Streetwalker Reports

[QUOTE=Rippa;2144433]OK, I'm going to speak heresy here, but WTF is it with you guys always bragging about your mind blowing three-somes? I rarely do them because I always feel like Joe Pesci as LEO Getz in 'Lethal Weapon 2' when he says, 'They always f**k you at the drive-thru!' And it seems I always come up holding the shitty end of the stick whenever I try to pull off a simple' Rippa Sandwich'.

Some time back in a moment of delirium, I guess I must have casually mentioned to my curvy little UTR MILF here in Tampa that I wouldn't mind trying a three-way. Hell, I'd even spiff her a little extra if she could arrange it. Now, this little girl just LOVES freaky, no orifices excepted, full-on monkey sex. Almost as much as she likes my money. So she apparently hopped right to it and a couple of weeks ago she proudly announces, 'Come on in to town, Honey, I found the perfect girl for us!

I was immediately a bit suspicious and started asking some questions:

ME: "Does she like what WE like?" (Including Greek lessons).

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Does she do BBBJTCWS?

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Most important, is she willing to DATY for YOUR enjoyment?

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Hot damn! I'm all in!

Well, you can guess where this all goes. I drive several hours to get here, pick up the girls, and standing there with my little MILF is what I can best describe as 'The Giraffe Woman'. Tall, skanky, OLD, skinny, clearly been on the pipe WAAAY too much. I almost said 'not no but hell no' right there. But thinking maybe my little UTR girl of so many years knew something I didn't, and being the adventurous man of peculiar tastes that I am, we proceeded on to the love nest.

Once we got there, this slow motion train wreck started to pick up some speed. Turns out 'The Giraffe Woman' doesn't really like anal, only 'receives' DATY, never 'gives' it, and couldn't even put a single sexy, seductive sentence together to save her life. I mean even some dirty talk from her seemed to be beyond the pale. Oh, did I mention she also pulled out her TEETH to give me a 'gummy'?

So I essentially wound up 'paying' to have an audience of one watch me pound my little MILF anally. The only pleasure I got from this loser of a girl was actually seeing her wince a bit, watching in rapt horror as I thrust all 3 and a half inches of my manly blue steel deep into the nether regions of my little sweetie. I'm pretty sure I even had an evil smirk on my face, glancing her way as I exploded into a crescendo at the finale!

So as I dropped off my gal (after depositing the G-W elsewhere first) I thanked her for trying, and tipped her off with just a little more than usual. I didn't lecture or get mad. Didn't need to, as she was clearly mortified at the poor performance of her new found partner. All she quietly could say was, 'I promise to do a better job of screening next time. '.

I also would like to take the time right now to officially blame Boston Amanda for this entire fiasco. If she hadn't gone MIA a while back, and I could have found HER last night instead, none of this would have happened, I'm sure.

But fellas, really, four or five years from now after I've gotten over the emotional scars of yet another Three-Some Disaster, and bring up the idea once more, would one of you do me a favor and just give me a swift kick in the nuts?

--- Rippa[/QUOTE]Sorry to hear about your bad experience. As you can see from some of my posts in the photo gallery, I enjoy threesomes and have them quite often. (If only I had pics of MJ and her friend Angela) I don't TRY to set them up, it just happens. In my last post in the photo gallery, Daisy was there also but was in the shower when I was doing Stacy and Jessica. I did her later when she got out so I can't call it a true foursome.

[QUOTE=Rippa;2144433]OK, I'm going to speak heresy here, but WTF is it with you guys always bragging about your mind blowing three-somes? I rarely do them because I always feel like Joe Pesci as LEO Getz in 'Lethal Weapon 2' when he says, 'They always f**k you at the drive-thru!' And it seems I always come up holding the shitty end of the stick whenever I try to pull off a simple' Rippa Sandwich'.

--- Rippa[/QUOTE]No offense to Spooner, but I have to agree with Rippa. I've done three professional threesomes, and they have been pretty disappointing. Spooner has some sort of crazy luck, though, bc I don't see these ladies on the street as often as he posts.

[QUOTE=Rippa;2144433]OK, I'm going to speak heresy here, but WTF is it with you guys always bragging about your mind blowing three-somes? I rarely do them because I always feel like Joe Pesci as LEO Getz in 'Lethal Weapon 2' when he says, 'They always f**k you at the drive-thru!' And it seems I always come up holding the shitty end of the stick whenever I try to pull off a simple' Rippa Sandwich'.

