Massage Parlor Reports

Went to Wen / Wed whatever it's called today (31X C Maple in Vienna).

Mama, I guess, was at the desk when I came in. Surprised by the setup. Not a 2-door system. I tell her an hour and hand over the. 6. Unfortunately, she came in for my massage. Not my type at all. Sprayed alcohol on my hands and hers and gave me a paper towel to wipe my hands on.

I heard another monger come in right after and the phone was busy, too. Guessing there was one other provider working. She started immediately on soft touch, grazing the boys, and I knew I wasn't going to get a decent massage. Long soft touch for about 20 minutes, flip, and negotiations begin, causing me to lose interest. Agreed on. 8 for CBJ of course, she said didn't have change, and I didn't plan well, so it cost me. 9.

She dropped her mask, raised her top and got to work. If it wasn't the worst BJ I've ever had, it's in the top 5. Twice she stopped, stood up, and spit on the carpeted floor. (That was pretty horrifying, and I slid off the foot of the bed to put my shoes on at the end.).

Deed done, a little more massage on the front of my legs and I was probably done at:40-:45.

Dressed, she brought a water, opened the door, and there's the other monger, in a towel, right in front of me, being led to the bathroom by the other provider. I spun back into the room for a minute until he was gone, then went to head out where what do I see but yet another monger sitting in the lobby waiting his turn. No attempt to isolate mongers from each other.

Between the close calls with seeing you guys, the bad work, and the spitting on the carpet: 1. 5 total damage and will not repeat.

I had a delightful dream with Lisa at 8303. She provided a solid massage with HE and seemed to enjoy the undercover play. Total damage $120 for one hour with tip. I usually pay $60 for the hour plus a $40 tip but I upped the tip given that she got wet and moaned during the undercover play. Hey, ladies know how to role play. She said she is busy with lots of customers. Happy hunting.

[QUOTE=Backrub321;4829050]Went to Wen / Wed whatever it's called today (31X C Maple in Vienna).

Mama, I guess, was at the desk when I came in. Surprised by the setup. Not a 2-door system. I tell her an hour and hand over the. 6. Unfortunately, she came in for my massage. Not my type at all. Sprayed alcohol on my hands and hers and gave me a paper towel to wipe my hands on.

I heard another monger come in right after and the phone was busy, too. Guessing there was one other provider working. She started immediately on soft touch, grazing the boys, and I knew I wasn't going to get a decent massage. Long soft touch for about 20 minutes, flip, and negotiations begin, causing me to lose interest. Agreed on. 8 for CBJ of course, she said didn't have change, and I didn't plan well, so it cost me. 9.

She dropped her mask, raised her top and got to work. If it wasn't the worst BJ I've ever had, it's in the top 5. Twice she stopped, stood up, and spit on the carpeted floor. (That was pretty horrifying, and I slid off the foot of the bed to put my shoes on at the end.).

Deed done, a little more massage on the front of my legs and I was probably done at:40-:45.

Dressed, she brought a water, opened the door, and there's the other monger, in a towel, right in front of me, being led to the bathroom by the other provider. I spun back into the room for a minute until he was gone, then went to head out where what do I see but yet another monger sitting in the lobby waiting his turn. No attempt to isolate mongers from each other.

Between the close calls with seeing you guys, the bad work, and the spitting on the carpet: 1. 5 total damage and will not repeat.[/QUOTE]The sheets were stained and littered with pubic hair. The place looked like basic hygiene didn't exist. I walked out before letting them even lay a finger on me. I'm glad I didn't miss out on anything. Hope you showered twice after.

There's a another spa on 307 located in the building next door. Compared to Wed it's a palace of a place.

[QUOTE=Asphalt;4826314]Beware, it doesn't say she does nuru, is says she uses nuru gel. I'm not sure she would get the full slip and slide.[/QUOTE]That is an excellent point. I found KK's seaweed-gel offering, while quite enjoyable, was not the full Nuru experience. (She made that clear right from the get-go.) Might be true of Tara's premium offering, but that's definitely a full-Nuru price point. Hopefully, an intrepid gent will find out soon and share with everyone. Perhaps I will be the trailblazer. (Still debating.).

[QUOTE=Backrub321;4829050]Went to Wen / Wed whatever it's called today (31X C Maple in Vienna).[/QUOTE]I've been working from home while this quarantine has been going on. Due to the nature of my job though, I am required to travel to various offices around the area and this was the case this past week. I found myself close to the Maple Avenue area of Vienna also. There was a Chinese spot that I went to a few months ago that was really good. I got a great massage and a nice tugger there. Unfortunately they weren't answering the phone yesterday. A quick check of RM and no other real in depth research shows me that another establishment is very close. That establishment is I Spa.

