The Sands, Tuesday night.
Okay, so finally made it out to Sands post-Jiggles shutdown. I'd heard through the grapevine that it was a hot game in town, for mileage and for the cream of the crop of Rick's / Honey's still hanging in there.
Here's the thing: I'd only been to the Sands once before, about 3 years ago (I reviewed it here, actually) and was unimpressed. I'd gone in on a Friday or Saturday, and while the physical club was nice and well-maintained, there were very few dancers and they were all older women. I still got decent FS, but didn't go back because I could get that, or BBBJ, at Rick's at the time with a younger, hotter dancer.
Flash forward to 2011, and with Jiggles closing the Sands is one of only 3 independent clubs left; the Dancing Bare is allegedly a horrible dive, and Centerfolds is a joke of a club with piss-poor management. So I mosey into the Sands on a Tuesday night. I see on their website that they have Anya here, but she's not working. There are about 5 dancers total.
# Ambience:
The club itself is physically nice and in good repair; it looks like a newer Deja Vu, before the perpetually unwashed carpets get filthy. They don't charge cover or dick around with coming or going in and out, but you do have to buy a $10 drink (with a free refill) so that's basically the cover.
The stage show is intermittent; they'll have 3-4 dancers in a row then breaks of several songs in between, likely because they have so few dancers. The DJ is basically non-existent; he "DJ'ed" for a song or two, but after that the next dancer would DJ before going up herself. That's. Weird. Also, the songs are basically full length but they don't bleed from one to the next, and there is an incredibly awkward silence for 30 seconds in between songs, which they seem to pick from the jukebox by the bar. If you're talking to a dancer, as soon as the song ends EVERYONE can hear you. Be aware of that.
The "lady drinks" thing is annoying as fuck. If a dancer sits by you, or even takes you to the VIP, the lady manager follows asking about "buying the lady a drink". SexyTina who was there (from tnaboard. Com and jiggles) said that basically, for every drink they sell, they get $6 off rent, so "It really helps us out!" Shut the fuck up. You want financial assistance? Then dance for me and make it awesome; if you dance like a pro, you'll do well enough that the $6 'commission' is irrelevant. I'd think any self-respecting dancer would prefer to have a flat rate rent, as opposed to a side-gig as soda saleswoman.
# Dancers:
Okay, so on to the dancers themselves, and their dances. The girls have colluded so they all only offer $40 dances. I didn't bother trying to lowball because I only got one dance each from 2 different girls before leaving. The dancers weren't too bad- Centerfolds still takes the cake with basically cryptkeeper-like ancient dancers- although no one was amazing.
One is SexyTina from TNAboard. Com who briefly worked at Jiggles (had low mileage dances there, despite being a provider outside of the club). I didn't even dance with her at the Sands; she approached me but her attitude was. Off. I'd never seen her as a provider, and only once at Jiggles before it closed, but she sat down and just talked and talked, negative attitude, telling me how Seattle people suck, blah blah blah. Wow. Way to put me in the mood. No interest, although given that the one time I'd seen her at Jiggles she was low mileage- again this girl is or at least was a PROVIDER who had sex for money- I don't think I missed out.
I had an intel source tell me to look for Milla (late 30's, somewhat curvy, long black hair) who was there, and while she had killer red lipstick that I foolishly hoped meant "Oral queen", based on my one $40 dance (where she'd lift up her bikini, my hand would reach for tit, and she'd promptly pull the bikini down) I didn't explore further. The intel source said she was low mileage at Rick's when he knew her, but that she also got arrested for prostitution at one point. But from what I can tell, very low mileage dancer.
The other person I danced with was Alana, a slender dancer from Turkey. Decent enough bod, but her dances were also very low mileage and minimal contact. There's no passion there, although she lightly touched my dick through my sweats, and it felt mechanical as hell. She oddly told me that the daytime dancers are super hot. Wow, that's odd- usually it's the nighttime girls who are hot, and I've never heard a dancer say basically "You should come when I'm not around, you'll enjoy it more".
Also had this amusing exchange, after the first dance ended:
Her: Shall I keep going?
Me: Well, where do we go from here?
Her: What do you mean? What are you looking for?
Me: Well. Oral for starters.
Her: Well, the dances get better the more you get, but I don't get crazy.
Me: Thank you very much, here's your $40.
I had a somewhat similar experience with Milla but didn't bother asking her for extras; her poor dancing and my hints of "Where do we go from here" or "What more can we do?" were rebuffed without even acknowledging what I was asking for, so I didn't press.
# Pros:
Good looking club. No cover, although your first drink is $10 with a free refill, so. Cover is $10.
Reasonably private VIP; no patrolling managers, although the open seating means you aren't as private as at the awesome Jiggles or even Rick's.
Hey, there's a pool table!
# Cons:
Bathrooms have doorless stalls. Seriously, you low-rent jackals at Sands and Centerfolds: make usable bathrooms. The fuck is your problem?
Apparently low mileage, which is inexcusable when the signs say "$20 dance" and all the dancers collude to 'start' at $40.
The "lady drinks". Just charge them a flat rate on rent, you jackals!
This place is out there; Ballard is rather remote, and for the time it took to get there and back, it just isn't worth the trek out.
# Summary:
Overall, the Sands was a disappointment: it's reputation used to be "super high mileage, a touch pricey, but the women will be older". Now the mileage seems to be gone, so. What's the point? Unless a vet PMs me a specific day to show up, for a specific dancer, this "$40 near-air dance" is not going to work for me. For $40 / dance, they should be the best of Rick's on display, not tired women who can't figure out that with the low foot traffic, getting a steady customer base is your only hope- and your product as it is now is pretty lousy.
Re: The Sands, Tuesday night.
Huge Kudos to you, Ricksfan, for that epic report.
The Sands always reminded me of the Black Lodge in Twin Peaks. A place to feel bored or afraid. They've always done that drinks hustle; it's their signature scam.
The situation is bad now, but it'll change. City regimes come and go. Also, the clubs are in a transition period. Someone will meet the demand eventually.