Some time back in a moment of delirium, I guess I must have casually mentioned to my curvy little UTR MILF here in Tampa that I wouldn't mind trying a three-way. Hell, I'd even spiff her a little extra if she could arrange it. Now, this little girl just LOVES freaky, no orifices excepted, full-on monkey sex. Almost as much as she likes my money. So she apparently hopped right to it and a couple of weeks ago she proudly announces, 'Come on in to town, Honey, I found the perfect girl for us!

I was immediately a bit suspicious and started asking some questions:

ME: "Does she like what WE like?" (Including Greek lessons).

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Does she do BBBJTCWS?

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Most important, is she willing to DATY for YOUR enjoyment?

UTR: "Yes, it's her favorite. ".

ME: "Hot damn! I'm all in!

Well, you can guess where this all goes. I drive several hours to get here, pick up the girls, and standing there with my little MILF is what I can best describe as 'The Giraffe Woman'. Tall, skanky, OLD, skinny, clearly been on the pipe WAAAY too much. I almost said 'not no but hell no' right there. But thinking maybe my little UTR girl of so many years knew something I didn't, and being the adventurous man of peculiar tastes that I am, we proceeded on to the love nest.

Once we got there, this slow motion train wreck started to pick up some speed. Turns out 'The Giraffe Woman' doesn't really like anal, only 'receives' DATY, never 'gives' it, and couldn't even put a single sexy, seductive sentence together to save her life. I mean even some dirty talk from her seemed to be beyond the pale. Oh, did I mention she also pulled out her TEETH to give me a 'gummy'?

So I essentially wound up 'paying' to have an audience of one watch me pound my little MILF anally. The only pleasure I got from this loser of a girl was actually seeing her wince a bit, watching in rapt horror as I thrust all 3 and a half inches of my manly blue steel deep into the nether regions of my little sweetie. I'm pretty sure I even had an evil smirk on my face, glancing her way as I exploded into a crescendo at the finale!

So as I dropped off my gal (after depositing the G-W elsewhere first) I thanked her for trying, and tipped her off with just a little more than usual. I didn't lecture or get mad. Didn't need to, as she was clearly mortified at the poor performance of her new found partner. All she quietly could say was, 'I promise to do a better job of screening next time. '.

I also would like to take the time right now to officially blame Boston Amanda for this entire fiasco. If she hadn't gone MIA a while back, and I could have found HER last night instead, none of this would have happened, I'm sure.

But fellas, really, four or five years from now after I've gotten over the emotional scars of yet another Three-Some Disaster, and bring up the idea once more, would one of you do me a favor and just give me a swift kick in the nuts?

--- Rippa[/QUOTE]It all depends. I've had awesome mind blowing 3 somes and awful ones. Of course 1 hour is just not enough for me to truly enjoy a 3 some. I need several hours. The best 3 somes were when I really knew the girls, and the girls were already really into each other. It also helps if we have been partying together first. I did this recently, we were partying at my place, then started getting more comfortable, clothes started coming off, then we all took turns massaging each other (2 on 1) before things really started cooking. I've also had 3 somes with my wife and a working girl before, quite awesome.

One time in Tijuana at a brothel / house party went really crazy and had 4 girls at once, just a mass of slithering flesh everywhere. In between nuts I would have a seat, drink a beer have a smoke and just watch the girls playing with each other. I miss Mexico!

Then there are the shitty ones where the girls don't touch each other, rush you, etc. It's a crapshoot, that I don't normally do with just any 2 girls who advertise.

Anyone know anything about. Her? I seen her on 140 riding a bike wearing a black dress.

[QUOTE=JohnJon;2144912]Anyone know anything about. Her? I seen her on 140 riding a bike wearing a black dress.[/QUOTE]Reddish hair, 30's? If one I know then yes I would recommend.

[QUOTE=Torin131;2144544]No offense to Spooner, but I have to agree with Rippa. I've done three professional threesomes, and they have been pretty disappointing. Spooner has some sort of crazy luck, though, bc I don't see these ladies on the street as often as he posts.[/QUOTE]It's not like I go "Hey!. You and you hop in, I want to go have a threesome" It's more like "Hey Steph, who is that girl I saw back there" "Oh, that's so and so, you want me to see if she wants to come with us? Give me an xtra. 20 and I'll get her to go" Or "Hey, that was my friend so and so on the phone, if You go get her and get us some candy we'll come back and have some fun" I'd guess in the last 15 yrs I've had about a dozen 3 ways (more if you count the same two girls each time as one) a couple of times when this girl kathy I know was with me, a girl off the street just walked right into my shop. What I'm trying to say is that I can't "plan" a threesome, it just falls into place when it does.

