BackPage Advertiser Reviews

Been a long time lurker (have also been reprimanded for not contributing). TOFTT a couple of weeks ago and still have the bad smell lingering. This is another fake by the name of Ava in Springfield. She also works in Herndon at times and this is where I saw here. Says, she is from Florida.

[url]http://nova.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/iwan-tto-beyour-favori-teg-i-r-l-25/5231767[/url]

Phone number: 703-362-4435.

The pictures looked too good to be true and there were no results on TinEye. Lesson learned (post ripoff) that Google Image Search works better sometimes than TinEye. Anyways, my little head took the decision and I went for a $140 for the hr (TGTBT). She was not the girl in the pics and had a flabby body with a few tats and piercings (which I do not like). Anyways, since I was there, I was like WTH. In and out in 30 minutes. She just rubbed me over with some cheap oil and just tried to get me off with a body slide. I was told that I could DATY but her backdoor smelled like month old trash can and I wanted to puke right there (this is after she tells me that she is a nursing student and is careful about hygiene). She succeeds in getting me off in 20 minutes and then she goes away, takes a call and then starts to get dressed indicating that my time was up. I felt ripped off but then this is what happens to novices. I have had better times. Will share more.

Just wanted to warn folks here.

[QUOTE=Norm Leone; 1385063]Quite Quick? Quite Quiet? Quality Quick? Quick Quiet? Quack Quack? I am out of guesses. Please enlighten me.

Thanks,

Norm[/QUOTE]Quarter Quickie. 15 minutes.

Visited Brenda today. 2 call set up. Actually I tried to set something up for earlier in the day and she said she could see me a couple hours later. I thought here we go I'm going to get flaked. However she did let me know the area she was at. Called back at the proposed time and she sound so excited to hear from me."Oh Papi you are already here!" She told me right where to go and I didn't have to stand in the hallway and play phone tag. When she opened the door it was like wow. Guys the pics are accurate. Nice rack and a great attitude. She even had on the outfit from the ad. Gave me a big hug. Sat down and visited her for a while. She made me feel real comfortable. She is real nice. I asked for the hour and I guess her schedule is full. I ended up staying for about 30 min and tuition was $.4. Everything is on the menu although I didn't ask about greek. Light kissing was allowed. She was eager to get to the BJ. She micked junior while I laid on my back, while she laid on her back. Went to cowgirl real slow and wanted doggie real soon. Switched to a modified mish with her on her side. Finished in mish with me letting it go on those great tits. She showered I dressed and gave me a big hug. I will repeat. She will only be around for a little over a week. Treat her nice.

[url]http://nova.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/back-in-town-brenda-dominican-girl-cll-_-right-_-now-25/6489394[/url]

787-XXX-9686

[QUOTE=Phillie;1385550]Quarter Quickie. 15 minutes.[/QUOTE]That's what I said.

RTFF! I should have followed this advice. I was passing Springfield last Saturday and saw Kellie Sue. I thought TGTBT because she offered me everything for $50. I went over to her mid-level notel and I could not tell if she was the one from the pictures. She is ok looking and she was friendly. I should have realized the smell of like freaking sardines was not from styrofoam food containers. It gets better.

I laid down the donation and got comfy. She starts a great GREAT BBBJ. The TV was on and it distracted a bit but the BBBJ was going well. I asked for doggie because I was getting ready to bust and wanted at least a sample of twat before I reached home. She backed up to the edge of the bed and I pounded the hell out of her doggie. When I was ready she turned around and caught everything in her mouth. She milked me clean. Did not offer cleanup or nothing.

Small talk and I left happy.

2 hours later I arrive at my apt and I must have been de-scentsatized to the smell. I took off my dungarees to take a shower and OMFG! Holy Hell! It smelled like a rendering plant in my pants. There were white staings all in my underwear and my pants were sour as hell. I showered for about 1-hour and ended up shaving all my hairs down there. It was rank as hell. I through away my underwear, pants, and the washcloth I used.

I headed back out to the store and when I got in my car that shit stank too. It smelled like sardines that had been sitting in the sun for a week. I left the windows down and went back to my apartment and my whole house had the smell. It was torture. For the next 24 hours I cold not shake that ordor.

I went to store on Base and bought some tomato juice and Summers Eve Douche. I got sprayed by a skunk back in the 70's and tomato juice worked. I didn't need it though because that Douche did the fucking trick. I wiped everything down I touched with anti biolicial wipes with a douse of Summers Eve and Vinegar. The smell is fading away but I guess psychologically its still here.

