"Sugarbabies" / "Arrangements" Amateurs or Not?

[QUOTE=Nice499;2369929]I'm new to this so was looking for some advice. I set a time for a M&G with SB. She responded asking if I would be bringing a donation. Is this typical? Not sure I'm willing to pay anything unless I get ROI.[/QUOTE]When I first started out, I would give a POT a small donation for a M&G. But I've definitely changed my ways since then. I'll pay for the coffee / drinks / meal / whatever. I'll even give some gas money if she drove a fair distance to come see me. But I absolutely will not give a POT some sugar just to come and have drinks or coffee or dinner with me, unless the M&G leads to the FC or I get some sort of sex play out of the date. More than a few POTs have declined to meet me because they wouldn't be getting paid to have coffee with me. Fine with me.

[QUOTE=Nice499;2369931]I had a SA account and was fairly successful making contact with potentials. Was wondering is if any of the other sites (e.g. SD4ME) were worth it.[/QUOTE]A few brothers report that different areas around the country seem to have different success rates with some of the various arrangement sites. SD4 ME seems to have a good selection depending on your location, but frequent reports (my own included) are that recurring billing is very difficult to stop. Take that into account when providing a payment method should you decide to give that site a go. SDToday is a totally free site, but you get what you pay for. I believe a couple brothers have had some mixed results there, myself included. Any other sites are too small or haven't had very many reports given.

[QUOTE=Nice499;2369929]I'm new to this so was looking for some advice. I set a time for a M&G with SB. She responded asking if I would be bringing a donation. Is this typical? Not sure I'm willing to pay anything unless I get ROI.[/QUOTE]Exactly, like you say, it is a meet and greet. Analogy would be an interview. They don't pay you to show up for the interview. I don't think anything is wrong with treating it like it is a casual date wherein you pick up the tab for whatever you do. However, it can be productive as you get to meet each other and if you are to each other's likings, then you can set some guidelines for your relationship at that time.

As things tend to go, one of you or the other may wish to modify from time to time, and being flexible is in my opinion a good thing. But know your limits and respect hers.

[QUOTE=FotoGuy1970;2370259]When I first started out, I would give a POT a small donation for a M&G. But I've definitely changed my ways since then. I'll pay for the coffee / drinks / meal / whatever. I'll even give some gas money if she drove a fair distance to come see me. But I absolutely will not give a POT some sugar just to come and have drinks or coffee or dinner with me, unless the M&G leads to the FC or I get some sort of sex play out of the date. More than a few POTs have declined to meet me because they wouldn't be getting paid to have coffee with me. Fine with me.[/QUOTE]I still laugh that there are women out there that actually want money just to come out and meet you. LOL good luck ladies, enjoy your 6 cats!!

[QUOTE=Nice499;2369929]I'm new to this so was looking for some advice. I set a time for a M&G with SB. She responded asking if I would be bringing a donation. Is this typical? Not sure I'm willing to pay anything unless I get ROI.[/QUOTE]Sometimes you run into the ones that think you should pay them to sit and look pretty. I have never done that. When they request that, I tell them I will gladly pay the expense of the date itself, coffee, dinner, drinks, but I will not pay them for showing up for that. I tell them that I do not pay to sit and talk to them. I can get that at home for free. The sugar doesn't start until the panties hit the floor. They will try and tell you that your investing in a future arrangement. I ask them if they pay to go on a job interview. About half of them go silent at that point. The other half will meet you anyway. The ones that meet you without the sugar are the ones that are serious about an arrangement. The other ones are merely looking to turn you into their personal ATM. For those young ladies, I just say NEXT!

Speaking of that, last summer I me an extremely hot 46 why / o MILF on SA. She lives 2 towns over from me, so it has been very convenient. We had met for lunch at a diner the first date and all went well. She had agreed to FC trips for $150. These were non stop sucking and fucking for the entire 3 hours we had the SS. During the m&g, I had established, and she understood, that I was not going to be her personal ATM. Well, shortly after the first of the year she would ask for an advance. Reluctantly, I did that for her because she was in a tight spot a couple of times. We would meet later in the week at the FC and I didn't have to give her any sugar, so she was making good on it. Now the problem is this is starting to happen way too often. I think I need to cut her loose now as she seems to be turning Nando1 on me. Well, it was good while it lasted. NEXT!

