The Rat Trap

[QUOTE=Swaganna;2984393]You are just proving yourself to be the jealous liar scoundrel you truly are!! I can take and post pics all day long of my Fabulous granny self but I don't need to!! Pops stealing my car and leaving his written proof was the best thing EVER. No more minions left darlin, I'm not even a provider anymore and you are still ass hurt but I would be to if I had to wake up and look at you in the mirror everyday. Well maybe I will play dress up, I know you love seeing me in my pics!!

Swags.[/QUOTE]Speaking of a delusional tramp. A2 is quick to point out multiple user names as Paige pointed out. You've been called out by a2 haven't you? Funny. I haven't seen Paige listed by a2 anywhere. Could it be that we are real people that have had great experiences by a good provider? That's for the board and the admin to decide. Not batshit crazy. Enjoy your retirement to the trail as a madam. Don't smoke all of Christy's rocks though okay? He needs to sell them to support for grocery bill.

[QUOTE=OldGamer;2984623]It's sad when the admin thinks your a douche. Get over yourself. You're a punk with a keyboard and drugs to give the crack heads on the trail. All this so called "checking into other mongers" is complete bullshit. So I'm calling you out tampon. Show us proof of your banter with Ashley or forever be labeled a lying piece of shit.[/QUOTE]I don't like it when people put words in my mouth. I didn't call him a douche, I said he should mix up his douchebaggery. There is a difference.

A2.

Quick comment on this:

I have been with Ashley in a previous life and she was wonderful.

So even if this review is a fugazi it's not far off from what I experienced.

White knight 4-life bitches!

Now Long comment:

But the true Irony here is when C5 the 'King of Fake' reviews calls out other 'Fake Reviews'.

Gives me such a warm chuckle. 3/4 of his dreams are bartered for illegal substances while the other 1/4 are freebies from offering glowing fake reviews to his sheep. Then the true genius of Christina5 is revealed when after he is confronted. That's when C5 tells everyone to suck his weenee and dirty corn hole. Oh, but the brilliance doesn't end there, no siree, then he wants to sleep with your wife, Whether you Have A Wife or Not! Afterwards he runs off for shelter to kiss the ass of our beloved Swags because apparently she has a whole photo album with pics of his mugshots and push-mobiles that she will release into a BP post at a moment's notice.

Then when we all think he's the biggest douuuche on earth, he goes Keyser Soze on us and breaks out his tender side and starts spilling his guts out with his 'Ode to Brandy. ' Yes Brandy, the 'auschvitz thin' provider who apparently only liked to cuddle (semi-naked) and give mechanical blow jobs. If I'm not mistaken he offered his 'Pimp' hand in marriage to her. The prenuptial's were written up to where he retains all his meager trinkets / contraband, but she gets to keep the (wink, wink) 'gift that keeps on giving. ' I remember when he used to push her around in the Stang and take her mall hopping for a spending spree (OK, nothing over $60) to all her favorite shops. (Forever 21/ Wet Seal) which was quite a nice gesture considering the Stang was firing on only one good working sparkplug at the time. If I'm not mistaken I am almost 100% positive he also took her to the movies to go see 'The Notebook' remastered. Hey, did you do that the 'hole in the bottom' of the popcorn trick? Ahhhh the memories! !

Ya got to luv this bozo.

FYI,

Dear clown show.

I think it's time for a new fake squirting flower. I know Vino and I know FLAdventurer and they are not the same person, but nice try. Now please come home where you belong.

Signed,

The entire cast of Barnum and Baileys.

C5's Idol has Returned!

P iz'fuqn'back G!

. . And now back into retirement.

[QUOTE=Chris5;2984351]Today 18:58 #2509.

BSnow83.

Regular Member.

Posts: 8.

Ashley Monroe / KansasQueen. Stole my ♡.

First, I apologize for this being a long review. I am a long-time reader but new to posting, and some explanation on that end may help make more sense for this initial review of a legitimate provider. I promise that future posts will be frequent and more concise. Also, just have to thank everyone on this board for the abundant info. I have been reluctant to "pull the trigger" on a dream for a while, despite this wealth of knowledge, mostly because personal discretion, safety, and business / community reputation is critical to me. So, thanks to all who post here and, as always, be smart and keep safe! Onto the review of the beautiful Ashley Monroe who helped officially pop my cherry into the real world of this fun hobby!

So, as discretion and safety are my main priorities (aside from a smokin' hot girl who is drug / drama free! I've been stonewalled a bit due to the "reference" requirements by many of the "proven" ladies. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that more than anyone, but it can leave us newbies in a bind sometimes. Reading these reviews, I've been going NUTS not being able to dump my bank account at some of these girls. But, respect the process and be smart I said, which is where I noticed Ashley Monroe (aka KansasQueen) had glowing reviews and the pictures were even better! Plus, while she still does some screening, it is much more manageable and so to any newbies out there--do your due diligence, don't be a dick and respect these lovely ladies, and Ashley is a gem to take the first dive with. She is careful, discreet, safe, no drug / drama stuff, and not to mention super F'in HOT! Pics are spot on, and she sent me a link with a bunch of her videos (link was down, if I get it working and she gives the OK I'll share, but haven't asked her yet).

