Massage Parlor Reports

[QUOTE=GuyMon;7221820]Great checklist! Keep up the good work. I appreciate your posts. What's wrong with free water though? LOL.[/QUOTE]You are a non-senior so I will be friendly.

First off, it is not free. These places have to fucken source those 3 ounce waters from special factories in the hindu kush. You are paying for it.

Second, you need to go to an MP prepared. As Tupac said, do some crunches and wipe your ass. You can have a fucken water in the car. They are rarely offered cold, and if you are the kind of person relying on a water from an MP then I am sure you also count on dropping a load in the bathroom. I had to quit wharf for some time because literally every fucker was "can I use the bathroom first, I just got off work at ralphs and ran over here because I read on USA sex guide that Bella has a big Bush that she lets you finger and I forgot to make pee pee and poo poo. ".

Third, I am sure these ladies talk about us on some forum. I would rather be known as the guy who does not take the water rather than the guy who hit the MP in Lawndale and made the girl cum twice from cunnilingus.

Fourth, where the fuck else have you ever been offered a water on the way out? I run an office. When people come in, I offer them bev. If they are leaving, I do not offer them one for the road, this is not a fucken wagon ride through donner pass.

Fifth, those waters in the 2. 5 ounce size are not even handed out at fucken AYSO youth soccer. If you are in a relationship and have to explain where the fuck you got the water, you would be better off explaining how a president who ordered his FBI to investigate his political opponent fares better historically than a president who was charged, at best, with covering up an unauthorized investigation of his political opponent.

Sixth, my neurotic nature has led me to focus on the most ministerial of details of MPs and there is no greater detail for a nutcase like me standing at a panopticon observation deck than the free water.

[QUOTE=PriscillaM;7221233]So, there seems to be a bit of review culture going on, meaning that I am asked every fucking time I go in and out of these places to review the girl, favorably, and the mamasan and girl asks that too.

So, here is a little guide to a favorable review:

1. no hard masageeeeee. Go soft, and I mean softer than clay Aiken in a titty bar. If I want a hard massage I would be a normie and not a degenerate. If I want hard, you can ask. Unlike word with the shitass calibri font as default, I will never complain about a soft massage being the norm.

2. balls. I did not know until I was like 30 that the balls are essential to fighter pilot training. If I am on my stomach with my ass up, and I do not get attacked, and I mean 3rd I'd combat brigade in Baghdad style, in the ball area, there will be issues with the BBB. I want fondling, poking, caressing, any other verbs you can think of.

3. asshole. There has to be some attention to the boy pussy. I realize that many mongers have the ass hygiene skills of a get out the vote for kamala operation in cobb county, but you can wipe it down if need be. At a minimum, a carefully pedicured index finger must graze the surface of my thermal exhaust port, thereby causing a chain reaction leading to the destruction of the death star. If you want to finger my tuchas, just ask permission. And of course, there is extreee credit for a tongue up there, measured by centimeter.

4. time. The massage part on my back should not last more than ten minutes. Tittie rubbing time, ass fingering, ball juggling and cleaning my mudhole with tongue is not counted against the time.

5. hot towel. If this is done between front and back, the hot towel should be no more than 3 nanoseconds away. At wharf it can be up to a minute and I stopped going due to that bullshit.

6. flip. There is to be no massage on my front at all. Once I am flipped over, other than a body assessment with fingertips, it is dick time.

7. ball work. This is mandatory.

8. gooch work. This is really the key to a great review.

9. blow job. This should be done facing me, side swipe, and in 69. Then I would like to be asked which one I like the most. And that should be repeated. Oh and if it is a CBJ tell me so I can buy a flamethrower.

10. Bush. Many girls are breaking this rule of engagement. This is not porno. This is culver city. There are rules. Maintain a dense Bush at all times.

11. Fucking. Do not suggest positions. I have a list on my Samsung notes.

12. Table. Massage tables are for shit. Red lantern has spoiled me. Even ginja had wide tables. Get them. Or you are killing me larry.

13. Rubbers. Magnums. There is no substitute.

14. Nutting. I sometime cannot nut in the bag. A gentle hand release should be offered.

15. Clean up. Give me the option to clean up the mess in aisle 7.

16. Free water. Do not offer this. Ever.

15.[/QUOTE]Water is not an entitlement. I paid for the water. I'm taking it.

So my adventure this time starts with Beira she was a slender petite girl with a nice but and nice nipple that where poking through her dress to say hello nice to meet you. She had nice hair and look pretty good.

Usually most girls start with a faster BJ to just get you out of there but hers was a little more slow sensual with a decent amount of eye contact and noise to keep you entertained and even had the audacity to ask me if I wanted more, of course I would like more. She had nice small nipples too which I played with the entire time, But you could definitely tell they where sensitive cause she kindly brushed me of when I grabbed her nipple a little too tight (so be gentle).

Today was one of those days I just wanted to just go. And she let me do that she was a little tight. But I don't think anyone has ever complained about that being a problem. But even though she was tight she still let me get in a good fuck All to my pleasure. Which she took the load in her mouth to finish everything off. I can't complain.

