Casa De Putas Woodside Sweet Latinas 10/18
I was in the LGA area and I was in the mood so I checked out the Casa De Putas Woodside. When I was outside a Spanish guy with one hand came out the door. I went inside and the madam showed me 1 girl an older girl named Sofia she said she was from Venezuela she told me she is 37 but her pictures on Backpage say 45. I asked the madam if she has a 2nd girl she said yes and XImena came out she has a nice body but her face don't look that good. Ximena is from Colombia and they always advertise her on Backpage. When Ximena came out the other girl Sofia started to pull down her dress and show me her breasts. I guess cause she is older and feels threatened by the younger girls is the reason she acts this way. I decided to check out Sofia from Venezuela. I went in the room with her and she took off her dress and she began to hug me and I began to feel her up and then I undressed. While she was looking for a condom with her back turned I rubbed my Johnson against her ass and she started to moan and began feeling me up. Sofia is about 5'5 light skin almost pale like complexion with long reddish hair with see cup breasts, slender about 120 pounds. I laid on the bed and she put the rubber on and I was rock hard and she climbed on top and I began sucking her breasts and she started kissing me and playing with my Johnson. She act like she was about to start CBJ but then she asks for a tip I told her no. She climbed back on top of me again and I kept sucking on her breasts and she hopped on top and started riding me cowgirl. Her pussy is mad tight for an older women it felt like a glove she rode me for about 7 minutes she was moaning and making a lot of noise. Then she hopped off and we switch to mish and she put me in real good and I began to penetrate her slow and while I was penetrating her I was sucking her breasts as I started to dig in faster and she held me tighter we began to kiss LFK and DFK while I was rapidly penetrating her. She started screaming out loud as I deep penetrating her till I orgasmed and even after I orgasmed she wanted to put me back in but the condom was full of my liquid. After we finished and I put my clothes on we kissed and she ask for a tip and I gave her 10 bucks she asked for more but I told her next time. I told her in Spanish "I am a very poor man" LOLZ Yo soy Pobre. When she opened up the door the madam and Ximena were sitting outside the door probably listening to all the noise in the room. I washed my hands and left the spot. I had a good time and would repeat with Sofia.
At Bigggga, Haven't We All Been There
You go to a provider who claims to be one thing and then find out she's something else. Sorry if this isn't the right place to post or if everybody's already seen this, but I saw this a while ago and actually found it be correct in 90% of instances...
Escort Ad Doublespeak.
BBW = fat.
Voluptuous = fat.
Curvy = fat.
Curvaceous = fat.
Thick = fat.
Rubenesque = fat.
Womanly = fat.
Hourglass = fat.
Supersized = fat.
Pic of face only? = fat.
Pic of body under bedsheet? = fat.
Gives bra size only? = fat.
Busty = either saggy or fat.
Naturally busty = saggy and fat.
Real woman = saggy, fat and ugly.
Slim = no boobs.
Svelte = no boobs.
Slender = no boobs.
Dancer's body = no boobs.
Runner = no boobs.
Spinner = no boobs.
Yoga = no boobs.
Bombshell = fake boobs.
Baywatch = fake boobs.
Playboy = fake boobs.
Model = fake boobs.
Brazilian = black.
Butterscotch = black.
Caramel = black.
Chocolate = black.
Cinnamon = black.
Creole = black.
Cuban = black.
Dominican = black.
Ebony = black.
Egyptian = black.
Eritrean = black.
Ethiopian = black.
Exotic = black.
Hawaiian = black.
Mahogany = black.
Mocha = black.
Mulatto = black.
Nubian = black.
Mixed = black.
Mature = old.
Courtesan = old.
Gracious = old.
Graceful = old.
Refined = old.
Elegant = old.
Classic = old.
Conservative = old.
Original = old.
Soft skin = old.
Age = generally add a few years, here are some frequent exceptions:
College Student = late 20's.
Just turned 18 = mid 20's.
19 = possible jailbait.
21 = late 20's.
28 = late 30's.
No age? = same as "28".
Intelligent = brunette.
Sorority Girl = blonde.
Selective = overpriced.
Exclusive = very overpriced.
Classy = can't afford lingerie.
Freaky = doesn't shower between clients.
Nasty = doesn't shower at all.
Upscale = snooty personality.
All American = all trailer trash.
Princess = I have an attitude problem.
Party girl = I'll be high on drugs.
On fire = active herpes outbreak.
Las Vegas = Bellagio prices, Motel 6 service.
Coed = plain looking with acne problem.
Girl next door = looks like the boy next door.
Goddess = If you believe this is me in the pictures...
Real Doll = Bubba brings you an inflatable doll, no refunds.
Energetic = methamphetamine addict.
Down to earth = boring.
College graduate = sleeps with professors.
Open minded = openly accepts tips.
Two girl show = one girl shows, one girl steals your stuff.
New to business = changed name.
New to area = changed name and moved across bay.
Only here for a few days = staying until bad reviews run me out of town.
Up to an hour = 1 shot and she's gone.
Discreet = I check your I'd.
Discrete = I can't spell.
Advance notice required = you'll never get a hold of me.
Seeks generous gentleman = ROB for the elderly.
Seeks generous businessmen = ROB for out-of-towners.
Once in a lifetime experience = you won't repeat.
I love what I do = I'm desperate for clients.
Satisfaction guaranteed = I guarantee I'm getting your money.
Snowbunny = white girl with a black pimp.
Available 24/7 = my pimp doesn't let me sleep.
AD WRITTEN IN ALL CAPS = my pimp can't type.
AD wRiTTeN iN mIxED cAsE = my pimp is learning how to type.
You won't be sorry = You'll be disappointed.
You won't be disappointed = You'll be sorry.
CMT = good massage, bad sex.
FBSM = bad massage, good sex.
What an ad DOESN'T say, is also a source of information:
Unless specified, you can assume:
Hair color = brown.
Hair length = to shoulder.
Eye color = brown.
Age = mature.
Height = short.
Weight = heavy.
Cup size = small.
Measurements = large.
