Massage Parlor Reports

I've never been to the one in Alabaster but if it's like Panda, the problem lies with the curtains for doors. And it always seems like someone is either coming in or leaving, or is in the next room. Or the phone rings and someone leaves to go answer it. There are things to be had, in a way, if the right girl is there (at Panda). There have been a few that will let you suck on their titties, rub their crotch, squeeze a little ass, etc. And some have had no problem with things like that. The problem is you're going to have to take care of yourself. There was one time where all of the above was achieved while she played with my balls, as I hammered away on myself. Believe me I tried to place it in her hands, but she just playfully slapped it away. And I think I tipped 10-15 bucks which was well worth it. They understand the drill, and they pretty much know why we are all there. I don't know why they just don't give in. But you are right about the tipping. If they don't do domething to you, or you to them, fuck that tipping shit. It's like I told that chick the other day. "You didn't do anything to get a tip.

[QUOTE=DirtySouth19;1927156]Hey guys still new to the hobby but thought I would give my first report. Went to both the Alabaster AMP and Panda last week and really enjoyed both. Alabaster had the better massage and the ts was an added bonus while panda def. Had the better looking girl but she was rude about asking for a tip as I left although I felt it unnecessary because she was only doing what she was paid to do and didn't even give a good tease. All in all I don't think there are extras to be had at either but that could be cause I'm new to this.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1927888]I've never been to the one in Alabaster but if it's like Panda, the problem lies with the curtains for doors. And it always seems like someone is either coming in or leaving, or is in the next room. Or the phone rings and someone leaves to go answer it. There are things to be had, in a way, if the right girl is there (at Panda). There have been a few that will let you suck on their titties, rub their crotch, squeeze a little ass, etc. And some have had no problem with things like that. The problem is you're going to have to take care of yourself. There was one time where all of the above was achieved while she played with my balls, as I hammered away on myself. Believe me I tried to place it in her hands, but she just playfully slapped it away. And I think I tipped 10-15 bucks which was well worth it. They understand the drill, and they pretty much know why we are all there. I don't know why they just don't give in. But you are right about the tipping. If they don't do domething to you, or you to them, fuck that tipping shit. It's like I told that chick the other day. "You didn't do anything to get a tip.[/QUOTE]The curtain doors suck.. The first time I went to Alabaster, as I walk by a room and the curtain was only closed half way and some dude on his back undraped.. Not the visual I wanted going into my massage. I use to go see Cindy at Alabaster, which was well worth the trip. But the others I've seen only allowed self-service. Panda, I did get to play with tits once but it's always been self serve too. I don't care for jerking my own schlong during massage. Don't know why they think they'll get in trouble, it's a massage. I believe, according to law, the client should be draped. I rarely get draped unless they require it. Most will just leave it off and deliberately rub close even graze your schlong and balls to get you hard and leave you hanging.

Stopped by the new H Massage on 280, across from Chic Fil A. Massage was a bit pricey and a little lackluster but her hands roamed free and eventually she tended to my business while I lay face down. Never had that before. I had to lift my ass a little while she went under the chassis. Didn't speak much English and didn't understand her name, but go give it a shot. See what you come up with.

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1928884]Stopped by the new H Massage on 280, across from Chic Fil A. Massage was a bit pricey and a little lackluster but her hands roamed free and eventually she tended to my business while I lay face down. Never had that before. I had to lift my ass a little while she went under the chassis. Didn't speak much English and didn't understand her name, but go give it a shot. See what you come up with.[/QUOTE]Ran into the guy from Foot in Hoover, and he said Lily (from Hoover) was working at H, but a couple of other girls were coming.

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1928884]Stopped by the new H Massage on 280, across from Chic Fil A. Massage was a bit pricey and a little lackluster but her hands roamed free and eventually she tended to my business while I lay face down. Never had that before. I had to lift my ass a little while she went under the chassis. Didn't speak much English and didn't understand her name, but go give it a shot. See what you come up with.[/QUOTE]Prices same as Hoover ($79/ hr I think)?