I walk through the front door of the place and I am welcomed by the clang of what sounds like $593 worth of wind chimes hanging from the door knob. In hindsight I now know that the sound of those chimes were my audible cue that I was being whisked away to another realm. That door was like the door to the wardrobe leading to Narnia, although this place wasn't near as magical. The front door opens to a staircase. I ascend and I'm greeted at the top by two things.

The first thing I'm greeted by is the potent smell of recently cooked Chinese food. The second is a woman in her mid to late 50's who looks like the comic book version of the Joker. This lady was thin, gangling, had messy, stringy hair that was half pinned up and had a big Joker smile. She tells me that I can only have a hhr and leads me to the room. I pray she is mama. The room looked like the set of every crime scene from every "a hooker was strangled to death in this room by her panties" movie ever made. Dank walls, carpet, the room is lit up by red lights, and there is a couch in the room that was probably a prop from CSI SVU. The couch is old and covered in an old grubby sheet with an even grosser throw pillow. The massage table however is clean and smells of detergent.

In returns The Joker. But not going to lie. The Joker gave me a pretty good massage. She's decently strong and has good technique. She's nowhere near as good as the elites in the area, but she's good. Speaking of butt, The Joker began to tease there and do the ball and taint dance. I am hot toweled and flipped. She tickle teases the front with emphasis on my bozack and despite the view being lackluster I'm ready to go. She proceeds to give me a really nice Hugh Jackman. I place a hand on her ass but then quickly remove it. If I wanted pancakes I'd be at Cracker Barrel.

Eventually I shoot ropes everywhere and then The Joker got weird. She brought paper towels over to the table after grabbing lube for the tugger. But after I popped, she has the big Joker smile, grabs the pop with her finger tips and says "wow you shot X times" and picked it up off of me and played with it with her fingers for a few seconds before cleanup. Now, if one of the angels from the Hall of Fame would've done that would I have been weirded out? Maybe not. I may have gotten even harder and asked for another hhr. But her doing it with that Joker smile and face, in that generic, Netflix crime scene reenactment setting, convinced me that the food I smelled as I walked in was the last monger that visited 8 MM Narnia and I needed to go before The Joker realizes that she'd like to know what burly mulatto tastes like covered in Kung Pao sauce. I got up to get dressed and she told me I could sit on the couch that looks like it's covered in HIV and COVID-19 to put my shoes and stuff on. Little does she know, you couldn't pay me to sit on that couch. Well maybe you could. But it'd have to be enough to cover my inevitable clinical fees and buy a new project car.

If this level of vice sounds like your cup of tea, "I Spa Vienna" is the Google search and I paid 4 house and 4 to The Joker. Stay safe brahs.

Frankie.

[QUOTE=HughJapenis;4828060]No cover needed? So is BBFS and option here?[/QUOTE]Legit only at Angel afaik, but BBFS is the norm at CC. Ask for Tori, bit of a GILF but is a good dirty do-anything lady. 60 for half hour. Back in the room after a good TS, lay face up and she will pretty quickly just hop on and give you a camel slide. I changed angle a bit and slipped it in and said oops sorry I don't have a cover. She said oh well you bring next time and turned over to receive a good pounding and finally pulled out to COP. No discussion at all about donation or tip before or after. After cleanup I donated 140 that she pocketed without counting.

I see that Daisy in McLean is also open now.

[QUOTE=HughJapenis;4828060]No cover needed? So is BBFS and option here?[/QUOTE]Legit only at Angel afaik, but BBFS is the norm at CC. Ask for Tori, bit of a GILF but is a good, dirty, do-anything lady. 60 for half hour. Back in the room after a good TS, lay face up and she will pretty quickly just hop on and give you a camel slide. I changed angle a bit and slipped it in and said oops sorry I don't have a cover. She said oh well you bring next time and turned over to receive a good pounding and finally pulled out to COP. No discussion at all about donation or tip before or after. After cleanup I donated 140 that she pocketed without counting.

I see that Daisy in McLean is also open now.

[QUOTE=GripNSip;4829686]The sheets were stained and littered with pubic hair. The place looked like basic hygiene didn't exist. I walked out before letting them even lay a finger on me. I'm glad I didn't miss out on anything. Hope you showered twice after.

There's a another spa on 307 located in the building next door. Compared to Wed it's a palace of a place.[/QUOTE]I've been back to that one before 3-1-1 C did have a clean "disposable" cover (the kind with the slit cut for the face hole), and I was definitely the first to use it (I hope it was changed out for the monger in the lobby) The towel was clean, too.