New crop of talent at Garden Spa. Today's petite, Chinese treat was Momo. I didn't choose her, she chose me. I was greeted by 2 little baddies, Nicole and Momo. Momo smiled, grabbed my hand, and led me to the fun room.

She is very cute. Mid 20's, slim but not bony, She is sporting a nice set of after-market C-cups. The booty is round. Dyed, yellow hair. The pubes are shaved.

I stripped and waited for a few minutes while she got ready for the massage. The massage was nice. She dug in to find and tight spots with her strong hands, while I stroked her firm legs and ass. She pulled away the towel and gently rubbed her tits on my ass and back. Flip time!

I got on my back and gestured to the cash I had laid out. Enough to get all the extras. She leaned over, grabbed my cock and balls and kissed me with an open mouth. We made out for a little while, and spent some time on those round tits. Her surgeon did a great job–I want to high-five that dude. After she licked me up and down, we ended up in 69 and while that view was great, the dick sucking was even better. She really got into it. I returned the favor by licking her long and slow. She must have just shaved, because there was zero stubble on the kitty. I was in no hurry to stop, since head and pussy are my two favorite things. Momo decided it was go time, though.

She slipped on the cover and bent over the table. I got behind her and slipped it into the kitty. I went at it slowly as I tweaked her nipples. The hottest thing was when she craned her neck back to kiss me and suck on my tongue. From there I scooted her onto the table and fucked her in lazy dog for a little while and kept kissing her. Solid GFE! I could feel the nut building, so I flipped her over and put her feet against my chest and got after it. As I was about to explode, I whipped off the cover and came on her stomach and tits. She giggled at the pool of cum I deposited and grabbed a towel to tidy up.

She cleaned me up with alcohol spray, helped me with my shoes, hugged and kissed me, and sent me on my way. Just a great way to spend 30 minutes! Nicole, you're next.

[QUOTE=FreeDsr13;7222235]So my adventure this time starts with Beira she was a slender petite girl with a nice but and nice nipple that where poking through her dress to say hello nice to meet you. She had nice hair and look pretty good.

Usually most girls start with a faster BJ to just get you out of there but hers was a little more slow sensual with a decent amount of eye contact and noise to keep you entertained and even had the audacity to ask me if I wanted more, of course I would like more. She had nice small nipples too which I played with the entire time, But you could definitely tell they where sensitive cause she kindly brushed me of when I grabbed her nipple a little too tight (so be gentle).

Today was one of those days I just wanted to just go. And she let me do that she was a little tight. But I don't think anyone has ever complained about that being a problem. But even though she was tight she still let me get in a good fuck All to my pleasure. Which she took the load in her mouth to finish everything off. I can't complain.[/QUOTE]She sounds great. What sort of breasts?

First time trying Garden Spa was a really interesting experience LOL.

Made an appt with Sofie but when I got there I was given Momo (Moomo?) she was attractive and wearing a sexy outfit. Thinner with great tits and a nice enough ass. She proceeded to do a lot of teasing while I was on my belly. Lot of oil and attention to my ass and a reach around while I was on all fours. Really hot, I had to ask her to stop so I wouldn't bust there.

She left to get the equipment and came back pretty quickly. I got on my.

Back and she started teasing me right away and then all of the sudden the door opens up and a sexy Asian walks in full of confidence. She immediately starts kissing on my and pressing down on Momo's head while she was sucking me off. I was confused and told Emma (I think was her name?) that I wish I could but did t.

Have any more money and she wasn't concerned at all. Just wanted to help Momo she said.

So I started making out with her and licking on her Incredible tits. Then they both started sucking me off it was Incredible.

I was so turned on I could barely hold back so I asked for the rubber so we could get to the FS. I was pumping away at Momo doggy, nice ass for it, while making out with Emma, grabbing her ass and licking on her tits.

Has anyone at Garden had something similar happen? It was incredible to say the least LOL.

[QUOTE=Ireland1988;7222980]First time trying Garden Spa was a really interesting experience LOL.

Made an appt with Sofie but when I got there I was given Momo (Moomo?) she was attractive and wearing a sexy outfit. Thinner with great tits and a nice enough ass. She proceeded to do a lot of teasing while I was on my belly. Lot of oil and attention to my ass and a reach around while I was on all fours. Really hot, I had to ask her to stop so I wouldn't bust there.

She left to get the equipment and came back pretty quickly. I got on my.

Back and she started teasing me right away and then all of the sudden the door opens up and a sexy Asian walks in full of confidence. She immediately starts kissing on my and pressing down on Momo's head while she was sucking me off. I was confused and told Emma (I think was her name?) that I wish I could but did t.

Have any more money and she wasn't concerned at all. Just wanted to help Momo she said.

So I started making out with her and licking on her Incredible tits. Then they both started sucking me off it was Incredible.

I was so turned on I could barely hold back so I asked for the rubber so we could get to the FS. I was pumping away at Momo doggy, nice ass for it, while making out with Emma, grabbing her ass and licking on her tits.

Has anyone at Garden had something similar happen? It was incredible to say the least LOL.[/QUOTE]Sounds like your "Emma" was probably Amy. She's the boss even though still in her 20's. Easily the most service-oriented MMS ever.

