Things are definitely looking up!
My brothers (Mandy included) ,
I got back into town last night after a lovely long weekend of RandR, and was delighted to read all the posts on the various exploits, considered opinions, and helpful advice from you all. This has got to be the Greatest Thread In The World, right?
Joe, by now you are on the other side of your overnight, and I am certain it was all you hoped for and most probably more. If you are like I was after my first, you are sitting quietly somewhere, staring out the window with a silly grin on your face. Please share when you are able to make coherent sentences!
George, welcome to the Bowl. It sounds like you may have had a little experience under your belt already, but as we all can attest, you never stop learning or polishing your game. Nando and the rest have commented eloquently on the issue of sugar, monogamy, personal revelations etc, so I will refrain from adding my two cents with one exception, which is to second the cautionary statement about revealing [I][B]anything[/B][/I] to a Nando 1. There is just no upside in it. It will not engender trust, closer feelings, greater intimacy or anything like that. The only thing it does is expose you to potentially catastrophic trouble. Someone mentioned the difficulty in maintaining their alter-ego, and while I agree to a point, it is also paramount to understand the level of baby you are playing with. If you can't stay under deep cover, don't mess with the 1's.
As for me, I had a lovely morning talking with a trusted friend, and am hoping that continues to be a constant as our schedules allow.
Brit and I are arranging a play date for next week, when the Mater will be safely back in Texas.
Polo is back in the on-deck circle, though no firm arrangement has been made, the week being almost over and me not being an eccentric millionaire but in reality someone who has to work from time to time. She has promised to bring some of her favorite toys to our next get-together, so that is something to look forward to. She also tells me that the recent sunshine we have had has upped her freckle count somewhat, so a thorough examination is clearly in order.
As predicted, Cherokee princess has dived down her burrow again, and is refusing all my entreaties to come out and play. I am going to proceed here as if it were an impossibility, and just something that is amusing to pursue as time and inclination allows. If she comes to the net, all to the good. If not, I will not sweat it.
My ATF and I have plans to get together on Friday for lunch and, if all goes well, a little hide-and-seek at the new apartment. I did not want to burden you all with my insecurities, but I had really thought she was gone for good this time, but apparently she was just overwhelmed with the move, work, end of school and so forth. I'm so relieved.
Keep up the excellent work, my friends. I look forward to hearing of your escapades!
Scott
Could this be our clubhouse t-shirt?
[QUOTE=Hernando;1444195]I have never had bad sex with anyone, some are just better than others.[/QUOTE]Nando,
Yet again, you strike to the heart of the matter. Sometimes I wish I weren't Irish, and so could be a little more pithy. I also agree with your statement that entering into any new relationship is a combination of anticipation and anxiety. We just don't know how things will turn out until they turn out. Hope for the best, and give the baby a chance, or maybe two. What did Joe say a while back, something about it being just like real life, only we both know it's pure fantasy? To me, that encapsulates the reality that it is both ours and the baby's responsibility to preserve and contribute to the relationship / illusion. My ATF calls our time together "vacations". I like that.
Scott
I've got a Stage 5 Clinger.
Ok, maybe it's not quite that bad, but my overnight with Unemployed Sugar Baby (USB), though very nice, was not without drama.
I picked her up Monday after work, and she looked absolutely amazing. Her hot, form fitting dress was just about the perfect mix of sexy and classy, and her fuck me pumps were whispering my name all night. We stopped at the hotel so I could change, and as much as I wanted to get down to business right there, we had dinner reservations nearby that kept us on our best behavior. Dinner was wonderful--great conversation, flirty looks and touches, amazing food. We passed on dessert because we were both stuffed, but also because we were both eager to return to the room. The indoor fun began almost as soon as the hotel room door closed behind us. Oh. My. God. This girl is an absolute freak. I have to admit I was a little intimidated by her in the first few minutes; I'm good at following directions, but she was shouting out orders like a drill sergeant. Not normally my cup of tea, but since it was clear every possible option was on the menu, I happily got into it. And this is not to imply that the entire show was about her. She was very concerned with ensuring that I was having a good time as well.