Hell yes I showered twice afterward. Disinfected the car, too.

[QUOTE=FrankDigitola;4829746]I've been working from home while this quarantine has been going on. Due to the nature of my job though, I am required to travel to various offices around the area and this was the case this past week. I found myself close to the Maple Avenue area of Vienna also. There was a Chinese spot that I went to a few months ago that was really good. I got a great massage and a nice tugger there. Unfortunately they weren't answering the phone yesterday. A quick check of RM and no other real in depth research shows me that another establishment is very close. That establishment is I Spa.

I walk through the front door of the place and I am welcomed by the clang of what sounds like $593 worth of wind chimes hanging from the door knob. In hindsight I now know that the sound of those chimes were my audible cue that I was being whisked away to another realm. That door was like the door to the wardrobe leading to Narnia, although this place wasn't near as magical. The front door opens to a staircase. I ascend and I'm greeted at the top by two things.

The first thing I'm greeted by is the potent smell of recently cooked Chinese food. The second is a woman in her mid to late 50's who looks like the comic book version of the Joker. This lady was thin, gangling, had messy, stringy hair that was half pinned up and had a big Joker smile. She tells me that I can only have a hhr and leads me to the room. I pray she is mama. The room looked like the set of every crime scene from every "a hooker was strangled to death in this room by her panties" movie ever made. Dank walls, carpet, the room is lit up by red lights, and there is a couch in the room that was probably a prop from CSI SVU. The couch is old and covered in an old grubby sheet with an even grosser throw pillow. The massage table however is clean and smells of detergent.

In returns The Joker. But not going to lie. The Joker gave me a pretty good massage. She's decently strong and has good technique. She's nowhere near as good as the elites in the area, but she's good. Speaking of butt, The Joker began to tease there and do the ball and taint dance. I am hot toweled and flipped. She tickle teases the front with emphasis on my bozack and despite the view being lackluster I'm ready to go. She proceeds to give me a really nice Hugh Jackman. I place a hand on her ass but then quickly remove it. If I wanted pancakes I'd be at Cracker Barrel.

Eventually I shoot ropes everywhere and then The Joker got weird. She brought paper towels over to the table after grabbing lube for the tugger. But after I popped, she has the big Joker smile, grabs the pop with her finger tips and says "wow you shot X times" and picked it up off of me and played with it with her fingers for a few seconds before cleanup. Now, if one of the angels from the Hall of Fame would've done that would I have been weirded out? Maybe not. I may have gotten even harder and asked for another hhr. But her doing it with that Joker smile and face, in that generic, Netflix crime scene reenactment setting, convinced me that the food I smelled as I walked in was the last monger that visited 8 MM Narnia and I needed to go before The Joker realizes that she'd like to know what burly mulatto tastes like covered in Kung Pao sauce. I got up to get dressed and she told me I could sit on the couch that looks like it's covered in HIV and COVID-19 to put my shoes and stuff on. Little does she know, you couldn't pay me to sit on that couch. Well maybe you could. But it'd have to be enough to cover my inevitable clinical fees and buy a new project car.

If this level of vice sounds like your cup of tea, "I Spa Vienna" is the Google search and I paid 4 house and 4 to The Joker. Stay safe brahs.

Frankie.[/QUOTE]Whatever your job is, you need to quit and become a writer, probably comedy.

[QUOTE=Asphalt;4826326]Probably Franconia, sorry.[/QUOTE]Did she "have" a cute face, like MILF or naughty aunt type?

[QUOTE=Oldfart69;4792405]I have had good experience with Luna and found her well worth the price of admission. I'm terrible on ages, but thought she looked like a well preserved 50 or so. The pictures in the ad are of her but are very old.[/QUOTE]Saw Luna a couple years ago and she's really friendly and makes you feel she's into pleasing you. She's older than what I'm used to, but her attitude, looks and session was well worth it. Really enjoyed sliding between her thighs and on occasion it would almost pop inside. She kept telling my no inside because I did not have a cover on yet, but she allowed a long teasing session of almost slipping inside. It took me a really long time to finish and she kept commenting how long I was able last. The good thing she didn't rush me and it was a full hr of bliss. Skipped the shower because time was up.

