Massage Parlor Reports

[QUOTE=Goat Trotter]C'mon man RTFF!! There have been several post offering first timer advice. WTF is with you guys asking the same questions over and over.[/QUOTE]

GT, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink it.

Based on the guys post, he already did some homework. Now if he was paying attention, he would have enough info to take his first step. Don't know why he is asking for more. Especially with the most recent posts about the place he is interested in trying.

Go for it dude, then write a review.

Fair enough, in fact I did find one first timer advice post, BACK ON PAGE 13. So excuse me for trying to play by your guys' rules. Way to roll out the welcome mat.

Assman7

Here is a link that you may find of interest -
[url]www.usasexguide.info/forum/showthread.php?p=331916&highlight=amps#post331916[/url]

It's an old link but this discussion reminded me of it. It's geared towards AMPs (not EMPs), but I think you will find the info is still helpful. After you read RealFun's comments, make sure that when you finally go that you adjust for inflation. For current rates do your homework again. And enjoy.

I have been going for massages for over 30 years, When it comes to tipping If the MT askes for money, in the begining I may, now I never go back. I only go back if they don't ask. First the massage has to be good.

I have gotten a TS an HJ for under 100 FS for under 100 what makes it different is I go to the same places if they are no good don't even tip, if they answer the phone don't tip, The reason I watch what I say on this sight is a lot of places have shut down,

There are some that are real good, out there just try, I have even gotten free massages I just tip. I made many mistakes, Now I just go to get a good massage This is just a little feedback.

Tipping is always an option, Most all will get at least half of what you pay unless they are a student, good luck.

[QUOTE=Assman7]Greetings gentlemen,
What should I expect? Other than a great finish of course.[/QUOTE]

You are already going in with unrealistic expectations. YMMV, YMMV, YMMV. Whatever happens in there is not going to be as wild or as exotic or as fantastic as you have already built it up to be. Just go in, relax, don't expect anything, and let nature take its course. If something happens, great. If not, chalk it up as TOFTT, and then go back again in two weeks with a new attitude and they will say "Welcome Back" and maybe something will happen this time. It is the great mystery of EMPS and AMPS.

Thanks fellas. I totally understand that YMMV, and I'm okay with that. I wasn't expecting something of roman proportions. I actually just got back from there and I'm ready to report before I forget everything that happened. First off, I love the location. Secondly, as soon as I walked in I was greeted by a pretty young blond lady named Maggie. I told her about the ad I saw on CL and she confirmed it so that's what I went with. It certainly wasn't very busy in there so I didn't know who I'the get. It turns out it was her. This was not a bad thing as it turned out because she actually gave very pleasant conversation. In fact she seems like the type of girl that you'the want as a gf if you met her anywhere else.

I started asking questions about the place and how long she'the been there, etc. Etc. She told me two years, so I made small talk for the first 30 minutes and it was pretty fun. The massage wasn't so great, it felt like she knew what she was doing but not nearly strong enough to make it sensational. So in the second half hour I asked her how many clients she saw per day and so on, then I asked if any of them had ever gotten in trouble with her. She said no not really, so I pressed a little by asking if they'the ever asked for extra stuff and if so did she (I said jokingly) kick them out in to the street naked. She laughed and said no but that she just doesn't do that stuff or that she wouldn't do that (I had trouble hearing her a little).

So to break a bit of the awkward tension I asked her what the funniest thing she's ever seen was. She told me she hadn't seen anything really. I figured this was BS but I made her laugh by acting disappointed about it. I asked her what other services where offered by them and she listed all the types of massages. I figured I should just let it go and enjoy the rest of the session. As I was walking to the table shower room I nearly ran into another of the girls there and man was she a 10. I should ask for her next time.

Anyway, Maggie encouraged me to come back and I told her I would. Does anyone know anything about her? I think it would benefit me to become a regular, to her perhaps, but I'the also like to see who else works there. So that was my first trip. How's that for drinking the water?

[QUOTE=Assman7]Greetings gentlemen,

It's been interesting reading your posts and doing my research. I think I've benefited greatly from all your tips so far. I haven't actually gone hobbying yet but I'm looking forward to my first trip to an EMP with extras. I'm really interested in going to Lisunia's. It sounds fantastic and reasonably priced. Is there any advice you'the give someone just starting out? I don't want to go in there and say something or do something stupid that would ruin everything for everybody. What should I expect? Other than a great finish of course.[/QUOTE]

Expect a Jessica Alba or Angelina Jolie look-alike. If it is an AMP she will look like Sung Hi Lee.

They will come in the room with very little on and proceed to give you a massage that will elimate all of your body's aches and pains. Expect your golf score to drop by a few strokes and you will be able to run faster and jump higher.

After the massage, they will make passionate love to you. Tips are optional, but they are usually just happy that they had the opportunity to make love to you. Sometimes they will cook you a 5 star meal as well.

Peace.

Assman7

Nice post/review, especially considering all the sh*t you were taking. I will say that while it was good you struck up a conversation and established a rapport with her, the comments about extras and whatnot may have made her think you LE. Maybe, maybe not.

