"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[FredMoore]

I got teased off of a CL ad to "signup" for this. I haven't paid yet, just have a profile. Anyone have success with this?

[JZLizard]

Since it seems there is some agreement that there is a lot of value in a dedicated SD / SB forum, any thoughts on how best to request a SD section under "special interests" rather than states and cities, and collectively begin moving discussions into more organized discussions by topic that would be easier to follow (and easier to re-locate and reference old posts on a particular topic later)? I know there is an amateur section there now, but in my mind SD / SB is really its own genre or genre of sexual pursuit.

The more I think about the benefits of this rather than one massive sequential thread under the Richmond VA forum, the more it strikes me as a much-needed action.

[DirtyDeeds38]

Fantastic update. We're all envious. Well done brother.

I've seen a lot of sugar babies and have had a variety of experiences, but the one thing I actually haven't done yet surprisingly is an overnighter. I've had long dates that lasted into the early morning hours, but I've never experienced wake-up sex with a SB. I tried setting up an overnighter twice last year, but both failed. The first time the girl just completely flaked literally at the last second and never showed up to the hotel, so I had the pleasure of spending the overnight by myself. It was a girl I had already seen but never saw or heard from her again. The other time, I actually decided to cut the date short because I just wasn't vibing at all with the girl and it just would've been painful. I haven't attempted to do overnights since because it's very difficult for me to plausibly stay away from home like that with me being married and rarely going on business trips. I might attempt an overnight this summer with one of my CL girls, but it really takes a lot of careful planning on my part and honestly it's pretty stressful. I think I need to do more legit travels away from home, then it might be easier and less stressful trying to do overnights. But the idea of waking up next to a young hottie who's eager to suck and fuck me for breakfast is the stuff of dreams. I hope to be able to check that off my bucket list at some point.

In my last post,in response to your great information on avoiding the addictive aspects to this, you can see where I had a four year affair where neither my mistress, nor my wife (at that time) knew of the other and we resided 6 miles apart. I developed some incredible cover skills.

So in response to the overnight issue, I spent a long period of time incorporating into my business (I ran my own business) a new "branch" of products and customers. This new branch inevitably had to lead me from home on regular routine trips. I built this up over a period of time and then eased into it so as not to setoff the alarms of the SO. I also, over time, brainwashed (for lack of a better term) my mistress into accepting that I took many later evening business calls and conditioned her to allowing me to step outside to take and make such calls. Over time, both women became conditioned and accepting of these scenarios and did not view them as abnormal procedure for me. It's always the abnormal behavior that sets off a woman's suspicions. This allowed me to go on regular "business" trips and when with my mistress, I was able to phone home to reassure the SO that all was normal and I was tired and going to bed for the night, etc, etc, etc. With my mistress, there were vacations, camping trips, hotel stays, staying at her apartment for days at a time. All going unsuspected by the SO. I fed the SO misinformation and left things about the home accidentally that looked suspicious, but when she checked them out, they were legit. This reinforced her belief that I was not up to something. I would intentionally send both misinformation, dead end leads, I had a checklist for checking accounts, making sure no receipts were left around, nothing left in my bag, nothing in my car, had a disposable phone I hid and locked away, knew each person's schedule. This list goes on and on and on. My point is this was with a fulltime mistress, with SB dating, you really only need cover an individual track after a date or two. Develop a full proof plan, one with spontaneous and believable excuses readily available should there be a slip. To reinforce her, leave her something that "looks" suspicious, but then when she checks it out, is totally innocent. This will quickly and affectively damper her prying into what you are doing.

If all that sounds terrible and awful, well, looking back, it probably was. LOL, however, this was a woman who denied me sex 90% of time through my 20's and 30's. And to those who say, "just leave her" well, there was a lifetime of hard work and assets that I alone built and family to consider. Easier said than done. At about 40 I finally became a man, had enough and went and started getting all the sex I could handle. I was a bit bitter from the years of infrequent and poor sex. Within a year, I had some of the best sex of my life with several women and at that point there was no looking back. Fuck loyalty and commitment, I did it for 18 years and never got anything but grief and slapped down for it. No more, I was off and running.

I am new to this entire SB thing, but like anything in my life that grabs my attention like this hobby has so far, I plan to master this. And I plan to adhere to Hollywood's plan so I can sustain myself long-term. I realize I am paying more for the time being. But I will cut back soon on the payment amount and use my skills to get more women, the keep the volume I desire. I cannot sustain $500-700 evenings for long and am aware of this fact already.