After a marathon of a session, we decided to relax for a while. She wanted to get out of the room again, so we walked over to the nearby casino for some drinks and people watching (neither of us is much of a gambler). It was there that the trouble, if you want to call it that, started. She clearly had had a good time to this point in the evening, as had I, and while thanking me for arranging everything, she said,"I really like you, and I'm worried about your home life, because you seem unhappy. I would hate to lose you."
Given that we were in a public place, I tried to avoid a scene, but I was astonished. I am not unhappy at home, and I have consciously tried to avoid giving her the impression that I am. And she would hate to lose me? I admit that I look for an emotional connection with a SB, but this is moving way too fast, way too early. We've only been meeting up about a month.
I think I was able to handle it diplomatically at the time by trying to acknowledge her feelings while noting that she really shouldn't be concerned. But it put a damper on the rest of the night, at least for me. And I'm not so sure she got the message. I like spending time with her (and did I mention that she's a freak in bed?), but we will have to discuss this before we meet again. As much as I like the GFE, I can't have a clinger. There is absolutely no circumstance under which USB could ever, ever become anything more than a SB.
On another front, and perhaps in a bit of fortuitous timing, I had a second M&G with the 23 year-old hot SB (SB23). We met at a sushi lounge that she picked for its more intimate setting, and it turned out to be a nice choice. Some of you may recall that I was a bit concerned about her age and possible immaturity, but every time I talk with her, those concerns subside even more. She definitely has her head on straight. The conversation was very nice, if a little forward. She has said she hasn't done this before, though I'm not so sure I believe that, and she wanted to know what I was looking for and what she could expect. I gave an honest, straightforward answer, as did she to my probing questions. The topic of an allowance came up, and I think I avoided pinning myself down about as well as I could. In the end, I think we both have similar expectations, and I see things progressing very nicely.
SB23 told me at the end of our first M&G last week that, if we met again, she had a "surprise" for me. Honestly, I had forgotten all about that, but she announced last night that she's a dancer at a local club. Check please. My ATF is a dancer, and I tend to gravitate to dancers for some reason. So, it wasn't that much of a "surprise," but I'm glad she felt comfortable enough to tell me. Overall, the evening was very nice. We had good conversation, and as the night progressed, she kept sliding closer to me on the couch, touching me in that flirty way that a girl touches a guy when she laughs or wants to emphasize something she's saying. It was very cute.
If forced to chose between the two (and I eventually want to focus on only one), I think SB23 has much more promise than USB. SB23 has a couple of jobs, which earns significant bonus points, and she doesn't exhibit any of the signs (that, in retrospect, I should have seen in USB) that she's prone to overly-emotional involvements. So, wish me luck as I try to cool things off with USB and ramp things up with SB23.
As always, I enjoy reading the commentary here, so keep up the good work.
Regards,
Joe
I am in Love. Is this real of newbies?
[QUOTE=JoesParty; 1446252]Well, not really, but M&G #3 with SB23 went very well last night.
But first, before I delve into the details, let me wish you, Mandy, all the best as you finish up your schoolwork for the semester. I've very much enjoyed your contributions here, and if this sounds like ass kissing, it probably is, because you sound like one awesome girl.
Now back to the topic at hand. M&G #2 with SB23, just last Wednesday, went so well that she suggested I stop by her strip club after work last night to meet again. Seeing as how it's not far from my office, who am I to refuse? Plus, I like to be able to window shop before I make a major purchase, and this seemed like the ideal situation in which to sample the goods before making any decisions.
I arrived a little before she was ready, as she had acquired a "surprise" for me and was making sure everything was perfect. When she emerged from the dressing room, I had to pick up my jaw off the floor. Oh. My. God. I knew she was attractive, but she obviously doesn't dress like this in public. She has the most perfectly-toned and tight little 23-year-old spinner body I've ever seen. Ever. And she's recently added some aftermarket see-cups for nice effect. Well done, SB23, well done. Oh, and the surprise (and I don't remember my telling her that this is one of my biggest turn-ons) was a sexy garter belt-cum-stockings outfit that showed off everything nicely.