If you do a search on Maggie you will see that Shrooms saw her and a hr is possible, but he also comment on her lacking massage, but that his hands were free to roam. Things to keep in mind when you go back.

[QUOTE=Basil Fomine]I might ask ,"How long have you had to pay for sex?"[/QUOTE]


Dude, you have been paying for sex all of your life. Add up the dinners, the movies, the flowers, the phone calls, etc, etc. WE just skip all that BS, go right for the pussy that you are begging/hoping for, and then we pay her to leave. No emotional BS. no entanglements, we still get the thrill of the chase and then move on to the next one with out having to explain why.

good one assman. at least you took the first step.
next time ease up on the questioning. if anything, just have some normal conversation. and read the previous reports about that place. take the mental notes with you next time.

[QUOTE=Assman7]Thanks fellas. I totally understand that YMMV, and I'm okay with that. I wasn't expecting something of roman proportions. I actually just got back from there and I'm ready to report before I forget everything that happened. First off, I love the location. Secondly, as soon as I walked in I was greeted by a pretty young blond lady named Maggie. I told her about the ad I saw on CL and she confirmed it so that's what I went with. It certainly wasn't very busy in there so I didn't know who I'the get. It turns out it was her. This was not a bad thing as it turned out because she actually gave very pleasant conversation. In fact she seems like the type of girl that you'the want as a gf if you met her anywhere else.

I started asking questions about the place and how long she'the been there, etc. Etc. She told me two years, so I made small talk for the first 30 minutes and it was pretty fun. The massage wasn't so great, it felt like she knew what she was doing but not nearly strong enough to make it sensational. So in the second half hour I asked her how many clients she saw per day and so on, then I asked if any of them had ever gotten in trouble with her. She said no not really, so I pressed a little by asking if they'the ever asked for extra stuff and if so did she (I said jokingly) kick them out in to the street naked. She laughed and said no but that she just doesn't do that stuff or that she wouldn't do that (I had trouble hearing her a little).

So to break a bit of the awkward tension I asked her what the funniest thing she's ever seen was. She told me she hadn't seen anything really. I figured this was BS but I made her laugh by acting disappointed about it. I asked her what other services where offered by them and she listed all the types of massages. I figured I should just let it go and enjoy the rest of the session. As I was walking to the table shower room I nearly ran into another of the girls there and man was she a 10. I should ask for her next time.

Anyway, Maggie encouraged me to come back and I told her I would. Does anyone know anything about her? I think it would benefit me to become a regular, to her perhaps, but I'the also like to see who else works there. So that was my first trip. How's that for drinking the water?[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=BadAz Mofo]Assman7

Nice post/review, especially considering all the sh*t you were taking. I will say that while it was good you struck up a conversation and established a rapport with her, the comments about extras and whatnot may have made her think you LE. Maybe, maybe not.

If you do a search on Maggie you will see that Shrooms saw her and a hr is possible, but he also comment on her lacking massage, but that his hands were free to roam. Things to keep in mind when you go back.[/QUOTE]Thanks BadAz Mofo. I was initially a little miffed after reading his review. I had written the same exact thing (maybe a little more detailed) a few days ago. Good to know that someone actually reads my posts. I threw out specifics and so it should have been a given.

[QUOTE=Basil Fomine]I expected better responses to my original post. So you guys think these girls who work in asian massage parlors wait their whole life so they can make it to America to give lonely jackasses like yourselves handjobs. That's not delusional thinking at all. Keep it up. I mean after all ,how could anyone be forced to do anything they wouldn't want to do. Talk about dumb. And what difference does it make how many posts i have out here? Is there an award for the most?[/QUOTE]

When was your first BJ?

How did it tatse?

Assman7 = LE?

Basil Fomine = serial killler?

F you to both of you creeps and your sleezy PM's.

Senior members, it is time to get Jackson involved.

[QUOTE=PeoplesElbow]Assman7 = LE?

Basil Fomine = serial killler?

F you to both of you creeps and your sleezy PM's.

Senior members, it is time to get Jackson involved.[/QUOTE]
I've already notified Jackson regarding BF. Should be just a matter of time.

First things first, thanks for the feedback be it positive or negative. I did feel like I should not have asked her so many questions, and I did my best to space them out over the period of the hour, but I did get the vibe that the possibility for roaming hands was there, on my part anyway. I took the steam then realized I made the wrong choice when I couldn't breathe. I'm glad I shut up when I did though. In fact, as I said, I had fun and I will be going back there.

As for you guys that are being jerks, that's fine, I can handle the hazing however, if I write you back with a good burn and piss you off don't go crying to your mod about it, just ignore me like I ignore you. (yes I'm looking at you Mr. Most pointless move in wrestling history ever) And I understand that as long as you've been here it's easy to forget that you were once new as well. But whatever, if I bug you that much, just put me on your ignore list. I have no problem with that. At least I'm not being considered a serial killer.

So, that's that with that, and if any of you (and some already did) have specific questions, PM me. I'll get back to you quick. Thanks again.