[QUOTE=Astrosaki;3570419]I've lurked here for a while but never tried, any advice would be appreciated once you're all done laughing at me.
Went to the bluestar by hoover They close at 1030 and I went at about 940 so I figured I couldn't get an hour. Paid 30 for half hour. Lady told me to go into a room and strip. She wasn't that old looking either. Maybe 35, slim in a sweater and sweatpants but I could tell she had a decent body. Saw another lady at the desk and she wasn't unattractive either. Keep in mind I've never set foot in a massage parlor until today. Got butt naked, put my clothes in the corner and laid face down with the towel just covering my ass. She knocked then came in still in sweats. For some reason I was under the delusion she would be in a robe or lingerie.
She draped the towel over me completely and started the massage. Just a reminder I've never actually had a massage before so I don't know what a real one or even a good one feels like but she was just pressing down on my legs a little at a time and my back etc. I didn't feel all that relaxed to be completely honest and I wouldn't call it enjoyable. Also I don't know if this is worth mentioning or not but I laid with my arms up, past my head. Not sure if this is what you're supposed to do or not. I realized if the goal was to roam and touch her I couldn't in this position because she was working on me from the other way.
She told me to flip and my member was in full view and quite flaccid. Am I supposed to be fully errect at this stage? I'm a visual and tactile kind of guy so I didn't have much to go on. Was that where I screwed up? She draped the towel on me again and this time my arms were at my side.
She massaged me from above at some point working on my shoulders and chest and her chest was inches above my head. I may have nudged her tit with my forehead a little. If you haven't picked up on it yet I'm really bad at this. Then when she was squeezing my legs and putting random pressure on my hips near my groin I moved my hand and touched the side of her legs. At this point I had serious doubts this was a place offering extras and I didn't fully commit because I was half scared some bouncer would throw me out of the place and I'd have to walk home nude. I wish I were kidding.
She left the room at one point and came back. No big deal. I'm reading into everything way too hard now.
I tried to get a tent up but couldn't do it on my own (that's why I came here right, or so I thought). When she came back she spread my legs and got on the table too and started massaging the inside of my legs. This was the only enjoyable and semi erotic part and I was starting to draw wood and then she starts lightly punching (tapping) the insides of my legs. I wasn't ready for that and clenched a little thinking she might hit my pebbles during her boxing match with my legs. Lost any semblance of a stiffie and then a few seconds later she says all done.
I change, tip her the $10 change she gave me from breaking my 40 and thank everybody in sight then left a little bewildered, a lot embarrassed and very determined to try again.
Side note: I think they were speaking Chinese.
So has anyone else been here? Is this place legit or am I just an idiot, or probably both?[/QUOTE]Just go to Bluemoon on the corner of Balboa and Vanowen in the SF valley. This place will be easy and to the point. All this secret code or cryptic info can be annoying on here so I hope this helps. It's not LA but I'm sure it's not far from you. Look them up.