[QUOTE=FyrGuy33;2370593] The other ones are merely looking to turn you into their personal ATM. For those young ladies, I just say NEXT![/QUOTE]Having had an escort try to turn me into her personal ATM, I can certainly relate that 1) nobody likes that, and 2) you don't want to go down that road. They will have no shortage of emergencies that they need a little help with. And they may be true, some of them anyways. But at the very least you have to ask yourself "do I want to have such an arragment with a woman whose life is so full of crisis financial situations and I'm the person for some reason she goes to for help with all of them?

Yeah. No!

On the other hand, you are the sugar daddy and you got to take care of your baby to keep the sugar sweet. I'm fortunate that my lady on the side has other more generous and capable suitors and my relatively small donation helps smooth out the slow times for her.

Well Brothers.

Just an update on life in the bowl in the midwest. Started the year with a 19 yo white 9/9/9. Had been seeing her for months. She developed a serious boyfriend and needed to stop. Left on good terms. Found a 24 yo with small daughter. She is a social worker and in between jobs. She also has her own apartment that we can use! Nice curly hair and banging body. Pretty submissive. Keeps my cock in her mouth a good portion of the time. I started off taking just a couple of pictures with her and offering her the ability to delete them, but on the next date just started videoing her-Wow!! Seemed like it made her more freaky!! I see her every 2 weeks.

Then one day a girl popped up on SA that lived 1 town over. Tall with a nice rack. 19 yo. College student. Took me several try's to get her to respond to me. We started texting each other. Met at a local hotel- no m&g. She is awesome. She very much likes to please and really likes the gifts I bring her-lingerie, panties. She lives with her mother so I have to rent a room, but she has been taking 125 per visit and she sends me awesome pics every week.

So then on my weekly business trip 3 hours away I found an 18 yo. 5'4" 100 lb spinner. We exchanged messages on SA for several weeks and she agreed to meet me for oral sex and a massage. She same to my hotel and we talked for over an hour. She then said we can have sex I know you are not a creep. She is very quiet but was up for anything. I especially enjoyed having her hang her head off the bed and deep throating her! She had never done anything like that. She has had a hard life. Screwed up parents, some sexual abuse, but trying to improve herself and has taken her little brother in to protect him from bad family situation. Next time she said we could watch a movie afterwards and she would spend the night with me.

So I started the year down and depressed because I lost my SB and didn't think it could get any better, and now I have three!! I should probably drop one, but that is a hard choice!!

I know it has been brought up on here before, it is interesting to see the amount of mental illness in these girls. All 4 of the girls I have seen on SA have had depression or bipolar issues, or a bad childhood with some sexual abuse. These factors must somehow cause them to seek out SA or other sites like it. They have all been good girls trying to improve their situation and go to school but just sad to hear their stories.

I love reading other members stories and have learned a lot from this thread!

Someone just thanked me via PM for my 5 step plan. It made me recall my first M&G. I was so nervous driving to the restaurant I got into a car accident on the way there.

So now she has lost her job. We all know what that means. Stixxer is 100% right. She will now up her game on all the crisis in her life. Fortunately I am in Florida until next week so she knows I cannot front her any funds. However, if she doesn't find a job by the time I get back I think I will have to go radio silent on her. Anybody have any other thoughts on this? I'm thinking it's time to move on. She's a fun gal and I enjoy hanging out with her. Sex is off the charts and she is fun to talk to. But. I shopuld probably re-read this thread to confirm that I am on the right track. After all, it's just pussy at the end of the day and I can always find a new one.

