The PhatDaty guide to the Ultimate GFE
I have read a few recent disgruntled reviews and General Reports that makes me wonder if some senior member tutelage might come in handy.
1) If you are blessed with the ability to recover quickly and manage more than one pop in a session than most of us, don't book a HHR session, as most women, provider or not, will view 30 minutes or less of sex as a "slam, bam, thank you mam" encounter. If you really are capable of getting multiple pops in 15 minutes or less, be clear, without being profane in your communication with a provider that you are seeking such a session.
2) If you want a GFE, put some effort into your session or roll the dice that your donation is strictly a YMMMV session. Providers are women, first and foremost, and yes, our donation should buy us some measure of our dreams, but a little foreplay or romance will stoke the fire and get get you a high ROI.
3) Tips are great, but believe it or not, most providers are human beings and a thoughtful gift or act of kindness goes a long way. Obviously, if it is an incall, you need to be careful what you carry in, but a box of chocolates, a candle or some other small token will do wonders. If it is an outcall, you can get more creative.
4) Personal Hygiene goes a long way. If you smell like a goat, have cheese crotch, or have the grooming of a Yeti down below, no amount of money is going to help even if the provider is an academy award level actress. Take a friggin shower, use soap, and brush and floss.
5) Try some foreplay. Read a book, Google the word, watch a romantic porn instead of gonzo fetish stuff and learn how to seduce a woman. Take it from a fat, ugly guy, if you know your way around a woman's body, civilian or pro, you get what you put into an encounter. If you can learn how to give a decent massage, caress a woman's body, eat pussy with a modicum of knowledge, it is is just as good as money. Yes, they are in this for business, but if they enjoy the session as much as you do, guess what, your Benjamins are worth more than the other guy's Benjamins all things being equal.
6) Don't be an asshole. That means, show up on time, don't text them 14 times a day and jackoff while you interact with them, or fifty other ways to piss off a provider. Ask whoever your regular is to instruct you and she will fill you in on the tire-kicking shit that gets on most women's nerves, and sets a bad impression before you ever walk in the door and lay that donation on the dresser.
To quote Sean Connery:
"Here endeth the lesson."
Dear God, FINALLY someone has stated the obvious.
[QUOTE=TheGoodSh; 1721824]I'm happy to put on my flame-retardant gear and post what might be the minority view (or the normally silent view) but I'd rather the reviews just give the basics instead of a detailed play-by-play when all was good. I just read this long review of Nadia, and wow. She sounds great. But I'd rather just know she is reliable, willing, available, safe, and if the pics are her (or whatever). I don't actually want to read about all the stuff that went down. The last thing I want to think about when I'm with a provider is all the other guys she's been with. Quote]
Thank you TheGoodSh for saying, so eloquently, what I feel every time I read one of these lavish narratives.
It seems guys like PD like to see themselves in writing, like to brag, like to impress the rest of us.
Sorry, not impressed. Braggarts just rub me the wrong way, in whatever part of my life I come into contact with them.
To offer THAT much detail regarding one's experience with a woman, on such a public board, is just disrespectful to the woman and boring to the rest of us.
Look, all civility aside, if I were a woman, and any jackball wrote that about me? Last visit, baby.
God but I hate bragging. That is ALL it is.
It almost borders on sick.
Get some help, PhatDATY, whoever the hell you are.
I'm going to mostly agree with you.
[QUOTE=TheGoodSh;1721824]And finally (because I'm sure I've pissed all your helpful people off by slagging off a prominent member of our community) anybody with any advice on how / if to give a mediocre review? If it was great. Easy. If it was a ripoff. No problem. But what do you do when the experience is just not that great? What do you do when you might not have been into it, into her, or distracted? I don't know. Tell me. I don't post reviews yet here, because I've not had anything worthwhile to add and don't want to piss off the SPs who probably read these boards with a less-than-glowing review which I feel wouldn't affect most of the rest of you, because you aren't me. You might have a lovely time with them. They might be hot and sexy to you, but not me. WALDT. But if I say I didn't like something. To her it is personal. I might want to see her again, give her another try, or decide I don't mind whatever I didn't like before. What if she reads the review and resents it? Makes me want to back-channel everything. But that defeats part of what is good about this place. Anyway. Do you guys post reviews which are not raves and not rants? Do you just say it was a nice time. Even if it wasn't one you'd actually recommend or repeat?[/QUOTE]At a certain point the "review" stops being a review and becomes an advertisement. There is a term in South America for a guy who gets discount or free services in exchange for a fake favorable review. It's called a 503 or a 530 or something, I can't really remember. I'm not saying that's what PD did but too much info on this site is not a good thing. This is a public forum that any non registered user can read. You are correct about the oThER site. The juicy details are there, but only for paying members if they want to see them. I think services received should be part of a review but a list of abbreviations is just fine.
As far as posting a mediocre review here is my best advice. Sometimes it's best not to post a review. If she is nice and she tries to do a good job but you just don't click or a physical characteristic of your is interfering with her abilities it's not her fault. It's better not to say anything then to damage a good girls reputation. If you want to post something about a girl that isn't flattering be a little cryptic in that portion and invite people to PM you for more details. Unless a girl does a cash and dash there is no reason not to be polite. Think about what you are writing."I probably won't repeat" and "I might repeat" basically mean the same thing but one is positive and the other is negative. If a girl reads about something you didn't like maybe she will learn from that and if you see her again she will already know. If you treat a girl with respect during the session and your review is honest and respectful she won't hold it against you.