I was in the area scoping out to see if the gals from sister spa had returned to Annandale and was crushed to discover that they were still closed due to the virus. Defeated, I walked down the stairs of 7540 little river and saw a danky sign that read "neck and shoulder massage" with an arrow you'd expect to see on a neon sign at a quirky red light district but at an even lower budget. I followed this arrow that lead me to the backside of the building where I spotted a white car with another sign that said massage and yet another arrow pointing its way to the door. With time to kill and a yearning for adventure and experimentation I made way like a horny Alice in wonderland and followed this rabbit hole to a door with a plaque that read Anna health essential oil massage or some shit and open a door that lead down to the basement. The place looked like I opened a portal into China town because the Animals of the Chinese zodiac were imprinted on each stair as I'm lead into the massage venue hidden deep within the basement of this building. The loadout is what you might find at a Chinese rub and tug trying way too hard, with tables separated merely by curtains and decorations of Chinese lanterns just strung ubiquitously throughout. Mamasan was sitting at the desk and with a sign that read $49/ hr I couldn't refuse. I paid the lady who also turned out to be my masseuse and made my way into the room to undress.

There's no tug here. Surprisingly despite the tackiness expected of a jackshack. This place is legit. The massage was ok. It's definitely worth the 50 for the hour but I was surprised to discover truthfully I've had better at my AMPs. I seldom get legit massages so the experience was nice in that it allowed me to appreciate that some of these ladies in that AMP business can really compete with the actual CMTs. Would I return? Probably not. But I did find it educational and a bit humorous. The place you'd think of as a typical happy ending parlor is legit where as if you take a trek to a place as immaculate as spa sung, you'd go in and expect a legit massage with no extras. Food for thought.

I know that the independants in general are kind of a crapshoot and tend to stay with some of the more well known ones such as Nikki, KK, etc. , but has anyone had any experience with the ones in the Reston / Herndon area. Currently I see Procha, Ginger (not sure if she is spicy or not), Candy, and Tanya.

For that matter are any of the AMP's advertising? I have been looking around and have not seen anything. Perhaps they are staying under the radar.

[QUOTE=SlowBlo;4821342]If you have a wad of cash and want a massage and FS go see Ava and Tiffany. They are fantastic. 250 gets you a great massage with beautiful Ava then great BBBJ, DATY and CFS with beautiful Tiffany. At one point Ava will be massaging your front side while naked Tiffany will be playing with you dick. It's heaven.[/QUOTE]Can someone send details?

[QUOTE=XKiller;4831711]Can someone send details?[/QUOTE]Please learn how to search. No that difficult.

[QUOTE=XKiller;4831711]Can someone send details?[/QUOTE][URL]https://nova.bedpage.com/TherapeuticMassage/massage-by-ava/9591051.html[/URL]

[QUOTE=SlowBlo;4832014][URL]https://nova.bedpage.com/TherapeuticMassage/massage-by-ava/9591051.html[/URL][/QUOTE][URL]https://cityxguide.com/escorts/tiffany-thai-40129764[/URL]

[QUOTE=Bentaki;4830087]Legit only at Angel afaik, but BBFS is the norm at CC. Ask for Tori, bit of a GILF but is a good, dirty, do-anything lady. 60 for half hour. Back in the room after a good TS, lay face up and she will pretty quickly just hop on and give you a camel slide. I changed angle a bit and slipped it in and said oops sorry I don't have a cover. She said oh well you bring next time and turned over to receive a good pounding and finally pulled out to COP. No discussion at all about donation or tip before or after. After cleanup I donated 140 that she pocketed without counting.

I see that Daisy in McLean is also open now.[/QUOTE]You're talking about CC Wellness in McLean, correct?

Prior to closure, has anyone been to Nikki's Massage Spa in Manassas? I'm curious if it's strictly therapeutic or if HE is on the Menu. Waiting for re-opening. TIA.

[QUOTE=DarkRanger00;4832254]You're talking about CC Wellness in McLean, correct?[/QUOTE]Well I went to CC and got Tori and sadly when my member went full mast I tried the same tactic as Ben and was vehemently denied access. Tori told me she just do HJ and that she never does that. Which I know is total bullshit but, then again the lesson here is just because Johnny six packs gets to pound poon and post about it doesn't mean she's going to open up the block to every backstreet boy who wants to party. Maybe she's got her reasons. Maybe I'm too big for her, maybe I'm not big enough? Our chemistry wasn't there and I have to accept. I took the loss and moved on. Brothers let me know if you have success but as a rule of thumb don't expect the holy grail of flips on your first visit, or second. As was my case. I won't return because I can get much better elsewhere. Tori is definitely 60's Pushkin 70's with an ok body for her age but a face that's droopier than droopy dog.

[QUOTE=SixNineIsFine;4832950]Prior to closure, has anyone been to Nikki's Massage Spa in Manassas? I'm curious if it's strictly therapeutic or if HE is on the Menu. Waiting for re-opening. TIA.[/QUOTE]I have been there and to the one in LakeRidge. Its a YMMV place. So if they like you after a while and you get their trust you can get more like all these AMPs. It depends unless its a straight up HE or more place.

