The Raleigh area "Sugar Bowl" (SA, WYP, SD4 ME)

Avoid this one, waste of time. Not from Durham and wants money via PayPal first. Most likely some dude. LOL.

[URL]https://seekingarrangement.com/messages/28fb1b17-1e46-4c12-be65-069531e5e7f6?mailbox=inbox[/URL]

Lhillxoxo.

[QUOTE=JMonger;3588279]...I ended up back at AM, where the women are often less nubile (though often more interesting) - and are just as concerned with keeping everything on the QT as I am. That I don't have to 'buy' them, makes the relationship just that more comfortable for me; not to mention economical.[/QUOTE]How has AM in the Triangle area been for you?

[QUOTE=PghGuy2005;3600294]How has AM in the Triangle area been for you?[/QUOTE]It has been a while since I was on there, but I had some great times.

You have to learn to spot the bots, and it helps a lot if you like fat, middle-aged women.

I had one woman from AM turn into an ongoing affair that lasted nearly two years. I got careless and my wife found out. If not for that, I'd still be banging her weekly.

[QUOTE=SailorSam;3600330]It has been a while since I was on there, but I had some great times.

You have to learn to spot the bots, and it helps a lot if you like fat, middle-aged women.

I had one woman from AM turn into an ongoing affair that lasted nearly two years. I got careless and my wife found out. If not for that, I'd still be banging her weekly.[/QUOTE]I have been around the block too many times, sorry but what is AM?

[URL]https://seekingarrangement.com/member/d770f9c9-0dd9-4cf9-8d66-9c5f8b2287bb[/URL]

I have had pretty good luck with AM. I'm am currently in my fourth relationship. A couple of which have gone on for multiple years.

What I like is that I get a true GFE experience, we text, we phone, we occasionally meet for lunch, and then every week or so get away for a 3-4 hour session that includes GFE, DATY, MSOG, and anything else we feel like trying (It is the only way I will go bareback). All for the cost of a hotel room (though, my current lady often has her house available, so it is the cost of a trip across town).

All this is under the radar as we both have families. This means it is understood when I'm not available, I don't have to buy gifts, etc. There are a lot of advantages to the situation.

I understand that there used to be a large number of fake profiles, though I that seems to have been reduced since they were caught at it. When I get on, I recognize many of the same profiles I saw a year ago. In a couple cases, ones that I have met. Not sure if it is because I filter to the ones that are active, or because I prefer more mature women, but it is rare that I get a reply that doesn't lead to details that someone in the area would have to write. Sadly, it is even rarer that I get a reply at all. But that is part of the deal.

To my surprise, while the women I have talked to admit to being inundated with emails, they indicate the vast majority are not attractive (for instance, being overtly sexual or sending provocative pictures seems to be an instant fail for the women I have talked with). I have been told that while we have a lot of competition, the competition isn't very competitive when it comes to identifying what most women are looking for.

Though I budgeted about the cost of an low-end incall ($150), I normally run about $20-50 in AM costs and a few hours composing text (but most content is recyclable. I send the same material largely unchanged to everyone). It usually includes a lunch meeting or two to make sure we are compatible, then the fun starts.

The one negative is the lead time. I'm finding it takes a while, and some false starts, to get a relationship started (but then, at my age, I'm not that hot a property). YMMV.

[QUOTE=PghGuy2005;3600294]How has AM in the Triangle area been for you?[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=Raltime;3600793]I have been around the block too many times, sorry but what is AM?[/QUOTE]

A and M are the first letters of popular female names. A what is left after something burns and M the fourth president

[QUOTE=JMonger;3601087]I have had pretty good luck with AM. I'm am currently in my fourth relationship. A couple of which have gone on for multiple years.
...
To my surprise, while the women I have talked to admit to being inundated with emails, they indicate the vast majority are not attractive (for instance, being overtly sexual or sending provocative pictures seems to be an instant fail for the women I have talked with). I have been told that while we have a lot of competition, the competition isn't very competitive when it comes to identifying what most women are looking for.
...
The one negative is the lead time. I'm finding it takes a while, and some false starts, to get a relationship started (but then, at my age, I'm not that hot a property). YMMV.[/QUOTE]JM,

I really appreciate you taking the time in composing this very helpful post. Any ideas on profiles / messages that will pique women's interest?!

[QUOTE=JMonger;3601087]I have had pretty good luck with AM. I'm am currently in my fourth relationship. A couple of which have gone on for multiple years.

What I like is that I get a true GFE experience, we text, we phone, we occasionally meet for lunch, and then every week or so get away for a 3-4 hour session that includes GFE, DATY, MSOG, and anything else we feel like trying (It is the only way I will go bareback). All for the cost of a hotel room (though, my current lady often has her house available, so it is the cost of a trip across town).

All this is under the radar as we both have families. This means it is understood when I'm not available, I don't have to buy gifts, etc. There are a lot of advantages to the situation.

I understand that there used to be a large number of fake profiles, though I that seems to have been reduced since they were caught at it. When I get on, I recognize many of the same profiles I saw a year ago. In a couple cases, ones that I have met. Not sure if it is because I filter to the ones that are active, or because I prefer more mature women, but it is rare that I get a reply that doesn't lead to details that someone in the area would have to write. Sadly, it is even rarer that I get a reply at all. But that is part of the deal.

