[QUOTE=DJprofessorK;6306558]Years ago, when I was much younger, I used to frequent a reddit forum about sugaring. I had no idea what I was doing so I was looking for insight. Instead, what I found were mostly one-sided conversations about how women could get as much money from men as possible and ceaseless complaints about how men on the site are garbage. Offering counter points was usually shouted down and the few men that did chime in, usually gave fairy tale accounts about how they'd give their SB's everything she could ever want and he NEVER expected intimacy. The whole thing was laughable to me. Of course, I can only speak to my personal experiences and what SB's have told me during our interactions. And that forum just didn't reflect reality.
You were immediately downvoted into oblivion if you were to bring up any of the following topics:
-Women seeking out arrangements with the explicit goal of never providing sugar.
-Women who were using Seeking for a steady rotation of free meals and paid M&G's.
-Women who would berate men for not immediately agreeing to insane requests.
-Women who use Seeking to find informal ways of getting large personal loans that they don't qualify for through traditional means.
-Women who claim to be SB's but absolutely do NOT want to hear from you unless it involves you paying them.
-Women who aren't interested in being seen with you and in many cases can't stand you, but will begrudgingly agree to interactions.
-The number of PROS working on the site.
-Content sellers who have no intention of meeting up.
-Women whose lives were falling apart due to their own actions and expected a stranger to up and save them with little notice.
(Please, before anyone gets upset: Over half of the things listed above were told to me DIRECTLY from women. If you've done this long enough, women will spill the beans.).
Conversely, I make no claims that men aren't on the site using it improperly. It would be ridiculous to say such a thing. We're all aware of men trying to get free dates. We're all aware of men who harass women on the site. We're all aware of that fact that women are putting themselves in situations that may result in traumatic experiences or assault. None of those things are condoned. In fact, I've often seen men on this forum warning against men mistreating women, up to and including specific members being called out. Sure there is room for improvement, but there does seem to be some level of self-policing.
Additionally, I can't lie, many of my experiences with SB's have benefitted from the fact that I treated them BETTER than other men have. And it wasn't like I did anything extraordinary, I just wasn't a jerk. That's it. I also immediately block any profiles with the words 'heiress', 'princess', 'duchess', 'brat' or 'muse'. Too often this is just code for: 'pay me, don't touch me. '.
I realize that we're all just attempting to make it to the next day, week, month or year. I get that. But I hate that in some places, it can't be discussed that women are also part of the problem when it comes to exploiting SA. I have to head to Vegas for a 5 day conference in about a month, and the stories of stupidity in the Vegas forum often blow my mind. Stories such as, 'I expect 5 K a month and I don't want to text unless it's the day of the meet' and 'I want someone to fund my life so I don't have to and don't expect sugar' are not uncommon.
Can't we just agree that there are people on both sides of the site that want to game the system and get what they want with as little effort / expense as possible?
Please don't mistake this for a post about being critical of women in general. It's not. It's about us not being able to have honest conversations about the world of sugaring. If someone can't level with me like a human being, I walk. I'm tired of people giving delusional and dishonest accounts of the sugaring world without being honest about 'their side', men or women.
If a guy can be berated for 'wanting to get laid', a woman can get the same for 'wanting to get paid to do nothing'. Or is that asking too much?
(my apologies for the long, rambling post. I'm nailing down the final details on my business trip and wanted to build in a little fun during my down time, and some of the posts from the Vegas forum got to me.).[/QUOTE]Great post about SLF. I agree with your points.