Has anyone been recently? Last time I was there, I had Amy. She's pretty and all, but wasn't a fan of the up sell for more services. Table Shower was just OK too. Any intel on recent excursions or new talent would be greatly appreciated!

[QUOTE=GripNSip;4833121]Well I went to CC and got Tori and sadly when my member went full mast I tried the same tactic as Ben and was vehemently denied access. Tori told me she just do HJ and that she never does that. Which I know is total bullshit but, then again the lesson here is just because Johnny six packs gets to pound poon and post about it doesn't mean she's going to open up the block to every backstreet boy who wants to party. Maybe she's got her reasons. Maybe I'm too big for her, maybe I'm not big enough? Our chemistry wasn't there and I have to accept. I took the loss and moved on. Brothers let me know if you have success but as a rule of thumb don't expect the holy grail of flips on your first visit, or second. As was my case. I won't return because I can get much better elsewhere. Tori is definitely 60's Pushkin 70's with an ok body for her age but a face that's droopier than droopy dog.[/QUOTE]Especially at AMPs, the gates of heaven may not open for everyone. Also, reviews sometimes may be enhanced for various reasons. It really is YMMV and the presence of a super review does not alter the YMMV rule.

[QUOTE=Cuhio112;4833412]Has anyone been recently? Last time I was there, I had Amy. She's pretty and all, but wasn't a fan of the up sell for more services. Table Shower was just OK too. Any intel on recent excursions or new talent would be greatly appreciated![/QUOTE]Must be NYC thing. Women are too pushy and kills the atmosphere. I walked out after shower and asked for money back. That is how bad it was.

It was in a Korean MP on Wisconsin Ave, above Georgetown. She was probably 45, with drawn-on eyebrows and a terrifying painted-on smile.

Now, was the Joker I met the same Joker you met? That's a trick question, of course.

Is the Jack Nicholson Joker the same as the Heath Ledger, Jared Leto, Joaquin Phoenix, or Cesar Romero Jokers?

South Park had the Mexican Joker; I met the Korean Joker, and you met the Chinese Joker, but the Joker, like Black Panther and Green Lantern, all have their own form of continuity which allow them to have different names and forms for the times and places in which they appear.

[QUOTE=FrankDigitola;4829746]The first thing I'm greeted by is the potent smell of recently cooked Chinese food. The second is a woman in her mid to late 50's who looks like the comic book version of the Joker. This lady was thin, gangling, had messy, stringy hair that was half pinned up and had a big Joker smile.. I pray she is mama.

In returns The Joker. But not going to lie. The Joker gave me a pretty good massage. She's decently strong and has good technique. She's nowhere near as good as the elites in the area, but she's good. Speaking of butt, The Joker began to tease there and do the ball and taint dance. I place a hand on her ass but then quickly remove it. If I wanted pancakes I'd be at Cracker Barrel.

Eventually I shoot ropes everywhere and then The Joker got weird. She brought paper towels over to the table after grabbing lube for the tugger. But after I popped, she has the big Joker smile, grabs the pop with her finger tips and says "wow you shot X times" and picked it up off of me and played with it with her fingers for a few seconds before cleanup. But her doing it with that Joker smile and face, in that generic, Netflix crime scene reenactment setting, convinced me that the food I smelled as I walked in was the last monger that visited 8 MM Narnia and I needed to go before The Joker realizes that she'd like to know what burly mulatto tastes like covered in Kung Pao sauce.
[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=VAmongerman;4833831]Especially at AMPs, the gates of heaven may not open for everyone. Also, reviews sometimes may be enhanced for various reasons. It really is YMMV and the presence of a super review does not alter the YMMV rule.[/QUOTE]This is so true. I've had people put me onto providers that they have smashed BB many times and were guaranteed good times. Then I give them a try and the girls act as if that has never been on the menu. It's a high risk low reward activity, so if you aren't vibing, you probably aren't going to get that. Back to the target at hand, I've seen Tori and had the experience that Bentaki had, but my list of misses is plenty long.

[QUOTE=FrankDigitola;4829746]I've been working from home while this quarantine has been going on. Due to the nature of my job though, I am required to travel to various offices around the area and this was the case this past week. I found myself close to the Maple Avenue area of Vienna also. There was a Chinese spot that I went to a few months ago that was really good. I got a great massage and a nice tugger there. Unfortunately they weren't answering the phone yesterday. A quick check of RM and no other real in depth research shows me that another establishment is very close. That establishment is I Spa.

