Massage Parlor Reports

[QUOTE=KickKid;1578119]Besides VIP and Bali, what else is there? I don't like going to either because of location, way too sketchy. Or I'm just paranoid.[/QUOTE]Never had a problem with either and never thought of them as sketchy. But then, I usually end up there as a last resort after I've been cruising up and down 1st Ave without any luck. So maybe it just seems legit in comparison.

I don't like that Bali is right there off the Highway. (I think its Bali, I can't keep them straight.) But that's why God gave us baseball caps and sunglasses, I suppose.

The only way I can see running into trouble is if you are partaking of the services when it gets busted. Even then, a clean record and compliant and helpful attitude would probably get you sent on your way most of the time. As far as walking too and from your car, it seems pretty safe to me.

But like I said, my standard for "risky" and / or "sketchy" probably ain't normal.

[QUOTE=Slska20;1576448]Ultimate Therapy I believe.[/QUOTE]I was up in Boaz and decided to call UT and get some info. From what I was told, it sounds completely legit. Complete draping, and a "professional" massage. Really doubt that any extras could be had, including HE.

Yeah, draping was mandatory. Having said that. The massage was outstanding even with no extras.

Broke down and went to Panda last night. Had a girl named "Lenna" or something like that. Cute girl, nice body, very little English. Knows all the massage words such as "too hard", or "where ew hurt?" Beyond that not much dialogue. The set-up with the curtains is weird. I was put in the first room to the left told to undress and all that stuff. Gave her $60 and she came back a little later when I was buck naked and folding my clothes and gave me my change. They don't have too much of a problem with nudity. Every thing as far as the massage was exactly how some have reported. Just a few times grazing the junk. Nothing major. Massage was out of this world. It might have been the best I have ever had. Girl knew exactly what she was doing. Beyond that there was no funny business and it seems there will be none, especiallly with the curtain set-up. The only negative was when I was dressed and recieved my water and was heading out the curtain, she says "what about a tip?" I looked at her and told her the inly money I had was the $10 she gave me back in change. I ended up giving her that. I wasn't counting on giving her anything. But apparently they expect a tip. I guess that's just me being a cheap ass, but to ask for it was kind of a pisser.

[QUOTE=Spider Man;1579170]Broke down and went to Panda last night. Had a girl named "Lenna" or something like that. Cute girl, nice body, very little English. Knows all the massage words such as "too hard", or "where ew hurt?" Beyond that not much dialogue. The set-up with the curtains is weird. I was put in the first room to the left told to undress and all that stuff. Gave her $60 and she came back a little later when I was buck naked and folding my clothes and gave me my change. They don't have too much of a problem with nudity. Every thing as far as the massage was exactly how some have reported. Just a few times grazing the junk. Nothing major. Massage was out of this world. It might have been the best I have ever had. Girl knew exactly what she was doing. Beyond that there was no funny business and it seems there will be none, especiallly with the curtain set-up. The only negative was when I was dressed and recieved my water and was heading out the curtain, she says "what about a tip?" I looked at her and told her the inly money I had was the $10 she gave me back in change. I ended up giving her that. I wasn't counting on giving her anything. But apparently they expect a tip. I guess that's just me being a cheap ass, but to ask for it was kind of a pisser.[/QUOTE]Broke down and went today around 1:30. Place was hopping but I got right in, last room on left. Got the same older lady as before with a nice body and she smiles a lot. I really wasn't expecting anything other than a good massage and as usual that's all I got. This lady doesn't mind me removing my draping so that's what I do after I turn over.

She brushed the balls a few times and spent much time in the fumunda region but never went beyond. The massage was stellar and I tipped her $40 for a two hour massage. Several dudes came in while I was in session. This is where the curtains weird me out and I suppose discourage happy endings at the same time by the ladies.

I am amazed how many customers are frequenting this place. Surely most locals know the deal but I suppose they are getting all the nearby hotel / motel business. Probably not many repeat customers though. I'm still hoping for that "preferred customer" status.

It was busy when I was there. Too busy matter of fact. It seemed as if there were only 2, maybe 3 girls working. My girl had to leave the room 3-4 times to go talk to customers. That was one of the reasons the asking for a tip wasn't accepted too well by me. And when I left there was a guy sitting in the lobby waiting. They might not have a problem with nudity, but with situations like this and the curtains, there's not any extras to be had I wouldn't think. I wish they would lock the front door when it's full or at least have another door like an AMP. But I'll go back just for the massage.