Same folks from Houlang run this I think. I went in and nothing doing for me.

Hey guys, been behind the scenes going around AMPs pretty much, thought it's time for me to leave some reviews about one's I've visited.

Panda as far as I've experienced, good massage, but nothing else, I've not actually tried flipping over over there at all.

H massage tried it recently, but I've not gotten any extra service there, pretty much covered all the way.

The only place I've had luck is VIP, but then again you kinda expect HEs there in the first place.

As for Foot. Well I don't quite know how I feel about that place yet. I just recently went for the first time and when it was time to use her foot, it was basically all butt action from there. It was sort of a prostate massage with her feet, which oddly enough was a weird feeling because at one point I'm thinking she better not bust my nut doing this or give me the proverbial "foot in my ass", but then at the same time I was, aroused? And then on the flip, totally hard, she didn't cover, massaged pretty near my shaft for a while, but declined a HJ. Blue balled...again.

Might give foot another try next time to see what happens.

You're going to leave there with blue nuts everytime unless you want to take matters in your own hands. That foot shit feels good in certain spots, but it's really just a lazy ass way to do a massage. And without a good massage at these places, you have nothing to show for the money you've spent. So, they're not going to do anything sexual wih you. Their objective is to do what they are doing with you. Tease you a little and get you to come back. Maybe tease you some more, get you to come back. And by then with the money you've spent you could've went to VIP and got balls deep in something.

[QUOTE=NoPainNoGain;1932607]Hey guys, been behind the scenes going around AMPs pretty much, thought it's time for me to leave some reviews about one's I've visit0ed.

Panda as far as I've experienced, good massage, but nothing else, I've not actually tried flipping over over there at all.

H massage tried it recently, but I've not gotten any extra service there, pretty much covered all the way.

The only place I've had luck is VIP, but then again you kinda expect HEs there in the first place.

As for Foot. Well I don't quite know how I feel about that place yet. I just recently went for the first time and when it was time to use her foot, it was basically all butt action from there. It was sort of a prostate massage with her feet, which oddly enough was a weird feeling because at one point I'm thinking she better not bust my nut doing this or give me the proverbial "foot in my ass", but then at the same time I was, aroused? And then on the flip, totally hard, she didn't cover, massaged pretty near my shaft for a while, but declined a HJ. Blue balled...again.

Might give foot another try next time to see what happens.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1933317]You're going to leave there with blue nuts everytime unless you want to take matters in your own hands. That foot shit feels good in certain spots, but it's really just a lazy ass way to do a massage. And without a good massage at these places, you have nothing to show for the money you've spent. So, they're not going to do anything sexual wih you. Their objective is to do what they are doing with you. Tease you a little and get you to come back. Maybe tease you some more, get you to come back. And by then with the money you've spent you could've went to VIP and got balls deep in something.[/QUOTE]I agree 100%. Its like paying good money to watch a chef prepare a nice meal, then going out back and fixing a sandwich in the alley. It is strange to me to jerk off in front of somebody who is only waiting on you to get done so they can change the sheets (hopefully) for the next victim.

[QUOTE=Bully;1930635]Ran into the guy from Foot in Hoover, and he said Lily (from Hoover) was working at H, but a couple of other girls were coming.[/QUOTE]Mr. Houling owns H, Hoover FA, and Houling in Vestavia. I went in and he was there along with two girls from Hoover FA. Hour massage is 75, there is no ts and I saw four massage rooms, 3 with curtain doors and one with regular door. Massage wasn't great and I had to be draped the whole time. There wasn't even a tease. I won't be going back for 75, especially when you can go to Panda for 50.

