Massage Parlor Reports

[TopGun9181]

I agree I been in the AMP scene of orlando since 2003 my self and I got so lucky with some girls and nothing from other girls that I heard offer a menu depends on how the girl see you like JAG said first impression is always the best. Then again I been to AMPs where I'm in flip flops a jersey and shorts and still get top A service...There times I get FS or BBBJ from a lady more then once and then suddenly she tries to act all legit after the 10th time. I even taken one or two out for dinner back in 06-08 ...The main thing is be CLEAN and RESPECTFUL!!

To me you just spew a continuous flow of horseshit. Though it might be entertaining, it lacks any value from a mongering perspective. To elaborate: You drive a rental car to what seems to be a visit a day to just about every body rub chick / lmt that exists in orlando. And you know all their life stories, prior names, prior locations, cars they drive, guys they date, reasons they moved / came back to town, etc. And you are dropping major 'coinage' all over town to get the extra service only a monger who exhibits the lessons learned you write of below. And somehow we have all found ourselves so fortunate you joined our forum. I call bullshit to you and your multiple handles, which by the way you use oh so obviously to respond to your own posts in an attempt to validate your existence. I'm amazed that some actually fall for this. Seems like fantasyland bullshit to me.

And BTW, I've seen a few of the girls you claim for your extra coinage you get to do "x", "y" and "z" to them. And again I call bullshit. I've seen them multiple times and never was I ever given the chance to drop a this extra coinage that in turn allowed me to get full service / drop my load all over their bodies as you claim nor was I given the impression said menu existed. But maybe I just never prayed to the bible you authored / blessed us with in the below post.

[NoDice]

I must say I was not impressed with my dream. First they look nothing like the pics and the place did not smell nice (if you know what I mean).

I walked out wanting to see another friend but I ran out of time. I would not recommend to anyone.

Happy Hunting ya'll.

http://orlando.backpage.com/BodyRubs...030-24/9694924

[Quasimodo45]

Does anyone have any info on Tanya in Waterford Lakes?

http://www.usasexguide.info/forum/se...e=vBForum_Post

[Greens]

Do not read JaguarXF's posts while eating.

Thanks, now I have to clean my screen!! Happy Holidays Ladies and Gents.

[LeoTheLyin]

New to the site, but I travel a lot. This place has helped me a great deal.

I've had some dreams in Orlando.

http://www.rubmaps.com/erotic-massag...lando-fl-15035

Asian Massage and Spa. Opted for the deal in their CL ad, $80 hour with table shower. Two mamasans working, one looked younger but both were over 40. Younger looking one took me back and I decided to start with the table shower as I didn't have a chance to freshen up beforehand. She did a good job, paying close attention (but not too much) to specific areas, indicating more was on the table. Went to the massage, which was a pretty good legit rub. On flip, soft touch entire body with some grazing. I used my hips and moans to play the 'your getting warmer / colder' game and it worked. She removed the towel and started to lightly work the area and then said, 'oil? Yes please. Worked it like a champ and upon completion, finished the rest of the hour with more massage. .8 to the door, .2 for a tip. Definitely worth a repeat.

Natural Therapies.

Stumbled upon this place a long time ago, not sure if things have changed. Mamasan looked decent, but hardly spoke english. Hot little chick in the other room translated. Immediately when I walked in, she started asking if I had cash and called me 'baby'. Went to the room and she proceeded to tell me how cute I was and started with a terrible massage. I roamed freely and she opened her top to reveal some saggy hangers. She lifted her skirt and offered me a touch, but I wasn't interested. She was getting less attractive the more I saw. She worked it ok and on finish she started trying to get me to give her 1.5 for the show and HE. BS. She was persistant and I finally caved, giving her .6. So .4 for the door, .6 for tip. No way I will repeat.

[Otownstamina]

You either are ugly, smelly, fat, hairy, poor or just don't know how to run game. I have been hobbying orlando since 2003 and can vouch for just about everyone of his posts. And yes, you can get way further than you think with a lot of the girls. They don't behave the same with everyone. There are a select few they are comfortable with and once they know you and know you will be generous the sky is the limit. Shit I have had girls give me their cell phone number before for private action at my place and that is NO HORSESHIT. Don't be bitter if you can't play the game and win. Hate the game, not the players.

Amen to that... I have also found myself in situations where a limit was unheard of and a cell number was provided. It's all on how you present yourself and continue to present yourself.

[Wildbill2]

To me you just spew a continuous flow of horseshit. Though it might be entertaining, it lacks any value from a mongering perspective. To elaborate: You drive a rental car to what seems to be a visit a day to just about every body rub chick / lmt that exists in orlando. And you know all their life stories, prior names, prior locations, cars they drive, guys they date, reasons they moved / came back to town, etc. And you are dropping major 'coinage' all over town to get the extra service only a monger who exhibits the lessons learned you write of below. And somehow we have all found ourselves so fortunate you joined our forum. I call bullshit to you and your multiple handles, which by the way you use oh so obviously to respond to your own posts in an attempt to validate your existence. I'm amazed that some actually fall for this. Seems like fantasyland bullshit to me.

