Thread: "Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?
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09-08-13 14:15 #4474
Peace of mind
Did that almost 20 years ago now. Best move I ever made.
Originally Posted by Revvo
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Didn't go the stealth route, though; my wife knew and approved. We were done having kids, and she didn't want to do the tubal. I wasn't as squeamish. (:
It was one of the deciding factors of my girl letting us go raw. She is apparently allergic to most birth control, so when she found out I was snipped, she immediately asked if we could get tested and go bare.
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09-08-13 14:05 #4473
Loans to friends and SB's
My advice is to you is simple. Don't lend money to anyone that you aren't prepared to lose. If she's your ATF and can afford it, give it to her. One thing that you will get for your money is the knowledge that she is indeed your ATF. If she never pays you back then you will know that somewhere down the line this issue was going to rear it's head and it may have cost you more money.
Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-08-13 09:56 #4472Follow your gut instinct. The first "real" SB I had needed an advance, which I gave her and she followed through on making sure I was paid back. But I felt she was trustworthy enough to make up for the loan with our dates. But even the ones you think are trustworthy could still burn you. So just follow your instincts and do what you think is in your best interest, not in her best interest. Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-08-13 05:40 #4471
Quandary
I have thought about saying ok but don't make it a habit. Or saying you are going to make a lot of money in the future. Or should I just say nothing? Originally Posted by Golfcart
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09-08-13 02:04 #4470You don't want to just give it to her and regret it later because she may ignore your calls when you are ready to schedule with her. You don't want to completely ignore her, especially if you like her. Find out the amount first, there is nothing wrong with telling her you don't have it at the moment. There is no harm to the relationship with that response. The ball will be on her court as to her next move. She may give it a few days and try asking again but always know that she will need you before you need her. Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-07-13 23:43 #4469So, one of my very first babies came to me with similar request. The money was for a medical issue that had come up, and I had reason to believe she was telling the truth. It wasn't a huge amount and she told me she would consider it an advance on our next meeting. I gave it to her, and when I did I didn't expect to see a return on it. I had enjoyed my time with her, I believed she needed it, and I was ok with the idea that it was a gift, as HG said. Originally Posted by Revvo
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I kept in touch with her via text, and the medical issue was serious, so we didn't schedule another time together. A while later, I got another request from her, for another loan / gift, a larger amount this time. I said no. I've not heard from her since. I don't regret saying yes the first time, and I don't regret saying no the second.
Have had a couple of other SB's ask for advances for whatever reason, where I didn't feel that we had established the level of rapport where I wanted to be the banker, and I had no qualms saying no. I guess what I think it boils down to is the relationship you have. It's okay to help someone out-I know that the girls need it sometimes; but when you fell like you're being taken advantage of, don't hesitate to say no and if that spells the end, so be it.
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09-07-13 22:24 #4468
Pop Quiz What Would You Do
My answer will not be popular. Asking for a loan or extra gift is a game-changer that sent the relationship into the toilet the minute the request was made regardless what Revvo does. If he loans or gives her the money she'll keep having emergencies and resentment will set in on his part. If he doesn't loan or give her the money resentment will set in on her part. There are some game-enders in pay for play and this is one of the boundaries. It's only a matter of time that more requests get made. The same thing would happen if the two of them were golfing buddies. In pay for play it happens faster and if she knows something, if she has put two and two together, it's worse in pay for play. Originally Posted by Revvo
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So what would I do? Not respond to further calls or emails and find a new go-to-girl. Any response would be drama to her. You can't make a woman understand what she doesn't want to hear.
This is not a good answer but it is the least bad answer.
My point exactly. He can't keep considering it a blessing because her requests will keep on coming. Originally Posted by HollywoodGuy
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09-07-13 20:40 #4467Consider any money you give as a gift. If it comes back, consider that a blessing. Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-07-13 20:02 #4466
On Another note, I am babyless right now. I actually heard back from my tilted kilt baby and we saw each other a couple times, but unfortunately she is moving to Germany for nursing school. It was fun playing with a tilted kilt baby in her work outfit, but alas back to the drawing board for me. I was seeing her for $120 per visit. I'm having trouble finding someone new. Way too much GPS out there and they're not even wanting to spoil back.
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09-07-13 20:00 #4465
It would depend on how much for me. If it was the regular per visit price, I would just schedule a quick visit and give it to her. I made the mistake of loaning a sb money before. I was just $200 2 years ago for a car payment. She paid me back half and I've never seen her or the other $100 after that.
Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-07-13 19:53 #4464Even if you do give her the money, the relationship is "damaged". It changes the nature of the relationship to one being primarily about money. I would not do either 2 or 4. No point in kidding yourselves it's a loan. I've done #5 before even though it was against my better judgement. My baby lost her job and couldn't pay her rent. I justified it to myself that I had not been giving her that much all along. You know what happened next. She doubled down and asked me for even more. I had to say no and that did not go over well. The thing is, even when you try to help you aren't really helping, you are enabling. Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-07-13 19:02 #4463Me too. I've been reluctant because I'm scared of the knife, but the consequences of getting a girl preggo are too great. Friends who I know who have had the procedure have said there's "nothing" to it. Originally Posted by BikeRider
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09-07-13 18:19 #4462
Pop Quiz What Would You Do
Man this is a busy weekend. Usually weekends are my time off from mongering. But anyway I just got this from my current favorite baby she is SB5. Very strong contender for ATF status. She is my little girl next door and she has never given me any problems. But she is having money problems. Works two jobs one a professional job but does not pay great. And she lives in a decent place. But she did get a DUI and is dealing with the cost of that. So I get this text today. I have not responded yet. What would you do?
