bad massage and by no means do I tip $40 without HE, because I don't usually drop 40 for the HE unless 60 is negotiated before I convert my 40 on repeats to 50 and then float around 60 if I become a usual. Just tossing out 40-60 for a good massage is like a bunch of people getting dollar table dances at something like the skybox gentlemen's club then the fool comes to the table to start making it rain sometimes the entertainer doesn't even respect the guy and I think the situation should be the same for tipping masseuse there should be like patron standard as to not create snobs for economic mongers LOL. Of course everyone's wallet carries it's own weight though and how they incentivize should be to their own budget and what they think is fail. I still will always look at the guy that makes it rain as a fool though LOL.

**Magooski** · 03-01-14 18:20

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

Well I guess 90 isn't that Bad after all. Good Massage or not these Girls Expect a Tip?

They all expect tips unless it's an owner and just a good massage. Friska in Mokena charges 70 for a great massage and does not expect a tip. Many spas, Latina, Black, Asian, the girls often just earn from tips. That is why I really enjoy leaving a 3 or 5 buck tip for bad service. It's more insulting than stiffing them! Interesting enough, I've not had much success with white providers. I guess it's all a matter of opinion.

**Blue Screen** · 03-01-14 14:45

Potentially dumb question here...

There have been a number of times when an AMP provider has given me the parlor's business card with her name on it. Presumably so I'll remember her name and request her next time. But there have been a few times when they've written their personal number on it. I assume this is to make an appointment to meet them outside of work, maybe back at their apartment? I've never called. Should I try it? Can this turn out badly? Dose it usually cost more / less money?

**Ron M** · 03-01-14 10:47

Originally Posted by Magooski [View Original Post]

I do believe in giving a masseuse a fair tip for a very good massage, typically 20% and a bit more if she makes it more interesting. Then it can also go very low for a Lame massage or bad attitude. Typically a hr tip is 40 and up. FB knows how to share his appreciation. So 90 out the door ain't that bad if the service merits it. Maybe the next visit will be better.

Well I guess 90 isn't that Bad after all. Good Massage or not these Girls Expect a Tip?

**Magooski** · 03-01-14 09:08

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

90 and no H.E. Really? Seems like a lot of Money for just a Massage with no H.E.

I do believe in giving a masseuse a fair tip for a very good massage, typically 20% and a bit more if she makes it more interesting. Then it can also go very low for a Lame massage or bad attitude. Typically a hr tip is 40 and up. FB knows how to share his appreciation. So 90 out the door ain't that bad if the service merits it. Maybe the next visit will be better.

**Cubsfan12** · 03-01-14 06:29

Originally Posted by MikeHuntSweat [View Original Post]

Ron, congrats on your 600 helpful posts. Celebrate with your regular.

That's hilarious. The guy has 600 more posts than I do, yet I have more actual reviews. Amazing.

**MikeHuntSweat** · 02-28-14 23:21

Ron, congrats on your 600 helpful posts. Celebrate with your regular.

**ShyHockeyPlayer** · 02-28-14 21:16

Originally Posted by HawkerHunter7 [View Original Post]

She is a total waste of money and the massage is horrible and then nothing just oil all over you. The worst is that she has the worst attitude.

http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...ssage/17341851

http://chicago.backpage.com/Therapeu...riday/18338596

Also her place smells to humidity.

Enough said.

**Ron M** · 02-28-14 20:23

Originally Posted by Vazooli [View Original Post]

Ron,

It sounds more like you have a deep-seated prejudice against Eastern Asian people, at least the women. Something in your past perhaps?

-Vazooli.

I just don't have a Fetish for Asian Women.

**Vazooli** · 02-28-14 17:52

Originally Posted by RonM [View Original Post]

Reading this Forum is enough for me not to go to any AMPs. You'd be surprised on what you can learn from reading about others Mistakes. Why would I want to make the same Mistakes that the guys here are making by going to an AMP? 40 year old Asian Ladies charging prices as if they were 20 something Hotties. Yeah I'm so there. Not. Kind of Defeats the idea of Learning, eh? Besides I don't have an Asian Girl Fetish.

Ron,

It sounds more like you have a deep-seated prejudice against Eastern Asian people, at least the women. Something in your past perhaps?

-Vazooli.