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[QUOTE=LeiaBaby;3447160]Does anyone know how I can get someone to pay? He dug out and has done it a few times and owes me 900.
I guess joke is on me but does anyone have advice?[/QUOTE]He owed you money before and you still serviced him again. Looks like you should have stopped there and collect first. Oh well.
[QUOTE=LonelySmiles;3447992]Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. As others have suggested if it happens once, at your discretion, it may be a good idea to blacklist that person. If you decide to engage with them again, make sure you require payment in full of anything they owe and your service fee in advance.
In my line of work, we occasionally have to chase an overdue invoice for work that has already been completed. If that client requests any further work from my firm, they are now required to pay 100% in advance.
As Little Dickie suggested below, research standard practices for high end Indy escorts. On the mainland, I believe many independent escorts require the "donation" to be placed in plain sight on a desk or table before the session begins, in particular for first time customers. You have a solid reputation here on Oahu, so that might not be a bad screening procedure.
Guys here on the island are typically trained to not pay in advance at AMPs because it shifts the balance of power and can result in bad service, but I do think the Indy scene has different norms. I almost never paid in advance at an AMP, but I have no problem paying in advance if a girl has a good reputation for consistent service with low YMMV.
Sorry that doesn't help you recoup your losses with this deadbeat.[/QUOTE]And we know why some girls want to be paid up front, because of ASSHOLES like this who spoil it for the rest of us. It really happens a lot I'm told. They know most girls will not call the cops.
[QUOTE=Dacalano;3448085]And we know why some girls want to be paid up front, because of ASSHOLES like this who spoil it for the rest of us. It really happens a lot I'm told. They know most girls will not call the cops.[/QUOTE]Quite many place prefer locals with flip flop that they may confront in safeway.
They prefer safer regulated money to uncertain jackpot (rip off) outsider.
[QUOTE=DeMeter;3448702]Quite many place prefer locals with flip flop that they may confront in safeway.
They prefer safer regulated money to uncertain jackpot (rip off) outsider.[/QUOTE]I was just told this by a provider very recently. She preferred locals in general who were mostly kind, many tourists were demanding and not kind and of course young drunk military were not a preferred customer either.
[QUOTE=HiPickle;3449179]I was just told this by a provider very recently. She preferred locals in general who were mostly kind, many tourists were demanding and not kind and of course young drunk military were not a preferred customer either.[/QUOTE]Let's not forget the tweeked out ones.
[QUOTE=HiPickle;3449179]I was just told this by a provider very recently. She preferred locals in general who were mostly kind, many tourists were demanding and not kind and of course young drunk military were not a preferred customer either.[/QUOTE](Some or many of our lady friends said).
Those unpreferred guys seem to believe they must be treated much better than locals. Believing they really look like australian or mainland hollywood stars. Saying "you enjoy me much too" . ?? Huh?
Arrogant acting, too demanding, trying to ripping off without feeling sorry at all.
I totally understand some girls just did poor service to them or ask upfront charge while they are usually very good to locals.
Karma.
[QUOTE=DeMeter;3449511](Some or many of our lady friends said).
Those unpreferred guys seem to believe they must be treated much better than locals. Believing they really look like australian or mainland hollywood stars. Saying "you enjoy me much too" . ?? Huh?
Arrogant acting, too demanding, trying to ripping off without feeling sorry at all.
I totally understand some girls just did poor service to them or ask upfront charge while they are usually very good to locals.
Karma.[/QUOTE]Nah winnah, brah! You don't eeeeevvvveeeeennn knnnnoooow! Because I Get pics GALORE! Some guys will send pictures of either themselves or their boto's! Like really. O_O Aye! Pau that kine! (Thank you BTW to those of you that do that. It's a great laugh, helps to weed and seed through the fuckery!) But yes newbies. Don't do that! Don't send pics of yourself like your the "rock" because winnah all you going end up with is a sock called "Fifi". You don't want Fifi. Too much some peoples children. Hahahahha.
Xoxoxo JD.
I just wonder how will it be being a male mamasan who is surrounded half-naked pretty ladies all day and chit chat with them.
[QUOTE=DeMeter;3450747]I just wonder how will it be being a male mamasan who is surrounded half-naked pretty ladies all day and chit chat with them.[/QUOTE]I don't know about papasans, other than Steve back at Empire, but I was told of one former male owner who used his status as owner to pressure girls working at his AMP into free sessions.
Fortunately, some of the girls had the wherewithal to tell him "No. ".
[QUOTE=DeMeter;3450747]I just wonder how will it be being a male mamasan.[/QUOTE]Perhaps get pinned with the "Promoting Prostitution" charge when the time comes.