I walk through the front door of the place and I am welcomed by the clang of what sounds like $593 worth of wind chimes hanging from the door knob. In hindsight I now know that the sound of those chimes were my audible cue that I was being whisked away to another realm. That door was like the door to the wardrobe leading to Narnia, although this place wasn't near as magical. The front door opens to a staircase. I ascend and I'm greeted at the top by two things.

The first thing I'm greeted by is the potent smell of recently cooked Chinese food. The second is a woman in her mid to late 50's who looks like the comic book version of the Joker. This lady was thin, gangling, had messy, stringy hair that was half pinned up and had a big Joker smile. She tells me that I can only have a hhr and leads me to the room. I pray she is mama. The room looked like the set of every crime scene from every "a hooker was strangled to death in this room by her panties" movie ever made. Dank walls, carpet, the room is lit up by red lights, and there is a couch in the room that was probably a prop from CSI SVU. The couch is old and covered in an old grubby sheet with an even grosser throw pillow. The massage table however is clean and smells of detergent.

In returns The Joker. But not going to lie. The Joker gave me a pretty good massage. She's decently strong and has good technique. She's nowhere near as good as the elites in the area, but she's good. Speaking of butt, The Joker began to tease there and do the ball and taint dance. I am hot toweled and flipped. She tickle teases the front with emphasis on my bozack and despite the view being lackluster I'm ready to go. She proceeds to give me a really nice Hugh Jackman. I place a hand on her ass but then quickly remove it. If I wanted pancakes I'd be at Cracker Barrel.

Eventually I shoot ropes everywhere and then The Joker got weird. She brought paper towels over to the table after grabbing lube for the tugger. But after I popped, she has the big Joker smile, grabs the pop with her finger tips and says "wow you shot X times" and picked it up off of me and played with it with her fingers for a few seconds before cleanup. Now, if one of the angels from the Hall of Fame would've done that would I have been weirded out? Maybe not. I may have gotten even harder and asked for another hhr. But her doing it with that Joker smile and face, in that generic, Netflix crime scene reenactment setting, convinced me that the food I smelled as I walked in was the last monger that visited 8 MM Narnia and I needed to go before The Joker realizes that she'd like to know what burly mulatto tastes like covered in Kung Pao sauce. I got up to get dressed and she told me I could sit on the couch that looks like it's covered in HIV and COVID-19 to put my shoes and stuff on. Little does she know, you couldn't pay me to sit on that couch. Well maybe you could. But it'd have to be enough to cover my inevitable clinical fees and buy a new project car.

If this level of vice sounds like your cup of tea, "I Spa Vienna" is the Google search and I paid 4 house and 4 to The Joker. Stay safe brahs.

Frankie.[/QUOTE]Frankie,

You write one hell of an entertaining report! Informative, too!

Off of a recommendation I traveled to FC to visit the spa. I did not know what to expect, so I chose a mixed option of services. There was only one masseuse (mid to late 40's), and I was not really attracted to her. Expecting nothing special, the massage seemed pretty legit and exceptional good, but the shower scrub seemed very professional at first. Sometime after the flip is when all of the excitement began. She gets on top and slides me slowly inside her and just sits there for a moment before we get into it. Afterwards, she cleaned me up and met me in the front professionally as a few women come into the spa for massages. So, this is another another case of YMMV, but I had a great time even though I may never return. Total provided $$5.

[QUOTE=BigCoolie;4835352]Off of a recommendation I traveled to FC to visit the spa. I did not know what to expect, so I chose a mixed option of services. There was only one masseuse (mid to late 40's), and I was not really attracted to her. Expecting nothing special, the massage seemed pretty legit and exceptional good, but the shower scrub seemed very professional at first. Sometime after the flip is when all of the excitement began. She gets on top and slides me slowly inside her and just sits there for a moment before we get into it. Afterwards, she cleaned me up and met me in the front professionally as a few women come into the spa for massages. So, this is another another case of YMMV, but I had a great time even though I may never return. Total provided $$5.[/QUOTE]Did she require a cover, or did she just pop it in?

[QUOTE=BigCoolie;4835352]Off of a recommendation I traveled to FC to visit the spa. I did not know what to expect, so I chose a mixed option of services. There was only one masseuse (mid to late 40's), and I was not really attracted to her. Expecting nothing special, the massage seemed pretty legit and exceptional good, but the shower scrub seemed very professional at first. Sometime after the flip is when all of the excitement began. She gets on top and slides me slowly inside her and just sits there for a moment before we get into it. Afterwards, she cleaned me up and met me in the front professionally as a few women come into the spa for massages. So, this is another another case of YMMV, but I had a great time even though I may never return. Total provided $$5.[/QUOTE]Excuse my ignorance, but FC? Don't recall what that is or seeing it on the board.