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1933317]You're going to leave there with blue nuts everytime unless you want to take matters in your own hands. That foot shit feels good in certain spots, but it's really just a lazy ass way to do a massage. And without a good massage at these places, you have nothing to show for the money you've spent. So, they're not going to do anything sexual wih you. Their objective is to do what they are doing with you. Tease you a little and get you to come back. Maybe tease you some more, get you to come back. And by then with the money you've spent you could've went to VIP and got balls deep in something.[/QUOTE]I know it worked for me. Get massage with a tease, draws me back few more time only for the same tease or stroking my own schlong. I believe the next time I end up power stroking my own schlong, I might have to leave my mark on a wall as she steps out and get a towel to clean up. So next time you're laying face up and you see dried pearls on the ceiling or high on a wall, you'll know Tidelover wuz here..

[QUOTE=TideLover;1933434]Mr. Houling owns H, Hoover FA, and Houling in Vestavia. I went in and he was there along with two girls from Hoover FA. Hour massage is 75, there is no ts and I saw four massage rooms, 3 with curtain doors and one with regular door. Massage wasn't great and I had to be draped the whole time. There wasn't even a tease. I won't be going back for 75, especially when you can go to Panda for 50.[/QUOTE]Is that the tubby guy?

[QUOTE=Bully;1934094]Is that the tubby guy?[/QUOTE]He's older guy I'd say late 60's.

Has anyone been to see this provider, her add sounds iteresting. She's got a local number!

Looking for a report before I take a chance.

Tug.

[QUOTE=RubnTugn;1937332]Has anyone been to see this provider, her add sounds iteresting. She's got a local number!

Looking for a report before I take a chance.

Tug.[/QUOTE]I've called multiple times and no answer or option to leave VM. I've texted and got response a week later.. So no I haven't.

That's funny. I tried to call her a few days ago and got no answer and no VM had been set up. No call back or nothing. Anyway went to Foot as I wanted to try Halen out. I called beforehand to make sure she was there. When I got there the small chick I had last time seemed really disapointed that I was seeing someone else. I had to piss when I got there and she led me all the way back to the bathroom, holding my hand, and being very flirtatious. You'll never figure these girls out, so why try. told her I wanted an hour. Anyway Halen comes in. She's probably in her 40's. Not bad. Has a nice tight figure. I wasn't draped when she came in and she put the sheet over my ass and legs. My first thought was "great, another ball buster." Massage was so-so. More of a firm rub, than anything clinical. She gets down to my lower half and leaves the sheet on to massage. After about 2-3 minutes of this I just take the sheet and throw it right off. She didn't put it back on and continued to massage. It had felt about that time to flip over and all of a sudden she says something that resembled "more time." Isaid "excuse me" and she pulls out 2 sheets of paper out of her pocket that had 4-5 different amounts of time. Such as 15 min, 30, etc. I said "what the hell is that?" And when I say she knows zero English, it would be an understatement. I looked at the clock and I had been there about 40 mins, and tried to tell her that with a 60 min massage, you get 30 min front, and 30 back. Well, trying to get her to understand that, it would've been easier to teach Calculus to a newborn. All sshe kept saying was more time and pointing at this paper. At this point I was beginning to get a little pissed. Well, she leaves and call out something in Chinese or whatever she was speaking. Well in comes another woman, who btw was hot as shit. I don't know who she was but she was fine. Was wearing a tight t-shirt and had some big fucking titties. Anyway these two go to jabbring back and forth. Big tittied girl tells me "more time" and I tell her I had 60 min and my time wasn't up. She didn't do anything on the frontside. Well she jabbers at her again then leaves and Halen motions to turn over. So I do and she starts with the face massage and scalp deal, which is the least of my reasons for being there. And again I'm draped. After 5 min or so, she gives me the paper and starts with the more time shit again. At that point I just got up, threw the sheet of and pointed at my dick, and motioned her over. I'm sitting at the edge of the table and she is in the middle of me holding a towel around my unit, as if there was going to be overspray. I knew she wasn't going to understand a damn word I said, so I just pointe at her tits and to my surprise, she lifted her shirt up and I proceeded to suck on her titties. Meanwhile she takes my cock in her hand, albeit coverd with a towel and jacks on it a little bit. I made a motion, waving off the towel and she takes it incovered for a stroke or 10. When she was doing that I motioned at her belt, and again to my surprise she undid her belt and pulled her pants and her pantied down very slightly. Just far enough where I could play with her button and finger bang her some. After about 3-4 min of this she starts to pull up her pants, pull her shirt down and points at the clock. At this point I had been there past an hour. I knew that in about a min or so I was going to be a little lighter. I motioned her back over and she starts jacking and in about 45 secs, I completely ruin one of their towels. She goes over and gets a hot towel, hands it to me and starts asking for a tip. Well, I wasn't going tot tell her all I had was $60. So I just motion ok and get dressed. When i got done she's waiting outside and still asking about a tip.Well, nothing I could do. Should've had one for her, but what the hell. We go up to the counter and small girl says "59" and I give her $60 and drink my cup of water. Well Halen comes over and starts pointing at the fucking at the fucking price list again and small girl says "have a nice evening." I say thank you and start to leave. And from the time I got arms length from the door to about the steps, all I heard behind me was "tip", "tip", "tip" and at that point I was the one that couldn't understand English. So give it a shot. Maybe there is more to be had with her. Maybe buying extra time will lead to something else. who knows. At least she might not be so worried about looking at the clock.
QUOTE=RubnTugn;1937332]Has anyone been to see this provider, her add sounds iteresting. She's got a local number!