Haven't been there for a while. The dentist has been taking all my 'fun money.'

[QUOTE=Willie23;7223064]Sounds like your "Emma" was probably Amy. She's the boss even though still in her 20's. Easily the most service-oriented MMS ever.

Haven't been there for a while. The dentist has been taking all my 'fun money.'[/QUOTE]Does she typical get involved like that or should I expect that to prob never happen again.

Decided to check out Perfect Massage (El Monte) to see Bella, but it turns out she wasn't available or had already left. Ended up drawing Amanda instead. First thing I notice about Amanda is her huge rack. I'm not that great when it comes to estimating sizes, but I want to say they were at least around size D. Amanda escorts me to the room and I opt to start with the massage. To keep a long story short her massage technique is good but I couldn't stop thinking about her boobs so I opted to turn over early, haha. BBBJ / CG / Doggy. It was fun playing with her boobs while she was on top and seeing those things bounce around in the mirror during standing doggy was hot.

To summarize, Amanda's service was nice and she was attentive throughout the session. Non-rushed session, big boobs. Overall, I had excellent time with Amanda and would definitely repeat.

[QUOTE=LatchkeyKid;7223481]Decided to check out Perfect Massage (El Monte) to see Bella, but it turns out she wasn't available or had already left. Ended up drawing Amanda instead. First thing I notice about Amanda is her huge rack. I'm not that great when it comes to estimating sizes, but I want to say they were at least around size D. Amanda escorts me to the room and I opt to start with the massage. To keep a long story short her massage technique is good but I couldn't stop thinking about her boobs so I opted to turn over early, haha. BBBJ / CG / Doggy. It was fun playing with her boobs while she was on top and seeing those things bounce around in the mirror during standing doggy was hot.

To summarize, Amanda's service was nice and she was attentive throughout the session. Non-rushed session, big boobs. Overall, I had excellent time with Amanda and would definitely repeat.[/QUOTE]Ha -that's literarily the only physical description you gave of her.

After reading the review of Summer, I boned out of work early today and drove out to Lawndale to check her out. When I got there, I asked for her, but she was busy at the moment. A little baddie named Lisa gave me the bad news, grabbed my crotch, and whispered in my ear, "you try me, ok. " OK! When life gives you lemons, you fuck those lemons.

I paid for the 1/2 hour and got myself naked and on the table. Lisa came back in and got to work on my back and legs. Lots of teasing. Then she started to lick my ears. That hasn't happened since college, and I forgot how much I liked it. She could tell that it turned me on, so she kept at it, had me turn over, and worked my nipples and cock with her hands. She slid her body down and basically inhaled my balls while jerking me off. I reached down for those round tits and squeezed them. She slid up and put my dick between those tits and let me slide in her cleavage for a few minutes. Every time the head of my dick emerged, she would flick it with her tongue. Add that to the spank bank.

She grabbed the rubber and said, "you fuck me, ok. " OK again! She sort of backed into me, and I rolled onto my side and got inside of that wet kitty while she was on her side with that smooth ass pressed against my lap. This was nice, and it went on for a little while. Then there was a call in Chinese from outside the door, Lisa said something back, and in came Summer with her dress already around her waist.

She kissed me deep and hard while I kept fucking her friend. Then they rolled my onto my back and each of them put a mouth on one of my nipples. Peak! Then they removed the condom and worked my cock with their mouths from both sides. It was nuts.

The condom went back on, and Summer put her mouth on mine, and Lisa started riding me hard and fast. It was too much and I blew in the bag in about a minute.

Holy shit! I had an extra 50, so I laid that out.

It was kind of a blur, but they cleaned me up and sent me on my happy way. Amazing! I may have to move to Lawndale.

[QUOTE=VulvaNut;7223878]Ha -that's literarily the only physical description you gave of her.[/QUOTE]Amanda has a tight body, manmade D or DD cups, little round butt.

[QUOTE=Ireland1988;7223264]Does she typical get involved like that or should I expect that to prob never happen again.[/QUOTE]Never heard of it happening before, and just went yesterday after reading some new reviews. Guess I was wrong about MMS, as it was 2 new girls yesterday. Looks like no boss on site. Got fantastic service, but solo.

Would love to have a "helper" show up mid-session. I have a feeling you were just super lucky.

[QUOTE=Willie23;7224334]Never heard of it happening before, and just went yesterday after reading some new reviews. Guess I was wrong about MMS, as it was 2 new girls yesterday. Looks like no boss on site. Got fantastic service, but solo.

Would love to have a "helper" show up mid-session. I have a feeling you were just super lucky.[/QUOTE]Happened to me. 2 x. Someone massages, starts doing stuff, someone else comes in, crazy shit happens.

[QUOTE=ImYours;7225231]Happened to me. 2 x. Someone massages, starts doing stuff, someone else comes in, crazy shit happens.[/QUOTE]Do you mean at Garden Spa, or other places? I have experienced at other places- and hear of it often on the Orange County MP board, for example- but haven't heard this before at Garden until the recent post.