"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

I am wondering if it is possible to do Skype with a POT without revealing any identity info. I have searched for info on the same (here and elsewhere) without success. Does using a proxy server do it? I found this info on Reddit: is it right, and if it is, can someone translate?

Hop on a VPN, create account (use mullvad vpn if you want), download Skype, route it over TOR socks proxy (see advor), now your account was created over VPN's, now you login to Skype over the TOR exit nodes, and when you hit new identity, your Skype will disconnect, and it'll reconnect once you are on a new tor exit node. Simple, simple to do. I do it all the time.

I'm in the exact same boat. After having paid subscription for some time I've collected more contacts and phone numbers that I could possibly handle for next few months. I did not renew my paid subscription. However, when I click the "Interests" button SA displays that I could 'send message' to SBs that have viewed me. I have sent messages to several such SBs with a simple message that I'm interested in their profile and encouraged them to text me directly. But I haven't received any text messages until now as an outcome of my messages. So I'm guessing it is just a gimmick by SA.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3062709]I don't have a paid membership right now. I got on briefly and favorited someone, and she favorited me back. I think she is a premium member. There was a message bar on her icon that said 'it's a match!' and 'send a message'. I clicked it and a messaging window opened up, so I was able to type something in there and apparently send it off. It included my email so I could communicate with her off the site. I haven't heard from her and wonder if anyone else has had similar experience. Do you think SA is holding up the message b / c it includes my email (that happened to me when I first joined the site, before I paid)? Or do you think I was mistaken that I could communicate with her even though I currently don't have a paid membership? My message is definitely not in my 'sent' box.[/QUOTE]

OhBabe1 25, cute blonde model wanted to be my sex buddy but I had to get Safe Sex I'd through AFF. Enter her user name and pay $30 for Gold membership.

[QUOTE=Lebruno;3069644]I'm in the exact same boat. After having paid subscription for some time I've collected more contacts and phone numbers that I could possibly handle for next few months. I did not renew my paid subscription. However, when I click the "Interests" button SA displays that I could 'send message' to SBs that have viewed me. I have sent messages to several such SBs with a simple message that I'm interested in their profile and encouraged them to text me directly. But I haven't received any text messages until now as an outcome of my messages. So I'm guessing it is just a gimmick by SA.[/QUOTE]I spoke with the woman in question and she never received either of the messages I sent this way (not the same as the regular portal), with and without my email.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3069639]I am wondering if it is possible to do Skype with a POT without revealing any identity info. I have searched for info on the same (here and elsewhere) without success. Does using a proxy server do it? I found this info on Reddit: is it right, and if it is, can someone translate?

Hop on a VPN, create account (use mullvad vpn if you want), download Skype, route it over TOR socks proxy (see advor), now your account was created over VPN's, now you login to Skype over the TOR exit nodes, and when you hit new identity, your Skype will disconnect, and it'll reconnect once you are on a new tor exit node. Simple, simple to do. I do it all the time.[/QUOTE]From a technical standpoint I don't see a real challenge, except that since Skype now operates with MS accounts, and MS accounts have some of the most stringent security in the business, you may run into issues with VPN locations unless you're diligent about using the same one. By that I mean if your VPN says you're in NYC, and you're really in Vegas, and you log into Skype with the VPN at noon then forget to login through the VPN (or your VPN provider switches locations) an hour later, automated security measures will likely pick up that it's not possible to be in two places at the same time and thus assume its unauthorized access, requiring you to go through sending a code via email or text to unlock your account. A minor inconvenience but it can be a pain.

The bigger concern that would give me pause is that even if she's not particularly technical, its easy for her to capture you in all your glory conversing with her for future evidence, blackmail, social media circulation, etc. A video of you sugaring is even more incriminating than phone calls or text, and impossible to deny its you. Not only that, but facial recognition is the new form of fingerprinting, so any sort of video chat could come back to haunt you later on and is probably a bad idea for married guys. I would say this risk outweighs IP traceability as a privacy issue by 100:1.

I had a similar situation once before I got into the Sugar World with a girl who threatened to tell my spouse.

Even though I was not yet divorced, I called her bluff and told her I was already divorced and she was welcome to try. I told her I was sure it would p*ss off my ex-wife, but I was okay with that. LOL.

