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The 2 biggest issues I see are the length of time the data can be retained and sharing of data with third parties. Data should not be retained more than it would take to solve a crime. 3 months should be plenty of time. Second, if data can be shared with third parties, restrictions placed on LE would be irrelevant. The opportunity for abuse is endless.
Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]I can understand she knows you're married, but how does she know who your wife is, and, how to contact her? How much information do you share with these girls?
Extortion / ikˈstrSH (601 and / the practice of obtaining something, especially money, through force or threats.
Blackmail /712;blakˌmāl / the action, treated as a criminal offense, of demanding money from a person in return for not revealing compromising or injurious information about that person.
Negotiate / andə712;609;333;SHē716;257;t / try to reach an agreement or compromise by discussion with others.
1. Don't be afraid to ask for what you want. 2. Shut up and listen. 3. Do your homework. 4. Always be willing to walk away. 5. Don't be in a hurry. 6. Aim high and expect the best outcome. 7. Focus on the other side's pressure, not yours. 8. Show the other person how their needs will be met. 9. Don't give anything away without getting something in return. 10. Don't take the issues or the other person's behavior personally. I am not married but if I was and wanted to protect my marriage from the info, the gloves come off and nothing is too extreme. Contact a attorney to protect yourself in the event the damaging info becomes known to married other. Share the name of provider" thru private message" so others don't get preyed on also.
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]If you hire an attorney he will be bound by confidentiality rules and he can discretely tell this provider the punishments for blackmail. He will tell her in no uncertain terms that if she follows through with the blackmail you may get divorced but your divorce will be over before she gets out of prison.
Discretely save the blackmail threats. Give your attorney the information you have on her and he will find out her real background using Lexis / Nexis which will give him ammunition to talk about when he contacts her'.
In the future don't give out real information.
RIL.
[QUOTE=Resipsaloquito;2438484]If you hire an attorney he will be bound by confidentiality rules and he can discretely tell this provider the punishments for blackmail. He will tell her in no uncertain terms that if she follows through with the blackmail you may get divorced but your divorce will be over before she gets out of prison.
Discretely save the blackmail threats. Give your attorney the information you have on her and he will find out her real background using Lexis / Nexis which will give him ammunition to talk about when he contacts her'.
In the future don't give out real information.
RIL.[/QUOTE]Hire an attorney? Thats funny. Sounds like this girl is talking out her ass, and wants to see if he'll take the bait. She's probably an addict, I'm sure she's a master mind when it comes to extortion.
How about telling the board who this provider is so that the rest of us stay clear of her and save us the grief that your going through. Sorry to hear that you are having to put up with this BS.
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]
No Alibis as a point in that you have to make the judgment upfront whether you believr she is serior about this or as he so aptly states she is "talking out of her ass. ".
My initial response was based on the belief that you already concluded she could and would follow through with her extortion threats and wanted to be proactive. However, bearing in mind that hiring an attorney will cost some serious mongering cash you should do the evaluation of her ability to follow through with the threats. Of course, being proactive takes that evaluation out the equation.
Under no circumstances pay her a dime as she will only come back for more and will be emboldened to try this scheme with others.
The fact that she is probably stupid as No Alibi imagines is not a positive thing for your situation as my experience is that it is the stupid ones that act irrationally. The fact that she is too stupid to realize she has more to lose than you is not a good thing.
[QUOTE=NoAlibis;2438522]Hire an attorney? Thats funny. Sounds like this girl is talking out her ass, and wants to see if he'll take the bait. She's probably an addict, I'm sure she's a master mind when it comes to extortion.[/QUOTE]My response was to tell her not to contact me again, EVER. She has done so several times, ramping it up each time, telling me she is at FedEx printing up the package she is going to send. I tried to work with her initially. I then asked her how did I have any assurances she would not come knocking again when times get tough. She said this is a one and done. Of course, I can't trust her. If I could I wouldn't be getting threats in the first place.
As bad as this sounds, I was ready to help her but her texts got so nasty so fast, I just said don't contact me again. A real Dr. Jekyll, Mr. Hyde. Couldn't believe it. Bi-polar or something. Blown away. This was someone I had really gone out of the way to help previously.