"Hey I hate to ask this, but have a huge favor to ask. Is there anyway I could borrow money from you? I could really use the help and don't know what else to do. I can pay you back next Monday when my paycheck comes thru"
I have a few options.
1. I could just say sorry but I can't.
2. I could say ok I will loan you the money.
3. I could not respond at all.
4. I could say ok I will make it an advance on our next visit. We are currently at 200 per visit. And I have not asked her how much she needs.
5. I could just give her the money.
I am concerned about a few things. She could take the advance or loan and just bolt with it. Forcing me to swallow that and being treated like a chump. Or even forcing me to walk away. If I did give her the money it could be a show of goodwill and helping someone who I like. If I refuse or ignore the request it may damage our relationship which I am concerned about because I do like her a lot.
What you you do.
Revvo
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09-07-13 18:16 #4461Best move I ever made. Did it 4 years ago due to multiple scares and morning after pill episodes. Wish I had done it years before. My dr told me he had one failure in 1700 procedures. So pretty much fail safe. Originally Posted by Revvo
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09-07-13 17:36 #4460
POTs updates and a HYM
Decided to meet up with my 29yr Sicilian prego HYM again before she pops in another 2 weeks. I haven't seen her in about two months due to my wasted time chasing 18/19 yr old HCBs and had to decline a few of her requests to meet.
She's always a pleasure to be with. A very sexual woman that's up for anything I throw at her. We spent a little over an hour together during my lunch break. To make it short, I made two deposits, one on her face and another in her womb.
BTW, my other HYM disappeared after a few meetings. She completely went off the radar. She seemed to have abandon her SD account (haven't log in for months). My txts and emails to her went silence. I guess the sugar world was not for her.
Over the past 2-3 months, I have spent lots of times texting and chasing those young tails, but to no avail. Also during this time, I've met up with a few young AA girls that didn't quite meet my SB qualifications and never saw them again. I am only providing a few details on the HCBs that I thought was worth my time chasing.
18AAHCB. This girl was an extremely fun and pleasant person to talk to. Smart, nicely fit and toned body. Very sweet face. She has a black belt and teaches karate to kids. No sign of ever being in the bowl. If I was single, I would seriously make her my gf, maybe marry her. LOL Anyway she lives about 3 hours away but coming to a town near me for college (about 45min away). We txts for over a month, and also make plans for her to take the Greyhound to come see me. Once she's in town and college started, she became very busy with her school work, and other college activities. I did have a feeling that this wasn't going to work out since I was not able to to have time to come see her (married with kids) , and asking her to take the bus back and forth on a regular basis was asking too much of her, considering her school work. But nevertheless, I continue to chat with her because it was really fun times. Finally, she sent me a long txt apologizing and saying she won't be able to make our arrangement work and she would like to focus on her course work and scholarship. I wasn't suprised and sort of expected it. I wish her well with school and just left it at that. We're still connected on fb, so I could she what's she up to. Yeah, I feel kinda like a stalker.
18WhiteHCBSpinner. This girl def fits into the spinner type that HW oftens talk about. 5'1, white smooth skin, long blonde hair, nice cute little butt and what looks like nice B cups. She's very slim, probably no more than 95lbs on her. This was another fun one to talk with. Smart, playful, and a down to earth kind of girl. We txts for over a month, and I still txt her today. She looks like someone with very desparate needs and I didn't try to delve into it too much. We talked about arrangements and my expectations, but then she told me that what I offer won't work for her and she told me she has offers that are way more that meet her needs ($1. 2k a month). I sense a nando in her, but if I had that budget, I would give her a try. She looks too good and at least, really fun to chat with. Maybe I'll come back to her later, especially if none of those higher offers come through.
Currently, I am working on a few POTs and I am becoming more picky with the POTs after my meetings with a few AA that didn't quite work out and never repeated. But at least I got the POF cheaply.
19PuortoRican. You know that young latina working down the street with short short jeans and tight tops? Yeah, that's her. I love those Latin chics, and whenever I see them working around the mall or the parks I just I could get their POF. LOL.
This one has been on the site for a few months and have met nothing by weirdos. I hear that a lot from many of these girls, I believe you guys probably hear the same thing too. This girl lives about 30min away and more than willing to take the Greyhound to come to me. She's ok with my initiall offer of 5-6$ a month. She does work, so getting a date / time set up could be tricky. Working on logistics now and see what will happens.
21ModelPot. White. 5'5 long hair, lean and fit body. She does amateur modelling on the side. She just hit the site, so she's a prime target. From chatting with her, I could sense her wants could be a little more than what I can offer, but so far she's ok with my usual 5-6$ a month. She like a bottle of 'sweet red or dry white' when we get together at the FC. LOL. I'll try to hit her up next week and see if an FC date and actually take place.
Well gents, have a wonderful weekend and may god bless you all with some world class cookies to enjoy.
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