[John G Smith]

All true. All true. I started in the bowl with some funds but as the recession wore on the funds shrank dramatically. Just as I was learning the game, panic set in that I was not going to be able to continue due to my shrinking paycheck. Thats when I started doing the $ dates. More out of necessity than anything else.

Same here with the CL posts. I had to cut back late last year, so last winter out of necessity I started focusing more on CL posts. CL has a much lower volume of legit pots than the SD sites, so I figured it would be a good way to downshift my sugar activities. And with it being free, it didn't cost me anything to do a variety of experiments just for fun. My downsizing ended up working out for me because I've landed several quality SBs with modest financial needs and I also now have a very cute petite blond assistant. I started thinking out of the box when I probably wouldn't have otherwise.

So sometimes downshifting even has hidden benefits for your sugar activities, not just your finances. Both Hollywood and I have found benefits when slowing down a bit. The key thing though is to downshift before you crash the car. If I just sped through the end of last year, I would have had nothing at all, not even for CL. So I'll say it again, slowing down keeps you in the game longer.

[John G Smith]

With a wonderful night, I still think I am opting for the younger girls. Something about their inexperience and feeling like a mentor that is just too appealing to me to give that aspect up. So as amazing as this woman was, I'm going back to the younger girls. But it was a very nice change of pace with a woman who was a fucking WOMAN in every sense of the word.

Fantastic update. We're all envious. Well done brother.

I've seen a lot of sugar babies and have had a variety of experiences, but the one thing I actually haven't done yet surprisingly is an overnighter. I've had long dates that lasted into the early morning hours, but I've never experienced wake-up sex with a SB. I tried setting up an overnighter twice last year, but both failed. The first time the girl just completely flaked literally at the last second and never showed up to the hotel, so I had the pleasure of spending the overnight by myself. It was a girl I had already seen but never saw or heard from her again. The other time, I actually decided to cut the date short because I just wasn't vibing at all with the girl and it just would've been painful. I haven't attempted to do overnights since because it's very difficult for me to plausibly stay away from home like that with me being married and rarely going on business trips. I might attempt an overnight this summer with one of my CL girls, but it really takes a lot of careful planning on my part and honestly it's pretty stressful. I think I need to do more legit travels away from home, then it might be easier and less stressful trying to do overnights. But the idea of waking up next to a young hottie who's eager to suck and fuck me for breakfast is the stuff of dreams. I hope to be able to check that off my bucket list at some point.

[John G Smith]

Speaking of which, what happened to Revvo. You out there dude? Was there a formal goodbye?

I was wondering the same thing. And about Scott.

Yes this thread is huge now gong back a couple of years. But a lot of the same information cycles every 6 months. If you read about 6-8 months of posts of any period in this thread, you'll pretty much be up to speed.

[HollywoodGuy]

Man, I have nothing but respect for anyone who has the patience to do this, at 6300+ posts (some of which aren't brief). I tried once and I might have been able to do it over the course of a few nights if the server was cooperating, but loading the pages can be very slow at times, which just made it painful. The fact that the site sometimes modifies entries so that they don't read quite as smoothly as they might have originally been typed, modifying punctuation and such, can be hard on the eyes after extended periods of reading.

Another thing I found was that as I was trying to familiarize myself with who's who, a lot of the folks who posted early on are either no longer in the game or have new accounts. Maybe my problem is that I actually tried to read (and absorb) rather than just scan for highlights. But I just came to the conclusion the thread has grown too large. Even if I had read it all I wouldn't have retained and remembered everything I would have wanted to.

But yes, if anyone can do it there is lots of good info to be found. If only it weren't all lumped into one monolithic thread and were easier to sort through. Maybe the admins will consider starting a dedicated site for SD discussions, now THAT would really be useful. Not separated by city mind you (since I'm sure many of us have a working pussy-chasing radius of several hundred of miles or so), but maybe separated by different topics that relate to the SD hobby, example sub-topics being things like Cost of Entry, Addiction, etc.

Speaking of which, what happened to Revvo. You out there dude? Was there a formal goodbye?

[ThaiGringo]

This may sound like rough advice, but set aside some time over the weekend and start reading from page one.

It'll take you many many many hours, but the posts will be invaluable.

You'll learn from others' mistakes and triumphs and the general progress updates.

It will be difficult to keep track of all the golden insights, but taking the time to read through all the pages will certainly start you off better than going in blind.

You'll make expensive mistakes when starting off, but may be able to avoid some after reading of everyone else's adventures.

I think that's great advice. Thanks. I will.