We had a drink and a nice chat, and I watched her excellent moves during her stage set. She came back to chat for a while longer, and then we headed to the VIP for some private time. It was all good, clean fun, but the talk did turn sexy for a little while (favorite positions and so on). *She* brought up the subject of seeing each other again in a more, ahem, intimate location, which I consider a good sign. And we were able to reach a good compromise on sugar. Apropos of our recent discussions here, I proposed a bi-weekly allowance, to which she happily agreed. She is not comfortable with case-by-case P4P, saying that it would make her feel like a hooker. Not to rehash that discussion here again, but, at this point, I don't see her skipping out of town with my money, so we'll try the bi-weekly pay period plan for a while.
All in all, it was a great night, and, unless I am totally clueless, there are good times ahead. This is not to say that all is perfect in the sugar bowl, as I still have to figure out what to do with USB (unemployed SB). I am hoping that her impending start at a new job will make my decision for me, in that she'll have less time to play.
OK, that's enough for now. Enjoy the weekend, wherever it takes you, my friends.
Regards,
Joe[/QUOTE]Joe: good to hear that you are getting a good start with SB. God Luck with it.
I had a date yesterday, nice day to spend with SB. Dinner, movie, etc. She was rushing for the date and god pulled over (ticket) so little bad start. But. In all. Dinner was very nice, romantic. She opened up. But it kept me wondering. As she is genuine and honest. Am I falling in love with this SB? How real is this world? Am I creating a separate world here to fulfill my dreams? Anyway, at dinner place, there was live band. And some of the songs got us excited, attracted to each other more. It kept me bugging all day today. Why am I thinking about my SB so much?
Will see. But qns to my friends, how much emotionally are you getting attached to SBs? I am new and it is killing me as I am texting with her almost hourly.
I am in Love. Is this real of newbies?
George, we have hashed this over multiple times but it is always fun to reiterate without rewriting the book.
Joe is absolutely correct and the review of this entire blog would be entertaining as well as informative. I have been on since the beginning and it is interesting to see how it has evolved. The direction most of us are going seems to be towards a higher quality Baby and away from the Nando 1 type girls who are desperately poor, substance addicted, and frequently active or semi pros who have often done time. I can't stress enough how important it is to date as " nice " a girl as possible who has ethics and a decent moral structure and upbringing. I know sugar dating and ethics could be an oxymoron, but times are changing. This is important because you are essentially putting control of your future in her hands and other anatomical parts. This is more so if you are married or have a sensitive job where going public could harm you.
Ah / falling in love / lust is so fine and I am "in love" with my SB as are many of our brothers here. We tend to confuse true love with true lust I believe. The lustful passionate part of any relationship lasts from 1 to 2 years where all reason tends to go out the door and we men are blithering idiots around a hot girl who (seems to) adores us (our money ). The operative word is "seem " and " money " The girls are mostly here for Sugar and in return they will treat us to the fantasy that we are seeking. The really smart, experienced, and mature SBs are fabulous actors and know where their bread is buttered, so they will perpetuate the fantasy. The not so smart ones will let their cover slip and it will be harder to "love " them. Now I personally believe that SDs and SBs can experience true love and even go on to an IRL relationship, but I would guess that it is a small minority. The rest of us experience the appearance and feeling of love, but our Sugars will ultimately go on with their real lives. Most want "the dream " a husband, good career. 2.2 kids, the white picket fence, BWW in the paved driveway, Beach cottage, you get the picture.
So the bottom line is to enjoy the ride but don't bet your future on your sexy SB making you her life's work. And guess what? What is the best way to ruin a good friendship? You got it! Marry her.