Who am I kidding, I had no intentions of going back, but I found myself stressed and wanting to let go for a while. So where did I end up, Foot Acupressure in Hoover. So as you guys know, thus far, unless some of you have been holding out, I'm the only one who has had some luck there as far as a handjob goes. Though I didn't have any luck my last three visits, and as noted, I had to wear the paper shorts like everyone else, I went back. I found that they actually have new staff in. However, what still gets me about them is they actually have male employees who greet you and walk you back to the room. To me that's a little weird for these types of set ups. Even weirder, the guy mistakenly takes me into a occupied room at first, thank God they have the lights so low I did not see anything. So in my room I go, and when I first got in, there was no robe or paper shorts to be found. So me and the junk were getting excited to catch a little air while waiting on the masseuse. So she walks in, a older lady, not afraid of the nudity. Which was a good sign, but she did have to get me a robe and paper shorts as required by their heads. I didn't mind, the shirts were given to me brand new with plastic wrap on them. I was excited that the masseuse was older like the one who I scored with before. Maybe 45-50. But this time more fit and very attractive. Not to long afterwards, the shower began, and let me say that she did not let the shorts get in her way at all. The way she was reaching in and out of my shorts with her hands, and the way she was bathing my junk was more of a turn on than what a nude shower would have been. She washed the actually junk several times, from underneath the shorts. After a stellar shower, she dried me off. And asked me to remove the paper shorts. I did, and as I removed the shorts, I tried act as if I was comfortable with being nude in front of her to put her at ease. So we end up in the room, and she gives me the best massage on my back and neck. She speaks English very well. She actually knows more then just mere massage talk" to hard, to soft, medium,"etc. She really payed a lot of attention to my glutes which always feels great. Then on the flip she placed a towel just on my junk but in a way that the head peeked out. I think that was to purposely be able to graze it on the inner thigh massage. And boy did she graze it just right. So now I'm hard as a rock, and what does she do. Some may find this disappointing. Others may not. But she gives me the grease and hints for me to take care of myself. So I go to town on the junk, as she is completely undisturbed, and just massages me like aint nothing going on. She does every thing in her power to make me cum, but in the most legal manner possible. She starts rubbing my inner thighs and last but not least, she stands over behind my head, and leans over to give long soothing stokes from my chest to my pelvis. And while doing this she leans just so her boobs graze me on the face each time. Though they were cover with bra and shirt, it was quite a turn on. Then I released the man gravy, and she smiles, and then grabs a towel and cleans me off. She never asks for a tip. But of course I took good care of her, because I try to get in good to have consistent service. I will definitely go back soon.

And I hope you guys get similar service this time as well, if not better.

And again, I hope this helps.

You magnificent bastard. What the hell. Good for you man. It's funny you talk of the men there. The girl that massaged me was the one working behind the desk when I got there. She walked me back to the room. And when I was leaving I passed another girl (not attractive at all and kind of chunky) leading her "client" in. I don't know what the deal is. Maybe you work there and are just trying to get us poor bastards to spend money there, LOL.

[QUOTE=JodaMan; 1581194]Who am I kidding, I had no intentions of going back, but I found myself stressed and wanting to let go for a while. So where did I end up, Foot Acupressure in Hoover. So as you guys know, thus far, unless some of you have been holding out, I'm the only one who has had some luck there as far as a handjob goes. Though I didn't have any luck my last three visits, and as noted, I had to wear the paper shorts like everyone else, I went back. I found that they actually have new staff in. However, what still gets me about them is they actually have male employees who greet you and walk you back to the room. To me that's a little weird for these types of set ups. Even weirder, the guy mistakenly takes me into a occupied room at first, thank God they have the lights so low I did not see anything. So in my room I go, and when I first got in, there was no robe or paper shorts to be found. So me and the junk were getting excited to catch a little air while waiting on the masseuse. So she walks in, a older lady, not afraid of the nudity. Which was a good sign, but she did have to get me a robe and paper shorts as required by their heads. I didn't mind, the shirts were given to me brand new with plastic wrap on them. I was excited that the masseuse was older like the one who I scored with before. Maybe 45-50. But this time more fit and very attractive. Not to long afterwards, the shower began, and let me say that she did not let the shorts get in her way at all. The way she was reaching in and out of my shorts with her hands, and the way she was bathing my junk was more of a turn on than what a nude shower would have been. She washed the actually junk several times, from underneath the shorts. After a stellar shower, she dried me off. And asked me to remove the paper shorts. I did, and as I removed the shorts, I tried act as if I was comfortable with being nude in front of her to put her at ease. So we end up in the room, and she gives me the best massage on my back and neck. She speaks English very well. She actually knows more then just mere massage talk" to hard, to soft, medium,"etc. She really payed a lot of attention to my glutes which always feels great. Then on the flip she placed a towel just on my junk but in a way that the head peeked out. I think that was to purposely be able to graze it on the inner thigh massage. And boy did she graze it just right. So now I'm hard as a rock, and what does she do. Some may find this disappointing. Others may not. But she gives me the grease and hints for me to take care of myself. So I go to town on the junk, as she is completely undisturbed, and just massages me like aint nothing going on. She does every thing in her power to make me cum, but in the most legal manner possible. She starts rubbing my inner thighs and last but not least, she stands over behind my head, and leans over to give long soothing stokes from my chest to my pelvis. And while doing this she leans just so her boobs graze me on the face each time. Though they were cover with bra and shirt, it was quite a turn on. Then I released the man gravy, and she smiles, and then grabs a towel and cleans me off. She never asks for a tip. But of course I took good care of her, because I try to get in good to have consistent service. I will definitely go back soon.

