Massage Parlor Reports

[HobbyMan51]

In my country, we are very good readers with high comprehension before we smash pie in face.

Like Jerry Lewis was to France, Soupy Sales is a national hero in your country.

[Niteluvr]

In my country, we are very good readers with high comprehension before we smash pie in face.

What country might that be?

[Jrody1]

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

I agree with your list of dumb things mongers do except for the dick pick part. If a provider is asking for face pics you can verify yourself by sending a dick pic to prove your not LEO. They usually say hold a certain amount of fingers or write your phone number down and have it next to your dick.

Secondly. I also disagree with you stating don't ask for nude pics of a provider. If I have doubts a provider is real. I ask them to prove themselves by sending something proactive while I am at their location. Last thing both parties want is an encounter with the police. It isn't new that fake pics and cops pose as women we'd like to meet LOL.

Overall fantastic list of suggestions. Sending pics of cars, your face etc. those are really stupid LOL.

[MunchMacoochie]

Open sign lit at Young's this morning.

[BillDavis007]

For this price including the house fee I would expect FS from the provider.

In my country, we are very good readers with high comprehension before we smash pie in face.

[ILoveHE]

2. 4 for everything including the house fee or just 2. 4 for her?

For this price including the house fee I would expect FS from the provider.
Ignore my comment, I reread the OP the price included FS.

[Runon99]

Yeah but they had a provider in there who was straight up FS and zero inhibitions about it. And that's about as Korean as shit gets in this town.

Another item for your list for mongers: learn what "Korean" means!

[MassageAwesome]

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

7. Run a bunch of flirty game with the provider over text: your provider wants your money, not your word games that rarely resonate over the language barrier. If she's not busy she will play along, but she wants your money. This is her job, not match.com or Tinder.

8. Ask her on a date: smart providers are NOT going to tell you if they have a boyfriend or a husband because it hinders their ability to sell you a HE. Yes, they think you are cute when you tip well and flirt, but as soon as you walk out of the parlor they are thinking about the next easy client who tips well. Do you want to actually date someone who touches a dozen dicks a day? No, you don't.

9. Call your provider to chitchat and flirt with her: dude she's busy working 7 days a week and long hours. She is at work. She is working. In between texting you and four other guys, she is wiping jizz and getting ready to go service some guy who hasn't showered. She's not horny, she's lusting for big tips.

9. Send pictures of your dog: very cute, but better to send her a picture of a $100 bill and tell her you want to give her a big tip.

10. Send pictures of your cat: no!

11. Ask a provider, via phone call, about any potentially illegal services: providers get phone calls every day asking if the shop is full service, if they do "boom boom", etc. Why would they discuss that over the phone with a stranger who could be LE? WTF.

12. Ask a provider, via text message, if they are FS or request any information that purports illegal activities: Why would a provider put that in writing to a potential LE?

13. Repeatedly ask a provider for services that they have already declined: a lack of respect isn't going to get you oral or anything else you were hoping for.

14. Asking a provider to send you a picture of "the lineup today": see above.

15. Thinking that you are one of the biggest tipping clients: WRONG, your provider has someone who throws large and doesn't even want a HE.

I'm not the only one who has witnessed this shit or has an ATF who spills the beans about this stuff.

To all the rookie mongers, read all of this and absorb the info. These girls are like Snoop Dogg: they don't love dem hoes LOL.

[Surch2020]

I agree these ladies are working for money just like all of us, but I would add that they are generally good people with feelings too. Showing kindness and respect to them is just as memorable as being as the money.

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

7. Run a bunch of flirty game with the provider over text: your provider wants your money, not your word games that rarely resonate over the language barrier. If she's not busy she will play along, but she wants your money. This is her job, not match.com or Tinder.

8. Ask her on a date: smart providers are NOT going to tell you if they have a boyfriend or a husband because it hinders their ability to sell you a HE. Yes, they think you are cute when you tip well and flirt, but as soon as you walk out of the parlor they are thinking about the next easy client who tips well. Do you want to actually date someone who touches a dozen dicks a day? No, you don't.

9. Call your provider to chitchat and flirt with her: dude she's busy working 7 days a week and long hours. She is at work. She is working. In between texting you and four other guys, she is wiping jizz and getting ready to go service some guy who hasn't showered. She's not horny, she's lusting for big tips.

9. Send pictures of your dog: very cute, but better to send her a picture of a $100 bill and tell her you want to give her a big tip.

10. Send pictures of your cat: no!

11. Ask a provider, via phone call, about any potentially illegal services: providers get phone calls every day asking if the shop is full service, if they do "boom boom", etc. Why would they discuss that over the phone with a stranger who could be LE? WTF.

12. Ask a provider, via text message, if they are FS or request any information that purports illegal activities: Why would a provider put that in writing to a potential LE?

13. Repeatedly ask a provider for services that they have already declined: a lack of respect isn't going to get you oral or anything else you were hoping for.

14. Asking a provider to send you a picture of "the lineup today": see above.

15. Thinking that you are one of the biggest tipping clients: WRONG, your provider has someone who throws large and doesn't even want a HE.

I'm not the only one who has witnessed this shit or has an ATF who spills the beans about this stuff.

[CrestWood87]

Includes the house fee, everything.

Thank you for the clarification.

[Champ1201]

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

7. Run a bunch of flirty game with the provider over text: your provider wants your money, not your word games that rarely resonate over the language barrier. If she's not busy she will play along, but she wants your money. This is her job, not match.com or Tinder.