More on love and strippers (in an unrelated sense)
[QUOTE=Atldrummer; 1447001]I would throw out a word of caution here. I'm not saying that it's not possible to have a great SB who's a dancer. I hope you have found one. Just be aware that in all the aspects of the paid adult world from SBs, to escorts, to strippers, none is more skilled or trained at deceiving and extracting $$$ from a guy for very little return than a stripper. I'm not saying there aren't exceptions, but just don't let your emotions get ahead of your pocketbook.
A good site from years ago (still live) which serves as an example is.
[url]www.ihatestippers.com[/url]
This site has a series of voicemails between a stripper and her target that are both hilarious and scary. I'm sure you're nothing like the guy who is duped by this woman, but it still shows the mentality of many dancers.
Don't mean to be such a bummer with my last two posts.
One of my new SBs is over for dinner tonight and I have M&Gs Mon and Tue evenings. Hopefully more positive reports will come out of those.
Happy hunting!
Drummer[/QUOTE]My ATF is a stripper, so I know to tread carefully here. I'd like to think that I can tell the difference between BS (or, more appropriately, SS (stripper shit) and reality, but it can be difficult sometimes, especially with the best SSers.
Back on the love issue again for a minute, thought. I think maybe, just maybe, most of the time it isn't true love. It's probably infatuation. It feels like love, it looks like love, and it may be in part based on love, but the emotions get carried away. We get ahead of ourselves. We start thinking in terms of dreams instead of reality. This is not to say that true love isn't possible, but it helps to take a step back and try to take an objective look at the situation. Sometimes that helps recalibrate the thinking and emotions.
Great to hear from you Lit
Good to hear from you Lit. Yes, this is a strong and active forum and there are a number of regulars. I can attest that Mandy is as close to "one of the guys" as you will find in someone without a penis. She has been a good contributor and, I think, understands the multi-fucking goings-on as well most since she is herself a participant.
Hope to hear soon that you are back in the game with all cylinders cranking.
Alias
Can you really define sugar?
Golf,
I'm going to have to disagree with you on a number of things. The first being your comment that girls can't possibly actually dig older guys. Well, the first time I had an "older guy" I was 20 and he was 39. 19 year age difference and at that age it was the best sex I'd ever had! Yes, you all, like a fine wine get much better with age. Shortly after that experience I quit dating guys my own age.
Then, there is the mentor fact that obviously a guy our own age can not give us. I immensely enjoy having dinner with Memories and having him challenge my thesis question and whatever research I've just read. It takes education and experience to be able to do that and again, that's not found in younger men. I wanted to chime in on this discussion the last time it came up but didn't have the time. Memories is teice my age and The Doctor is 17 years older than me. Although he is in better physical shape than most men my age and I do adore him for a number of reasons beyond the sugar.
This brings me to another issue. Where does it say you have to sleep with your baby every time you are together otherwise she's no longer an SB? I would have been screwed in December when I was very sick and The doctor brought me out so he could take care of me. It was physically impossible for me to play that weekend so instead he just wrapped me up, held me, and tried to make the pain go away.
Now, as some have heard me say "off line" maybe you're playing with a different kind of baby and not the type that you'd ever want to evolve to a longer-term relationship in which case you will not experience a girl looking for the above things. Your experience will simply be a sugar baby who just wants the money. Which, is ok if that's what you want, but don't discount Scott's experiences simply because they are different from your own.
As for the not providing sugar each time, it depends on the relationship. I certainly don't require it from The Doctor but what I did learn this weekend is that all I have to do is ask and he will oblige. I'll admit that's probably because I don't ask for a lot at any one time because I look for a long-term gain not short term.
Maybe this only happens when you start to get into the longer relationships which Scott, Nando and myself are in. Several guys on here are looking for that same thing, while others are just having fun playing around with 20 something's and either is fine. As I tell the sugars I coach. Just know your goal and it all follows from there.
If you want a ltr with a bit more educated girl then know your going to have to divulge some real info. We're too smart to put ourselves at risk. If you just want a toy for a month and then to move on, well keep your personal stuff to yourself.
Every sugar relationship is different and we should have fun on here enjoying the variety instead of saying what is or isn't sugar. Just my thoughts, on the topic.