And I hope you guys get similar service this time as well, if not better.

And again, I hope this helps.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Spider Man;1581596]You magnificent bastard. What the hell. Good for you man. It's funny you talk of the men there. The girl that massaged me was the one working behind the desk when I got there. She walked me back to the room. And when I was leaving I passed another girl (not attractive at all and kind of chunky) leading her "client" in. I don't know what the deal is. Maybe you work there and are just trying to get us poor bastards to spend money there, LOL.[/QUOTE]I have to agree. No one else is having any luck there except this one guy. And it is not like he is getting it consistently. I counted I think 7-8 visits, one HE from granny and one other instance when granny did not seem to mind that you took care of yourself. Ugh. If I want HE I am going to go somewhere I know I am going to get it. You may be the only "lucky" one, but I cannot help but be skeptical.

Thanks to you guys, I was driving through B'ham last night and stopped in Bali and drew Dianna. She is a hot little spinner. I'd say late 20's. Nice C's. She's easily an 8. She has a good attitude but either speaks limited English or has little personality. Pd her the $0. 6 house fee up front. Started with a nice TS. She's fast with that scrubber. Felt like I had been buffed when she was done. Spent a few minutes in the Sauna to dry. Back to the room and face down. She climbed up there with me and is pretty strong for such a little thing. Massage was just okay, but I really enjoyed her climbing all over me while she work. On the flip, I opted for CBJ for $1. 0. She asked for $0. 2 more, but I said that's more than I should pay. But because she is so hot, I gave her all I had. As far as CBJs go, she is really good. Worked hard. Lots of eye contact. Let me play with the kitty (DATY probably available. But I wanted to watch her work!). This part is kind of funny. She started complaining about her mouth. At first, I thought she was just tired of sucking so I told her to just finish me by HJ (which she did. Very well). After we were done, she said something like, next time HJ or everything. That I was too big for her mouth. My misunderstanding of her earlier "complaint" and that she tried complimenting my size (which is a joke. I'm an avg white guy at best) , made me laugh out loud. I had a great time with a hot asian chick. The only reason I opted for less than full service is that I had been on the road for about 12 hours and had 5 more. Needed to save my strength.

Good hunting,

Jethro

I guess the way to do it is to ask if it's possible to get an older lady to rub you down. The one thing about this place that they do, and it's something I've never encountered, is how low they turn the lights down in the room. I don't doubt that there can be some shenanigans with the right person. We've all been to legit and not so legit places. The legit places aren't giving you table showers and scrubbing inside your shorts. Nor are they letting you go undraped. As I said way back the one time I went to that Stellar Massage in Hoover (for legit purposes) I was wrapped up like a mummy. The only skin that was showing was the area she was working on.