[Dolato]

but maybe separated by different topics that relate to the SD hobby, example sub-topics being things like Cost of Entry, Addiction, etc.

I was thinking about that too. The bowl has led me to looking at Fitness and Performance Enhancers so those may be good sub-topics as well.

I've realized that I don't have the stamina necessary for the SBs and that's actually been a motivating factor to getting in better shape. With the escorts, I figure for my money, they can do all the work while I just enjoy the (limited / rushed) time. With the SBs, I have to put in work and do it for much longer time period, even multiple times during overnights. I get winded and need to catch my breath, so I'm working on cardio for that. I've had a few instances where I'd get a muscle cramp in my leg as I'm putting in work from behind, so I've been doing in-home yoga stretches. I recall another poster here was a yoga practioner.

And when I'm with a SB all night, I've relied on a mail order product called magic for men that was recommened on another section of this site. The product is now off the web-shelf now but I'm looking into restocking as I'm running low. There's nothing like going at it all night and some more in the morning, then getting a text later in the day telling me how she's still sore down below.

I think this may have been off topic from the addiction discussion that's been quite riveting.

And lastly, I cheated and didn't read the entire thread, but I did do couple hundred I think of this and the local LA thread on the sugar bowl.

[JZLizard]

This may sound like rough advice, but set aside some time over the weekend and start reading from page one.

Man, I have nothing but respect for anyone who has the patience to do this, at 6300+ posts (some of which aren't brief). I tried once and I might have been able to do it over the course of a few nights if the server was cooperating, but loading the pages can be very slow at times, which just made it painful. The fact that the site sometimes modifies entries so that they don't read quite as smoothly as they might have originally been typed, modifying punctuation and such, can be hard on the eyes after extended periods of reading.

Another thing I found was that as I was trying to familiarize myself with who's who, a lot of the folks who posted early on are either no longer in the game or have new accounts. Maybe my problem is that I actually tried to read (and absorb) rather than just scan for highlights. But I just came to the conclusion the thread has grown too large. Even if I had read it all I wouldn't have retained and remembered everything I would have wanted to.

But yes, if anyone can do it there is lots of good info to be found. If only it weren't all lumped into one monolithic thread and were easier to sort through. Maybe the admins will consider starting a dedicated site for SD discussions, now THAT would really be useful. Not separated by city mind you (since I'm sure many of us have a working pussy-chasing radius of several hundred of miles or so), but maybe separated by different topics that relate to the SD hobby, example sub-topics being things like Cost of Entry, Addiction, etc.

[Dolato]

I've been exploring and considering the SD / SB arrangement. What kind of budget is a minimum to play? This may be out of my league, but I sure hope not! If anyone can direct me to info, it would be much appreciated!

This may sound like rough advice, but set aside some time over the weekend and start reading from page one.

It'll take you many many many hours, but the posts will be invaluable.

You'll learn from others' mistakes and triumphs and the general progress updates.

It will be difficult to keep track of all the golden insights, but taking the time to read through all the pages will certainly start you off better than going in blind.

You'll make expensive mistakes when starting off, but may be able to avoid some after reading of everyone else's adventures.

[HollywoodGuy]

I would just also caution those new to the Sugar Bowl. It's very tempting to go overboard and try to bang every attractive girl that messages you. After all it's literally jaw-dropping initially realizing all these young women (who aren't PROs) wanting to bang an older man. But if you're not careful you can quickly exhaust all your funds and find yourself in a bad financial spot. Your Bowl career will have ended before it really got started. So just take things in moderation. After all you'll realize there is a near endless supply of young women. Yes you may miss out on a young hottie this week, but there will always be another young hottie a month from now, 6 months, or even a year later from now. You just might need to use a slightly different method or goto a new site. But the Pandora's box has been opened and the Sugar Bowl is here to stay, so remembering that might help manage your addiction and keep it under relative control.

All true. All true. I started in the bowl with some funds but as the recession wore on the funds shrank dramatically. Just as I was learning the game, panic set in that I was not going to be able to continue due to my shrinking paycheck. Thats when I started doing the $ dates. More out of necessity than anything else. I am not knocking the big spenders, but when you date 20+ days a month you have to budget, if you are on a budget, or you will be out on your ass in no time.

The down side is, its unlikely I will have a date like Brother Deeds. And would like to be able to go that route if I feel like it. The up side is I found that no girl (except some utr's) are going to hang with you for a $ unless they really like you. And they will not be overall 9,s and 10's. They got a problem in some area. Either looks or skills may be lacking. The recession did make me up my game. I always counted on the money to get what I wanted and it worked a lot of the time, but not all the time.