And BTW, I've seen a few of the girls you claim for your extra coinage you get to do "x", "y" and "z" to them. And again I call bullshit. I've seen them multiple times and never was I ever given the chance to drop a this extra coinage that in turn allowed me to get full service / drop my load all over their bodies as you claim nor was I given the impression said menu existed. But maybe I just never prayed to the bible you authored / blessed us with in the below post.

You either are ugly, smelly, fat, hairy, poor or just don't know how to run game. I have been hobbying orlando since 2003 and can vouch for just about everyone of his posts. And yes, you can get way further than you think with a lot of the girls. They don't behave the same with everyone. There are a select few they are comfortable with and once they know you and know you will be generous the sky is the limit. Shit I have had girls give me their cell phone number before for private action at my place and that is NO HORSESHIT. Don't be bitter if you can't play the game and win. Hate the game, not the players.

[Sex Xes]

Dreamed about Zen massage in Winter Garden the other day. Heard they had a new masseuse so I thought I would give it a try.

Total waste of time. New lady by the name of Grace, negotiated nude massage with HE. She offered more, but I didn't have my Jaguar bankroll with me so I settled for the standard offering. Her idea of nude didn't match my idea of nude. If clothing is still on the body in anyway, you ain't nude. A lot of no touch zones due to her being ticklish, so she claimed. Couldn't touch the nips because she just doesn't like that.

Asked her to use as little oil as possible. 2 days later I'm still trying to get that crap off of me. Thank god for pressure washers.

As for the actual massage. It also sucked.

Put on my button-down shirt and khakis, got into my rental car and drove off into the sunset.

Total damage. 130 jag coins.

[EndGame]

To me you just spew a continuous flow of horseshit. Though it might be entertaining, it lacks any value from a mongering perspective. To elaborate: You drive a rental car to what seems to be a visit a day to just about every body rub chick / lmt that exists in orlando. And you know all their life stories, prior names, prior locations, cars they drive, guys they date, reasons they moved / came back to town, etc. And you are dropping major 'coinage' all over town to get the extra service only a monger who exhibits the lessons learned you write of below. And somehow we have all found ourselves so fortunate you joined our forum. I call bullshit to you and your multiple handles, which by the way you use oh so obviously to respond to your own posts in an attempt to validate your existence. I'm amazed that some actually fall for this. Seems like fantasyland bullshit to me.

And BTW, I've seen a few of the girls you claim for your extra coinage you get to do "x", "y" and "z" to them. And again I call bullshit. I've seen them multiple times and never was I ever given the chance to drop a this extra coinage that in turn allowed me to get full service / drop my load all over their bodies as you claim nor was I given the impression said menu existed. But maybe I just never prayed to the bible you authored / blessed us with in the below post.

With the number of reviews Jag provides, there's plenty of room to take issue with some. He gave me a UTR contact and the info was dead on. Just one opinion but I appreciate the reviews even if I need a snow-shovel to get through them all.

[NinerMan8]

Does anyone have any info on Tanya in Waterford Lakes?

[Exec Talent]

Do not read JaguarXF's posts while eating.

[AncientOne]

I have received many PM's from mongers asking me for my "secret" to success with providers. The Mario coin notwithstanding, there is no "secret". Instead of answering, individually, the dozens of PM's I've received regarding this subject, I thought it would be incumbent upon me to simply post this letter to the Board / Massage / Rub forum, in an attempt to assist my brothers in their eternal search for soft, feminine, succulent "quiff". I can't speak for SW's as I never see them, or Escorts, as I don't see escorts either. This business model / marketing strategy applies mainly to cats that see LMT's and Rub chicks. Of course, you older, experienced hobbyists, already know what I am about to say. So you guys need not read any further than this sentence.