[QUOTE=Amped Up;1581643]I have to agree. No one else is having any luck there except this one guy. And it is not like he is getting it consistently. I counted I think 7-8 visits, one HE from granny and one other instance when granny did not seem to mind that you took care of yourself. Ugh. If I want HE I am going to go somewhere I know I am going to get it. You may be the only "lucky" one, but I cannot help but be skeptical.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Spider Man;1582082]I guess the way to do it is to ask if it's possible to get an older lady to rub you down. The one thing about this place that they do, and it's something I've never encountered, is how low they turn the lights down in the room. I don't doubt that there can be some shenanigans with the right person. We've all been to legit and not so legit places. The legit places aren't giving you table showers and scrubbing inside your shorts. Nor are they letting you go undraped. As I said way back the one time I went to that Stellar Massage in Hoover (for legit purposes) I was wrapped up like a mummy. The only skin that was showing was the area she was working on.[/QUOTE]The Foot Accupressure place in Hoover is about 500 yards from the front door of the Hoover PD. I will almost guarantee nothing is going on. EVER. Went there once, and it was quite obvious that no shenanigans were to be had.

[QUOTE=Spider Man;1582082]I guess the way to do it is to ask if it's possible to get an older lady to rub you down. The one thing about this place that they do, and it's something I've never encountered, is how low they turn the lights down in the room. I don't doubt that there can be some shenanigans with the right person. We've all been to legit and not so legit places. The legit places aren't giving you table showers and scrubbing inside your shorts. Nor are they letting you go undraped. As I said way back the one time I went to that Stellar Massage in Hoover (for legit purposes) I was wrapped up like a mummy. The only skin that was showing was the area she was working on.[/QUOTE]Hey guys,

Maybe it is luck, maybe it's not. But I did just have my first two in a row there. Nothing too special. But this time I got a shortless shower. And again was given grease to work myself while the massage continued on the inner thighs. And this time it was with another masseuse. Still older. But on arrival I was known and was greeted for returning. Heck during the massage I was shocked to find that my masseuse likes Alabama Football. So as you see. It went well for me again.

Went by Friday before last. Called ahead to make an appointment with Diana. I think I was the only guy in the joint (it was around 9:00). Mamasan sent me straight to the room, so I followed some advice I'd seen here and started getting undressed before she came in. Also put my cash and keys in the little purse. Diana comes in, just as described-tight spinner with maybe C-cups, decent face. I agree with Jethro, she's about an 8/10. Paid her the. 6, and headed for the TS, which was good. Good job cleaning the junk. Dried in the sauna then back to the room, started out face down and she didn't even bother with a drape so I figured things were going my way. She hopped right onto the table and straddled me for what was really a pretty good massage. As she straddled me I stroked her legs a bit, and she didn't mind so I worked my way to her thighs and ass. She seemed to like my hands on her ass-things definitely looking up. On the flip, she just said "Want to play?" I said yeah, and she quoted. 14 which was what I expected. She left the room for a minute, I brought my own condom so I put it on and she came back inside. She whipped her little dress off in one motion and laid on the table. Great body-bolted-on C-cups but I couldn't tell until I got my hands on them. Went mish, doggy off the side of the table, then cowgirl to completion. I'm not 100% sure what GFE entails, but she hugged me afterwards and cleaned me up, then hugged me some more on my way out-she wasn't mechanical or anything.

I'm about an hour away so I don't know when I'll get back up there, but I'd repeat with her.

Has anybody else seen Jessie at Bali? I'd like to compare the two.

Went to the Panda today thinking it could be the magic day and they are closed all week. Some sign on the door in broken English.

So. I decided to hit the Hoover joint across from Crest Cadillac. Someone previously mentioned something about a dude at the door and sure enough a Chinese chubby dude escorted me back to the room. I opted out of the shower as I was clean.

Older short lady comes in and says hello but not much else. I'm draped at this point and face down. I was only expecting a good massage since HE here is the exception rather than the norm.

She started out with a very good massage. Long slow strokes and at one point was on top of me with her knees in my butt cheeks but it did not hurt. She worked the butt very well but no indications of anything further.

I moved the drapery down off my ass so she would know I was cool with whatever.

When I rolled over the drapery went off to the side and I lay on my back as if nothing was out of the ordinary. Didn't seem to alarm her and eventually she covered me up but not very well. Package was hanging out on my left side. I felt the draft. LOL.

As she worked closer up the left leg there was more ball brushing than normal. Much to my surprise she reaches over and gets a handful of that slick shit they rub you with, pushed the drapery off and went to town. I never asked or hinted but somehow she knew.

She told me her name but I cannot remember. It was a short name and difficult to understand at best.

Nevertheless I tipped her well and left a happy customer.

I'm still hopeful for Panda but long as those curtains are up not sure.