Now I get more of what I want for less. If the time comes that I can pay more I will. Now I could easily get a 10 for $$. And many times I do get awesome girls for the $. But this place (and time in the bowl) has helped me a lot. One final note. I admit I am not big on the chase but I realize from all the stories here it can payoff sometimes. So I have been toying with a few NP's hoping for my reward in the end. It hasn't happened yet and my game seems to get thrown if I dont feel an instant attraction that leads straight to the FC. But I am trying it out anyway.

[Dandy Don]

Not that I am surprised. Figured it was too good to be true. Not sure if she was completely BSing me or her friend really did back out. Either way, my SB is on her way here (should be arriving in the next 30 minutes). I was bitterly disappointed when I got the news and originally said maybe we should cancel tonights date. I thought maybe showing disappointment might make her even more eager to please. But I failed to turn up any other possibilities, and since my SO is out of town, figured I better take advantage so invited her down. Now, I have had a couple of drinks and I am not much of a drinker so already feeling the effects. I think tonight we are going to push boundaries.

[DirtyDeeds38]

Interesting discussion lately on addiction.

There's often considered 4-5 stages of addiction.

Stage 1: Experimentation.

Stage 2: Regular Use.

Stage 3: Risky Use.

Stage 4: Dependence.

Stage 5: Addiction.

More info here on the actual stages: http://www.interceptinterventions.co...-of-addiction/.

They are mostly referring to substance abuse, but some behaviors and characteristics apply to us as well.

I'd say I'm probably between stage 2 and 3. I'm able to take breaks from the Sugar Lifestyle when I'm in a money pinch or other life issues come up before I'm in serious trouble. I take care of my regular responsibilities before sugaring. So I make sure I always provide first for my family. That said, I've had some close calls where an unexpected expense came up and I had less of a cushion because of my sugar activities. But I've never gotten to the point where I've decided to give money to sugar babies instead of putting food on the table. I'm still capable of taking 5-6 months off from the lifestyle voluntarily if I feel I need to without being forced.

However anyone who's read my reports here know that I sometimes engage in some risky behavior. But they're still managed risks and I haven't become completely reckless. Believe me, I've had plenty of chances to do way more crazy things or spend way more time and money on SBs, but I still try to do things in moderation. It's important to have self-awareness of what you're doing that way it's easier to catch yourself when you start to get out of control.

And we have to accept that a marriage one way or another is going to suffer while we do these activities. If you're trying to fix a marriage or preserve a good marriage, then the sugar bowl is probably not the way to do it. My SO completely let herself go physically and that was one of the big problems we had. I'm now banging 20 year-olds with 10 x hotter bodies and while I'm enjoying my time immensely, it's not exactly fixing that problem with the SO. In fact it's gotten worse because I now find my SO even less attractive now that I'm banging young hardbodies on a weekly basis. My SO does give me companionship on level that no SB I've met so far has really come close to yet. So I actually do appreciate the companionship aspect more from my SO than I did before.

Lately I've begun to take the old-school view of things. The SO is there to grow old with and you take on a mistress to make you feel young again. In many cultures mistresses are the accepted norm in society. It makes sense to me. Both fill needs that need to be met. You can't expect a SO to have a teenage hardbody forever. And it's hard to expect a 18-22 year old girl to have the life experience, maturity and wisdom of a woman 2-3 x her age. I know I've personally been a happier person the last couple of years since I've entered the sugar bowl. That said, my energy isn't a limitless pool and I'm sure certain aspects of relationships with my family have suffered while I've been juggling sugar babies and disappearing for hours at a time.

I would just also caution those new to the Sugar Bowl. It's very tempting to go overboard and try to bang every attractive girl that messages you. After all it's literally jaw-dropping initially realizing all these young women (who aren't PROs) wanting to bang an older man. But if you're not careful you can quickly exhaust all your funds and find yourself in a bad financial spot. Your Bowl career will have ended before it really got started. So just take things in moderation. After all you'll realize there is a near endless supply of young women. Yes you may miss out on a young hottie this week, but there will always be another young hottie a month from now, 6 months, or even a year later from now. You just might need to use a slightly different method or goto a new site. But the Pandora's box has been opened and the Sugar Bowl is here to stay, so remembering that might help manage your addiction and keep it under relative control.