Need advice. I stepped my game up and I'm only committing time to girls 8+. I have a M&G tonight at a 5 star dinner spot. She'll likely be one of the most wholesome girls I've meet up with. She ignored msgs for weeks, finally responded and after a few days of chatting on the SA site, we've confirmed a dinner date. Her stats 22/ Mixed / Law School student 10/10/10, says she had a SD relationship before. Her expectations say "negotiable".

In our chats, the convo hasn't shifted to an arrangement or allowance. This is the first girl I'd consider a LTR SB. How do I get a girl like this to drop the panties quickly?

All my past successes or first night BBBJ or FC came after a bar or lounge was involved. I typically wear a suit, no tie, nice cologne and bring a wad of cash to pay for everything. After a couple of drinks we're kissing, petting and things move on quickly. Because this girls temperment has been even and hard to read I don't know what to anticipate.

[QUOTE=FyrGuy33;2371079]So now she has lost her job. We all know what that means. Stixxer is 100% right. She will now up her game on all the crisis in her life. Fortunately I am in Florida until next week so she knows I cannot front her any funds. However, if she doesn't find a job by the time I get back I think I will have to go radio silent on her. Anybody have any other thoughts on this? I'm thinking it's time to move on. She's a fun gal and I enjoy hanging out with her. Sex is off the charts and she is fun to talk to. But. I shopuld probably re-read this thread to confirm that I am on the right track. After all, it's just pussy at the end of the day and I can always find a new one.[/QUOTE]Sometimes these situations provide an opportunity to extend the boundaries of what you can do. Something that she would not put on the table before? Now might be a good time to get it included as part of the deal.

[QUOTE=FyrGuy33;2371079]So now she has lost her job. We all know what that means. Stixxer is 100% right. She will now up her game on all the crisis in her life. Fortunately I am in Florida until next week so she knows I cannot front her any funds. However, if she doesn't find a job by the time I get back I think I will have to go radio silent on her. Anybody have any other thoughts on this? I'm thinking it's time to move on. She's a fun gal and I enjoy hanging out with her. Sex is off the charts and she is fun to talk to. But. I shopuld probably re-read this thread to confirm that I am on the right track. After all, it's just pussy at the end of the day and I can always find a new one.[/QUOTE]Once they crash through the Nando 1 sound barrier there is probably no return. But since she has been such a good provider for you it might be worth having THE Talk. Set the rules for payment only at the time of service and stick to it. OTOH if she has been true to her word and provided when she said she would, and if you do not let her get too far ahead of you it might be worth seeing her through this crisis. I had one like her who I allowed to sweet talk me a little too far ahead. I ended up cutting her loose with $300 unpaid credit. My bad since I let it happen.

[QUOTE=FyrGuy33;2371079]So now she has lost her job. We all know what that means. Stixxer is 100% right. She will now up her game on all the crisis in her life. Fortunately I am in Florida until next week so she knows I cannot front her any funds. However, if she doesn't find a job by the time I get back I think I will have to go radio silent on her. Anybody have any other thoughts on this? I'm thinking it's time to move on. She's a fun gal and I enjoy hanging out with her. Sex is off the charts and she is fun to talk to. But. I shopuld probably re-read this thread to confirm that I am on the right track. After all, it's just pussy at the end of the day and I can always find a new one.[/QUOTE]My advice in this particular circumstance always is to follow your gut and don't advance an amount you're not prepared to lose. I've advanced sugar twice in my entire sugar career. Once to my first legitimate SB and once to a different SB I was seeing at a different point in time. When those particular SBs asked, I felt that they were trustworthy enough and that we had a good enough relationship that I felt comfortable advancing them the requested amount. And both times, each SB made good on making up the advance back to me under the conditions that we had agreed upon. Just go with your instincts.

[QUOTE=FotoGuy1970;2371361]My advice in this particular circumstance always is to follow your gut and don't advance an amount you're not prepared to lose. [/QUOTE]Very true. Once the money is spent, don't count on anything more than you have already gotten. Personally I have lost thousands doing this. I always think of them as investments. Sometimes they pay off and mostly they don't.