You younger and less experienced cats, listen up: I honestly cannot tell you how many providers have told me how they were "sickened" by guys whose "manscaping" skills were, shall we say, less than exemplary. NOTHING turns a provider off more than a guy with body odor. NOTHING. I have heard stories from providers about guys that, have "ass sweat", "nut sweat", "toilet paper" in their ass crack (yes, USED toilet paper! Dingleberry's, dingleberry's, dingleberry's all the way" (Oh, what fun it is to ride, oh never mind. I'm just in the Christmas spirit! In their ass hair, "body sweat", "disgusting nose hair", "ear hair" and the list goes on. Now, the Jag is sensitive to other cultures and their "manscaping" rules and I would never want to offend a fellow hobbyist who is from another country / foreign nationals / culturally different. But here in North America, in order to get pussy / BBBJ / CBJ from a "quality" provider, you better make sure you fucking "MANSCAPE". I promise you, a quality provider will shut you out, (like Sandy Koufax, circa 1963), if you are not exceptionally well groomed. I have heard from dozens of providers who tell me stories of clients, even good looking ones, that have despicable hygiene. The provider cannot get them out of the room quickly enough, coinage notwithstanding. You can look like Rock Hudson, Clint Walker, Tom Selleck, or, Tom Cruise. But if you don't shower / bath properly BEFORE you see a provider, don't expect any extras. But, some guys are just too fucking stupid to realize that hygiene is absolutely critical to their success rate. It does not matter if the chick is a "civilian", or, a Rub gal. Hygiene goes a long way in determining your success rate. Similarly, if a provider has a "hygiene" issue, I wouldn't expect a hobbyist to want to get close to her. And believe me; I have seen a few providers who have hygiene issues. I summarily refuse to see them again.

Think about it: You begin to finger blast a chick during foreplay, and out comes a "cheesy" substance, or, you detect an aroma better suited for the Hong Kong fish market. I don't know about you cats, but the Jag is "exiting stage left" at that point. True, that may be a bit of an overreaching example, if you will, but you cats get my drift, (or, is it a "whiff of quiff" So, as we move forward in our never ending quest for "quiff", please remember: 1. Shower thoroughly and completely prior to your appointment. That especially includes you "hairy" cats out there. Pay careful attention to your "crack" and "sac" areas. (You blue collar cats, I realize it is more difficult for you if you are seeing a provider on your lunch break, or, immediately after work before you go home to the Mrs. But, at least do the best you can, ok? Do NOT spray cologne over your body odor. It will only make it worse. You are better off stopping at a 7-11 and washing your man parts in the bathroom. Bring a change of underwear if possible and hide it in your lunch box. If the Mrs. Packs your lunch for you, hide your "monger" skivvies in your tool kit or utility belt).2. Avoid wearing: Sweats, ball caps, flip flops, dirty and smelly sneakers, tank tops, old tee shirts, etc. For those gents that can, try to wear a decent button down dress shirt, kakis', dress socks and business casual shoes. Remember, the providers are "sizing you up" the minute you walk through the door. You never get a second chance to make a good first impression, as they say. You don't have to walk in wearing a "Brioni', or, "Zegna" suit in order to get laid. Just dress nicely and look neat and clean. 3. Wear "lightly" scented cologne. You want the provider to "gag" on your cock, not on the scent of your cologne. 4. Cats with facial hair: Be neatly trimmed and free of food, toilet paper, mucosal droppings, etc. Inspect your facial hair carefully PRIOR to entering the studio / rub joint. 5. Walk into the studio with confidence, not arrogance. Don't look like you're a fucking tourist, lost, or, a newbie. And ALWAYS be a gentleman to the ladies. All women love a real gentleman and being a true gentleman is a real turn on for them. Never, ever grab or grope a gal. NEVER. They fucking hate it when a guy does that. Always ask permission before you touch a provider, otherwise they may ask you to leave. The Jag has even sent / brought flowers to a studio before. That's right mother fuckers; the Jag is a romanticist at heart. (I may have just blown my cover at a few places, but, oh well).

Gents, feel free to add anything, as this is just a general guide to assist you in your hobbying efforts. These tenets on hygiene have enabled me to achieve a remarkable "closing percentage", worthy of Mariano Rivera and Michael Jordan, during my 11 years of hobbying.

I wish you all great success.

Merry Christmas, fellas.

I'm out.

JaguarXF.

Not sure that using Sandy Koufax and body rub mongering in the same sentence is a good thing. Doubt very highly that Koufax ever partook, LOL. But we get your point about hygiene and it happens to be excellent advice. Flowers are quite over the top but certainly guys need, at a minimum, NOT to be total retards. I fully understand from my years of mongering, what a bunch of sorry motherf*ckers these ladies get to deal with on a daily basis. If you stand out as NOT one of those guys, Your Mileage WILL Vary!

[Richrich]

[Deleted by Admin]

EDITOR'S NOTE: This report was redacted or deleted to remove sections of the report that were largely argumentative. Please read the Forum FAQ and the Forum's Posting Guidelines for more information. Thank You!

[Steve Pope]

Jag you left out the rule that you have to drive a rental car.

If I had your coinage I could whistle Dixie out my ass while dining at the Y and still get a great massage.

Of course, as always, YMMV.

Peace brothers & sistas.

Just don't forget to install the Vanity plate on the rental car!

SP.

[SpikeFL]

I have fully agree with JaguarXF on all basis and the only thing I have to add is that the AMP offers a tableshower take advantage of it. You will get a lot farther if the provider can scrub you clean.

OJ.

Amen to the advice!