She backed down and even asked to see me again months later. I reminder her that she tried to blackmail me and I didn't think it was a good idea. LOL.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3069627]At the time, I thought long and hard about some level of confession / prevarication with the SO about what went down. I decided to do nothing and wait (advice from a great friend, who had confessed to me his inability to stay away from a grad student in his department, long ago), and fortunately, she was bluffing so could not follow through on her threat. I did have essentially that explanation at the ready, provided by my more level-headed friend.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=JeezLizard;3070045]From a technical standpoint I don't see a real challenge, except that since Skype now operates with MS accounts, and MS accounts have some of the most stringent security in the business, you may run into issues with VPN locations unless you're diligent about using the same one. By that I mean if your VPN says you're in NYC, and you're really in Vegas, and you log into Skype with the VPN at noon then forget to login through the VPN (or your VPN provider switches locations) an hour later, automated security measures will likely pick up that it's not possible to be in two places at the same time and thus assume its unauthorized access, requiring you to go through sending a code via email or text to unlock your account. A minor inconvenience but it can be a pain.

The bigger concern that would give me pause is that even if she's not particularly technical, its easy for her to capture you in all your glory conversing with her for future evidence, blackmail, social media circulation, etc. A video of you sugaring is even more incriminating than phone calls or text, and impossible to deny its you. Not only that, but facial recognition is the new form of fingerprinting, so any sort of video chat could come back to haunt you later on and is probably a bad idea for married guys. I would say this risk outweighs IP traceability as a privacy issue by 100:1.[/QUOTE]As usual, I thank you for your insightful comments. This *did bring down a certain former congressman from NY.

The gal to which this? Pertains isn't the most savvy with sugaring practices, as she contacted me with her correct full name / email, and googling took me directly to her YouTube channel. No lie! - there, she expounds on sexual activities of young adults and misbehavior by men, while presenting herself in private emails as sexually adventurous. At least I know her photo is real. I have some time before I am in her city. We will see how the communication goes in the meantime.

[QUOTE=Madaboutmax;3070082]I had a similar situation once before I got into the Sugar World with a girl who threatened to tell my spouse.

Even though I was not yet divorced, I called her bluff and told her I was already divorced and she was welcome to try. I told her I was sure it would p*ss off my ex-wife, but I was okay with that. LOL.

She backed down and even asked to see me again months later. I reminder her that she tried to blackmail me and I didn't think it was a good idea. LOL.[/QUOTE]I just want to emphasize how important it is to have a plausible deniability / stonewalling approach to the SO, when confronted with suspicion or even evidence. There is nothing to be gained by coming clean, to be honest. There will be momentary relief I assume, followed by perennial suffering. This has been written about elsewhere on these threads earlier but bears repeating. SOs, particularly those that have some level of dependency on us (mostly emotional and / or financial) don't really want to face the reality of the loss of the relationship. They will sometimes rationalize that there really isn't proof, perhaps I am being unfair / too suspicious, etc. , helping us off the hook. The plausibility of the explanation is key to exploiting this weakness. Never, never, never admit to anything. Even when caught (happened to a brother recently), he remained silent and let his SO do the talking. She was most offended b / c the baby was 20 and their daughter was 27. Nothing he could do or say to fix that, so he didn't. A little like taking the 5th or using your Miranda rights.

[QUOTE=CephlapodLove;3068856]That "con" only works as long as you let yourself be vulnerable. She is doing extortion or blackmail which I believe are felonies. "Dating" if something illegal was done, is a misdemeanor. So if you have to trade charges, she gets the heavy weight and you take a slap on the wrist. These girls work off of your fear. The more fear they can smell the harder they will push and keep pushing. But usually if you take a stand and push back you call their bluff!

If you really think she is going to call the SO, inoculate yourself by telling the SO a story about meeting a girl in a bar, conference, etc whatever and giving her your business card. Then next thing you know she is making up stories and threatening to call the SO. But hey, if she can go to the SO with texts from your personal number, emails from your personal account and pictures you sent her. Then you are cooked.

Get a burner number, and layer a GV number on it. Meet in public to size her up and come to an agreement. NEVER be unwilling, afraid or to horny to WALK AWAY if something doesn't feel right!