[QUOTE=Korman23;4835862]Excuse my ignorance, but FC? Don't recall what that is or seeing it on the board[/QUOTE]Falls Church. You can google fruit and spa. It will be the first one.

I thought that place was 100 percent legit.

Read in these pages that Angel spa in McLean was legit and I was looking for a good one. Stopped in and Michelle met in the lobby with no mask on. She's about 5'9" or so and wore a shirt that showed some midriff and white jeans. Into the room and onto the table. Her massage was pretty good, attentive but I've had better and the price was ok, . 7 or. 6 I can't remember. She really spent a lot of time on my butt which led me to believe, especially since her shirt was made for roaming, that I might just get a bit more that day but it wasn't to be. I wouldn't go out of my way to see her again but if I'm in the area I might stop in for a good butt rub.

Later that day I'm in Vienna and remembered I-Spa. In the mood for a bit of strange I stopped in there too and got the full load of chimes, Chinese food and a bit of cigarette smoke to round out the experience. Whatever he name is she's not the Joker but I'd swear I've seen that face carved into a jack o'lantern somewhere. Good thing she's fairly cheap, . 6, because her massage is clearly below par. She offered to give me some help at the end but steadfastly refused to let me roam. With a face like hers you'd expect her to want all the roaming she could get. "I guess a rock's out of the question. " Monger elsewhere.

PS No response from some PMs so could someone tell me if Jiji has natural tits? I'd like to know what FC is too.

[QUOTE=BigCoolie;4835352]Off of a recommendation I traveled to FC to visit the spa. I did not know what to expect, so I chose a mixed option of services. There was only one masseuse (mid to late 40's), and I was not really attracted to her. Expecting nothing special, the massage seemed pretty legit and exceptional good, but the shower scrub seemed very professional at first. Sometime after the flip is when all of the excitement began. She gets on top and slides me slowly inside her and just sits there for a moment before we get into it. Afterwards, she cleaned me up and met me in the front professionally as a few women come into the spa for massages. So, this is another another case of YMMV, but I had a great time even though I may never return. Total provided $$5.[/QUOTE]So I PMd for info as well, but started to dwell on this post because I'm a no good degenerate. But I'm a no good degenerate with a brain. So I started zoning in on the possibilities of spas in my data base with the abbreviation of FC or FC massage. But I came up empty. But I see here that coolie gave us a clue. He said fruity place. So then I'm thinking, well maybe this is a spa with some sort of fruit moniker. FC then isn't the name but the location. Falls Church. Sure enough with those clues in place I looked up spas in Falls church and came across Fruit Spa on Arlington Blvd. I remember passing by the place since it's close to seven therapy. Always figured it was legit. I tried to TOFFT and make an appt but they close at 7 pm which is unfortunate since I'm stuck at work. So if one of you brahs want to complete the mission for me, don't forget to hook me up with your findings.

GnS.

[QUOTE=SunCap3;4834308]Must be NYC thing. Women are too pushy and kills the atmosphere. I walked out after shower and asked for money back. That is how bad it was.[/QUOTE]She offered the steak and quoted $$5. I said "look at yourself, you think you are in your 20's"? You can see her eyes got wider and shocked. I got up and left. Yes siree!

[QUOTE=DevilVRod;4836379]She offered the steak and quoted $$5. I said "look at yourself, you think you are in your 20's"? You can see her eyes got wider and shocked. I got up and left. Yes siree![/QUOTE]I stopped seeing Korean providers a long time ago because of this stuff. While they are attractive, they lack the tenderness and intimacy that others can provide.

[QUOTE=GripNSip;4835912]So I PMd for info as well, but started to dwell on this post because I'm a no good degenerate. But I'm a no good degenerate with a brain. So I started zoning in on the possibilities of spas in my data base with the abbreviation of FC or FC massage. But I came up empty. But I see here that coolie gave us a clue. He said fruity place. So then I'm thinking, well maybe this is a spa with some sort of fruit moniker. FC then isn't the name but the location. Falls Church. Sure enough with those clues in place I looked up spas in Falls church and came across Fruit Spa on Arlington Blvd. I remember passing by the place since it's close to seven therapy. Always figured it was legit. I tried to TOFFT and make an appt but they close at 7 pm which is unfortunate since I'm stuck at work. So if one of you brahs want to complete the mission for me, don't forget to hook me up with your findings.