On another note I went on sick call and got tested Monday. This was my wakeup call. Everything covered except the BBBJCIM, but the smell is like death. Negative on my test results. Whew.

[QUOTE=SSmitty8; 1381392]Been perusing this forum for awhile now, it's very helpful in figuring out who's legit. However, apparantly I don't know how to heed the valuable advice you people offer. Ignoring Bunker's review, I had to see for myself about this. 5 deal Kellie Sue offers, and I thought I would be satisfied with BBBJ cim in the event his evaluation was spot on. Well, not only was Bunker spot on, it was exactly as described, every single word. Got to the hotel, got the room # after a bit of confusion, and was met by a decently cute lady (maybe around 40ish). Well kept body for her age, and although 100% business, she actually had a very pleasant demeanor. Within about 30 seconds of walking in the room, she said "let's get this started". We both undressed, she squated by the edge of the bed, and I walked over and noticed many dried white stains on top of the blanket. She told me to lie down on my back. Oh my gosh, here we go. I hesitated, but already dropped my money down and didn't want to start off on a bad note. Mistake #1. Lay down on my back and she started with the BBBJ. If a BBBJ can be all-business, this was it, she never took her mouth off and just went straight for the suction. More on this in a second. After about 30 seconds, she said she can't be on top be / see she hurt her back blah blah blah, so did I want to be on top or go doggy. I said. Doggy (wince). As Bunker noted, omfg, omfg. I actually thought I would be able to handle it, but this. This was other-worldly. I have never in my life experienced a stench of this magnitude, and as soon as she got in position, I immediately went limp. It was like a mike tyson punch in the face, and I was staggering around the ring, trying my best to think quickly. I somehow was able to recall my backup plan, told her it wasn't going to happen, and asked for a BJ instead. Here's where I can't fault her, she agreed right away. I should have let her handle the rubber, but I took it off with my left hand. Mistake #2. Greasy and with an odor that would knock out a grizzly bear, I laid back and stuffed my hands behind the pillow, not wanting to get it on myself and trying to wipe off whatever the hell was on there. She went back to the BBBJ (which I have to commend her for doing) , and sucked like there was no tomorrow. About five minutes later, cim, she immediately slid off the bed and into the bathroom to clean up. I should have followed, but the stench had stung me too bad. I got up, put my clothes on and staggered out to my car. I drove the 30 miles back home with my right finger only, holding my left hand in the air, careful not to touch anything. The stench, OMG, it is an entity of its own. When I got home, immediately threw the clothes in the washing machine, turned the hot water in the shower to the max, and jumped in head first. Scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed some more, and afterwards, scrubbed again some more. Scope brush, scope brush, scope. Go to my computer to register for an account here so I can tell my story, and can still smell it. It cannot be killed.

A couple questions at this point:

1. Can anyone who's seen her previously tell me if the stench will eventually die? Maybe yanking all my nose hair follicles will do the trick.

2. Does anyone know if I can get a std from the BBBJ? I've never had one, so if so, can anyone tell me what to look out for?

Thanks, and happy mongering. I guess. I for one will never go for the discounted provider ever again thank you very much, will stick with the $$/hr ladies.

[url]http://nova.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/50-special-kellie-sue-is-up-early-29/6625798[/url][/QUOTE]

Noob here.

I am looking for a halfway decent massage with a happy ending. I am not really that interested in the asian places.

I am half asian myself and just haven't found asian women all that attractive, I dunno, I guess they are like my sister or something.

I am not looking for BJ's or that sort of thing, just a good HJ.

Any ideas where to find such a thing? I am out near Manassas.

[QUOTE=Miketastic69; 1386296]RTFF! I should have followed this advice. I was passing Springfield last Saturday and saw Kellie Sue. I should have realized the smell of like freaking sardines was not from styrofoam food containers.

2 hours later I arrive at my apt and I must have been de-scentsatized to the smell. I took off my dungarees to take a shower and OMFG! Holy Hell! It smelled like a rendering plant in my pants. There were white staings all in my underwear and my pants were sour as hell. I showered for about 1-hour and ended up shaving all my hairs down there. It was rank as hell. I through away my underwear, pants, and the washcloth I used.