Very solid words of wisdom here. And being new to this sugar thing, I've had these exact thoughts bouncing around my brain the past month or so. My biggest issue thus far is cutting them off and letting them down slowly when I want to move to the next. Some of these girls get downright clingy. When I was married a decade ago, I had a four year, full on affair that I got trapped into and wanted out. I appeased the mistress so she would be content and not come looking for me. It about broke me financially. If I kept her happy, she would lay low. Neither my SO or mistress knew of the other. So I have developed some incredible cover and covert skills that would rival any CIA agent's ability over the years. And that is no joke. We all lived in the same town to. It was an insane four years that taught me some harsh and valuable lessons about life in general.

With that said, I am mature enough and have enough self awareness to know this SB hobby will border quickly on addiction for me. It's like stepping into an entire world I've only dreamed of before and can be had any night of the week, anytime I want with just a little skilled communication efforts. It scares me in that sense. But right now, I'm a volume guy. I spent the vast majority of my higher testosterone driven years sexless with a wife who did not care to please or be sexual. This is sort of a makeup time for me. And that is where I scare my own self some.

I love pussy, I love enticing these girls and listening to them moan with pleasure, showing them sexual stuff they never knew about, giving them orgasms they've never had before and so far, all I've seen have wanted seconds. When I was a strapping young lad, built like a NFL linebacker in my 20's -30's I never got that. Hahah, Now I'm middle aged, still decent looking, but the pussy is falling from the trees around me. It's a great feeling brother!

[John G Smith]

Interesting discussion lately on addiction.

There's often considered 4-5 stages of addiction.

Stage 1: Experimentation.

Stage 2: Regular Use.

Stage 3: Risky Use.

Stage 4: Dependence.

Stage 5: Addiction.

More info here on the actual stages: http://www.interceptinterventions.co...-of-addiction/.

They are mostly referring to substance abuse, but some behaviors and characteristics apply to us as well.

I'd say I'm probably between stage 2 and 3. I'm able to take breaks from the Sugar Lifestyle when I'm in a money pinch or other life issues come up before I'm in serious trouble. I take care of my regular responsibilities before sugaring. So I make sure I always provide first for my family. That said, I've had some close calls where an unexpected expense came up and I had less of a cushion because of my sugar activities. But I've never gotten to the point where I've decided to give money to sugar babies instead of putting food on the table. I'm still capable of taking 5-6 months off from the lifestyle voluntarily if I feel I need to without being forced.

However anyone who's read my reports here know that I sometimes engage in some risky behavior. But they're still managed risks and I haven't become completely reckless. Believe me, I've had plenty of chances to do way more crazy things or spend way more time and money on SBs, but I still try to do things in moderation. It's important to have self-awareness of what you're doing that way it's easier to catch yourself when you start to get out of control.

And we have to accept that a marriage one way or another is going to suffer while we do these activities. If you're trying to fix a marriage or preserve a good marriage, then the sugar bowl is probably not the way to do it. My SO completely let herself go physically and that was one of the big problems we had. I'm now banging 20 year-olds with 10 x hotter bodies and while I'm enjoying my time immensely, it's not exactly fixing that problem with the SO. In fact it's gotten worse because I now find my SO even less attractive now that I'm banging young hardbodies on a weekly basis. My SO does give me companionship on level that no SB I've met so far has really come close to yet. So I actually do appreciate the companionship aspect more from my SO than I did before.

Lately I've begun to take the old-school view of things. The SO is there to grow old with and you take on a mistress to make you feel young again. In many cultures mistresses are the accepted norm in society. It makes sense to me. Both fill needs that need to be met. You can't expect a SO to have a teenage hardbody forever. And it's hard to expect a 18-22 year old girl to have the life experience, maturity and wisdom of a woman 2-3 x her age. I know I've personally been a happier person the last couple of years since I've entered the sugar bowl. That said, my energy isn't a limitless pool and I'm sure certain aspects of relationships with my family have suffered while I've been juggling sugar babies and disappearing for hours at a time.

I would just also caution those new to the Sugar Bowl. It's very tempting to go overboard and try to bang every attractive girl that messages you. After all it's literally jaw-dropping initially realizing all these young women (who aren't PROs) wanting to bang an older man. But if you're not careful you can quickly exhaust all your funds and find yourself in a bad financial spot. Your Bowl career will have ended before it really got started. So just take things in moderation. After all you'll realize there is a near endless supply of young women. Yes you may miss out on a young hottie this week, but there will always be another young hottie a month from now, 6 months, or even a year later from now. You just might need to use a slightly different method or goto a new site. But the Pandora's box has been opened and the Sugar Bowl is here to stay, so remembering that might help manage your addiction and keep it under relative control.