Massage Parlor Reports

I been missing out on dc for a couple of month now due to the unknown safety issuse. but after reading the recent reports, i decided to go and i m very glad that i did.
Went to DC and greeted by the fifth month of the year. she is pretty hot. TS was good, make sure the right area are clean, and mouth wash at the end. Good sign. Back to the room, a long nice 20ish mins front and back massage. On to the main event, DFK, DATY, rim job, 1/2 bbbj(lots of licking, but end up as a cbj) we tried all the positions, she had no complain, and the end she finish me with a hj with dfking me the whole time.

here is a LL scoring system

face 8
body 9 (skinny but with a nice real b+/c-)
attitude 10
massage 10
sexo 9.5 (-.5 for the halfway bbbj)
repeat? def

[QUOTE=ravensfan]here is a LL scoring system

face 8
body 9 (skinny but with a nice real b+/c-)
attitude 10
massage 10
sexo 9.5 (-.5 for the halfway bbbj)
repeat? def[/QUOTE]Wow, another superstar candidate! Love to interview her for the position, well, several positions actually.

Welcome home Raven.
LoveLOS

BTW, Thanks for the PM.

[/QUOTE]Recently LoveLOS and others on this board have posted on AMP providers and experiences and given LARS™ ratings. In the interest of giving newer members a heads up, the following is reposted.

Originally Posted by Laxman #2
With the Winter Olympics upon us, it strikes me that we need to address the problem of subjective scoring. I would like to propose a standard scoring system for the DC AMP scene that I have named the Lax AMP Rating System (“LARS”™) as follows:

0 – I’m going to slit my wrists
1 – Worst ever
2 – I wouldn’t f**k her with ****’s dick
3 – Really bad
4 – Not recommended, avoid
5 – Adequate, standard fare
6 – Good, above average
7 – Superior
8 – Highly recommended, must see
9 – OMFG, best ever
10 – So good I’m keeping this one for myself

Peace and love

Lax[/QUOTE]

Ahem. A LL Rating system indeed!!!!

You'll be hearing from my barristers, wigs and all!

Lax

[QUOTE=Laxman #2]Ahem. A LL Rating system indeed!!!!

You'll be hearing from my barristers, wigs and all!

Lax[/QUOTE]I'm innocent of all wrongdoing (now that's a first)! I merely quoted the gentlemonger who got our "L" handles confused. I must confirm that the rating system is know officially as the LARS scale, with the "L" short for Laxman. I'm sure no malice was intended in the original post.

My main scoring system is to put the tip on the table under my watch© or cellphone©. It seems to work well, and I usually score. :rolleyes: I did modify the system for use on with SW's (you must grade them on a curve to keep your self respect), but Amp Girls don't need that boost.

OTOH, a K-girl with an British Barrister Wig and a black silk robe would be hot taking Little LL up the ass, symbolically speaking... :D Wonder if any of these girls ever do role play? ...but I digress. SMWSLT...

Peace and Love,
LL

[size=0]"under my watch" & "under my cellphone" ©LoveLOS
SMWSLT ©LoveLOS
LARS Scale ©Laxman #2[/size]

[QUOTE=LoveLOS]I'm innocent of all wrongdoing...[/quote]

I doubt that. Highly. Emphasis on Highly. Oh so high(ly) :D

[quote=Loves-anything-with-a-beating-heart-LOS]
OTOH, a K-girl with an British Barrister Wig and a black silk robe would be hot taking Little LL up the ass, symbolically speaking... :D Wonder if any of these girls ever do role play?[/quote]

Now there's an idea. And just in case you're having a problem finding that special role play girl, I happen to have one in stock at the moment. Let me know if you want to place a reserve order.


Bench

Happen to drive by happiness tonight and lights were on and the padlock was gone, anyone know if they are back ?

BSeR,
My brother from another mother, you know me too well. And you're as twisted as me, which I thought was HIGHly doubtful, but I have revised my opinion! We'll talk. [post=522824]Night one in Tampa[/post] was a succex.

On the way to the airport, I occurred to me that I might have time for a half hour session if I could get into and out of the DC in good time. From my reading the fucking forum, I noted a report about a page back that highlighted a spinner. I like spinners. He said possibly under 90 lbs, I have to wonder if she was over 80 lbs. Fuckin-A. Pretty face. Amazing body. Beautiful hair.