[QUOTE=LSpooner;2145266]It's not like I go "Hey!. You and you hop in, I want to go have a threesome" It's more like "Hey Steph, who is that girl I saw back there" "Oh, that's so and so, you want me to see if she wants to come with us? Give me an xtra. 20 and I'll get her to go" Or "Hey, that was my friend so and so on the phone, if You go get her and get us some candy we'll come back and have some fun" I'd guess in the last 15 yrs I've had about a dozen 3 ways (more if you count the same two girls each time as one) a couple of times when this girl kathy I know was with me, a girl off the street just walked right into my shop. What I'm trying to say is that I can't "plan" a threesome, it just falls into place when it does.[/QUOTE]Got to agree with you on this one. Non planned threesomes are the ultimate.

[QUOTE=MrGreen;2145773]Got to agree with you on this one. Non planned threesomes are the ultimate.[/QUOTE]After a successful threesome that came about through one of the mentioned scenarios, you then have 2 girls that may call up going "Hey, come and get me, we can go get so and so like we did last time" or I might say when one or the other call "Have you seen so and so around? Lets see if we can find her and bring her along again" It only works when the girls are friends and that changes like their Ph #'s.

[QUOTE=LSpooner;2145929]After a successful threesome that came about through one of the mentioned scenarios, you then have 2 girls that may call up going "Hey, come and get me, we can go get so and so like we did last time" or I might say when one or the other call "Have you seen so and so around? Lets see if we can find her and bring her along again" It only works when the girls are friends and that changes like their Ph #'s.[/QUOTE]And the moral of the story, boys and girls: With Spooner as a wing-man, you can't go wrong. : the.

[QUOTE=Benz007;2145083]Reddish hair, 30's? If one I know then yes I would recommend.[/QUOTE]Can you give a guy a little info. Does she have skils? Is she tweaked out?

Actually Fellas, I mostly wrote about my recent misadventures in Tampa with a 'planned' 3-some as simple comic relief. It just struck me as funny to downright absurd the way the whole thing unraveled and fell to shit right before my eyes.

It's true I've never had much luck with the damn few I've tried to engineer, and I'd have to agree with the majority of responders that, like most things in life, serendipity and those spontaneous three-somes are almost always, by definition, going to be the best. In fact, in thinking about it, the majority of my most-memorable Mongering encounters, period, were of the 'un-planned' kind. For a case-in-point, one need read no further than my new post in the 'Florida-Other Areas' thread. Talk about a reversal of fortunes, from the mundane events in Tampa to the 'way-out there' while on the road, all in just a day!

So I guess I won't won't be getting that call to write for Jimmy Fallon or 'John Stewart and the 'Daily Show' after all. I certainly won't quit the day job.

At ease, Boys, and Monger on.

[QUOTE=JohnJon;2145970]Can you give a guy a little info. Does she have skils? Is she tweaked out?[/QUOTE]She has got skills, she quotes a high # but can be talked down. She loves the candy but was cool with me.

Anything specific pm the question.

The summary version.

Small talk was minimal, mostly akward. But that could have been because this was the first time we hung out.

Talked abouf price, she laughed at. 3 for BBBJ. I laugbed and then more silence. She agreed. So needless to say it was lackluster half ass. When it came time for the pop, she pulled up. Luckly I kinda of figured she might because of the agreement. She apologized and she's she tries to but it makes her gag.

One of my biggest problems is with workers witb no real skills acting like they should be rewarded on a higher level. So we head to drop her off and she say " So I guess you taking me to get a cappucino is out of the question" And it was.

A no repeat for me.

[QUOTE=Benz007;2146424]She has got skills, she quotes a high # but can be talked down. She loves the candy but was cool with me.

Anything specific pm the question.[/QUOTE]She does have skills people.

Saw brandy, deb and mickey, have numbers for the latter 2. Deb is prolly in her 50's lives down by Busch, good personality and friendly, Mickey is pretty fun as well, mid 30's auburn hair.