8. Ask her on a date: smart providers are NOT going to tell you if they have a boyfriend or a husband because it hinders their ability to sell you a HE. Yes, they think you are cute when you tip well and flirt, but as soon as you walk out of the parlor they are thinking about the next easy client who tips well. Do you want to actually date someone who touches a dozen dicks a day? No, you don't.

I concur. I have to say I've never come close to any of these actions. A little respect goes a long way. The only thing I'm guilty of and I'm surely to get roasted here is tipping without a HE on occasion for a great massage and attention that I thing I deserve.

[CrestWood87]

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

Very Wise words Sir.

[Mike454]

True, they are Usually only interested in the size of your wallet or bank acct.

Wiseacre is on point. Very well put, funny as shit, but every word true.

In most cases they are playing you for what they can get, but occasionally ,it goes both ways. Lol

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

7. Run a bunch of flirty game with the provider over text: your provider wants your money, not your word games that rarely resonate over the language barrier. If she's not busy she will play along, but she wants your money. This is her job, not match.com or Tinder.

8. Ask her on a date: smart providers are NOT going to tell you if they have a boyfriend or a husband because it hinders their ability to sell you a HE. Yes, they think you are cute when you tip well and flirt, but as soon as you walk out of the parlor they are thinking about the next easy client who tips well. Do you want to actually date someone who touches a dozen dicks a day? No, you don't.

9. Call your provider to chitchat and flirt with her: dude she's busy working 7 days a week and long hours. She is at work. She is working. In between texting you and four other guys, she is wiping jizz and getting ready to go service some guy who hasn't showered. She's not horny, she's lusting for big tips.

9. Send pictures of your dog: very cute, but better to send her a picture of a $100 bill and tell her you want to give her a big tip.

10. Send pictures of your cat: no!

11. Ask a provider, via phone call, about any potentially illegal services: providers get phone calls every day asking if the shop is full service, if they do "boom boom", etc. Why would they discuss that over the phone with a stranger who could be LE? WTF.

12. Ask a provider, via text message, if they are FS or request any information that purports illegal activities: Why would a provider put that in writing to a potential LE?

13. Repeatedly ask a provider for services that they have already declined: a lack of respect isn't going to get you oral or anything else you were hoping for.

14. Asking a provider to send you a picture of "the lineup today": see above.

15. Thinking that you are one of the biggest tipping clients: WRONG, your provider has someone who throws large and doesn't even want a HE.

I'm not the only one who has witnessed this shit or has an ATF who spills the beans about this stuff.

[JDont]

Dumb things mongers do:

1. Sending a selfie: she has seen better bodies than yours, better six packs, better chests, better hair, etc. This does not make her hot. Send her a pic of your fat wallet and giant tip instead. You would be amazed the number of guys who send unsolicited "hot" selfies to providers.

2. Sending a dick pic: she has seen bigger dicks, better looking dicks, harder dicks. In fact, if she is a good provider she is seeing 10 dicks a day. Send her a pic of your dick if it is made of money and squirts out large tips, because that gets her hot.

3. Sending a pic of your car: she has seen bigger cars, better looking cars, etc. Send her a picture of your car if it has a trunkload of Benjamins for her tip, and that will get her excited.

4. Asking for a picture of your provider: your provider does not want to give you anything for your spank bank.

5. Asking for a nude picture of your provider: your provider only wants you to see her nude if you give her a huge tip.

6. Flash a wallet full of hundreds then tip the provider $40: she is not impressed by your money, she wants a big tip.

7. Run a bunch of flirty game with the provider over text: your provider wants your money, not your word games that rarely resonate over the language barrier. If she's not busy she will play along, but she wants your money. This is her job, not match.com or Tinder.

8. Ask her on a date: smart providers are NOT going to tell you if they have a boyfriend or a husband because it hinders their ability to sell you a HE. Yes, they think you are cute when you tip well and flirt, but as soon as you walk out of the parlor they are thinking about the next easy client who tips well. Do you want to actually date someone who touches a dozen dicks a day? No, you don't.

9. Call your provider to chitchat and flirt with her: dude she's busy working 7 days a week and long hours. She is at work. She is working. In between texting you and four other guys, she is wiping jizz and getting ready to go service some guy who hasn't showered. She's not horny, she's lusting for big tips.

9. Send pictures of your dog: very cute, but better to send her a picture of a $100 bill and tell her you want to give her a big tip.

10. Send pictures of your cat: no!

11. Ask a provider, via phone call, about any potentially illegal services: providers get phone calls every day asking if the shop is full service, if they do "boom boom", etc. Why would they discuss that over the phone with a stranger who could be LE? WTF.

12. Ask a provider, via text message, if they are FS or request any information that purports illegal activities: Why would a provider put that in writing to a potential LE?

13. Repeatedly ask a provider for services that they have already declined: a lack of respect isn't going to get you oral or anything else you were hoping for.

14. Asking a provider to send you a picture of "the lineup today": see above.

15. Thinking that you are one of the biggest tipping clients: WRONG, your provider has someone who throws large and doesn't even want a HE.

I'm not the only one who has witnessed this shit or has an ATF who spills the beans about this stuff.

Great post. That's the game. Some are master manipulators. Some guys call them a girlfriend while they call you an atm. But occasionally some of us play the game to.

[Ohmz11]

2. 4 for everything including the house fee or just 2. 4 for her?

Includes the house fee, everything.