Looking for a report before I take a chance.

Tug.[/QUOTE]

So up for thanksgiving, if I go to foot is there any suggestions or someone I should ask for? Thanks on advance for the advice.

Went for just a massage today got a new chick. Her massage was terrible rubbing the same place over and over. Then on the ts as soon as she saw my cock she was done.

So I went to foot and Hoover had Fiona hour and a half massage with the scrub and when I answed for anymore she said no. Decent massage lots of teasing which is a little bit frustrating.

[QUOTE=PentDragon5;1940809]So I went to foot and Hoover had Fiona hour and a half massage with the scrub and when I answed for anymore she said no. Decent massage lots of teasing which is a little bit frustrating.[/QUOTE]Yes, that's about all you get. Not the mention the rib crushing massage with her feet. Then on your back, she'll tease like hell.

[QUOTE=DirtySouth19;1940630]Went for just a massage today got a new chick. Her massage was terrible rubbing the same place over and over. Then on the ts as soon as she saw my cock she was done.[/QUOTE]Thanks, that just confirms why I'm Done with that place.

[QUOTE=TideLover;1940925]Yes, that's about all you get. Not the mention the rib crushing massage with her feet. Then on your back, she'll tease like hell.[/QUOTE]Have had Fiona a couple of times. The rough massage for me was what I wanted so it was fine. She definitely will put the tease on but just can't / won't grasp the pointer during massage but will a little with the glove during ts. Will do a nice upper groin rub and rub the twins a little while I finished the pointer and that also was fine cause I hate leaving blue.

Why didn't you try Halen? I gave ya'll the inside info. That Fiona chick I think is related to the owner. Or maybe the owner doesn't know wha goes on there sometimes. The last time I saw Fiona there was an older man and woman there when I arrived and Fiona was on her best behavior. Everything covered. Legit deal. Maybe mommy and daddy was there that day.

[QUOTE=PentDragon5;1940809]So I went to foot and Hoover had Fiona hour and a half massage with the scrub and when I answed for anymore she said no. Decent massage lots of teasing which is a little bit frustrating.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=SpiderMan;1941607]Why didn't you try Halen? I gave ya'll the inside info. That Fiona chick I think is related to the owner. Or maybe the owner doesn't know wha goes on there sometimes. The last time I saw Fiona there was an older man and woman there when I arrived and Fiona was on her best behavior. Everything covered. Legit deal. Maybe mommy and daddy was there that day.[/QUOTE]Halen don't work there anymore.