A new Ms LoveLOS? Based on a half hour session, I believe so. Will investigate further to negotiate wedding plans. For those who can take the time to RTFF and figure out who and where this girl is, your IQ is probably high enough to help interview the bride. Treat her well, she is a gem.

New Ms LoveLOS 2B:
Face: 10
Body: 9+ (those damn enhanced tits again)
Massagi: (N/A - time crunch on my part)
Attitude: 8+ (Again, half hour session, I'm sure this will improve when we are not rushed)
Sexo: 9
Repeat: As often as I can.

LoveLOS

I was really pushing the big head to get me some since we did not know what Florida held in store for me. I convinced him that even a half hour session would make the day so much better. I was right, as usual.

I really woke up when her clothes came off. OMFG, is that a perfect spinner body or what? WOWZA. BOIING! Shit like that makes the blood really rush to MY head.

LL tells me her eyes are beautiful when she looks up and I am filling that tiny little mouth. All I know is she knows how to use that tiny little mouth. No teeth, which is always a bonus.

As is his kink, LL softens them up with the tounge action, seems to make them want me more. Can't understand why a soft pink thingy that admittedly can work some magic on a clitoris would have anything to do with a pumped up rock hard stud; but it really matters not, it works for me.

Then the main event arrived and I was simply unprepared for what I met. Can we say TIGHT!!! This girl is a top 5! Let me reminisce the original list: First place goes to NOK, the girl from Midnight Bar in Bangkok, then the girl from the Nana Plaza, Next comes Cytrali, Yuki and Lorania in Nogales (in that order). Next in line is Jade in Roanoke. This girl neatly fit between Yuki and Lorania, in the Number five position for tightest pussy that Little LL has had the privilege to explore.

That's all I remember.

Little LL

So you've met the frolicking fairy sprite LL... Very cute and I think she'll grant you wishes if you make her wings sprout...

[QUOTE=LoveLOS]BSeR,
My brother from another mother, you know me too well. And you're as twisted as me, which I thought was HIGHly doubtful, but I have revised my opinion! We'll talk. [post=522824]Night one in Tampa[/post] was a succex.

On the way to the airport, I occurred to me that I might have time for a half hour session if I could get into and out of the DC in good time. From my reading the fucking forum, I noted a report about a page back that highlighted a spinner. I like spinners. He said possibly under 90 lbs, I have to wonder if she was over 80 lbs. Fuckin-A. Pretty face. Amazing body. Beautiful hair.

A new Ms LoveLOS? Based on a half hour session, I believe so. Will investigate further to negotiate wedding plans. For those who can take the time to RTFF and figure out who and where this girl is, your IQ is probably high enough to help interview the bride. Treat her well, she is a gem.

New Ms LoveLOS 2B:
Face: 10
Body: 9+ (those damn enhanced tits again)
Massagi: (N/A - time crunch on my part)
Attitude: 8+ (Again, half hour session, I'm sure this will improve when we are not rushed)
Sexo: 9
Repeat: As often as I can.

LoveLOS[/QUOTE]

Had a horrible experience at the new Gold Spa (1829 M, 2nd floor) today. The girl (she said her name was Coco) provided very poor service and had a terrible attitude. Constantly kept pushing me back to check if wrapper was on. Constantly using kleenex to wipe herself. Just lay there mechanically for the 10 minutes I was there. Even complaining when I approached certain areas. I'm a clean guy, very particular about hygiene and have received very good GFE at Sun and I-bar before. Given the recent reported problems at those places, decided to try something new. Guess I tried the wrong place or received a terrible provider. Left after 10-15 minutes, was getting turned off by the attitude rather than getting turned on.

Like the whopper. Just kidding. Been away and been tired but last night I had a dream that wouldn't let anyone know.

Well, I was at the door of a Green address. Nice to see the weather has warmed up enough where I don't need a coat. Parking was easy and seemed like a true fantasy. I met a series of people. First was an older lady who gave me a hug and was very happy to see me. Like a reunion of sorts. Then I was in a different room and I met a young lady with a Mickey Mouse t-shirt on. Nice girl. Very nice body. Great ass.