When I got in my car that shit stank too. It smelled like sardines that had been sitting in the sun for a week. I left the windows down and went back to my apartment and my whole house had the smell. It was torture. For the next 24 hours I cold not shake that ordor.

I went to store on Base and bought some tomato juice and Summers Eve Douche. I got sprayed by a skunk back in the 70's and tomato juice worked. I didn't need it though because that Douche did the fucking trick. I wiped everything down I touched with anti biolicial wipes with a douse of Summers Eve and Vinegar. The smell is fading away but I guess psychologically its still here.[/QUOTE]I warned everyone as quickly as possible, then Brother Smitty sent up a flare and an upside down flag too. This is now one of the best-marked hazards on the navigational charts, and our posts should probably be copied over into their own thread.

The historical medical texts need to be updated. There are now [I]four[/I] Major hazards associated with trench warfare: Trench Foot, Trench Fever, Trench Mouth, and the Kellie-Sue Trench Stench.

[url]http://www.westernfrontassociation.com/great-war-on-land/43-britain-allies/393-trench-dieases.html[/url]

[QUOTE]Finally, no overview of trench life can avoid the aspect that instantly struck visitors to the lines: the appalling reek given off by numerous conflicting sources.

Rotting carcases lay around in their thousands.

Overflowing latrines would similarly give off a most offensive stench.

Men who had not been afforded the luxury of a bath in weeks or months would offer the pervading odour of dried sweat. The feet were generally accepted to give off the worst odour.

[url]http://www.firstworldwar.com/features/trenchlife.htm[/url][/QUOTE]

Go to shower take towel & soap.

[QUOTE=FlowMaster;1386328]I am not looking for BJ's or that sort of thing, just a good HJ. Any ideas where to find such a thing?[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Miketastic69; 1386296].

I headed back out to the store and when I got in my car that shit stank too. It smelled like sardines that had been sitting in the sun for a week. I left the windows down and went back to my apartment and my whole house had the smell. It was torture. For the next 24 hours I cold not shake that ordor.

I went to store on Base and bought some tomato juice and Summers Eve Douche. I got sprayed by a skunk back in the 70's and tomato juice worked. I didn't need it though because that Douche did the fucking trick. I wiped everything down I touched with anti biolicial wipes with a douse of Summers Eve and Vinegar. The smell is fading away but I guess psychologically its still here.

On another note I went on sick call and got tested Monday. This was my wakeup call. Everything covered except the BBBJCIM, but the smell is like death. Negative on my test results. Whew.[/QUOTE]After I read your review, I can't eat any kitty for awhile. LOL. I don't mean to laugh, but it's just too much. When her kitty smells that bad, I am very sure she has some type of diseases. Be careful guys.

[QUOTE=FlowMaster; 1386328]Noob here.

I am looking for a halfway decent massage with a happy ending. I am not really that interested in the asian places.

I am half asian myself and just haven't found asian women all that attractive, I dunno, I guess they are like my sister or something.

I am not looking for BJ's or that sort of thing, just a good HJ.

Any ideas where to find such a thing? I am out near Manassas.[/QUOTE]First of all, you posted in the wrong damn forum. This is the Backpage forum. Next time only post in the Massage Parlor forum. Second, Just go to any massage parlor and relax and enjoy the massage. If you happen to get a handjob then come back on here and tell us the place, the girls name, how much you spent and tipped and then we will help you. Smile and go away because you bore me.

[QUOTE=Fun Sex;1386432]After I read your review, I can't eat any kitty for awhile. LOL. I don't mean to laugh, but it's just too much. When her kitty smells that bad, I am very sure she has some type of diseases. Be careful guys.[/QUOTE]I saw Kellie Sue yesterday! OMG! I stopped by for the $50 and am more amused than worried at this point. I'm thinking she reads the forum though since she didn't smell when I hit that. Also, she wouldn't CIM. Who knows, who cares! I'll be on the lookout for rashes bumps or the dreaded razor blades! LOL.

Be safe gang.

P

[QUOTE=Sir Amp Alot;1386559]First of all, you posted in the wrong damn forum. This is the Backpage forum. Next time only post in the Massage Parlor forum. Second, Just go to any massage parlor and relax and enjoy the massage. If you happen to get a handjob then come back on here and tell us the place, the girls name, how much you spent and tipped and then we will help you. Smile and go away because you bore me.[/QUOTE]Sorry dude, a three weeks ago I visited this chick in see'ville that goes by magichands (43). Have to say that the massage was okay, but there was nothing but massage there.