GnS.[/QUOTE]Fruit had a young man at the appointment desk. Unfortunately for me they were ALL booked up for the day. As others have said it all looks legit. It seems that I'll have to schedule an appointment. This board usually doesn't lead us astray.

So on to my Backup Plan C (C&C) . I decided I too would like to see if (YEMV) with Tori. DO YOU FEEL LUCKY PUNK. Well yes, it was my lucky day.

[QUOTE=Start2;4837224]Fruit had a young man at the appointment desk. Unfortunately for me they were ALL booked up for the day. As others have said it all looks legit. It seems that I'll have to schedule an appointment. This board usually doesn't lead us astray.

So on to my Backup Plan C (C&C) . I decided I too would like to see if (YEMV) with Tori. DO YOU FEEL LUCKY PUNK. Well yes, it was my lucky day.[/QUOTE]Hmmm. I'm not sure what I did wrong w / Tori. To me she made it seem like she NEVER gave FS. Wouldn't let me anywhere near the thing.

I'm not an ugly dude either. I guess I just have to start working out again hahaha. Something about my physique isn't gellin'.

If you mongers got some health tips, feel free to share it's going to a good cause. Getting me laid LOL.

BodyRubShop and CityXGuide have been seized by DOJ, DHS, USSS, & Texas local.

Also passed by CS off 28, open sign in window.

Thanks gentlemen that responded about the FC thing. I was trying to come up with a spa with those letters, wasn't thinking about the place. I did guess that the "fruity" title might have something to do with it but since I'm mainly a MD guy it just never occurred to me.

I got to chance to TOFFT and visited spa fruit.

I was greeted by a young man (red flag no1) who ushered me into the room for my massage package (red flag 2). They do an array of different things in addition to the basic FB massage and when I asked if they had a table shower I was given this deluxe vichy shower. So it's a 30 min massage followed by a 30 min vichy shower. The whole place smelled of legit. Massage tables, sauna, and three shower rooms. It's a pretty big place. So I'm finally am greeted by lily. She's a 40-50's Vietnamese woman. Very small very thin. Couldn't tell if you if she was good looking. She was covered head to toe and wearing a face mask, gloves, and face shield. A staple warrior ready to take on Covid19. (Red flag no 3). So she begins the massage portion first. Which I questioned her on, "shouldn't we do table shower first?" "No. Massage first" (red flag no 4) I place my clothes into a nice bag and am directed to bring it with me when we enter the other room for the TS post massage.

The massage was pretty nice. I tried to break the ice by finding out more about Lilly. She says she's a single mother with 2 sons who help her with managing the day to day spa, which explained the young man working the reception. She doesn't own the place she told me it's a side business of a gov worker (red flag no 4).

It was a good massage and she is a pleasant lady. No flip. Covered all the time. Once it was done she ushered me to the shower, where she kept Johnny covered and when I asked if she would scrub him as well she told me politely and professionally that while she won't touch I'm more than welcome to soap and do myself.(Flag de Rojo) This Vichy shower is fully decked out like high end spas with tons of shower heads placed above a table in a line, it was a pretty nice experience. Just, legit. Once that was done so was my hour. At least I wasn't shorted. I said welp that's all huh? She told me many clients opt to a 30 min massage after and since I was thinking with little brain I thought that might be the secret password to get what I came for.

So my journey continues to a third professional looking room with candles and another comfortable massage table. The tables here aren't just two stacks of ply wood covered with bedsheets. They're contoured and automated. (Red flag no. Where was I? 6? Yeah let's say 6) here she told me to lie face up (and that was the only shining hope of something more) so I complied face up, but completely covered (well, shit.) stretching of the arms and legs, some face massage. Honestly, I can't even be that angry. Lilly gives a damn good massage. But, after 30 more minutes, I left with heavy testicles and light wallet. There's nothing here, at least not for me.

The 90 min excursion cost me $$.16 schmeckles. Would I be stupid again and repeat? Sure, maybe not for the whole spa package
BS but I did walk away feeling more limber.


Analysis time: Maybe I lead you all astray. Maybe there is a banana spa somewhere in falls church and I fucked up. Maybe I played all my cards wrong. Maybe I was supposed to say some secret phrase and failed some extensive LEO test. Whatever the case there is something clear. Maybe I saw someone different than Coolie, the place is certainly big enough to hold more than one staff. I’d love to dissect my experience with Coolie for sure. But one thing is certain. YMMV is working against me. Hard.

I can't help but shake the fact I've lost my monger spark. I feel like that baseball player whose best years are behind him. Ive gone from cracking bad boys out the park to striking out bat after bat. I'm in a covid slump.
-GnS.