For those of you who want to know who she is, I am not going to say, but you can probably figure it out by previous correspondence. Also, she has not placed ads anywhere so the likelihood of you encountering her are very low.
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438574]My response was to tell her not to contact me again, EVER. She has done so several times, ramping it up each time, telling me she is at FedEx printing up the package she is going to send. I tried to work with her initially. I then asked her how did I have any assurances she would not come knocking again when times get tough. She said this is a one and done. Of course, I can't trust her. If I could I wouldn't be getting threats in the first place.
As bad as this sounds, I was ready to help her but her texts got so nasty so fast, I just said don't contact me again. A real Dr. Jekyll, Mr. Hyde. Couldn't believe it. Bi-polar or something. Blown away. This was someone I had really gone out of the way to help previously.
For those of you who want to know who she is, I am not going to say, but you can probably figure it out by previous correspondence. Also, she has not placed ads anywhere so the likelihood of you encountering her are very low.[/QUOTE]I'd still like to know how she got so much info on your personal life. Maybe she is bipolar or crazy, but she has to be dealt with appropriately. If it's too the point you state it is, well, I'm just not a bleeding heart liberal, if you get my drift. People dig there own holes. She needs to understand, there's more than one way to skin a cat.
This reminds me of another guy on a different board who stated it was ok to give a girl my employment info. He stated she would only use it to verify me, then disregard it.
[QUOTE=ChickaAmante;2437832]Folks- there has been a rich discussion around this topic in bits and pieces over time. I wonder if one or more of the experts on the topic create a post titled 'rules for data safety' and ensure that all involved follow those to ensure safety in general. For example, delete data as soon as it is generated to omit any lingering trails of crumbs. More like snapchat. Thoughts?[/QUOTE]I have taken an intrest on this topic because my job involvoles data collection and electronics. The only true way to get rid of data is to remove it from the server. Simply removing it from the device does not make it disapere. The only real way to avoid getting in trouble in this digital world is to not do anything you will regret. Not trying to burst any bubbles or worry anyone its just the plain hard truth.
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]Remember the chick that tried to blackmail Rick Pitino he got the police involved if I'm not mistaken the FBI, the lady got 7 years in the prison. Blackmail is a heavy crime and I would let her that you saved all her text and if she doesn't back off the police will be involved.
HL29.
[QUOTE=NoAlibis;2438597]I'd still like to know how she got so much info on your personal life. [/QUOTE]I got lazy. I allowed, through discussions and intimacy, her to obtain info I should have never given. Anyone who has seen a provider for a long time, who you have gotten to know well, probably knows what I am talking about. Casual conversation, allowing them access to things, etc.
I will never make this mistake again. I have learned my lesson and in so doing I hope this educates a few mongers out there to never do what I did, regardless of how well you think you know the person.
A few of you have PMed saying I ought to rough her up but I have kids, a wife, etc. That is just not me anyway. Maybe that is why she is trying this. She knows I would never physically harm her. At any rate, learn from my mistakes, is the bottom line.
[QUOTE=HuntLadys29;2438735]Remember the chick that tried to blackmail Rick Pitino he got the police involved if I'm not mistaken the FBI, the lady got 7 years in the prison. Blackmail is a heavy crime and I would let her that you saved all her text and if she doesn't back off the police will be involved.
HL29.[/QUOTE]HL, I am somewhat familiar with what happened to Pitino. I was not aware the gal got 7 years. Good info I can pass on. Thanks.
I'd contact a lawyer and tell him the deal. If you have her sending you these texts in and writing he may be able to help you scare her off. Blackmail or extortion IS against the law.
In any case I personally wouldn't be held up by someone like this. I make my own bed, so I'd tell her to go for it. Remind her that once she does, you don't really have anything to lose.
It's a shitty situation. I'm curious like the other guy asked. How much info do you share with these girls?
[QUOTE=3-MinutePassion;2438442]Recently, a provider I have seen for some time has threatened me with blackmail. She says she has kept all texts and if I didn't pay X she would copy them and send them to my wife. In corresponding with another monger, I have found I am not the only one she has threatened. Any words of advice?[/QUOTE]