I believe I'm done going to this place. It has the best ts around but the massage quality sux donkey balls. I went in and got the hour, young chick comes in to give massage. She sits on my ass as she rubs my back, which wasn't too bad. Then she slides down and sits between my legs and uses her feet on my ass that is very half passed.. I became bord after 5 minutes on that. Then she get off the table and does a quick leg rub and spends a lot of time on my feet, so much time, she falls asleep. I wake her, she says flip over and does quick massage on my head and face and little chest and belly. Then says done, no leg / thigh rub at all..WTF.

The massage isn't good enough to warrant going back. If I knew for a fact that nothing was available except a good massage and a good, fun tease (there is a difference between a good tease and a frustrating one) I'd still probably frequent the place for the massage and atmosphere. With foot you get none of the above.

[QUOTE=TideLover;1947835]I believe I'm done going to this place. It has the best ts around but the massage quality sux donkey balls. I went in and got the hour, young chick comes in to give massage. She sits on my ass as she rubs my back, which wasn't too bad. Then she slides down and sits between my legs and uses her feet on my ass that is very half passed.. I became bord after 5 minutes on that. Then she get off the table and does a quick leg rub and spends a lot of time on my feet, so much time, she falls asleep. I wake her, she says flip over and does quick massage on my head and face and little chest and belly. Then says done, no leg / thigh rub at all..WTF.[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Zodrocket;1948805]The massage isn't good enough to warrant going back. If I knew for a fact that nothing was available except a good massage and a good, fun tease (there is a difference between a good tease and a frustrating one) I'd still probably frequent the place for the massage and atmosphere. With foot you get none of the above.[/QUOTE]I went to check out a certain one that was no longer there. Should have left after I walked in and went to my ace in the hole. I do like variety, and that will cost me many frustrations and $.

[QUOTE=Zodrocket;1948805]The massage isn't good enough to warrant going back. If I knew for a fact that nothing was available except a good massage and a good, fun tease (there is a difference between a good tease and a frustrating one) I'd still probably frequent the place for the massage and atmosphere. With foot you get none of the above.[/QUOTE]Agreed, agreed. Love the table shower, but the massage quality is the worst of the similar places in town, by far. The reliance on the "back-walking" thing (which I don't particularly enjoy or find arousing) is its downfall. I won't be back.

The weirdness with the one girl and the "you massage me now?" thing, which I and others have experienced, is also quite bizarre. Fuck that.- I'm not paying you to let me massage your back. Let me massage your front, and maybe we'll talk.

Not sure if she is the girl in those pics but she is a big tall AA girl and overall doesn't look too bad. But don't waste your time and money on this one if you're looking for a good or even a decent rub down. Massage is non existence and service sucked. She constantly paused to answer her damn phone to book more sessions. For one bill I got 5 minutes of rub on my back and a CBJ after flip.

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/all-frills-no-gimmicks-80-incalls-available-now-21/9033373[/URL]

[QUOTE=DuckHed;1955372]Not sure if she is the girl in those pics but she is a big tall AA girl and overall doesn't look too bad. But don't waste your time and money on this one if you're looking for a good or even a decent rub down. Massage is non existence and service sucked. She constantly paused to answer her damn phone to book more sessions. For one bill I got 5 minutes of rub on my back and a CBJ after flip.

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/all-frills-no-gimmicks-80-incalls-available-now-21/9033373[/URL][/QUOTE]This is definitely the kind of providers that need to be avoided at all cost. Nothing but a rip-off.

[QUOTE=DuckHed;1955372]Not sure if she is the girl in those pics but she is a big tall AA girl and overall doesn't look too bad. But don't waste your time and money on this one if you're looking for a good or even a decent rub down. Massage is non existence and service sucked. She constantly paused to answer her damn phone to book more sessions. For one bill I got 5 minutes of rub on my back and a CBJ after flip.

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/all-frills-no-gimmicks-80-incalls-available-now-21/9033373[/URL][/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Soccer2010]This one looked okay so out of curiosity I gave a call. She said she is the girl in the pics and her massage is 80 for a full hour so I went for it. That was a mistake. Not sure if she was the same girl as the one in the pics but she was not bad looking. Her massage sucked. I was ready to leave after She rubbed my back for maybe 5 mins. I turned over. She gave me a option of hj or CBJ for ending. I went for the latter. It was decent. Again there was no massage so for 80 I got a CBJ. Before i left She said she has upgrades, I said maybe next time.
Just in case you were wondering about this one!!