' A line in a popular song states "Respect is just the minimum. " I appreciate clients who enter and as part of their greeting present the envelope and confirm "is this where I should set this? They don't need to be asked. In my opinion this is a person who has a personal standard for behavior independent of other people's actions.
I have heard "approach determines response," but I am a strong willed person. Approach might influence my response, but I determine my response. Whenever I want a service (for example, I don't drive), I always pay what I promised and I do so without anyone having to ask. My word is my bond and I am being the person I want to be. Another advantage is that since I kept my end of the deal, I am comfortable expecting the good service I have paid for and I don't feel unreasonably demanding.
Unfortunately though I offer an example of how I want to be treated I don't always get the quality of service I deserve. I might have to say something if I have a request unique to me, but if I have to ask for minimal respect (please put down your phone, for example), I am not ok with that substandard behavior. My opinion of the quality of service is reflected by the tip (or lack of tip! My repeat business, and my recommendation to others.
I also make sure that if I am in a store I write a commendation for the manager to place in an especially helpful employee's file. I was honored to assist someone receive a well deserved promotion because my commendation letter was taken into consideration.
In this world a hobbyist knows that the appointment takes provider time, and there should be an automatic compensation for this time. An upfront compensation tells me the client has at least minimum respect for me and for himself and reasonably expects reciprocity. As a mature provider I know clients have their reasons for donation timing and their experience based decisions are legit even if ' they differ from my preferences. The quality of the time I spend is never affected by someone else, because now my convictions are too solid. I am flexible to promote client comfort, especially with established people. People are honest more often than not. When I experience the "not" it really sucks. I understand that there is always a chance that as a lone woman an encounter, even with a long term companion, might end unfairly for me and there won't be a thing in the world I can do bc I it is unwise for this small female to engage in combat with the opposite sex. All I can say "is oh well. " Then I shake it off so as not to unfairly suspect the next person of wanting to rip me off.
Let's face it, on both sides we have all been negatively impacted by people who have done us wrong. Yes, give the minimum with the full knowledge that there is a risk of loss that the Better Business Bureau won't remedy. If service isn't satisfactory a client has a remuneration redy and need not feel helplessly ripped off because that's where the tip comes in--or doesn't. Even an unsuccessful encounter should not be a total loss for either party.
The client's automatic offer of the envelope, the best service a provider can give-those are the minimums. The client and provider have absolute discretion to give nothing more or a lot more bc such is the hobby we signed up for.
[QUOTE=LonelySmiles;3447992]Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. As others have suggested if it happens once, at your discretion, it may be a good idea to blacklist that person. If you decide to engage with them again, make sure you require payment in full of anything they owe and your service fee in advance.
In my line of work, we occasionally have to chase an overdue invoice for work that has already been completed. If that client requests any further work from my firm, they are now required to pay 100% in advance.
As Little Dickie suggested below, research standard practices for high end Indy escorts. On the mainland, I believe many independent escorts require the "donation" to be placed in plain sight on a desk or table before the session begins, in particular for first time customers. You have a solid reputation here on Oahu, so that might not be a bad screening procedure.
Guys here on the island are typically trained to not pay in advance at AMPs because it shifts the balance of power and can result in bad service, but I do think the Indy scene has different norms. I almost never paid in advance at an AMP, but I have no problem paying in advance if a girl has a good reputation for consistent service with low YMMV.
Sorry that doesn't help you recoup your losses with this deadbeat.[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=DeMeter;3450747]I just wonder how will it be being a male mamasan who is surrounded half-naked pretty ladies all day and chit chat with them.[/QUOTE]It would like being a life guard at Waikiki Beach.
I been reading the posts since Leia reported that her client skipped out on her and it's been interesting reading how it went from helpful tips to locals are awesome and outsiders are scum. Liars and cheaters are just that and it isn't a thing that is confined to just the mainland. They have them here also and they are not all imported. As to the issue of guys thinking they are kings, that's probably pretty accurate. But if they were rockstars in real life they probably wouldn't be in this hobby. Part of this thing is fantasy. I mean, where else can I meet a girl and within minutes be doing some of the things we do? I do a lot of research on the ladies that I choose to see because I like to know exactly what I am getting myself into. Some do not and end up being rude or assholes to the providers. That sucks for them but hobbyist feel the same way when a provider misrepresents themselves. In the end I think it balances out but hopefully I'm wrong and their are more good ones than bad ones out there. Not trying to start an argument just giving a different opinion on the subject from someone who doesn't consider himself as a local.