To my surprise, while the women I have talked to admit to being inundated with emails, they indicate the vast majority are not attractive (for instance, being overtly sexual or sending provocative pictures seems to be an instant fail for the women I have talked with). I have been told that while we have a lot of competition, the competition isn't very competitive when it comes to identifying what most women are looking for..[/QUOTE]Your one of the few that has had any luck with AM. I heard the fake profile thing was worse than before the actual hacking of the website. After that hack I have no idea why anybody would trust them again.

There may be fake profiles. But they don't appear to be in the profiles for women over 40. I carefully track the interesting profiles and all communications and haven't found the evidence yet. I just don't see a pattern of new, TGTBT profiles showing up, attracting traffic, then disappearing (though I do see this for profiles that never get completed as people test the water). One thing I do get is a low reply rate. But that seems to be common for this type of website. I also get frequent 'canned' replies requesting that I invest the $2 to send an introductory message (all subsequent messages are free). When I discussed this with my lover, she said that there are list of them available to women and that the replies can be automated. Sometimes I'll bite (the cost is low) and a couple times this has led to conversations that are clearly a person. The only real 'fake' items I have run into are miss-stated weights, 10 year old pictures, and those that are just testing the water and back out when the rubber meets the road. Same as SA.

Though if you are looking for a women who is 20 years your junior, then SA is the place to go, not AM. The M / F ratio is not on our side at AM and generally women are looking for a guy that is attractive to them, not a SD.

As to their cyber-security, I'm in IT and we are famous for locking the barn door after the cows have fled. I'm confident that the IT security is now top-notch. For a while. But not so confident that I don't use a VPN, unconnected third-party email, a gift-card purchased with cash for payment, and a burner when it comes to personal contact. Same as we should use for any website or service. I'm more concerned now about the web sites that haven't been (publicly) burned yet like 411 and BKS.

[QUOTE=JohnHandCock;3601328]Your one of the few that has had any luck with AM. I heard the fake profile thing was worse than before the actual hacking of the website. After that hack I have no idea why anybody would trust them again.[/QUOTE]

I find I'm more attracted to ads with pictures, so I put a picture of myself up, somewhat anonymized by blocking out my eyes (which give me away). (One lady I had a two year relationship with, told me she almost didn't contact me because posting a picture showed I wasn't discreet enough. Go figure). The one consistent piece of feedback I have received is that the language in my profile and emails were the most important. I took the time to compose text that reads smoothly, is very polite, describes dating activities ('walks in the park', 'watching a sunset together') and only hints at what we are really there for. I describe how I want to get to know them as a person and friend, and refer to sex rarely and largely through innuendo instead of being salacious. I try not to be grandiose, instead admit failings ('lousy dancer') and poke fun at male stereotypes ('my ego isn't tied to my car') . Remembering that it feels risky to meet with a strange man for sex, I try to describe a ever polite professional who is not at all threatening, but has hidden potential. In emails I focus on them, asking them to expand on material they have presented in their profiles or previous email, and sharing any similar experience I have had.

As I previously mentioned, explicit pictures or text are a turnoff with the women I have met. If you want to show that you are fit, get a picture outdoors, running a 5 K or something.

It can be a delicate dance to reel them in (though, frankly, that is half the fun) - and many get away. If money is no object, SA may be a better choice. But because I like having a relationship as well as sex, for me this can't be beat.

[QUOTE=PghGuy2005;3601305]JM,

I really appreciate you taking the time in composing this very helpful post. Any ideas on profiles / messages that will pique women's interest?![/QUOTE]

I should probably mention that we are entering the 'dry period' for AM. With Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas, many wives and mothers have a lot on their plate and responses are way down. Another caveat of this type of 'dating' site.

[URL]https://www.seekingarrangement.com/member/7df175d7-8364-47d7-8183-f1869efff787[/URL]

I texted with her for a day or two after which she asked me to call her during the conversation I could hear a guy talking to her in the background and was told it is her brother. Creepy! She was unhappy that I was using a burner phone and hence was not sure if I was real.

[QUOTE=PghGuy2005;3607252][URL]https://www.seekingarrangement.com/member/7df175d7-8364-47d7-8183-f1869efff787[/URL]

I texted with her for a day or two after which she asked me to call her during the conversation I could hear a guy talking to her in the background and was told it is her brother. Creepy! She was unhappy that I was using a burner phone and hence was not sure if I was real.[/QUOTE]I agree. I met with her and she seemed ok at first. But then when I tried to schedule the FC, things got weird quickly. Was originally told she could host and was a hairdresser of sorts. Then was told she couldn't host b / c her mom was in town. Then her mom had to go to the hospital. Then her mom lost consciousness, regained consciousness, and then her mom died. Add in a bizarre text exchange where her name is actually 'Julius' or something.

Be careful!

[QUOTE=PghGuy2005;3607252][URL]https://www.seekingarrangement.com/member/7df175d7-8364-47d7-8183-f1869efff787[/URL]

I texted with her for a day or two after which she asked me to call her during the conversation I could hear a guy talking to her in the background and was told it is her brother. Creepy! She was unhappy that I was using a burner phone and hence was not sure if I was real.[/QUOTE]Yeah, looking at her pictures, two were obviously taken in a cheap hotel room. I always check the pictures for clues. When looking for pro's I want to see a hotel room setting, when looking for pots I'm looking for home or dorm-room selfies. At best she's a new to town pro.