I got a nice shower, sat in the sauna for a few and then went back to the second room I was in. Relaxing as hell. Plain and simple. I got a massage from head to foot. Face down was what I can remember. Attention was spent on my back, scalp, legs as well as my feet. Truly amazing.

Next I'm on my back, and the massage continues. More attention to the areas that really need it. Some areas were especially attended to. Next BigJob was with with her tongue. Then we moved on to a kitty that was in the room. Kitty liked the attention.

Moving on, we met with a missionary for talks. Then we took the wiener dog out for a walk. Dog was happy to go. Smiled all the way. On to the last act, I'm leaving. Said goodbye to Mickey, then the older lady. On to the car and home.

I woke up around 12PM and went into the bedroom for some decent sleep. I hate falling asleep on the couch. Kills my back.

I like the New LoveLOS scale. So here goes.

Face: 8
Body: 8
Massage: 9
Attitude: 8
Sexo: 9
Repeat: Definitely...for a dream..it was awesome


Cabbie!

[QUOTE=Jake Jj 1492]So you've met the frolicking fairy sprite LL... Very cute and I think she'll grant you wishes if you make her wings sprout...[/QUOTE] Good idea, lets call her Tinkerbell. I always did figure Peter Pan was hittin that tiny pussy, but the children's story writers kept it hush hush...

[QUOTE=Laxman #2]Recently LoveLOS and others on this board have posted on AMP providers and experiences and given LARS™ ratings. In the interest of giving newer members a heads up, the following is reposted.

Originally Posted by Laxman #2
With the Winter Olympics upon us, it strikes me that we need to address the problem of subjective scoring. I would like to propose a standard scoring system for the DC AMP scene that I have named the Lax AMP Rating System (“LARS”™) as follows:

0 – I’m going to slit my wrists
1 – Worst ever
2 – I wouldn’t f**k her with ****’s dick
3 – Really bad
4 – Not recommended, avoid
5 – Adequate, standard fare
6 – Good, above average
7 – Superior
8 – Highly recommended, must see
9 – OMFG, best ever
10 – So good I’m keeping this one for myself

Peace and love

Lax

Ahem. A LL Rating system indeed!!!!

You'll be hearing from my barristers, wigs and all!

Lax[/QUOTE]

Hey Lax

Great work I like your style. Thanks for the Lax AMP Rating System, I have not visited an AMP in years, perhaps I need a guided tour.

I have reposted below the BRS no not BSR, BRS Big Red Rating System for SW Looks.

I have generated
SW/Escort Stats
Looks/body/attitude/service
8/9/9/8

Question for senior members:
• Should we standardize statistics, for escorts and SW?
• Should the evaluation criterion be different for escorts and SW?
• Should there be standards for points given? For example:

Big Red Rating System for SW Looks:
1. Fugly no teeth, hair or skin, scabs only
2. Curtis Bay Ugly don’t let your friend f**k her
3. Regular ugly not f**ckable unless stoned
4. Minor ugly ok to f**k if drunk
5. Average ok to f**k any time (this is where Big Red tries to draw the line)
6. Pretty well groomed
7. Attractive face and appearance
8. Hot and sexy looking
9. Model Material
10. Goddess perfect in every way

If there is interest, I will work on other categories and a weighted composite scoring system.

Just trying to give back and do my part.

Big Red

[QUOTE=LoveLOS]Good idea, lets call her Tinkerbell. I always did figure Peter Pan was hittin that tiny pussy, but the children's story writers kept it hush hush...[/QUOTE]

Tinkerbell it is! Can't wait to see her spreading her little wings again...

[QUOTE=Rutdude]Had a horrible experience at the new Gold Spa (1829 M, 2nd floor) today. The girl (she said her name was Coco) provided very poor service and had a terrible attitude. Constantly kept pushing me back to check if wrapper was on. Constantly using kleenex to wipe herself. Just lay there mechanically for the 10 minutes I was there. Even complaining when I approached certain areas. I'm a clean guy, very particular about hygiene and have received very good GFE at Sun and I-bar before. Given the recent reported problems at those places, decided to try something new. Guess I tried the wrong place or received a terrible provider. Left after 10-15 minutes, was getting turned off by the attitude rather than getting turned on.[/QUOTE]

Rut:

You may not realize it but yours was a very valuable report. I think it is always useful to know the places and providers to avoid. Thanks

Lax