RE: Wouldn; t it be nice.
[QUOTE=Gator145;2258527]Hey, I'm all for this. I can see myself waking up and thinking I could go for some French. Now where did I put Monique's number. Ahhh here it is right in the hooker anonymous data base. So I dial her up and she answers. Tell her what I'm thinking and the first thing out of her mouth is the dick she's sucking. Second thing is "I'm sick, I need to get well".
Or how about a little Greek just to get the day off on the right foot. Oh well wouldn't that be a perfect world. Hell maybe they could stop at Starbucks on their way over and get me one of those fancy coffee drinks to fit the moment. Maybe stop at Dunkin Donuts pick up a breakfast sandwich.
The door bell rings you open the door in your nice silk robe. Beautiful day, sun is shinning. There she is in all her glory. A little blood dripping from the portion of her faces he was just picking in somebody's car mirror. She's got on the same sweat pants you remember her in three weeks ago when you first saw her nodding on the side steps of the Chinese store at Kensington and Cambria. Oh yeah, the memories. That's where you fell in love. She was sucking an Egg roll as she nodded off to somewhere only she knows. The sneaks still have the dog shit on them she slipped in trying to get to the step. She says " I hope you don't mind I ate some of your sandwich. " She mentions she picked you up a paper. You look at it and it's six days old and yellow. But that's ok you had other things on your mind besides reading your neighbors yellow newspaper. You want sex and she's not exactly your dream girl, but she's here. Her hair is a little messed but what the hell.
You both decide the best way to approach this is to start her off with a shower. She thinks this is wonderful as she hasn't had one in weeks.
You send her to the bathroom and she starts the process of beautifying what just can't be beautified. But she's going to give it a go anyway.
While she's "getting ready". You toss out the half eaten sandwich and grab your coffee. Shit. Coffee's cold and when did Starbucks start using 7-11 cups. Oh well. So you make the most of it. Tastes like something they got from those five gallon buckets in the abando. So that goes down the sink. So far the day's not going good at all.
She spends the next two and a half hours in the bathroom. You open the door to check on her and she didn't even get in the shower yet. Crack pipe is broken on the floor. She's in a lump on the floor tangled in the clothes she's trying to get off. Damn, you notice five or six bed bugs crawling out of the layers of clothes she has on. And what the hell is that smell?
At that point you decide the best thing to do is get her the hell out of your house and back in her own environment. Problem is you can't wake her up. She is in deep in coma like sleep. Your bathroom floor is the softest thing she has slept on in months. She's going to take advantage of that.
Another two hours goes by and you finally wake her up. You give her some lame excuse as to why she has to leave. Land lord is on his way over and you don't want her to get caught there. So being the professional she is, she says you have to give her something for her time, the coffee and sandwich. So you peel off twenty dollars and tell her she has to go. Of course she asks you for a tip. You stuff another five bucks in her dirty hand and she bolts out the door toward the crack store. Boy are you glad she's gone. Now you got to figure out how to get dog shit out of the carpet. The bathroom is a mess. Plus you have things crawling all over the place. Never did get that French or Greek. Well guess you got to cruise the Ave now.
So my friend, your concept is a noble one. It just wouldn't work. Not to mention it's not legal. Like paying for pussy.
This of course is just an observation. Me, I'm just an 'OL Gator.[/QUOTE]Gator, I Will Probably be forced to have to bring Criminal proceedings against you. I have enough evidence in the above Paragraphs to Conclusively PROVE that you obviously Have hidden cameras all over my House! (IE: Wow. ! What an incredibly concise and accurate account of Bringing home 90% of the Honeys. Kudos.) P.S. - If someone is not 100% sure what "G" is talking about- I suggest you go re-read this twice. And Heed his tale.
Visiting from the mile high city
Hi all.
I'm visiting next week from denver. Staying downtown?/ near UPen.
No car.
Any action around there or anyone with digits to share. Or AMPs?
Happy to reciprocate when you visit my fair city.
A.