Anyone meet up with Jade in Fairfax?

[QUOTE=Miketastic69; 1386296]RTFF! I should have followed this advice. I was passing Springfield last Saturday and saw Kellie Sue. I thought TGTBT because she offered me everything for $50. I went over to her mid-level notel and I could not tell if she was the one from the pictures. She is ok looking and she was friendly. I should have realized the smell of like freaking sardines was not from styrofoam food containers. It gets better.

I laid down the donation and got comfy. She starts a great GREAT BBBJ. The TV was on and it distracted a bit but the BBBJ was going well. I asked for doggie because I was getting ready to bust and wanted at least a sample of twat before I reached home. She backed up to the edge of the bed and I pounded the hell out of her doggie. When I was ready she turned around and caught everything in her mouth. She milked me clean. Did not offer cleanup or nothing.

Small talk and I left happy.

2 hours later I arrive at my apt and I must have been de-scentsatized to the smell. I took off my dungarees to take a shower and OMFG! Holy Hell! It smelled like a rendering plant in my pants. There were white staings all in my underwear and my pants were sour as hell. I showered for about 1-hour and ended up shaving all my hairs down there. It was rank as hell. I through away my underwear, pants, and the washcloth I used.

I headed back out to the store and when I got in my car that shit stank too. It smelled like sardines that had been sitting in the sun for a week. I left the windows down and went back to my apartment and my whole house had the smell. It was torture. For the next 24 hours I cold not shake that ordor.

I went to store on Base and bought some tomato juice and Summers Eve Douche. I got sprayed by a skunk back in the 70's and tomato juice worked. I didn't need it though because that Douche did the fucking trick. I wiped everything down I touched with anti biolicial wipes with a douse of Summers Eve and Vinegar. The smell is fading away but I guess psychologically its still here.

On another note I went on sick call and got tested Monday. This was my wakeup call. Everything covered except the BBBJCIM, but the smell is like death. Negative on my test results. Whew.[/QUOTE]Try Fabreeze on your cock, LOL That should do it. :_.

Anytime I smell the cooch and it aint right, I ask the hoe to douche or just leave as its a crying shame that these hoes can't keep there money maker clean, no excuses anytime.

PC out

I had a little time and I decided to give her a call. She was close and available so I head over. Typical 3 call system and I am at her door. She is a little thing with lots of tats. We go over the pricing and settle in on the half for 100. She takes off he dress and comes over to me to let me suck on those natural tits. She then turns around to let me see her round ass and she reaches back and starts stroking my cock. After a few mins she tells me to lay back and get comfortable and she puts the cover on. She starts a nice CBJ for about 5 mins or so then she climbs on top for some cg. This is nice and we go at it for about 10 mins then she climbs off and wants me on top. I slide into her and can't help but notice how little she is. We start going at it and she starts talking to me very sexy. After about 10 mins of this I pop in the cover. She laid there with me inside and milked me with her pussy muscles until I was dry. She never hurried me even though she had a regular waiting in the parking lot. Sexy little thing and I probably will repeat. Happy Hunting.

209-513-0320.

[url]http://nova.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/sexy-top-notch-southern-blonde-beauty-100-incall-specials-22/6419229[/url]

Warlock

[QUOTE=Warlock01; 1387253]I had a little time and I decided to give her a call. She was close and available so I head over. Typical 3 call system and I am at her door. She is a little thing with lots of tats. We go over the pricing and settle in on the half for 100. She takes off he dress and comes over to me to let me suck on those natural tits. She then turns around to let me see her round ass and she reaches back and starts stroking my cock. After a few mins she tells me to lay back and get comfortable and she puts the cover on. She starts a nice CBJ for about 5 mins or so then she climbs on top for some cg. This is nice and we go at it for about 10 mins then she climbs off and wants me on top. I slide into her and can't help but notice how little she is. We start going at it and she starts talking to me very sexy. After about 10 mins of this I pop in the cover. She laid there with me inside and milked me with her pussy muscles until I was dry. She never hurried me even though she had a regular waiting in the parking lot. Sexy little thing and I probably will repeat. Happy Hunting.

209-513-0320.

[url]http://nova.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/sexy-top-notch-southern-blonde-beauty-100-incall-specials-22/6419229[/url]

Warlock[/QUOTE]Take the shorter session, then ask about upgrade to greek finish mid-stroke. Cost me the same as your half hour.