A lot of The Rules for BP Mongering are applicable to this situation. Have those down cold.[/QUOTE]Something very similar happened to me in the early stages of my Sugar Life. I had a single off-site email exchange with a POT through my Sugar Email, and she informed me that she had hacked into my computer, discovered my real name and where I lived, and was going to send my SO a letter detailing our conversation if I didn't pay her $750 via Western Union. Of course my bowels turned to ice, but the more I thought about it, the less plausible her story became.

I too went on the offense, and replied that while cheating on one's wife is maybe not the nicest thing to do, it was not a crime, whereas blackmail, extortion and wire fraud, all of which she had committed and provided me proof of in the current email chain, are in fact felonies, and would involve the FBI coming looking for her, something they could do in 2 mouse clicks. I had no idea if any of that last part was true or not, but I heard nothing more from her.

To this day, I"m not at all sure she was even an SB. It could have been some Eastern European dude with fake pics. Her "profile" disappeared immediately, which is how I knew I was in the clear, but I have to be honest and admit that I spent several terrified days there! It obviously didn't stop me from this fantastic game, but it did make me a lot more cautious and to trust my gut more. If something feels wrong to me now, I just back away. There are always more little fish signing up every day!

Tall ho!

Scott.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3070243]As usual, I thank you for your insightful comments. This *did bring down a certain former congressman from NY. The gal to which this? Pertains isn't the most savvy with sugaring practices, as she contacted me with her correct full name / email, and googling took me directly to her YouTube channel. No lie! - there, she expounds on sexual activities of young adults and misbehavior by men, while presenting herself in private emails as sexually adventurous. At least I know her photo is real. I have some time before I am in her city. We will see how the communication goes in the meantime.[/QUOTE]I find these girls immediately send me mail revealing their identity and / or main phone number fairly often. The few times I've even brought up the subject, they just say "I'm not doing anything wrong or illegal, why would I hide anything"? I usually don't mention it. When they do reveal it all up front, I interpret it as a good sign because it means #1 they are not a pro, and #2 they haven't yet been jaded by a stalker or a creeper that gave them reason to be afraid. There are also some girls who are far from pros and not jaded or experienced SBs that want anonymity as much as we do, simply because they have a BF or in some cases even hubby that they want to keep aside.

And yeah its insane how much many of them give up about their naughty escapades on social media. When I was young, we lashed out against authority by getting drunk and driving all over the place, screwing girls, getting in fights and other general mischief. I think these days the kids celebrate their youth more through irresponsible use of social media. They know its probably a bad idea and may have future consequences, but hey they're young and you only live once right?

I'm in the greater Chicago area, and the market here sucks. I've met quite a bit of crazy, and some from just even messaging back and forth with some of these girls. This really is weird, I get messages from girls asking me about my experiences in SA and they say it sucks but they themselves are flakes. I've seen so many deleted profiles too people who haven't had accountts forever after some conversation and an arrangement for meet and greet then poof. I may have to strongly consider expanding my search radius beyond 100 miles but that's rough that's really beyond my normal travel distance.

[QUOTE=FarFarAway;3070516]I just want to emphasize how important it is to have a plausible deniability / stonewalling approach to the SO, when confronted with suspicion or even evidence. There is nothing to be gained by coming clean, to be honest. There will be momentary relief I assume, followed by perennial suffering. This has been written about elsewhere on these threads earlier but bears repeating. SOs, particularly those that have some level of dependency on us (mostly emotional and / or financial) don't really want to face the reality of the loss of the relationship. They will sometimes rationalize that there really isn't proof, perhaps I am being unfair / too suspicious, etc. , helping us off the hook. The plausibility of the explanation is key to exploiting this weakness. Never, never, never admit to anything. Even when caught (happened to a brother recently), he remained silent and let his SO do the talking. She was most offended b / c the baby was 20 and their daughter was 27. Nothing he could do or say to fix that, so he didn't. A little like taking the 5th or using your Miranda rights.[/QUOTE][URL]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qjPBMAmNH14[/URL]

"I know you did it, just admit it! It'll be ok!

