I don't know the meaning of exotic apparently.
Feeling a need, I called Claire and set an appointment. My hope, based on the ad, her general unattractiveness and advanced age, was that the service would make up for those deficiencies.
She picks up and gives an address, I appreciate that, these girls with their stupid multiple calls like it actually does anything to ward off trouble, legal or not, really get on my nerves. A time is set and it's off to the races. As I'm driving I get another call,"please enter through the patio door" at first this raises my antenna, but I've seen her ad for a while and I know she's affiliated with that other silly girl and figure it has something to do with, so I soldier on. As you will read, this was the first indicator that should have shut it down for me.
I get there and I find an old, morbidly obese, unattractive woman, I don't know why I was surprised, I guess I was hoping the camera was brutal to her but in actuality the camera took pity on her. Immediately she informs me she has a bodyguard in the place. Now I understand her concern for safety and all that but this was the middle of the day, I'm a middle aged non threatening white man with very soft hands, she didn't know that, I get that, but there is something about the tone of the statement, like somehow she expects that I'm likely to be a problem which annoys me but the underlying theme is developing, she's doing me a favor and I'm just a mark to fleece. I'm beneath her. I think for moment, WTF, it's probably one of her dominant friends and as such isn't much of anything to worry about although he might call me names and try to spank me if I get unruly.
She gives the groundrules, nothing unreasonable but really, not necessary and insulting sort of.
She orders me to take off my shoes to walk back which is annoying to me, suppose that she's unstable and I need to make a quick exit, barefoot is a problem but I'm just the mark.
I get to pick what she wears, lovely, of course I'm face down so half the time I shouldn't even be able to see what she's wearing so in the end it's a meaningless gesture meant to give an illusion that I should be grateful for the service.
I lay down, she comes in, she informs me she plays alternative music. I don't have a choice in the matter. This is a reminder of why little things matter, and the music played is not a little thing but sets the entire tone of the session. This is supposed to be relaxing after all and Alice in Chains or whathaveyou, isn't meant to be relaxing. Also the volume was way too loud. At this point it becomes a challenge to endure.
And the massage happens, she claims to be a cmt I think and I guess when she got her training in 1955 this was how they did it. Maybe the problem isn't her poor massage skills but her poor sense of sensuality? Maybe she's trying to be sensuous? Maybe she's trying to be sensuous but can't get past her underlying contempt? Who knows, all I know it was a pathetic rub down with an unbelievable amount of oil / shea butter / something used. Seriously, if I had to go somewhere after I would have explaining to do. Two showers to get rid of the excess.
And it ends, I'm game to try and salvage something from it and the ending doesn't merit a complaint. I knew I was shortchanged on time and still wanted to get out sooner but you know, it's money down, might as well get something out of it and I don't like being rude after all.
I leave vowing never to come back or to have anything to do with these silly bdsm types again they are such a bore. I also vow to go only go legit for massages now on.
I wasn't planning to review but the more I thought about it, the more pissed off I got and if I can save some other guy the fee, then it's worth it. If she reads this she'll know exactly who I am although she only has the burner number, could trouble arise? I was planning on tossing it anyway.
It's this, some girls understand that a service is being provided to a customer and they may lack in the service, at least they have the right attitude. I thought about how I missed Lisa, it ticks me off tremedously when she shortchanges the time so significantly and her crappy places of late, but she has got skills and the right attitude.
Some girls think we the customers are there to provide them the service of giving them money and sometimes an orgasm as well and if we happen to get off, well they'll tolerate that.
Claire is at 1, Lisa goes to 11 or at least she can, she's still a 8 easy in comparison.
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