So, all of this is what I was experiencing in that foggy state before you fall asleep. Once I did fall into dreamland, I found myself entering a very safe incall (safety is critical to me so high standards; I felt perfectly fine). It was a gated community and what would normally have been a standard text /2 call system was made easier by me because I tailed someone in as I was running late by 15 min already (big plus: that was a non-issue with Ashley. Talk about "non-clockwatcher" I'll get more specific in future reviews, I promise, but feel free to PM for any specifics. That being said, showed up to a stunning blonde in a sexy black see-thru nightie. Absolutely made me feel right at home from the instant. Popped the bottle of bubbly I brought, chatted for a few, and even offered me the shower first (at my request) since it was so hot outside and I was rushing to get there. Honestly, maybe because it was my first run, but I really enjoyed just talking with her and getting some of my newbie?'s answered. She was so freakin' hot but also so sweet and adorable, I could totally see just hanging out and chilling as friends. But, business called LOL and clothes came off (came out of shower to her naked on bed!) and her body is stunning with beautiful silky skin. From there, the rest of the reviews are pretty spot on. LFK, not really any DFK though that was probly because I was buzzed and nervous so maybe more next time, and then she slipped the hat on so subtly I didn't notice, so yes CBJ but as prior reviews state it's good for being covered. Then CG and playing / caressing her body getting deep until she laid back for mish (pretty sure she came there) and then up for K9 (def came again I think, or Ashley, you're the best at faking in the world! LOL) I told her that I really wanted to just make her cum especially being my first time, nerves and all, and I think I fulfilled that. All I could think about was that old rap song saying "make that p*ssy fart for the Ying Yang Twins!" LOL.

At any rate, sorry for the long review but it's my first thorough one and also Ashley deserves a major shoutout as far as I'm concerned. Future posts will be much more on point and concise, PM for details. Thanks to you all, and thanks MOST to Ashley. See you next week gorgeous.


Smh.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Chris5;2984135]Pimp Vino and FLA Adventurer are very quiet today! LOL! I guess VINO got tired of using BOTH handles so much yesterday. Smh.[/QUOTE]After finding out that you are a st st st Stutterer, I am having mercy on you.

Seriously, why on earth should I continue to make fun of a really dumb dumb moron that took the short bus when he was in school. You have been made fun of your whole life. Everyone here makes fun of you. Even A2 is trying to coach you a little so you can improve on your banter.

I will check in once in a while just to throw you around a little, my dumb, ugly, fat PUPPET WITH A LISP.

[QUOTE=Swaganna;2984393]You are just proving yourself to be the jealous liar scoundrel you truly are!! I can take and post pics all day long of my Fabulous granny self but I don't need to!! Pops stealing my car and leaving his written proof was the best thing EVER. No more minions left darlin, I'm not even a provider anymore and you are still ass hurt but I would be to if I had to wake up and look at you in the mirror everyday. Well maybe I will play dress up, I know you love seeing me in my pics!!

Swags.[/QUOTE]Paige / Razor / Gamer, you all should give it up, SHE KNOWS!

[blue][Deleted by Admin][/blue]

[b][u]EDITOR'S NOTE[/u]: [/b] [blue]This report was edited or deleted because it appeared to be a [u]threat made towards other Forum members[/u]. Threatening other members in any way, either veiled or directly, is strictly prohibited and will result the the perpetrator being banned from the forum. Please read the Forum's Posting Guidelines for further information. [/blue]

[QUOTE=PharmaGuy;2985038]Quick comment on this:

I have been with Ashley in a previous life and she was wonderful.

So even if this review is a fugazi it's not far off from what I experienced.

White knight 4-life bitches!

Now Long comment:

But the true Irony here is when C5 the 'King of Fake' reviews calls out other 'Fake Reviews'.

Gives me such a warm chuckle. 3/4 of his dreams are bartered for illegal substances while the other 1/4 are freebies from offering glowing fake reviews to his sheep. Then the true genius of Christina5 is revealed when after he is confronted. That's when C5 tells everyone to suck his weenee and dirty corn hole. Oh, but the brilliance doesn't end there, no siree, then he wants to sleep with your wife, Whether you Have A Wife or Not! Afterwards he runs off for shelter to kiss the ass of our beloved Swags because apparently she has a whole photo album with pics of his mugshots and push-mobiles that she will release into a BP post at a moment's notice.

Then when we all think he's the biggest douuuche on earth, he goes Keyser Soze on us and breaks out his tender side and starts spilling his guts out with his 'Ode to Brandy. ' Yes Brandy, the 'auschvitz thin' provider who apparently only liked to cuddle (semi-naked) and give mechanical blow jobs. If I'm not mistaken he offered his 'Pimp' hand in marriage to her. The prenuptial's were written up to where he retains all his meager trinkets / contraband, but she gets to keep the (wink, wink) 'gift that keeps on giving. ' I remember when he used to push her around in the Stang and take her mall hopping for a spending spree (OK, nothing over $60) to all her favorite shops. (Forever 21/ Wet Seal) which was quite a nice gesture considering the Stang was firing on only one good working sparkplug at the time. If I'm not mistaken I am almost 100% positive he also took her to the movies to go see 'The Notebook' remastered. Hey, did you do that the 'hole in the bottom' of the popcorn trick? Ahhhh the memories! !

Ya got to luv this bozo.

FYI,

Dear clown show.

I think it's time for a new fake squirting flower. I know Vino and I know FLAdventurer and they are not the same person, but nice try. Now please come home where you belong.

Signed,

The entire cast of Barnum and Baileys.

C5's Idol has Returned!

P iz'fuqn'back G!

. . And now back into retirement.[/QUOTE]That's was great, Pharm. It's good to have you back for the comic relief. There were some more LMAO posts on here today as well. Nice work, guys.

[blue][Deleted by Admin]

You had to know I was gonna delete this one.

A2[/blue]