[QUOTE=Moohk;3071526]I'm in the greater Chicago area, and the market here sucks. I've met quite a bit of crazy, and some from just even messaging back and forth with some of these girls. This really is weird, I get messages from girls asking me about my experiences in SA and they say it sucks but they themselves are flakes. I've seen so many deleted profiles too people who haven't had accountts forever after some conversation and an arrangement for meet and greet then poof. I may have to strongly consider expanding my search radius beyond 100 miles but that's rough that's really beyond my normal travel distance.[/QUOTE]Maybe review your approach. I just started a job in Chicago, and I hooked up with two beauties on my last visit. One tall latina (20) that loved wrapping her thin legs around me all night ($150 for an overnight), and one I'm not going to give details on yet. I'll just say she rivals my pediatric baby in looks but is way more open minded. We've already started discussing a minimal allowance as well as making travel plans.

A pond as big as Chicago is bound to have plenty of fish (no pun intended). If things aren't working, review your profile. Your pics, and your opening. Don't just say "hi how are you". Girls have shown me their accounts, and that's the opening that the vast majority of guys use. Look for something interesting in her profile, or say something funny. Be different.

[QUOTE=FScott;3071275]Something very similar happened to me in the early stages of my Sugar Life. I had a single off-site email exchange with a POT through my Sugar Email, and she informed me that she had hacked into my computer, discovered my real name and where I lived, and was going to send my SO a letter detailing our conversation if I didn't pay her $750 via Western Union. Of course my bowels turned to ice, but the more I thought about it, the less plausible her story became.

I too went on the offense, and replied that while cheating on one's wife is maybe not the nicest thing to do, it was not a crime, whereas blackmail, extortion and wire fraud, all of which she had committed and provided me proof of in the current email chain, are in fact felonies, and would involve the FBI coming looking for her, something they could do in 2 mouse clicks. I had no idea if any of that last part was true or not, but I heard nothing more from her.

To this day, I"m not at all sure she was even an SB. It could have been some Eastern European dude with fake pics. Her "profile" disappeared immediately, which is how I knew I was in the clear, but I have to be honest and admit that I spent several terrified days there! It obviously didn't stop me from this fantastic game, but it did make me a lot more cautious and to trust my gut more. If something feels wrong to me now, I just back away. There are always more little fish signing up every day!

Tall ho!

Scott.[/QUOTE]I was bombarded with phone calls on my burner while I was in a meeting a few months ago. I texted back saying I was in a meeting, and asked who it was. Finally after about 15 minutes of texting, the person at the other end goes. I know what you do. Knowing this was going through GV to my burner, I laughed and said ok what? They replied you meet women for sex. I nearly started to crack-up in a meeting, and replied back. Yup. As often as I can.

I never heard anything more. I suspect someone found my GV number from the AM dump, and was lamely trying to black mail me. Even if they had something (which they couldn't have), I wouldn't have cared. I'm fortunately in a position where there's very little (if any) down side to exposure.

[QUOTE=BikeRider;3071923]I was bombarded with phone calls on my burner while I was in a meeting a few months ago. I texted back saying I was in a meeting, and asked who it was. Finally after about 15 minutes of texting, the person at the other end goes. I know what you do. Knowing this was going through GV to my burner, I laughed and said ok what? They replied you meet women for sex. I nearly started to crack-up in a meeting, and replied back. Yup. As often as I can.

I never heard anything more. I suspect someone found my GV number from the AM dump, and was lamely trying to black mail me. Even if they had something (which they couldn't have), I wouldn't have cared. I'm fortunately in a position where there's very little (if any) down side to exposure.[/QUOTE]I'm pretty much in the same position. I would prefer not to have a SB show up at my front door and make a scene in front of my SO, but it would be far more in the "annoying inconvenience" category than a holy-shit moment. Females have an uncanny radar for male vulnerability -- the more you have to lose, the more they can smell blood on you, and while the reality is most of times it's just threat to give themselves leverage and feed their own needy for a feeling of power, sometimes the looming threat causes more stress than if they just followed through with it. However, since I'm not vulnerable, it's like they all know it, so any sort of evil thoughts along those lines never enter their mind.

The text you got could be an AM related scammer, but the first thought that would come to my mind is a disgruntled former SB or POT that didn't work out, someone that wanted to continue seeing you but you moved on to someone else. She could easily get a disposable number for a few bucks with something like Hushed. An AM scammer would probably have likely (IMO) used a different choice of words if they were hoping to extort, because they would only know you had a membership, not whether or not you actually followed through and met women. If they were even remotely skilled at scamming they would have played the stronger card of just saying they can prove your membership and out you to the SO.