[QUOTE=LightBringer;3445198]The sex trade is the valley of broken dolls. Not just the working girls, but the clientele too. Some find ways to compensate for the fault lines of their soul and lead a reasonable life and manage a network of healthy relationships, but that is rare or short-lived. Tread lightly, and do not linger too long if you cannot compartmentalize this part of your life.
And if you do get into a relationship, don't try to be a savior. You will just get yourself crucified.[/QUOTE]Brother Light Bringer's words are no doubt just the tip of the iceberg as to how many tortured stories are behind what he says and into how many dimensions what he says is absolutely, painfully true. And I'm not here to dispute this brother, but rather to present an additional perspective for consideration.
It's my impression, and also my fantasy, not all of the women working as providers in this town are "broken dolls". Some are highly intelligent, emotionally mature people who offer our world an essential skill, which is to assist men in our time to heal our "broken" and excruciatingly dysfunctional sexuality. In another world, in an alternate universe long ago and far far away, maybe, just maybe, instead of a guy getting into a relationship with a provider out of the conviction he had to somehow fix her, be her "savior", instead he would know she didn't need saving, that she totally had her act together, and further more, rather than her needing fixing, that he'd be doggoned PROUD of his woman, honored to be with her for who she is and the work she does; the service to humanity she brings forth out of her heart and body. And in this fantasy world, if those two honestly fell head over heels in love. This customer and this provider. And discovered a deep and enduring trust in each other, instead of having to move some place where no one knew who she was, and having to come up with some bogus explanation for how the two of them met, this guy would be thrilled, pleased and happy to tell his friends, "Yes! My woman is a professional prostitute (no euphemisms such as 'provider' required)!" He'd be so gosh-darned proud of her that he'd WANT his friends and relatives to know all about the love of his life. Sounds crazy, right? Yeah, well, this is the way real change always happens, through first being willing to entertain new and perhaps outrageous ways of looking at our world and culture. And maybe the turning point for this change will only come when a guy who has been fortunate enough to find himself in such a beautiful relationship decides to dig deep in his guts for the raw courage, wild fortitude, full-on balls, to stand by his woman and say, "Yes, My woman IS a professional prostitute and I'm damned PROUD of who she is and how she has freely chosen to conduct her life in this world!" This fantasy I've just articulated is not insanity. Rather, it is insanity our world is so traumatized and terrified of human sexuality that this sort of thing is NOT considered acceptable behavior and the norm in our time on this tiny remote planet way out on the trailing edge of the great Milky Way Galaxy.
[QUOTE=CosmicKid;3452260]Brother Light Bringer's words are no doubt just the tip of the iceberg as to how many tortured stories are behind what he says and into how many dimensions what he says is absolutely, painfully true. And I'm not here to dispute this brother, but rather to present an additional perspective for consideration.
It's my impression, and also my fantasy, not all of the women working as providers in this town are "broken dolls". Some are highly intelligent, emotionally mature people who offer our world an essential skill, which is to assist men in our time to heal our "broken" and excruciatingly dysfunctional sexuality. In another world, in an alternate universe long ago and far far away, maybe, just maybe, instead of a guy getting into a relationship with a provider out of the conviction he had to somehow fix her, be her "savior", instead he would know she didn't need saving, that she totally had her act together, and further more, rather than her needing fixing, that he'd be doggoned PROUD of his woman, honored to be with her for who she is and the work she does; the service to humanity she brings forth out of her heart and body. And in this fantasy world, if those two honestly fell head over heels in love. This customer and this provider. And discovered a deep and enduring trust in each other, instead of having to move some place where no one knew who she was, and having to come up with some bogus explanation for how the two of them met, this guy would be thrilled, pleased and happy to tell his friends, "Yes! My woman is a professional prostitute (no euphemisms such as 'provider' required)!" He'd be so gosh-darned proud of her that he'd WANT his friends and relatives to know all about the love of his life. Sounds crazy, right? Yeah, well, this is the way real change always happens, through first being willing to entertain new and perhaps outrageous ways of looking at our world and culture. And maybe the turning point for this change will only come when a guy who has been fortunate enough to find himself in such a beautiful relationship decides to dig deep in his guts for the raw courage, wild fortitude, full-on balls, to stand by his woman and say, "Yes, My woman IS a professional prostitute and I'm damned PROUD of who she is and how she has freely chosen to conduct her life in this world!" This fantasy I've just articulated is not insanity. Rather, it is insanity our world is so traumatized and terrified of human sexuality that this sort of thing is NOT considered acceptable behavior and the norm in our time on this tiny remote planet way out on the trailing edge of the great Milky Way Galaxy.[/QUOTE]After talking to many of these girls, I have come to the conclusion that a very percentage of the most popular girls are simple nymphos who enjoy what they do. Several girls have said, "I love my job".