This what he had to say last week about Charm

Any experience with this one?

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/hot-college-girl-21/9172871[/URL]

Saw Jennifer the last 2 visits. Very attractive, great DD naturals, decent massage, on the flip Russian, CBJ which was excellent, her spread on table me standing, then doggie and finished cowgirl. $60 plus $120 Definitely will repeat and have! Likes to talk dirty as well.

Don't do it. She's huge, nasty and in a disgusting part of town.

[QUOTE=Drsmooth1;1956920]Any experience with this one?

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/FemaleEscorts/hot-college-girl-21/9172871[/URL][/QUOTE]

Was going to TOFTT but I couldn't get her to answer her phone or reply to my texts.

I'm thinking she may not be real. Anyone has anything on this one?

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/blissful-sensual-touch-full-body-massage-28/7824287[/URL]

[QUOTE=DuckHed;1959227]Was going to TOFTT but I couldn't get her to answer her phone or reply to my texts.

I'm thinking she may not be real. Anyone has anything on this one?

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/blissful-sensual-touch-full-body-massage-28/7824287[/URL][/QUOTE]I saw her back in the summer.. Not her in the pics and she will upsell you on the ending.

Would not repeat.

[QUOTE=TwoWheelSx4;1959821]I saw her back in the summer.. Not her in the pics and she will upsell you on the ending.
Would not repeat.[/QUOTE]Asks for $125 and upsells on the ending. Fuck that!

Thanks man. You just saved me some dough!

I have seen a few escorts on BP and been following the reviews on soft hands girls. So I called Tiffany London to se about making an apointment and what all it entailed. She said $.40 for message plus $50 for her to be nude. No BJ unless I wanted FS which is $500. She seemed awesome to be with smart sexy and all but. If for only $10 dollars more I can have a FS HOTTY why would I want a massage. Not asking to be a smart guy, just feel like I may be missing something.

[QUOTE=Bham451;1959928]I have seen a few escorts on BP and been following the reviews on soft hands girls. So I called Tiffany London to se about making an apointment and what all it entailed. She said $.40 for message plus $50 for her to be nude. No BJ unless I wanted FS which is $500. She seemed awesome to be with smart sexy and all but. If for only $10 dollars more I can have a FS HOTTY why would I want a massage. Not asking to be a smart guy, just feel like I may be missing something.[/QUOTE]I saw her once several months ago. She is fat, a BBW with huge tits. She was very personable and massage quality was decent but nothing to write home about. For 140 she gave a 45 min massage with HJ ending and she exposed her tits after the flip. To be honest it would have not hurt my feelings if she had kept them covered. Overall Not good enough for repeat at that price.

She asked you for 50 more to be nude. Fuck that, wouldn't care to see that fat ass naked anyway. And 500 for FS? What was she smoking? She must be out of her fucking mind, who wants to fuck that fat ass anyway. Or maybe she just didn't want to do it.

Like you said there are others to choose from for FS. She ain't for that!

She comes to Bham often so as other new nomads mostly from Atlanta. The business must be good for them here in Bham. Problem is most are worthless!! The good ones don't have to travel ai guess.

I like a good sensual rub with a little extra every now and then but don't care to drop more than 100 or maybe 120.

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/caring-massages-and-here-a-very-short-visit-37/5961093[/URL]

Have seen this one a couple of times. Bham local; pics in the ad are indeed hers. She has a killer body for her age. Said she is a body trainer which seemed to be true. She has big mm boobs. The sensual massage and body to body rub was decent. After the flip she got totally nude, touching her all over was encouraged and the HJ ending was slow and awesome.

[URL]http://birmingham.backpage.com/BodyRubs/massage-tantra-therapeutic-limited-appointments-36/7605763[/URL]