Bikini Baristas

There's this new "company" bandying about on insta called Tops Off Cleaning (insta handle is topsoffcleaning).

From what I can gather, you pay something like $190 for an hour of topless cleaning from a barista girl. It's all above board and you have to sign documents, and let (get this) armed fucking security dudes search your house prior for danger and hidden cams. Then, those same armed guys stay outside your house the entire time. They are partnering with some security company for this.

You are not allowed to do literally anything but watch them clean while topless, and any chicanery will be "reported to police". All of this is according to their own instagram posts.

I can't think of something I'd pass harder on LOL. Wow, I get to pay for the right to have some dudes with guns search my house? Wow, how fun!

[QUOTE=DavidIs21;6632565]i really hope it's not for too long because thats the only reason id go[/QUOTE]I spoke to a barista there yesterday and she stated that they are closing it because the owner saw this thread.

[QUOTE=Johnnieb33;6635446]I spoke to a barista there yesterday and she stated that they are closing it because the owner saw this thread.[/QUOTE]Lolz. Back to the car dates.

[QUOTE=GreenCandles;6634962]There's this new "company" bandying about on insta called Tops Off Cleaning (insta handle is topsoffcleaning).

From what I can gather, you pay something like $190 for an hour of topless cleaning from a barista girl. It's all above board and you have to sign documents, and let (get this) armed fucking security dudes search your house prior for danger and hidden cams. Then, those same armed guys stay outside your house the entire time. They are partnering with some security company for this.

You are not allowed to do literally anything but watch them clean while topless, and any chicanery will be "reported to police". All of this is according to their own instagram posts.

I can't think of something I'd pass harder on LOL. Wow, I get to pay for the right to have some dudes with guns search my house? Wow, how fun![/QUOTE]Maybe this is one of those scenarios where you tip the guard to get lost or look the other way. But no way in hell I'm allowing an armed "security" guard into my house and go through my shit.

Anyone been to the stands in tacoma / lakewood / spanaway? Any girls let you JO?

[QUOTE=Anony;6639425]Maybe this is one of those scenarios where you tip the guard to get lost or look the other way. But no way in hell I'm allowing an armed "security" guard into my house and go through my shit.[/QUOTE]LOL no girl is worth all that trouble.

[QUOTE=Hman206;6597295]Anybody check any of these girls out? Pricing and menus seem TGTBT.[/QUOTE]Yup, they are real I used their service while in B. C.

FYI CAD is about 25% lower then USD.

[QUOTE=ProJohn1;6639740]LOL no girl is worth all that trouble.[/QUOTE]Yep. Plus whoever runs the instagram account for this shit ass company is already lecturing men on how to behave. Classic entitled behavior. Seeing some mid hoe from Seattle scrub down a bathtub without a top on isn't really worth the money it takes just to see them at a stand for a second.

That whole "company" can fuck off. Hopefully there aren't too many techy autists willing to pay for it.

Anyone see Coffeewlayla? Her profile is hot, but I think she used to have a lot of nos on her page.

[QUOTE=CoffeeTurd;6644858]Anyone see Coffeewlayla? Her profile is hot, but I think she used to have a lot of nos on her page.[/QUOTE]It cracks me up how they announce when they "sign" a new *****. "She is a leader in the bikini barista industry and looks to bring her talents to the cleaning industry!" They announce the "signing" of these girls like they are bringing on board a google engineer to there start up or something. "Leader in the bikini barista industry" LOL!

[QUOTE=ProJohn1;6647327]It cracks me up how they announce when they "sign" a new *****. "She is a leader in the bikini barista industry and looks to bring her talents to the cleaning industry!" They announce the "signing" of these girls like they are bringing on board a google engineer to there start up or something. "Leader in the bikini barista industry" LOL![/QUOTE]Pretty much. These are real experts in making shitty coffee and bitching on instagram when they don't get tips. I'm sure their cleaning skills are going to be top notch, but don't even make a move near your junk or else they'll call in the stranger with a gun to what. Shoot you? lmao

Hey mongers, keeping this short. What are you top tips for someone visiting barista stands for the first time? Been in Seattle for a while but never managed to visit one. I have a list of some of the stands closer to me but need some help on how to approach girls for shows or ask them for extra 'nicely'. What are some of your ways to chat them up without being rude or overpowering? Thanks!

[QUOTE=Donger69;6648511]Hey mongers, keeping this short. What are you top tips for someone visiting barista stands for the first time? Been in Seattle for a while but never managed to visit one. I have a list of some of the stands closer to me but need some help on how to approach girls for shows or ask them for extra 'nicely'. What are some of your ways to chat them up without being rude or overpowering? Thanks![/QUOTE]Most baristas will give you a little show for being polite, paying for your drink with a $20, and when they ask if you want the change saying "no that is for you".

If there isn't a line, a simple "I'd like to see X / more X" will open negotiations. Which leads to a key point for a first visit. Don't hold up the line. If she starts hinting to move on, move on. As a corollary, try not to visit when there is a long line.

[QUOTE=Donger69;6648511]Hey mongers, keeping this short. What are you top tips for someone visiting barista stands for the first time? Been in Seattle for a while but never managed to visit one. I have a list of some of the stands closer to me but need some help on how to approach girls for shows or ask them for extra 'nicely'. What are some of your ways to chat them up without being rude or overpowering? Thanks![/QUOTE]Plenty of good advice, rtff. But if you look back I think one of my posts was pretty helpful on how to.

[QUOTE=GreenCandles;6647775]Pretty much. These are real experts in making shitty coffee and bitching on instagram when they don't get tips. I'm sure their cleaning skills are going to be top notch, but don't even make a move near your junk or else they'll call in the stranger with a gun to what. Shoot you? lmao[/QUOTE]Yea speaking of cleaning and shitty coffee. I would never ever touch the coffee in any of those places. A lot of those stands don't even have running water. Running water is not required to operate a coffee stand just FYI for any of you mongers who actually drink that coffee. So who knows how clean those machines are / those girls hands.